A/N: Hope everyone is enjoying the summer! I appreciate all the feedback and the ideas! Claralynn there are some special moments in here for you!
SM owns twilight
Chapter 16 – Wonder Woman and Whackos
"Hey, Edward," I spoke excitedly.
He's really back. He's at my door!
"Whats up, Edward?" Alice chimed in from behind me.
Rio wagged his nub and pranced in circles, causing Edward to smile again.
"Evening, ladies. Hey, big guy, what's shaking, besides you?" he asked Rio.
Rio took it up a notch for more attention. He began his Boxer speak, which came out sounding like something between a bark and a howl. Edward reached over and handed him a treat from his coat pocket in return.
"Wow. Are you always prepared?" I asked.
"Usually. I'm a regular boy scout, Bella." He winked.
I shook my head, smiling in joyful disbelief.
"You just got back? How was your trip? You want something to eat?" Lil' firecracker asked in rapid succession.
Slow down there Starsky.
Alice always ran on hypomania from what I could gather, but Edward didn't seem to mind the interrogation. In fact, he seemed almost chipper. "Yes. Boring. And I'm not sure. What's there to eat?"
What? He's staying?
"Reubens," I stammered, "We made Reubens. Would you like one?"
"Sure. I love those. That would be great." Edward smiled again, walking into the living room while looking around observantly.
Is this invasion of the body snatchers?
"Um…okay, make yourself comfortable." I certainly wasn't comfortable. This new BlueEyes had me confused and scrambling to comprehend what caused this latest change of behavior. Not that I wanted to complain!
Edward raised his eyebrows in a boyish grin as he took off his jacket, sitting in the armchair across from Alice. It seemed as if he was enjoying the shock on my face. Rio trotted over with one of his favorite toys and sat beside Edward's feet, chewing on it happily. The scene was very surreal, but he had never seemed so relaxed.
Standing at the kitchen counter I made BlueEyes a sandwich, watching him roll up his sleeves as he joked with Alice. I concentrated on not cutting myself with the knife, but I kept looking up to see him glancing in my direction.
God he looks good in my house, in my chair!
Alice avoided the topic of Tanya or even the premise of his trip to Canada, and I was thankful. I didn't want to ruin the change in mood or the scenery. Finishing the most painstaking Reuben sandwich of my life, I froze.
What does he want to drink?
I know he likes bee, but I don't have any! Crap!
"Edward, what would you like to drink?" I asked.
"What do you have?" his voice mesmerized me.
"Water, milk, juice and Dr. Pepper," I managed. His continuous smile was making me blush; I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks.
"A Dr. Pepper would be great," Edward answered.
Finding him a cold drink from the fridge, I walked over and handed Edward the plate. When our hands touched, a spark of electricity shocked us both. It tingled up my arm.
I grabbed my hand reflexively, rubbing it in response. "Ouch!"
"Gotta love static!" Alice giggled. "Well peeps, I think I'm going to head out now."
She stood up, obviously trying to assist me in Operation Bang Blue Eyes.
"What?" We both questioned at the same time. Edward grinned at me in some shy form of camaraderie. Although I was thrilled he was here, the newness of the situation made me apprehensive.
Edward didn't seem prepared for one on one time either. That much was apparent, and at least familiar.
"Or not?"Alice counter-offered, sitting back down.
"Already I mean? I just got here. But I guess Bella has probably filled you in on the fall of Creepo?" Edward taunted.
"What?" Alice shouted. "No! She didn't mention anything. Did something happen with James?"
"Well apparently he showed his ass, literally." Edward smirked as he took a bite of the Rueben. A small drop of mustard remained on his bottom lip as he chewed.
C'mon, just stick your tongue out and lick it, please.
The bouncing of an excited Alice on the couch cushions interrupted my moment. It caused me to moan out loud.
"Bella? Was it bad? Are you ok?" She asked in concern.
Edward watched me as well. There was a puzzled look on his face. He didn't stop eating though, which made it even more difficult for me to regain my composure.
Lip porn.
"Bella?" Alice asked again.
"Oh, yeah. No, It was great actually, I was just…"
Sigh.
Earth to Bella!
I finally focused. "Let's see, oh yes! James. Well, after I talked with you yesterday I decided to go to the office and try to catch up on work. Carlisle was there, and we ran into each other, and started talking…"
Alice and Edward listened attentively while I described the events in detail, even down to James' huge nasty mole on his right buttock. When I finished, they sat in silence before abruptly bursting into fits of laughter.
"No way! Karma is a bitch!" Edward laughed.
