…And in the Nineteenth Hour…

Peter, Remus, and Sirius were in a foul mood, whereas Lily was oddly cheerful for a change. Peter was mad from being tossed from the bed and having a mattress thrown on him, Remus was still mad from being ripped from the best dream he had ever had, and Sirius was just looking oddly disturbed, but only Lily and James knew why and everyone else was in too bad a mood to ask him about it.

"You know," Lily said after a long, tense silence while the angry boys glared at the walls, "none of you have a right to be mad. Remember how you stuck us all in here?"

"Actually," Remus turned to her with a mad look, "that was your fault if you think about it. If you and James had just told us that you were together, we would have never bothered and we wouldn't all be here."

Lily glared back at him. "So you're saying that I should let all of you in on every detail of my life because you just might be planning to do something stupid to me?"

"YES!" Sirius burst.

"It was actually my idea to keep it a secret," James said slowly.

"OH, what a COINCEDENCE!" Peter said accusingly as he pointed a finger at James. "It was also YOU who closed the door, trapping us all in here in the first place!"

"YOU trapped us in here!" Lily said shrilly, "How was he to know that you BEASTS would put glue on the lock?"

"He should have expected it! It's US!" Sirius yelled back.

"That's the stupidest argument that I've ever heard," James said.

"How is it stupid?" Remus asked curiously. "I think it's a rather good argument. Considering that we've been friends for years and know each other so well. If it was the other way around and I was dating Lily, I would fully expect it out of the rest of you."

"Oh come ON," James rolled his eyes, "don't act like you know us better than I know you guys."

"Obviously you don't," Remus argued, "You didn't see any of this coming."

"Just because I didn't see this, doesn't mean that I don't know what to expect from you." James snapped.

"I'm sorry," Remus said confusedly, "I know you just said something, but it sounded like, 'I don't know my friends, I don't know my friends, Remus knows more than me.'"

James glowered. "You do not!"

"I do."

"No you don't!"

"Yes, James, I do."

"NO you do NOT!"

"Yes, James, he does."

"Sirius, back off."

Sirius huffed and crossed his arms. "Never…you traitor."

James sighed. "How am I a traitor?"

Peter stared at him in disbelief. "Seriously? You're actually going to ask that? YOU get woken up by Lily giggling and kissing you, WE," Peter motioned to himself, Remus, and Sirius, "got woken up in less desirable ways and you're taking Lily's side!"

James frowned, Lily glared.

"Hum…" James nodded. "I guess I am a traitor."

Lily gaped. "James!"

"But," James continued as though he hadn't heard her. "Have you seen my—er…girlfriend? Look at her! You would be a traitor too."

Remus studied James curiously, causing him to fidget nervously. Damn Remus for being so observant!

"Why did you hesitate before you said girlfriend?" Remus asked and James screamed.

"I DIDN'T! We didn't do ANYTHING in Hogsmeade but get drunk!"

Remus wore a triumphant smirk, Peter and Sirius wore identical confused stares, Lily's whole face turned bright red, and James gulped nervously before clearing his throat. He was going to make things right. Right now he just had to think of a justifiable reason why he had just made himself look so insane. And he had it!

He opened his mouth to speak—before Remus cut him off.

"You got married in Hogsmeade, didn't you?"

James and Lily both glanced at each other—Remus grinned evilly, knowing he had guessed right—and then they both burst into laughter at the same time.

And they laughed for a long, long VERY LONG time.

…And in the Twentieth Hour…

"SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!" Remus thundered at Lily and James. "You've been laughing for AN HOUR! I GET it, I was wrong, it's not THAT FUNNY!"

"Oh my God," Lily groaned as she clutched her aching stomach with one arm and wiped the tears off of her face with the other. "This is hilarious—I can't believe you said that Remus, that was so…so," she burst into giggles again, causing James to howl with laughter and fall sideways into the wall where he slowly slid down to the floor.

"My head hurts," Sirius said as he glared at Lily and James. "It's eight o'clock in the morning; it's too early for this." He rubbed his eyes. "I'm tired, and I'm hungry…no, I'm starving and I-" he stopped suddenly as his eyes lit up. "Wait a second," he stood up quickly off of Debbie's bed, "Evan's has crackers in her trunk!"

