Romantic version. And yeah, I agree- way too much AO, not enough CO. I mean, Alex is great and all, but I just like Casey more. She and Olivia just make a better couple. And may I just say that, in the actual episode, Casey should have been mad at Olivia? She just walked in there calmly and asked, "Why'd you rat me out to the DA?" I was like, NO! Be mad at her! Stand up for yourself! Whatever. Here you go.

Here and now

"Where did you get this?" Casey whispered as she started at the single sheet of paper, and then at Jack.

But of course, she already knew the answer to her question.

Many people knew about her relationship with Charlie. Her friends and colleagues at the time, Charlie's family, her own meager assortment of relatives who'd shown up at the hospital, god knows why- hell, even the police who responded to the disturbance call.

But only one of them would have done this. Only one of them had the means, motive, and opportunity to bring this ancient history back into the light. Look at that, she thought with a chuckle, I was just betrayed by my best friend/lover and I still think like a lawyer.

Jack's still talking, though. "-and if you ever pull a stunt like this again, I'll have you disbarred, and don't think I don't have the contacts to pull that off, because I do! Do I make myself clear?" Casey nodded absentmindedly as she turned to leave, no longer concentrating on his threat but on turning her sadness at the betrayal into anger. Someone was going to pay for this.

SVUSVUSVU

Casey stalked into the squad room, smiling when she saw it deserted except for one, who still hadn't noticed her presence yet. She walked forward as quietly as she could until she was standing right behind the detective, then snapped, "Turn around."

Olivia jumped and shot upright, taking an automatic step back. "Casey! What are you-"

The ADA interrupted her with a quick slap to the face. "You know what I'm doing here." Olivia stared at her, shocked and angry, and was about to start talking when Casey continued, slowly backing her up against a wall. "Now, what you did would have been really funny if it had been some secret, embarrassing crush. Unfortunately for you, it wasn't. And since you seem incapable of understanding anybody else because you are so self-centered, let me give it to you this way: When you asked me to plead out Carrie Eldridge, what did I do? Did I go running to your boss and start spilling secrets about your past? No, I pled her out, even though it got me suspended. What I did in court today was exactly the same thing you did- sure, he was physically guilty of the crimes, but mentally, he couldn't be held responsible! Only difference is, this time around, my choice didn't hurt anybody!"

"It hurt Elliot!"

"Oh, give me a break, Benson, it didn't hurt him. You were just being overprotective of him, like you are with all your friends. Which I'm not, apparently."

Olivia stared at her in shock. "Casey, what are you talking about, of course you're my friend-"

"Yeah, right! You had sex with me and still chose Elliot over me! I kept what you told me a secret, why couldn't you do the same for me? If I was just some cheap hooker to you, someone you used whenever you wanted to have sex, you should have told me! I'm Catholic, we don't have sex with somebody just for enjoyment, we do it because we love them, but if you don't love me, then-"

"Casey!" Olivia shouted, grabbing her by the shoulders and turning her around, pinning her back against the wall. "I do love you! But what you did was wrong, and I wasn't going to-"

"Stop feeding me these ridiculous lines, okay? It had nothing to do with justice, you just wanted revenge for what Picard did to Elliot!" Olivia opened her mouth to say something, but Casey stopped her with, "No, you listen to me, Olivia Benson. Charlie's dead. I got a call from the morgue last week to come identify his body, and now the DA throw's this is my face when I can't deal with it all because you-" she jabbed her finger in Olivia's face, "decided to tell him the worst thing I ever did. I'm going home, to my apartment. If you haven't shown up by midnight to apologize, we're through. And by apologize, I don't mean makeup sex, I mean you actually talk to me. If you can't handle that, then don't you dare ever contact me outside of work or show up at my apartment again. And if you ever do something like this again, I don't care what the hell you do or say, there's a better chance of hell freezing over then us ever working together as a couple again." Casey turned and stormed out, glad she finally could, because she didn't want Olivia to see her cry.

SVUSVUSVU

There was a hesitant knock on her door at 11:50. "Casey?" a soft voice called. "It's Olivia. Can I come in?" Pulling her jacket tighter around herself, Casey got up and wiped the tears off her cheeks, tucking the picture of her and Charlie into her pocket, then opened the door.

"What do you want?" she asked as coldly as she could.

