Disclaimer: I don't own GLEE or its characters though I wish I did.
Author's Note: Hiya, world! Thanks to all who reviewed/alert-ed/read! Here's chapter two which is quite angsty (Finn being DEPLORABLE)! I have a very short chapter three typed up but I'm gonna pace this one...hopefully it'll make it more enjoyable! Anyways, ENJOY!
She sits alone in the far corner of the choir room later that day, her gaze averted to her lap. Her supposed second family all ignore her and turn away, excluding her from the group discussion. Santana is running it, of course, while everyone pretends to be enthralled by what she's saying.
Every time she sees Santana, she wants to hit her -so hard. That girl makes her life miserable on a daily basis. That girl screwed up the one thing that made her truly happen. And that girl stole him and rubs it in her face every chance she gets.
But she can't seem to find the strength to stand up for herself. Her guilt and hurt has made her weak. And it's not like she'll ever shut that girl up. She's relentless.
She hears Santana say something about her being a dwarf as everyone scoffs and she tries to hide how much that stings. Santana smirks at her, gauging her reaction as she spares them all a glance. She wants it to not affect her and she wants to defend herself before storming out.
But it does hurt, especially when he puts his arm around the girl's shoulders and snickers. And she can't find the words to sound confident even in her head. And she can't storm out because she can't find the will to get up and leave.
She turns away from their ridiculing, smug faces and chances a glance at the clock. Rehearsal hasn't even started and she already wants it to be over.
Moments later, Artie wheels himself in and without even sparing the group a glance, her rolls over to her with a large smile. "Hey Rachel" he greets cheerily, parking himself right beside her. The piercing eyes of the Glee Club make her feel uncomfortable as she gives him a small smile in return, biting her tongue before she tells him that everyone will hate him for doing this.
"So, how was your day?" Artie asks blithely, seeming oblivious to the watchful, judgmental crowd that fell silent to not-so-stealthily eavesdrop.
"Umm..." She clears her throat to clear it of any hoarseness or emotion as she takes a deep breath. "Good...yours?"
"Boring as hell" he says in a groan. "I had History. Mrs. O'Neil really needs to retire. She mumbles and we don't even know what the hell she's talking about because I'm pretty sure Lincoln isn't president anymore..."
She allows a laugh to leave her lips as Artie smiles triumphantly before continuing his rant. She really appreciates his efforts. It's nice to know someone has a heart here.
She tries to ignore the whispers and seething glares from the people behind her but she deflates nonetheless. She hates putting Artie in this position. He's too good of a person to be detested along with her.
"Alright guys, let's start it up" Mr. Schue says as he strides into the choir room. He claps his hands together as everyone turns their attention to him. "Now...I-"
His hand shoots up, silencing everyone in shock as Mr. Schue quirks his eyebrow in surprise. "Umm...yes, Finn?"
"I have a song" he announces, a certain vain manner, already heading to the front. "I didn't get to sing it at Christmas but it has New Year's in it, too."
"Uh...alright" Mr. Schue says with a disbelieving laugh. "Love the enthusiasm. Go ahead."
He clears his throat, smugness radiating. "You guys will probably know who this is about" he begins with a scoff. "If not...well I don't think anybody's that dumb. I hope this gets my point across." He turns to glower directly at her and she shifts under his glare before he turns to the band and gives them a nod.
Once the music starts up, her chest tightens severely making it hard to breathe.
He couldn't.
"These are your good years
Don't take my advice
You never wanted the nice boys anyway
And I'm of good cheer
'Cause I've been checking my list
The gifts you're receiving from me
Will be..."
She chances a glance at him to see that he's singing at her, swaggering along the row as he sings. The club claps and sings along, as he pulls Santana up with him to the front in further humiliation for her. Artie stays put, his eyes sympathetic as he gauges her reaction.
She can't believe this is happening.
"One awkward silence
And two hopes you cry yourself to sleep
Staying up, waiting by the phone
And all I want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me
Before you bury yourself alive..."
She ducks her head, her eyes welling up with merciless tears. She knows what she did was selfish and mean. She knows she hurt him badly. She knows she's a horrible person but this...this was a step too far. She feels so derided and hurt she can't breathe.
She feels like she'll be sick all over Artie.
"Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree
Merry Christmas, I could care less
"Happy New Years, baby
You owe me
The best gift I will ever ask for
Don't call me up, when the snow comes down
Its the only thing I want this year..."
She bites her lip so hard that she draws blood as her eyes flicker closed from the sheer pain of it all. Her heart was broken before in Finn's possession but now it's crushed with no hope of repair. She can practically feel it, laying shatteredin the palm of his hand.
And he could care less.
"One awkward silence
And two hopes you cry yourself to sleep
Staying up, waiting by the phone
And all I want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me
Before you bury yourself alive..."
Her face is burning, hot in embarrassment and sadness as she swallows the lump in her throat. Artie places his hand on her back in a comforting way but unfortumately provides none as the club dance and sing around her, all banning together.
She's never felt so hated and humiliated in her life.
"Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree
Merry Christmas, I could care less
"Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree (Don't come home for Christmas)
Merry Christmas, I could care less
"Don't come home for Christmas
You're the last thing I wanna see
Underneath the tree (Don't come home for Christmas)
Merry Christmas, I could care less."
He finishes after what feels like hours with Santana all over him. Everyone claps and whoops, including Mr. Schue who's laughing. She tastes the salt and iron from tears and blood on her tongue as she quickly wipes her eyes with the back of her hand. She refuses to look up and let them all see how much it hurt, instead looking down at her hands that rest on her lap, mortified beyond belief.
"That was great, Finn" Mr. Schue exclaims proudly. "What was your inspiration?"
Before he can respond, Santana pipes up with a vicious remark. "That dwarf RuPaul over there" she sneers deridingly. "He finally shut her up! We're celebrating Finnocence's return the world of the cool." She can feel the girl's eyes on her. "Aw...poor, Berry. No one loves you. I-"
"Shut up, Santana" Artie snarls, surprising everyone. "Jeez can you shut your big fat mouth for two seconds? Damn, I have a frigging migraine listening to you squawk." He huffs in annoyance, rubbing his eyes wearily. "That was just mean! I'm sick and tired of listening to you talk and talk and talk and state your ignorant opinions about everything! News flash: no one cares what you have to say! No one's listening! The only reason people pretend to like you is because they think they can get in bed with you or they're scared of you! Just shut up!"
The shocked silence is deafening as she glances between Artie and Santana. Santana is absolutely fuming and Artie is staring challengingly at her. Her jaw is hanging open as well as the rest of the club's as Santana, after another beat of silence, storms out with a growl.
"Umm..." Mr. Schue mumbles, breaking the thick silence. "I think we've had enough for one day. You're all dismissed...practice tomorrow."
After a few tense moments, people warily begin to shuffle out incredulously. He stays stationary, watching her. She locks eyes with him for a long moment and doesn't care if he sees her vulnerability.
Artie pats her back, bringing her to reality. "You okay?" he murmurs.
She tears her gaze away from him, giving Artie a smile. She's so damn thankful for him. "Yah" she whispers with a nod. "Thanks. I-I really appreciate that. You have no idea."
He beams, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "Hey, I'm here for you. I'll see you tomorrow." He begins to wheel away and she smiles slightly when he calls over his shoulder: "He-who-must-not-be-named-'cause-he's-a-jerk is next!"
She sits, shaking her head in awe as he wheels out the door, brushing past him, almost running over his toe on purpose. She chuckles lightly at her friend's antics before getting to her feet.
When she realizes he's hovering, all signs of amusement and optimism vanish. She swallows thickly, taking a deep breath before beginning to head toward the door.
"Rachel, can I talk to you for a minute?"
Relief flows through her when she hears the words spoken by Mr. Schue as she quickly turns toward the teacher, nodding. She takes a seat by the piano when he gestures to it, watching as he catches sight of him.
"Finn, do you need something?" Mr. Schue asks in confusion.
She stares at him as he rocks awkwardly on his heels and nervously shoves his hands in his pockets. "Umm...no" he finally murmurs. "I was just leaving."
He glances at her again but she quickly looks away. With a sigh, he disappears from the room but some part of her knows that he isn't really gone.
AN#2: *GASP!* How could Finn! haha
Next Chapter: Mr. Schue & Rachel's conversation
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