"Ramona is the bitch!" Alice giggled in return. "To be honest, I can't believe it wasn't Megan, the other night nurse. Everyone knows she's willing to put out with any doctor who will give her the time of day. I bet he's doing them both!"
"Megan is kind of hot," Edward teased.
"Ugh!" Alice screamed. "Yeah, if you like plastic."
"And the brains of a banana slug." I added.
"I didn't say I'd be talking to her." Edward shrugged, receiving more moans from the both of us.
"Anyway, what's going to happen now? Did Carlisle say?" Alice continued.
"No, he just asked me if I could handle the entire census for a while. He's going to meet with both of them first thing tomorrow morning."
"You can handle it," Edward affirmed. His tone was serious.
"Yeah, I suppose. It would be great to have another competent psychiatrist to work with though, not some idiot for brains. Carlisle said he would start recruiting again as soon as possible."
"Well, you'll just have to handle it all, wonder-woman! Plus you have your trusty side-kick, me!" Alice responded quickly, bear hugging me on the couch.
"Ooh! You're my Etta Candy? I suppose you want to borrow my invisible plane?"
"Just call me Candy Buns!" Alice giggled. "And I'd rather have the golden bracelets."
"No one touches my bracelets, chica. You'll have a pissed superhero on your hands." I laughed.
"Wow. I feel left out." Edward pouted.
"What? Wow, look at that pitiful face Bella! Such a sad Steve Trevor." Alice pointed at Edward.
"It looks like a face I used to make for more of my mom's spaghetti," I added.
"Spaghetti face! Yes! That's the one. Make it again, Edward, just like we're six years old again and Esme won't give you seconds!" Alice ramped up the joking.
"No way. Besides, it was lasagna. That's so much better than the spaghetti face. Plus, I don't want to be Steve! I deserve superhero status!" Edward argued.
"Like who? Superman, or Batman maybe? What will it be, Clark, or is it Bruce?" I asked.
"Cyclops! I'll be Scott Summers!"
"Whoa. You can't switch from the Justice League to X-men!" I explained.
"Yes I can. The Justice League is lame compared to X-men!" he fought back.
"You can't be serious." I was enjoying the banter.
"Um, yeah, everyone knows that, Bella." He rolled his eyes.
"If we're doing X-men, I wanna be Storm! I could at least have my hair perfect all the time by controlling the weather." Alice added, but she was not really invested in the argument.
"Fine!" I laughed. "I'll need all the help I can get over the next few weeks, especially if Creepo gets officially canned tomorrow. I guess second tier superheroes will have to do. "
Edward crossed his arms in defiance before Alice slapped him on the arm, starting a playful struggle of wrestling between the two of them. I cleaned up the kitchen listening to Edward and Alice share the stories of their many childhood schemes. It was the most fun I had enjoyed since arriving. Although the night was winding down, I never wanted it to end.
"Those weren't even the best moments for Alice! If Jasper were here he could tell you all about it. Those two were glued at the hip growing up." Edward explained.
I glanced over at Alice in a mischievous way, which caused Edward to pick up on it immediately.
"Whoa. What else have I missed? Something finally happen with you and Jas?" he asked.
"What? Nothing!" Alice exclaimed, hopping off the barstool. "Time to go now, goodnight, Bella. Let's go, Edward!" She pulled him by the arm towards the door.
"What? No way!" He laughed.
"Yes, Edward! It's late!" she insisted.
He looked back at me as I zipped my mouth with an imaginary zipper. That caused him to give me the pouty face while Alice pushed him outside.
She ran back in to kiss me on the cheek, whispering in my ear. "That's the Edward I remember. Thanks for bringing him back!"
Me? I'm not sure I did anything. But God he's even hotter when he's happy.
I took Rio outside and made a mad dash to the shower, brushing my teeth and changing into my big Kitty tee as quickly as possible. I logged on to my computer quickly, excited to see if Edward was waiting.
[E Cullen is online.]
[B: Hey!]
[E: Sup!]
[B: LOL, nothing much since you left 15 minutes ago.]
[E: Well it took you long enough.]
[B: Are you serious? I had to shower.]
[E: Lame.]
[B: I'm assuming you didn't.]
[E: Shower? No. I like to be a little dirty. ;)]
[B: Haha. That's the second time you've said I was lame tonight, by the way.]
[E: I didn't call YOU lame- I said taking a shower was, instead of talking to me.]
[B: And you called the Justice League lame.]
[E: Compared to XMen? Um…yeah.]
[B: Whatever! Wonder woman had awesome skills.]
[E: Like?]
[B: Well, her truth lasso for one! It could come in handy.]
