Chapter 58
Too Late

Under the silver light of the moon, the Merry was bustling with activity as the pirates and the monkey-men were preparing the little sheepy ship for its impending departure. On the deck, footfalls and laughs, yells and hammering resonated from all over in a good prevailing mood, and below, next to the males' quarters, in a dark little room, the silence.

Gently rocked by the slow and regular motion of the waves, two little lanterns cast their light upon a tender scene; a girl was kissing the cheek of her loved one.

Completely dazed by the purity of the moment, she had closed her eyes and, absently, she was now letting her lips caress the warm skin of the young man. Eli had no idea for how long she had been doing this for time had stopped at the moment her full lips came in contact with his freckles. She had no idea of how awake the flame user was and that even before she had allowed herself to act so recklessly. She had no idea that while she kissed his cheek lovingly, Ace was watching her with wide bewildered eyes.

A little delighted sigh blew against his skin and Eli let one of her hands plunge through his hair. Her fingers soaking in the warm mane, they soon matched its high temperature and moved feebly against the young man's heated scalp. Why stop there ? It was so good, and through her enraptured mind, no objection was heard. Soundless, it seemed that all of the voices that were previously quarreling to be heard were now soothed by the flow of entrancing sensations and had fallen asleep.

Eli was kissing him and all the rest had vanished from her mind. She was suspended from time and space, in a vibrant void.

Quietly, the girl felt a touch settling on her, its tender warmth subtly spreading to cover her entirely. A shift, a soft motion, and then the darkness in which she was floating lit up. It was twinkling, brilliant, blinding.

The green eyes snapped open and instantly met with dark ones.

He was awake.

His lips were touching hers and, surely enough, hers were touching his.

Upon that terrible realization, Eli felt a large hand gripping her body, crushing her flesh and bones with a soundless shriek.

A sudden and forceful rush of energy raced under her skin and the girl found herself desperately scrambling away backwards, the skin of her palms burning with the friction against the wooden floor. During her frantic withdrawal, Eli's eyes never left Ace; she didn't even allow herself to blink. In her chest, her heart was exploding over and over again.

Too soon, her back came in contact with a wooden case and fear swept over her.

Petrified, her wide-open eyes were glued on Ace; a dangerous gleam in his magnetic, obsidian orbs, the young man got on his hands and knees and started advancing toward her. Quiet and slow, he looked like a feline on the hunt.

Only a meter was separating them, yet she could have fled. If only her legs hadn't lost the ability to stand upright. Numb, it felt like they had been cut. All that remained of the girl's body was her pained chest where her heart throbbed vociferously.

And Ace was advancing; he was so close, something in his eyes burning her soul.

Slowly, he lifted his hand to her cheek, cupped her face, and brought his closer. And while Eli's heart was drumming on her ribcage, with every beat, Ace's mouth was getting closer to hers.

Staring at the young man's lips, Eli knew she wanted this. Even if Ace didn't share her sentiment, even if it was just a game for him, even if it would only cause her pain... she wanted this.

Then why was she so afraid...?

The fear Eli felt was overwhelming, a fear worse than that of death, a fear with no face, like a memory she couldn't see, like a silent scream. Ace's lips parted as he tilted his head slightly to the side and Eli felt her mouth scorching under his heated breath.

A terror-stricken expression on her face, she forced her eyes shut while desire thudded in her full lips.

Suddenly, the two pirates jerked their heads around to look at the girl's hand as it had gripped the flame user's wrist.

Ace seemed frozen by this sudden grasp. It wasn't strong, though; rather, it was trembling and feeble, almost faint, but his dark eyes widened with dread as he looked at the girl's slender fingers curled around his wrist.

Eli didn't understand her involuntary reaction. She hadn't even felt her arm moving until her skin had come into contact with his. As if it wasn't hers anymore, the girl was bewilderingly staring at her hand, despair washing over her at the impossibility of making the slightest movement.

"... You can't kiss me, Ace."

Through her mind swarming with dismay, she remembered... They had been in the same position three years ago, and like then, she was rejecting him while a voice inside of her was murmuring a terrible scolding.

Kisses are for lovers. You have no right to be loved...