Remus and Peter both jumped to their feet at these words and along with Sirius, they all dived for Lily's trunk like a pack of hungry wolves.

Sirius got there first, only to be pushed out of the way by Remus, who ended up with Peter on his back, trying to get the lid first. Then Sirius came back, tackling both of them to the ground and then jumping onto the trunk triumphantly. Then after he realized that he couldn't open the trunk while he was ON TOP of it (he was delirious from not eating), he jumped off.

As soon as he jumped off and attempted to open the trunk, Lily came from no where and whacked him on the back of the head with a pillow.

The pillow weighed nothing and normally this would never have hurt him in the least, but given the fact that he had hardly gotten any sleep, and hadn't eaten in a good amount of time, the hit made his head feel very light all of a sudden and he was sure he had gone cross-eyed.

"GET AWAY FROM THERE!" Lily was bellowing as she attempted to attack the other boys with the pillow.

Remus and Peter both tackled her at once, causing James to gape at them. As Remus jerked the pillow from her and tossed it away, James came forward.

"You just hit a girl!" He yelled accusingly as he helped Lily to her feet. "You should be ashamed!"

Now it was the Remus, Peter's, and Sirius's turn to gape.

"Are you SERIOUS?" Peter shrieked. "She's been beating the hell out of us since we got in here!"

"That's different!" James argued as he started checking Lily over for bruises. "She's a girl, you don't hit girls! You could have seriously hurt her!"

Unbeknownst to James, since he was checking her arms over for marks, Lily was sending a glare that could melt lead over at the other boys. They all cringed at this.

"James!" Remus pointed at Lily, "Look at her! Look how EVIL she looks!"

James rolled his eyes before looking back up at Lily's face, but by the time he had looked there, she had lost the death glare was looking at him with a pair of wide, innocent, green eyes. The other boys watched, feeling disgusted as she pouted at him and his whole face softened at the look.

"Aw, no she doesn't!" He said happily as he bent to kiss her gently. "She's my Lily," he sighed in contentment as he swept her up in a bear hug.

"This is revolting," Sirius said.

"This is weird," Remus nodded in agreement.

"This is good," Peter said and the other two boys turned to see what he was talking about, to see that he had somehow gotten to the trunk during this whole thing and got a hold of the crackers.

"VICTORY!" Sirius laughed gleefully as he ran into the bathroom with Remus and Peter, AWAY from the crazy girl who would kill them if she had the chance.

After the door slammed, Lily looked up at James, who still had his arms around her.

"Those guy's are suckers," she said as she reached up to link her arms around his neck. "I can't believe that worked."

James nodded. "Yeah, and it's also weird that we never have to talk about the strategies to get them out of the room beforehand. We just figure it out as we go along. How does that work?"

She snuggled closer. "I don't know, I guess we're perfect for each other."

He kissed her on the nose and nodded. "I guess we ought to be since we really did get married in Hogsmeade."

"Yeah, let's not tell anyone that we got drunk and eloped," Lily shuddered as she thought of what her father would say. "Let's just have another ceremony and invite everyone, take lots of pictures, and pretend it was our first one."

"Ok," James said happily as he bent to kiss her again. "I love you Lily Potter."

She smiled. "And I love…owl?"

"Uh…don't you mean, 'owls'? Um, I mean James." James said in confusion before following Lily's gaze out of the window. There was an owl flying out there, and it was heading straight for their window.

Lily watched its progress with a swelling of hope inside of her. If that owl was coming to her window, then she could use it to send a letter down to Professor Dumbledore and he could break them out! Speaking of which, she wondered if any of the Professors had noticed them missing. Not as many people left the castle for Easter break as they did for Christmas, but their absence still should have been noticeable. She explained all of this to James as they watched the bird.

Her heart sunk as she watched it dip down, but then it suddenly came back up and landed outside of her window.

She rushed over to it and opened it quickly. The bird, who looked extremely irritated, stuck out his leg towards her and clucked his beak as though he were telling her to hurry up. Tied to his leg was a little Easter basket, wrapped up and filled with candy no doubt, and a letter from her mother.