[E: Lmao. The truth lasso- That has a length of like what, 20 feet?]
[B: Very funny.]
[E: You'd be like, stop! Come back! Wait 'til i get you with my truth lasso!]
[B: It stretches.]
[E: Oh, so it's a bungee lasso?]
[B: LOL, Blah! It was made by Aphrodite, especially for Wonder Woman!]
[E: I bet Aphrodite was using it as a Sex swing?]
[B: ROTFL…Um…I don't think so.]
What's a sex swing? Don't ask him! Google it later!
[E: The reason bad guys tell the truth so fast is they don't want the STDs it carries.]
[B: LMAO...Fine! I'll just ding you with my golden tiara.]
[E: Yeah that might give me a slight headache as I zap u with my solar optics, nice try.]
[B: Well, show off, who would you suggest for me then?]
[E: Jean Gray.]
[B: Xmen again, huh? She and Cyclops got it on right?]
[E: Yeah. Jean is hawt!]
[B: Wonder woman could talk to animals.]
[E: Jean can read minds, use telekinesis, and control matter.]
[B: Hmm. Reading minds could be helpful.]
Like reading yours.
[E: See! And I imagine it's easier than a bungee lasso.]
[B: OMG. Haha. You win! You gonna let me read your mind?]
[E: What would do you want to know?]
Ooh. Hard one. So many questions. Most of which he probably won't answer.
[B: For starters? Favorite color?]
[E: Green. Yours?]
[B: Same.]
[E: Hmm, copycat.]
[B: Favorite Ice cream?]
[E: Cherries Jubilee.]
[B: Mine's Coffee. What's your favorite music/song?]
[E: Wow. There are so many. You just jump right in on the hard questions, huh?]
[B: Haha. Ok. What caused you to show up at my door tonight?]
[E: I was wondering when you'd ask. I saw Alice was there through the window.]
Huh? He was there to see Alice?
[B: I see.]
[E: I'm sure you don't see, Jean Gray. Your powers aren't matured.]
[B: Enlighten me, then.]
[E: I wanted to talk to you right away. I planned to email, but when I saw Alice was visiting I felt more comfortable just stopping by.]
[B: Oh.]
[E: Sigh. And I was going to call you earlier, Bella, but my blackberry was stolen.]
[B: What? When did that happen?]
[E: I had it in my carry-on and left it at the bell-hop for just a moment, going across the street to grab a coffee and Danish. When I reclaimed my bag it was gone.]
[B: Did you report it to the management? That's awful!]
[E: Yeah, but the concierge states he didn't see anyone go near the desk. Maybe I was mistaken and left it in the room. Anyway…]
[B: That still sucks.]
[E: Bella.]
[B: Yes?]
[E: You were right.]
[B: I was? The concierge found it?]
[E: Haha. No, Bella. You were right about me.]
[B: Oh.]
Which part? Ugh, I hate when he's cryptic. That's all the time. I know!
[E: Some problems aren't solvable.]
Ahh.
[B: I know.]
[E: I couldn't handle the fact that I didn't 'solve' Tanya's problems, or fix the devastation her illness caused everyone involved.]
[B: Did they find her?]
[E: No.]
[B: Oh. Well are you going to keep trying to help?]
[E: No, Bella. I told them I wasn't able to any longer. The doctors and her family were all very supportive. They thanked me for everything I had done through the years, which was basically nothing.]
[B: That's not true.]
[E: Well it didn't make things any better. But they actually understood my need to move on…]
[B: What do you think happened to her?]
[E: I'm not sure. She was so confused and paranoid the last time I saw her. There's a large homeless population in Vancouver, I imagine they will eventually find her at one of the shelters. ]
[B: I'm sorry, Edward.]
[E: Me too. But I'm tired of being trapped in the past. I don't want to be a negative narcissist.]
[B: LOL. That really bothered you when I said that, huh?]
[E: Yes. And I'm tired of hurting my family, my friends, and you.]
[B: You make me happy.]
[E: But I hurt you too. And I'm sorry. I want to give you more.]
[B: I want more.]
[E: I know. Believe me-LOL. But I won't risk hurting you by jumping right into something we're not ready for.]
[B: I'm ready.]
[E: Haha. I haven't had any relationship in years, Bella, with anyone. Let alone a romantic one.]
[B: So. I've never had a real relationship, Edward, except one, and it was for convenience.]
[E: Really?]
[B:Yes.]
[E: Was that Sean?]
[B: What? How do you know about him?]
[E: Alice. And I did my snooping when you went back to Arizona.]
[B: Wow.]
[E: I'm not a stalker.]