"I'm sorry," Ace said, taking back his hand as Eli turned her head to look at him.

The girl had no idea how she would sound, but she had to say something because it was a misunderstanding.

"No, it's m-"

"I was wrong, I'm sorry." His voice sounded distant and his eyes had lost their glimmering heat.

Ace stood up, towering over her, and while watching him, Eli felt her heart shake with tremors of pain. He was going to leave and she had to stop him because it was just a misunderstanding, things were different from three years ago... She loved him now.

"Don't-"

But Ace kept talking impassibly. "It was all a mistake, you were right."

Maybe he couldn't hear her. Her eyes clinging on his large back, Eli swallowed air and tried again, a bit louder. "Wait, I-"

"You can forget everything now." He was almost at the door. "I won't bother you anymore."

Trying to ignore his grievous words, the girl used her arms for support and stood up. Eli had meant to walk toward him, but her knees were weak and she instead stumbled in his direction, splaying her hands on his back so that she wouldn't fall.

"Don't touch me !" he snarled. The acerbic tone of his voice vibrated under her skin, a shiver racing up her body, causing the horrified girl to jump backward on the spot.

Her fist was clenched to her chest where her heart was racing dangerously and Eli was staring at him with wide, incredulous eyes. Was she... disgusting to him now ?

"Sorry," he said quietly and walked out of the room, pushing the door to a close behind him.

The metallic sound of the latch reached her ears and Eli slid back down onto the floor, her legs overcome by weariness.

With the last remainder of strength she still had, the girl brought her knees to her chest and hugged her legs for comfort. But nothing, nothing, could soothe her distress, and as Ace's words played over and over in her head, Eli shrunk, feeling a sharp blade stabbing her chest with an excruciating regularity.

It was just a misunderstanding... A little mistake...

Eli felt so ugly then, small and insignificant... He was supposed to be her friend, yet Ace had been cruel, and she thought wryly that, after all, it was really just a game for him. Obviously tired of the girl's indecision, the young man had given up on her without giving her a second chance, without giving her an opportunity to explain herself.

And now some dark part of her seemed to try to convince Eli that it was for the best. After all, she wasn't supposed to be loved and to love even less. She didn't know why, though, but the voice inside of her head was unwavering.

Was it because she had already loved before ?

Was it because the very day the one she loved confessed his feelings was also the day she had to bury him along with all of her relatives ?

It had been a while since she had thought about Etowaru. How selfish of her. The young man had gave up his life and saved her. He had given her the life she had because he loved her and now she had forgotten him. Worse, she had dared to love again.

Eli clenched her fists, nails digging into the palm of her hand. Love was supposed to be a good thing, it was supposed to bring happiness to everyone it touched, and she had been happy. She had lived her life without regret... a pirate, proud and strong. She had found friends, even a family. She had gone through wonderful adventures... but then, why was love forbidden to her ?

It felt so unfair.

One of the lanterns' flickering flame extinguished, and more than before, darkness engulfed the girl.

Maybe she just didn't fall for the good one.

Eli turned her head and rested her temple on her knees to look at the remaining flame. It was vacillant, and the shadows it projected were wavering all around her. She felt so alone then. Watching this little flame warmed her heart a bit, though. Even if he had hurt her like no one had ever hurt her before, the girl couldn't ignore the feeling of affection that remained imprinted under her skin.

Was Ace all right ? Was he satisfied with his decision ?

After all, it was not as if he loved her... was it ?

No no no ! Eli shook her head and promptly disregarded that impossibility.

They were friends, good friends, but only friends. They were happy; they had shared some wonderful moments together, and then...

Eli's heart squeezed painfully.

And then, she had tainted his tender friendship with her lust.

Behind her moist orbs, Eli saw the moment she had changed everything. They were in a hotel bedroom on a small and charming island. Sharing the same bed, she was charmed by Ace's warmth and had let her body speak a want she didn't know she had. She had let her hands touch him, caress him, and felt a terrible pleasure when he had returned her gestures.

It was all her fault after all.

