AN: I've been severely lacking in inspiration for the past few…(oops)…years. I was more distracted than anything else. When my heart is beating my mind stalls. When it stops, anything is possible. Inspiration: Matchbox Twenty – Rest Stop

Chapter 5: What is this feeling inside of me?

Albus Dumbledore made his way to the first floor of Grimmauld Place after leaving the room of it most recent owner. He knew that it would change hands again in the near future and wondered who it would pass to then. He heard motion ahead and looked to the stairs from the underground kitchen.

'Ah,' he thought, 'the young Ms. Granger and Mr. Weasley. Such loyal friends, if only Harry had the time to realize how much they truly cared for him…'

(Hermione Granger)

Hermione stopped when she saw Professor Dumbledore coming down the stairs. She desperately wanted to know how her friend was doing but held her composure until he reached them.

"Professor Dumbledore," she said, "How is Harry? Can we see him? Is he going to be okay?"

(Ron Weasley)

Ron stopped beside Hermione and waited on the Headmaster to come down the stairs. Being the friend of Harry Potter had shown him that fame was nothing compared to a person's character. It was who they were inside that truly mattered. He would be the first to admit that he wasn't exactly blessed with intelligence but he could see that something was bothering the man that he had grown to admire not because his past accomplishments but who he was now and how he tried to help those in need.

(Albus Dumbledore)

Headmaster Dumbledore saw the desperation on the young woman's face and the loyalty on the young man's. Through all of his century plus life he had held onto that last hope that good always triumphs, people are inherently good, that innocence still exists in the world, and one look at the children's faces and he lost that hope.

'I caused this,' he thought, 'MY inaction did this…My cowardice…'

(Hermione Granger)

The old man's eyes met her for a moment and her breath caught in her throat. She could see something broken behind those twinkles blue eyes.

"Give him time," she vaguely heard him say, barely above a whisper. She watched him walk to the door, open it, and close it softly behind him. Ron passed by her, heading towards the stairs.

A sonic boom came from outside the closed door. She heard Ron nock on the master's suite. 'Harry's new room,' passed through her mind.

Ron was still knocking when her gaze broke from the door leading outside. A tear slid down her face as she slowly sank to the floor.

(Two Hours Later, Approximately 4:00 AM)

The residents of 12 Grimmauld Place had settled in after their late night. Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had moved in after deciding that the Burrow was to big of a risk to live in and were now in their room in a fitful sleep. Ron was in the same room that he had shared with Harry last summer. After an hour of staring at the bed that Harry once slept in he managed to fall into a light slumber.

Hermione was still at the bottom of the stairs. After numerous attempts of trying to get her to go to bed the Weasleys finally gave up and left her to her thoughts. She had barely moved since the Headmaster left.

She was hugging her knees to her chest with her head resting lightly on them. Hermione feared for the life of her first real friend. The way that Professor Dumbledore left had pushed her mind into overdrive. Only something terrible could upset him so and she feared for the worse.

Just as she was about to enter the realm of nightmares the soft sound of a door opening reached her ears. Somehow she knew it was him. As quietly as she could, Hermione pulled herself up. He hadn't come down the stairs so there were three places that he could be: the bathroom, the attic, or the library. She knew he wouldn't disturb anyone especially after the way that he locked himself in his room and wouldn't let anyone in.

When she reached the second floor it was empty. She lightly rapped on the bathroom door. No answer. The knob turned. It was empty. The attic door opened with a light creep and she began to ascend. It didn't look as if anyone had been in recently. Her suspicions were confirmed. There was only Buckbeek sleeping in a corner.

Going back down she heard a thump from where the library was. She opened the door and saw him disappear behind a shelf.

"Harry?" she asked. Closing the door behind her, Hermione moved into the room. In the furthest corner he was scanning the shelves.

"I…I want to be alone," came his soft reply. "Please…just whatever it is…I want to be alone…" His hand shook as he reached above his head for a book. He heard her sniff and knew she was trying not to cry.

"Please…" he choked out.

She began to tremble. "How bad is it?" came her soft reply. His arm and head dropped.