[B: Haha. No, I'm just stunned you cared enough to research my past ships.]
[E: I thought you said there was only one?]
[B: It was a figure of speech.]
[E: Sure.]
[B: So.]
[E: So.]
[B: What are you saying, exactly?]
[E: You need it all spelled out huh?]
[B: Yes.]
[E: I wanna be your boyfriend, Bella, but I'd like to be your friend, first?]
Squeal!
[B: Um...I'll think about it.]
[E: What!]
[B: Lmao. Well of course I'll be your friend, Edward. But you'll have to be nicer to be my boyfriend. You've tortured me for a while now.]
[E: I see. How much nicer?]
[B: I'll let you know…night, BlueEyes!]
[E: You're leaving?]
[B: Yes. I need to start early tomorrow if I'm picking up all the patient cases…]
[E: Oh yeah. Oh! I'm seeing Ms. Hiller again tomorrow. Can I stop by so we can review her progress?]
[B: Please. Stop by anytime, Edward.]
[E: Goodnight, Beautiful Bella.]
[B: Goodnight.]
I ran out of the cottage at 7:30 a.m., wishing I had set my alarm for an hour earlier. My hair was a tousled mess, and my scrunchie didn't work wonders in taming it. Making matters worse, the car door snagged my skirt on the ride into the Retreat, which I noticed only after arriving for work.
Great Bella. Must you always look like you live in a gutter?
Returning back home to change was out of the question, knowing I had double the work in store for today. I brushed out the wrinkles ineffectively, chastising myself once again for sleeping in.
If you didn't stay up all night you would be rested.
Just as I walked up the front steps of the main building, Ramona came bursting out the entrance, nearly knocking me over. I stumbled against the wrought iron railing, surprised at myself for not falling to the ground.
"Oh, Dr. Swan! I'm sorry," she blurted.
"It's fine, Ramona."
"No. I'm truly sorry. I can't believe I was so foolish. I've never been more embarrassed in my life. We may never see each other again, but I hope you can forgive me for my selfish and irresponsible behavior."
"It's not for me to judge you, or forgive you, Ramona. So you're leaving?"
"Thanks. Yes, I turned in my resignation just now. Goodbye, Dr. Swan"
"Goodbye, Ramona."
She continued down the cobbled walkway with tears staining her cheeks. I truly felt bad for her, imagining that James' sociopathic behavior was what charmed her into such a stupid decision.
Speak of the devil.
"Hello, Bella." Turning around, I came face to face with a smiling Creepo. One would have thought he had won the lottery. My mind raced, wondering if Carlisle had given him a reprieve or if he was indeed fired.
"James," I replied, begrudgingly.
"I'm sorry we didn't get to know each other better while working so closely." His smirk remained in place.
Whew. He was canned. Thank God!
"So, you're leaving?"
"Of course. Isn't that what you wanted?" he asked.
"What?" I was confused.
"I know you brought Carlisle by there to catch me, Bella. You may think I'm the one fooling people, but you don't have me fooled." He was smiling, but it felt more threatening the longer we stood there. I suddenly felt the hairs on the back of my neck raise, and the pit of my stomach form knots. These internal warning instincts always kept me out of harm's way during training when patients were aggressive.
So he heard me tell Carlisle what I thought of him that night.
Does it matter?
Yes! Well, he's obviously unstable!
I took a step back for more personal space. "I had no idea you would be there, James."
"Oh, right. You just happened to stop by there on a Saturday night? With the director of the hospital? You've been watching me, obviously. Is that why you wouldn't meet with me? Because you were jealous of the others?" he continued.
So there was more than one.
"As usual, I have no idea what you're talking about," I explained.
James took a step to close the distance, whispering as he leaned in, "You know you do, Bel. And if you wanted me to yourself all you had to do was ask. Now it's going to be even harder to be together when I don't work here."
Oh my God! Why do I attract these Whackos!
"I don't want to be with you, James." I gritted my teeth.
He finally frowned. "So you got me fired for nothing?"
The bizarreness and frustration of the conversation kept mounting, and the more I tried to maintain composure the more he attempted to push my buttons. His words were laced with anger, causing me more concern.
"I'm going in now, James. I had nothing to do with your behaviors, or their consequences."
I felt myself trembling as I walked into the building, a mixture of both fear and anger boiling in my blood.
"Fine for now, Bel," he yelled out after me as the doors started to close.
Before I was out of hearing, his last words registered in the air. "But you know we'll be together one day!"
A/N: Reviews will leave BlueEyes on your doorstep, wrapped in a golden lasso, and nothing else!