Yet she loved him, and now she knew that even then she was in love with him, but her love was just like her, young and inexperienced, and Eli had surrendered the purity of her feelings for a thrilling moment, profaning forever their precious friendship in favor of her obscene impulse.

And now it was too late.

More than before, Eli felt disgusting. She didn't deserve Ace's friendship anymore. She was the initiator of this stupid game she hated so much and was convinced that his withdrawal was definitely for the best.

A sensation akin to comfort lit up inside of her as she concluded that in the end, she wouldn't have to fight her need of him anymore. Ace had made it easy for her; he had even asked her to forget.

But how could she forget now...?

With a deep sigh, Eli reached out to the remaining lantern and turned it off. In the little room, a weak light remained. The girl turned her head in the direction of the door; from its frame, faint rays were piercing through.

Eli rested her chin on her knees and stared at the door. Behind its wood, her life was waiting for her... Then why was it so hard to get up ?

Obviously, it was because somewhere behind that door he would be there, and no matter how much she tried to convince herself that his withdrawal was for the best, Eli couldn't help but wanting to be by his side.

Curling into a tight ball, Eli closed her eyes. She wanted to disappear, sink through the endless darkness with her ache as her sole companion.

"Eli."

Weak protests in the form of muffled mumbles escaped the chronicler's mouth as she rolled on her other side as if to ignore the hyperactive teenager who was trying to get her to open her eyes.

Eli didn't want to wake up, she wanted to sleep forever.

"Eliiiii !"

A finger poked her cheek and Eli tried to stop the annoying strike, waving her hand in a motion that reassembled that of a cow's tail fighting weakly against a swarm of flies.

"Eli wake up !" Luffy said, the tone of his voice not losing an ounce of motivation no matter how unresponsive the girl was. "We're leaving soon."

Leaving...?

Eli opened one eye and winced as she found herself blinded by Luffy's bright grin.

"Sky Island, adventures, they are waiting for us !" Bouncingly, the teen moved around the depressed chronicler causing a slight sensation of vertigo even though she was lying on the floor. "Sanji has prepared food !" he added as if this information was as exciting as the previous, if not more so.

But Eli didn't want to eat, she wanted to starve forever.

"I'm not hungry," she sighed in retreat and rolled on her back while rubbing her heavy eyelids. "I'm coming, you can go." The girl ran her tongue along her teeth, disliking the taste lingering in her mouth.

Luffy nodded and made a motion to walk out of the room before stopping at the door.

"It'll be great, Eli, we're going to touch the clouds." Looking over his shoulder, he beamed at the girl before rushing outside while holding his straw hat.

Eli was surprised to find herself smiling. Was she allowed to smile ? Hands rubbing her face, she washed away the feeble expression and stood up dizzily, holding her head until a small rush of blood faded.

Half-heartedly, she walked to the door while her mind wanted to remain in the little room. Considering her gloomy mood, skulking alone in the darkness seemed like a better fitting activity than sailing into the sky. She didn't even know how she would face her crewmates, especially one of them...

Was she supposed to ignore him now ? Act as if they were complete strangers even though they lived together ?

With a sigh, Eli pushed the door to a close and walked in the direction of the mast to climb up the ladder.

Her head slipping through the hatch, she was welcomed by a fresh breeze along with the bluish light of the morning. Around her, the ship was still buzzing with activity, and once she steadied herself on the deck, Eli saw Usopp, a large grin on his childish face, making a motion with his hand, requesting the girl to join him.

"Look Eli, it's S.S. Forward on its flying mode," the marksman said, pointing at one of the Merry's new wings.

"Nice." Her eyes ran along the ship and soon met with a familiar figure. The sight of Ace making her heartbeat increase in both volume and rhythm, she quickly turned her head to look at the long-nosed teenager again. "Really nice." Eli forced a smile on her face, and Usopp smiled back.

"Ace-"

Her heart squeezed slightly at the mention of the name.

"-is giving it the final touch and then we'll be good to go," he said.

The marksman seemed so enthusiastic. Wasn't he scared of flying into the sky ?

After reconsideration and a quick observation, every pirate seemed to be exceptionally lively, except for Sanji who was whimpering in a corner of the deck, and Zoro who was as detached and grumpy as usual.

