11.

Carlisle took Edward and Jasper with him the next day. They were going to go to our old house and to John's work to find him. I had begged them to tell me if he had moved on, if there was any sort of hopelessness to the cause of meeting him face-to-face.

The whole day, as I waited for their return, I could not stay still. Alice tried to engage me. She suggested makeovers of hair and make-up and even hosting a little fashion show. She begged me to dance with her, but I couldn't do anything right because my brain was so distracted. Renesme pulled me to the piano and played a few songs for me, though when I tried to play, I couldn't concentrate on the sheets of music in front of me. We sang a few songs together, but I grew restless quickly. Bella asked me if I wanted to come to her dad's house for a visit, but I declined, knowing I would be a mess, and wanting to stay here unless there was any news or they came back.

I apologized to everyone profusely that day, as I stumbled about, pacing and wringing my hands. Finally Emmett walked up to me, wrapped his giant arms around me fiercely and pushed me down on the couch. I knew I was driving everyone crazy, but he shocked me when I got a look at his face. His teeth were clenched and his eyes scrunched together, as if trying to keep from exploding. "Please…sit…still," he begged me through clenched teeth.

And I sat there, motionless, for an hour, scared stiff at what Emmett would do if I moved even an inch.

And then the phone rang. It took all the self-control I had to stay on the couch, but I felt my fingers begin to twitch, my toes itching to run for the phone. Alice answered in a cheery voice, the only one who didn't seem to have been put down by my mood. She listened for a moment, her brow furrowing anxiously.

"Should I tell her," she asked as she glanced at me. That did me in, and I raced to where she stood, clutching the phone in her tiny hand. I refrained myself from grabbing the phone, but I could hear Carlisle's low voice talking fast. Then there was a pause, and I heard Carlisle say, "Is she there? Let me talk to her, please."

Alice handed the phone to me, eyeing me as if making sure I was mentally capable of holding a conversation. I grabbed the phone and pressed it to my left ear. "Hello?" I sputtered out. I noticed I sounded maybe a bit too excited, so I toned my voice down before repeating my hello.

Carlisle's voice filled my ear. "Hello, Lisa. I heard you've been causing trouble today."

I groaned, wishing he would skip the chitchat, but said nothing.

Finally, Carlisle said in a serious voice, "Lisa, we could not find him. Your home was sold to an older couple and he no longer works at his job."

My heart fell and my lips sagged into a pout, though really I wanted to cry. "And there's nothing else you can do?"

"I don't know. Can you think of anything?"

I stood still for a long time, thinking, trying to put my thoughts in order. "My parents, perhaps?" I said with hope in my voice.

"Alright," I could hear Carlisle let out a sigh of relief. "Where do they live?"

I relayed to him their address and he said they would head there right away. There was a click on the other end and the line went dead. Slowly I handed the phone back to Alice, who was still watching me, unable to process my thoughts right. What should I think? My husband was gone. Had he sold the house because of all the memories there, or had he found someone else to share his life with? And why would he quit his job, the one he had worked so hard to get and loved? I could not make sense of anything. I walked solemnly to the couch and sat down, Alice taking a seat next to me. She seemed at a loss as to how to help me, so she simply rubbed my back, moving her arm in a soothing circle. I closed my eyes and wished I knew what to do. And what if they couldn't find my parents? Were they gone, too, from the home they had lived in since I was 9? I didn't want to think about it.

I desperately needed someone to help me sort this out, so I turned to Alice suddenly, scaring her a little. "Alice!" I whispered fiercely. I grabbed her free hand in both of mine and held on tightly. "Is there anything else we could do to find him?" I begged her with my eyes to tell me something, anything that could help.

Alice sat silently watching me. "Do you have anything that might have his scent on it," she finally asked me.

I thought very hard about this. "I have things he's touched, but it's been so long," I replied, sadly, feeling my hope come crashing down. But then, as if a match had been dropped back into the fire of my soul, I jumped up and nearly shouted, "Wait!"

I turned back to Alice, who was watching me curiously.

"I had a bag, an overnight bag with me the night of the accident with some of his clothes in it. Does your dad have it?"

Alice stood up now and in a flash the phone reappeared in her hand. She dialed a number at lightning speed and pushed the phone to her ear. She spoke in a rush, relaying what I had thought of. And then she nodded at me, a smile on her lips. "He has it," she mouthed. And then she led me up the stairs and into what I assumed was Carlisle and Esme's room. Alice walked to the closet as she listened to the directions Carlisle was giving her. Pulling open the closet door, she pranced inside the huge walk-in closet. I stared in wonder at all the different clothes that hung there, suits and button-up shirts and medical scrubs on Carlisle's side and shirts, dressed and pants on Esme's side. I saw a few odd items hanging in between all the normal clothing, like a long mother of the groom dress and a white button up suit. By now Alice had found the suitcase and popped it open on the bed, rummaging through it carefully. She had hung up the phone by now and I rejoined her in the bedroom.