"Curse," he whispered.

She let out a soft sob and moved towards him. Harry turned to face her. Hermione pulled him into a hug and held him tight.

"Class one," he continued as he wrapped his arms around her. She began to tremble in his arms.

"How long?" she asked through her tears. He took a deep breath and squeezed her tighter.

"A year…maybe…I don't really know…"

"I'll do everything that I can," she said. "You've saved me more times that I care to think about. I'll do everything that I can to save you."

"You can't," came his reply. "Not even Dumbledore can." She pulled away from him.

"You have done more for me than you can imagine, Harry Potter," she exclaimed. "You saved me from a troll, stayed with me when I was petrified…we've been through so much together, but what really matters to me is that a little boy in his first year at Hogwarts gave me his friendship. He was my first true friend and I will do anything for him. Even if it means doing something that the books say is impossible."

He gave her a week smile and pulled her in for another hug. As he pulled away he whispered in her ear, "Phasmatis intus perussi vestry."

She froze. From this day forward she knew without a doubt that he would not let her save him. He couldn't.

Harry quickly located the book that he was searching for, grabbed it, and left the room.

Hermione resisted the temptation to be sick and sat down at the table in the middle of the room.

(Nymphadora Tonks)

Nymphadora Tonks had been released from duty moments ago. Her superiors had set her on guard duty at a suspected dark wizard's hideout early the morning of the attack on Privet Drive and she had left her post to help the Order. She had been put on desk duty pending an investigation. An investigation into the dereliction of duty which had come to a conclusion not less than an hour ago, with her expulsion from the Aurors.

This charge could have gotten her a hefty fine and a stint in Azkaban if she hadn't of been so well decorated. She was fresh from the recruits and had worked more cases than half the department combined, but now she would be lucky to find a job anywhere in the wizarding world.

Tonks let herself into the house just in time to walk halfway up the stair to see Harry walk out of the library. She stopped and watched the troubled youth shut the door and walk back to his new room. He looked once more to the library and shut himself away again.

In her desk she had kept a bottle of Odgen's Finest to celebrate her accomplishments with a shot. In the fifteen minutes that it took her to clean out her desk a forth of the bottle had disappeared.

Tonks gripped the shoulder strap to her pack in one hand and the half-empty whisky in the other and made her way up the stairs. She passed by Harry's room with a glance but left him alone. With the shit that he had been through she knew that she would want to be left alone too. So she made her way to the library.

Opening the door, she spied Hermione Granger with her head on the reading table. "Hmm…," she unknowingly said to herself. "Lover's quh…quh…quarrel? Such a shame, they look good together. Oh well," she uncorked the bottle and took a big gulp.

"Least I know I'm not the only one being buggered in the rump. Then again those adorable green eyes." Another big drink was taken. "Your cute to little missy. They always say it's the quiet ones you got to look out for. Nope, definitely wouldn't mind being thrown in bed between these two," she began to giggle. "Ah well, lass," she sighed. "Least' I can dream. Just hope you leave me here when I wake up." She re-corked the bottle, shut the door, and promptly passed out face first on the library floor.

(Hermione Granger)

Hermione was about to raise her head to see who had entered the library when she heard Tonks talking to herself. Deciding that in her current state she really didn't feel like dealing with the usually chipper girl, she pretended to sleep.

She couldn't keep the blush off of her face when she heard the obviously smashed Auror mumbling about a ménage a trios with her and a certain raven haired wizard.

Hermione decided that she would indeed leave the young woman there but she made her a little more comfortable with a few flicks of her wand.

With a sigh she rose from her chair. She had made a promise to Harry and she had work to do. Taking one more glance at the drunken woman on the floor, Hermione began to pull every book about dark arts, arithmancy, and anything else that appeared promising to her clever mind, off the shelf.

When she was satisfied with her current load, she sat at the table. With a guilty look at the pile of books, Hermione rose once more and swiftly pulled the bottle from the unconscious woman's hands.

She took a light sip and her eyes brightened a little. "Not as bad as I thought," she said as she regained her seat and placed the bottle beside her books.