"I came to apologize... Casey, I am so sorry." The ADA paused uncertainly, then turned around and walked back inside, leaving her door open. She heard Olivia follow quietly behind. "You're right, I was trying to get revenge for Elliot... I didn't know he was dead, Casey. I mean, I knew something was wrong but never suspected it had to do with him. I mean, that doesn't excuse what I did, but still, I... I'm sorry. If I could take it back, I would, and I know you might not trust me anymore and you have every right to hate me. But, Casey..." Olivia didn't want to push her luck, but she had to get two things across to Casey, no matter what. Eventually, she continued, "You said I revealed the worst thing you had ever done. That's not true. Yes, what I did was terrible and I know it hurt you, and I'm sorry, but leaving Charlie was not the worst thing you have ever done. Far from it, Casey. You had to save yourself. If you had stayed, you would have been the one who wound up dead, just another one of the those faceless drifters in the morgue killed by an abusive husband."

"Don't talk about him like that!"

"Why not? It's true!"

"It wasn't his fault!" Casey shouted, glaring at her in shock.

Olivia shook her head as she approached her. "I'm not saying it was. But you tried to make him get help, and he wouldn't. You had every right to protect yourself; it was your life being threatened, your body- he put you in the hospital and you did nothing to deserve it. You were scared for your life, Casey, that is not a bad reason to-"

"I loved him! I still do! He didn't know what he was doing!"

Olivia had to get through to Casey, because, frankly, she was sick of it. Sick of her blaming herself when it wasn't her fault in the slightest, sick of her making excuses for the bastard that broke her body and her heart. Not that she minded being there for her- she was sick of Charlie still hurting Casey this much. She could never be sick of Casey. But this had to stop if Casey ever wanted to get on with her life. "Listen to me," she ordered, gently pushing her back against the wall. Casey's pupils dilated in what Olivia recognized as extreme fear, but she decided to push on. "Just because he was schizophrenic does not excuse what he did to you. I love you very much, Casey, but I'm going to make you tell me what he did to you, and then you tell me who's fault it really was."

Casey just stared at her, trembling slightly, then whispered, "Yes ma'am. Whatever you want, ma'am."

Olivia took a step back, not sure what to make of it. Neither one of them was into the 'master, slave' thing, and even if they had been, Casey wasn't the type to worm her way out of something through sex. "Casey, what are you doing?"

"Nothing, ma'am. I'm sorry for disappointing you. I'll do whatever you want, just, please, don't hurt me..."

It took Olivia a second to understand what was going on. When she did, she immediately let go of Casey and took another step back and held up her hands to show her she was unarmed. "Casey, listen to me. It's just me, Olivia. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm sorry I grabbed you, but I didn't mean to scare you. It's just me, Casey. Just Olivia. You're okay... look at me, Casey." She started off strong, but ended pleading.

The ADA slowly looked up to meet Olivia's compassionate eyes, trying to suppress the small tremors that were still making her shake in fear. She knew Olivia was pained by the fact that she had scared her, especially since the detective was paranoid about her genes already... but the moment Olivia grabbed her, the crack of command in her voice, the disappointment and what she apparently had mistook as anger in her eyes... it was just like that night with Charlie.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, once she was convinced Olivia wouldn't hit her. "I-"

"Don't be sorry, Casey. It's okay, really. I should have realized..."

Casey sighed, walking over to the couch and curling up into a tight ball, lying her head on her knees. "It's fine, Liv." Just one more person I've alienated. "I know you didn't mean to." Olivia sat next to her, but didn't reach out to her- it was like she was afraid that she would scare her again. Casey raised her eyes to meet Olivia's as she whispered, "I'm tired of always living like this. Of hating myself whenever someone mentions Charlie."

"So stop."

"It's not that easy," she sighed.

Olivia hesitated before slowly, gingerly, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Casey, you're a different person now. Even though nothing that happened back then is your fault, I fell in love this Casey. Not the one that Charlie abused. You can't change the past, Casey. All that matters is here and now. And all I know for certain is that, here and now, I love you and know what happened wasn't your fault. You didn't kill Charlie... that man wasn't even Charlie anymore. Just a sick man without a sane thought left in his head." Casey shifted over she her head was on Olivia's shoulder, and the detective started stroking her hair lovingly.

The ADA closed her eyes, but it was clear she was not asleep. After a while, she said, "Thanks, Olivia. I.. love you, too." She laid down, resting her head on Olivia's stomach, allowing the detective to comfort her. The warmth radiating off her body was nice. Very nice. It lulled her to sleep, even though it was still early.

Soon they were both asleep, with Casey still lying on top of Olivia and the detective's hand tangled in her hair.

I actually wrote this one before I wrote Past Guilt, but posted that one because it was part of a friendship series. Ah well. And I've already finished 'Raw', I'll be posting it right now.