And Ace, of course...

Warm goodbyes were given to Montblanc and the monkey-men offered to join the pirates to their takeoff location. Luffy's cries of joy filled the morning air and, happily, the Straw Hats prepared the little ship to sail.

Eli's anguish didn't seem to go unnoticed as, not so subtly, her crewmates were cheerfully talking to her, smiling at her. The chronicler only felt more and more pitiful then, and her act seemed so eager to fall apart, so she forced herself to smile, she even forced herself to laugh, but once she was left alone, her eyes wanted to roll in Ace's direction.

The young man was fixing some parts to the Merry figurehead. Useless, but cute nevertheless; the sheep head was now equipped with a comb and a wattle making it look like a turkey.

Her eyes shifting from his task to the young man himself, Eli found herself smiling. He was rubbing his eye. It was simple, insignificant, but the sight of the flame user rubbing his eye in such a childish manner warmed up her heart.

He yawned and the girl found him cute.

Eli was so deeply charmed by those juvenile gestures that she was extremely surprised to find herself, a split second later, leaning over the railing while holding the young man by the wrist a few meters above the water.

Apparently, he had been struck by a narcoleptic fit and slipped from the figurehead.

Her reflexes were fast enough and she had managed to arrive just in time to catch him, but it was useless, she should have known. The young man weighed at least three times heavier than her and she wasn't strong enough to prevent his fated fall.

Ace's head snapped upward, his eyes widening as he watched the girl trying to hold him with all of her might and strength.

"Let go, idiot !" he ordered, a glare on his face.

Eli winced feeling her muscles flinching. Her free hand clawed to the railing, a burning sensation spread from her fingers throughout her arm; she should let go. The water wasn't far below and all over the ship, good swimmers could rescue the flame user within the minute. The girl knew that she should let go; her reason was yelling at her to let go.

But Eli couldn't let go.

"I can't !" Eli whined, fighting futilely against the force that was pulling her overboard as well.

She would be falling, too, she knew it, but she couldn't let go, or maybe... maybe she didn't want to let go.

"I won't," Eli corrected, shaking her head as she did.

The girl was looking deeply into his dark, bewildered eyes, a determined expression on her face to make sure Ace would understand that she wasn't planning on letting him go, not that easily, not ever.

"I won't let you go, Ace."

Eli knew that she wasn't talking about his fall, and as they plummeted toward the sea, her fingers still tightly curled around his wrist, she wondered if he knew, too.

The two pirates crashed into the salty water, cold enveloping them on the spot, and Eli limply slid her fingers in between his. Feeling all of her strength leaving her body at an amazing speed, she gave a faint kick to propel her body in his direction while Ace was looking at her. The girl had no idea what to think of his expression; surprise, shock, fear...?

But she wouldn't let go.

Love was forbidden for her ? And ? Nothing was forbidden for a pirate, and because she was a pirate, just like two boys taught her years ago, she would live her life freer than anyone, without regrets.

A brilliant sensation akin to hope fluttering softly inside of her, Eli knew that it wasn't too late. The mistakes she had made, she could erase. His harsh words, his coldness, she forgave them all. It wasn't too late. They could try again. Maybe Ace didn't love her, but he said he liked her, he said she was pretty, they were good with each other...

She hadn't fallen for the wrong one, and so she will never let him go.

Loosely, Eli wrapped her free arm around Ace's neck and pulled herself a bit closer to him.

She heard splashing sounds from above her, but it wasn't the prospect of her future rescue that was warming the girl's heart; she was smiling at the man she loved, and amazingly, he was smiling back at her.

to be continued

Betaed by Iwin Ulose. (yup, he's back to help me for a few chapters since my current beta is busy)

Hi Hikari No Kaze and MangaMagic guessed that Ace was faking his sleep. *clap clap*
Many of you guessed or/and hoped that Ace would kiss Eli back, but I'm not sure you were expecting things to go so wrong.

The first part was really distressing (for both Eli and I... for you as well ?), but then, Luffy's grin and after that, hope.

:)

See you soon for the next 'Freckles' or a trip in Ace's mind if I manage to right the 'Twig' counterpart (I'm not sure).