"Can you just hold on a sec?" She asked the bird awkwardly as untied the basket, "I have a letter for you to send."

"Riiii!" The bird screamed at her viciously and ruffled his feathers.

Lily glanced back at James, who was looking kind of scared, before turning back to the owl.

"Uh…please?" she asked as she finished untying the basket.

"Riiii!" And a furious attempt at biting her finger was the response she received before he turned to the window.

"Oh no you don't!" James leapt forward and slammed the window closed.

Lily watched in concern and horror as the bird stopped its progress and slowly, SLOWLY, turned its head completely around backwards to glare at James.

"Riiiiiiii!"

"Er, James," she was going to tell him to open the window, and QUICK before the owl ate them alive, when suddenly the bird swung completely around and flew off of the desk towards James's head.

"AH!" James dived and rolled out of the way before springing back to his feet. "Stupid bird! You're sending that letter!"

"Riiii!" The bird screamed again as he—or she started swooping down at his head.

"LILY, WRITE THE LETTER!" James screamed as he dived across a bed and then held up a pillow to hide his face behind. "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WRITE THE LETTER!"

"I don't think he's going to send it, James!" She argued as the bird somehow swooped down, grabbed the pillow from James, and then tossed it away before going for his head again.

"THEN OPEN THE WINDOW, WOMAN!" James, now stuck in a corner, faked to the left, then the right, then the left again before he somersaulted under the screeching owl and sprinted away across the room again.

Lily flung the window open and called the bird. "BIRD! BIRD! The window is OPEN!"

"Riiii!" The bird screeched as it flew down at James who caught it claws in his hands and started having a VERY strange looking arm wrestling match.

A few minutes earlier in the bathroom, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were happily eating their crackers, but sadly reaching the bottom of the box.

"I get that one!" Peter said as he dove his hand in. "It's shaped like an elephant."

"Yeah," Sirius said, "just like you're face."

Remus snorted as Peter glared.

"Sorry, I couldn't help myself," Sirius grinned.

"Yeah," Peter nodded as though he were remembering something. "That's what your mom told me last time I saw her."

Remus snorted again, nearly choking on his cracker, while Sirius glowered.

"She did not say that to you." He said simply before biting into a cracker shaped like a tiger.

"Hey," Remus said after a moment's silence, "er, I just remembered this, but remember the LAST time we left Lily and James alone in a room together? Remember what they did with us right THERE?"

Sirius and Peter both paled.

"You don't think," Sirius started before a loud noise suddenly cut through the air.

"Riiii!"

"LILY, WRITE THE LETTER!"

"Um," Remus looked worriedly at the door. "Did Lily just scream, riiii?"

Peter and Sirius both looked disgusted.

"EW!" They said in unison.

"I'm glad they kept quiet last time," Sirius shook his head and thought of covering his ears.

Remus waved a hand at them to be quiet as he leaned toward the door. "Wait, they're saying something."

"BIRD! BIRD! THE WINDOW IS OPEN!"

Remus, Peter, and Sirius all gawked at each other. They all felt…violated.

"Is she calling James, bird?" Peter asked. "And I don't want to know want the window is supposed to be."

Remus glanced at the door and then back at the two boys. "Wait a second, this can't be right, I'm going out there."

"EW!" Sirius and Peter screamed but it was too late. Remus had opened the door and looked out.

They were met with the sight of James, locked in a death grip with a VERY angry looking owl, wrestling for his life, Lily, screaming at the bird and showing it the open window, and the room looking like it had been ripped apart. Not that the state of the room was the important issue at the moment, but Remus noticed it anyway.

"YOU STUPID BIRD! YOU'RE GOING DOWN!" James screamed as he let go of its legs and attempted to give it a right hook.

"Riiii!" The bird flew out of the way before crapping out two big drops of what looked like lint, which VERY narrowly avoided missing James in the head. It screamed once more, flew around the room in a big circle and then out of the window that Lily closed and locked with a fearful look.

The room rang with silence. James's hands were scratched and bloody, Lily looked (and felt) terrified, Peter still had a cracker handing halfway out of his mouth, and Sirius and Remus wore identical shocked expressions.

Remus was the first to speak after a long, tense silence.

"What the hell?"

…