Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who's still reading this even though Graceland is currently on break. I'm super impressed with you all putting up with me. I swear there's an end in sight.
"Where are you going?" Mike murmers sleepily as Paige tries to slide out of bed without him noticing.
"I should go back to my room before everyone's up. So no one catches us." She whispers quietly, looking around the room for her undergarments. At this point she's grateful Mike left her dress on so she can leave quicker.
"Paige, we've been sleeping together for over a month. They all know. Come back to bed." Mike grumbles, his arm tiredly reaching out to pull the blankets back for her.
"Yes, but it's always just sleeping… we've never actually slept together!" She says in an urgent whisper, even though she doesn't know why she's whispering. The walls aren't THAT thin. She hopes.
"And you think they're going to know just from looking at us?" Mike asks incredulously, sitting up in bed. Paige looks over at his mussed up hair, swollen lips and shirtless chest. She certainly knows they just had sex. Everything about him screams that he'd just spent the night vigorously fucking. He looks like sex personified, tempting her to come back to bed and try it again.
"It's easier this way. I just don't want them to get the wrong idea." Paige averts her eyes from Mike, barely covered by a sheet, and begins scanning the room for her underwear again.
"And what idea is that exactly?" Mike sleepily runs a hand through his hair. She finds her panties in a pile with Mike's shirt and slips them on, using them as an excuse not to look back up at Mike and his very naked body. She feels like her whole world has been flipped upside down and he can't even bother to wake up.
"That we're having sex." Paige whispers, still refusing to make eye contact. She feels stupid when he makes her say the words. She's not even sure that's what they're doing. Was this just a one time thing, or did Mike think they were in a relationship now or something? The lines were so blurred.
"Paige, they've had that idea since I got here. Besides, now we actually had sex, so what's the problem?" Mike is failing to see what's so urgent she has to leave now.
Mike's use of the term 'had sex' rather than 'having sex' is not lost on Paige. He clearly thinks of this as a one time thing, an indulgence that he gave her. It only fuels her desire to flee his room.
Quite frankly, Paige is embarrassed. She wanted to just slip away back to her room, but he had woken up. She wanted to be alone, to sort out what this all meant. She had always been curious what Mike would be like in bed, ever since he got to Graceland. As the two of them got closer it had gone past a mere curiosity, she would constantly find herself thinking about what sex with him would be like. Now that it had actually happened, she just felt confused.
Somehow she felt further away from him than ever. The calculated controlled way he had sex with her felt like it was his duty. Not that he was bad. It was easily the most intense orgasm she'd ever had in her life. Considering it was there first time together, and first times generally suck, she could only imagine what she was in for if they continued… whatever this was. But as good as it had been for her, she was sincerely bothered by the fact that it wasn't as good for Mike. Paige was great in bed. Her partners always came without fail, usually more than once. But with Mike, she had literally broken apart, out of control, in front of him, the most vulnerable moment of her entire life, and he hadn't even orgasmed.
Paige knows it meant more for her than it did for him, and she is not comfortable being the emotionally needy one. She never has been, and she never will be. Men always fall harder for her than she does for them, and she likes it that way. She needs time away from him to think about it. To pull herself together and put her walls back up. To get back to her old self reliant, fun loving happy had it together self. This depressed needy crazy girl who needed a man to feel alive was not her. She would not allow Mike to carry her burdens. She doesn't want him pitying her. Maybe once she had it all together again, then she could be with Mike, but right now she needs distance to sort it out.
Her silence has Mike bothered, and his eyes travel up and down her body in the dark, looking for clues. "What's wrong, Paige?"
"We always sleep in my room, not yours. They'll know." Paige finally argues, as if this makes perfect sense and explains everything. It's a weak excuse and she knows it, but her mind is somewhere else and all she knows is she needs to get out of here.
"Fine." Mike groans, throwing the sheet off his naked body and rolling out of bed. Paige doesn't know why the sight makes her blush. Mike is right. They did have sex. She saw all of this last night, but something about the way he seems so comfortable in the nude around her without an erection seems strangely intimate. Mike grumbles as he finds his underwear and pulls them on. "Let's go to your room."
"You're coming too?" Paige is surprised.
"Paige, what's going on? Do you not want me to come? I sleep with you every night." Mike says, getting frustrated with her. It's the middle of the night, and she's acting strangely. She's distancing herself from him again. He can feel it.
"We haven't the last few nights." Paige reminds him. What she said was true, but he thought they were past that.
"The last few nights have sucked." Mike says bluntly, "C'mon. It's late and I want to go to sleep. Now either tell me what's wrong, or get back in bed."
"It's fine. I just don't want to deal with any more house drama right now." Paige lies.
"No one will care. Hell, Charlie will probably bake us a cake." Mike assures her, putting his hands comfortingly on her arms, wishing she would look at him so he could read her eyes.
Mike is starting to wake up now. He knows he does not want to go back to seperate beds. These last few days sleeping alone, with an uncomfortable tension with Paige, had put a strain on Mike. After last night, Mike thought maybe all their issues would be solved. He slept with her. Isn't that what the whole problem had been? That they'd been too emotionally intimate without the physical? Isn't it what she wanted? If the problem had been sex, as Paige said it was, why wasn't everything fixed now?
"I just can't deal with it right now, Mike." She says quietly, looking down at the ground.
"Is everything ok? You were really shaken up when you came home tonight. What's going on?" Mike is nervous, his mind desperately combing over every detail trying to discover what has her so upset. He'd been so careful with her, but maybe it wasn't enough. Maybe she no longer felt safe around him. Maybe he'd just fucked up the best thing in his life by sleeping with her. He didn't know how they could come back from this. When she remains silent, he grimaces. "Look, let's just take it one thing at a time. Don't worry about what the other's will think. We can sleep in your room if you're more comfortable. Let's just go to sleep."
"Mike, you don't have to do this." Paige says softly, walking towards the door.
"Do what?" Mike takes two hesitant steps following her.
"This. You don't have to come, take care of me or anything. You're already half asleep. Just go back to bed. I'm just going down the hall. I'll be fine." Paige awkwardly backs away from him towards the door. "I'll see you in the morning."
"Ok…" Mike says cautiously, now fully awake from her rebuke and trying to decipher her strange behavior. He walks over and leans down to kiss her but she turns her head to the side and he ends up kissing her cheek. A panic fills him, and he knows he won't sleep tonight, but he tries to keep it hidden from her. He looks at her curiously, trying to see what is going on in her mind. "I guess I'll see you in the morning then."
"Yeah… See you." She echos back, before slipping out the door closing it behind her.
Mike groans in frustration as the door closes behind her. He silently curses, pacing around the room, before just giving up and faceplanting onto his messy bed. Even though sleep doesn't come, he doesn't have the energy to move until long after the sun shines in the windows.