"Aha!" she muttered happily. She held up a pair of jeans for me to see.

"Yes, those are his." I took a sniff. "And they still smell like him, too," I said softly, as I let the scent fill my nose and lungs. I clutched the jeans to my chest and told her there was also a button up shirt and sweater inside. She pulled both out without putting a single wrinkle in them. "Very nice," she muttered appreciatively. "Classy but casual."

I smiled.

She was still digging and suddenly begging laughing. She held up a pair of boxer shorts. "Do you want to add these, too?"

If I had been able to blush, she would have seen my face go bright red. "No," I stuttered out. "You can put those back."

Alice was still laughing, though now mostly to herself. She folded the boxers back into the bag and then looked up at me, smiling. "Do you want this bag? I see it has some of your clothes in it as well." She put emphasis on the word 'clothes' and I realized she must have seen my nice silk panties and bra. I blushed internally.

I shook my head. "Just put it back in the closet. And make sure to zip it, please!"

Alice nodded, laughing again, and replaced the bag carefully. Then we both walked out of the room and back downstairs, where she began searching for a large Ziploc bag. She was still chuckling under her breath.

"We want to preserve the smell as much as possible," she explained. "It's quiet amazing it still smells so much like him, after sitting in the back of a closet that belongs to vampires for so long."

When she produced a Ziploc bag that was large enough to at least hold each piece separately, we stuffed them inside, being careful to touch it as little as possible. Then we put the three bags into a paper shopping bag and placed it by the door. "Carlisle will be home soon, and tomorrow they'll try tracking your husband by his smell. It will be hard though, since we don't really have any idea where to look."

"My parents? Were they still there, in the house?"

"Well, they still own the same house if that's what you mean. They were just leaving as the boys pulled up to the house."

"Oh," was all I could manage. I wasn't sure whether I was disappointed or not. "Did Carlisle see their faces? Did they look sad?"

"I don't know," replied Alice, "You'll have to ask him when he gets back here.

I nodded and stalked back into the living room, switching on the TV silently and flipping through channels, though not really paying attention. Alice finally helped me pick out a show, and we watched together in silence, though I'm not sure if she was paying attention. I wasn't.

Carlisle, Edward, and Jasper walked in silently a few hours later. Jasper came to sit next to Alice, whispering to her so low I couldn't hear. I stood up and followed Carlisle to his office. I watched silently as he pulled off his rain jacket, hanging it on the coat rack behind his desk. He sat down and folded his hands in his lap, watching me quietly. I sat down in the same chair I always sat in and looked back at him, expectantly.

"Did you see them," I finally asked him in a low voice.

He kept watching me for a minute. "Your grandparents," he asked. "Yes, we did. They were leaving the house just as we pulled up."

"Did you see their faces?"

Again Carlisle was silent for a moment. "I've seen many faces over the years, and it's hard to forget the face of a parent who has lost their child, especially when it is unexpected. Your parents still have a hint of that look in their eyes, but I believe they're trying to move on with their life. Edward told me your father thought of you the whole way to the car, and probably had been thinking about you for a while. They miss you, Lisa."

I bit my lip, my eyes burning with tears I could not cry. "And my husband? When will you go to look for him?"

"Alice told me you found the clothing with his scent still on it. We'll start tomorrow, early. Edward is coming with us incase we can locate your husband by his thoughts. Jasper and Emmett are the best trackers out of all of us, though we need to leave a man here because we don't know how long we'll be gone. So Jasper will stay behind here."

"I'm sure he's stayed close. John is not the sort of man to pack up and move to Australia. He has ties here, and it will be hard to break those." I looked at the floor and whispered, mostly to myself, though I was sure Carlisle could hear me, "It must have been extremely hard to even sell the house."

"He didn't sell it, he's renting it out."

I shook my head, sadness flowing over me. "My poor baby."

I put my head in my hands and sat silent for a long time. Carlisle did nothing to disturb me.

Then I stood up slowly, supporting myself with the chair arm, and walked slowly towards the door. I stopped before I opened it and turned to face Carlisle. "Thank you so much for doing this for me. You and your family… I'm so thankful to have you as my friends."

Carlisle nodded, smiling. "You've become like family, Lisa. We're glad to do it." He added softly, "We just don't want to see you hurt."

I wasn't sure whether he was talking about my current pain or warning me about the pain that might be coming later. I walked out of the room and nearly ran to my room. I just wanted to be alone for a little bit. I wasn't going to try to figure anything out because I knew I couldn't, not right now at least. I just sat down on the couch, still as a statue, and didn't move for the rest of the night as I let every emotion I felt have its 'five minutes of fame'.