DISCLAIMER! I own this about as much as Hermione can draw!

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"What the hell, Black?" Severus had pushed the Gryffindor away the second the other man's mouth had touched his.

The color drained from Sirius's face as he crawled backwards into the dirty creek, his hand over his mouth, shocked to his very core. He looked like he wanted to speak, but nothing escaped his lips. The lips that had just touched Severus's.

"Goddamn it!" The Slytherin stood up hastily and drew his wand. "Levicorpus!" he shouted, not bothering to check if any muggles were around.

In one fluid movement, Sirius found himself hanging upside down. He reached into his back pocket for his wand, it slipped through his fingers and landed in the creek with a splash.

Severus, keeping his attention to the man, rushed forward and grabbed the magical piece of wood before it could be taken away with the current. He smiled to himself, he had something to use against the former heir. "Listen here, Black. If you want your precious-" Severus took a step backwards and lost his footing on a slippery rock near the floating Gryffindork.

Suddenly Sirius felt gravity take over. He found himself falling head first into the shallow stream or rushing water, into blackness.

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As Sirius blinked against the near blinding light of the world, he became aware of his surroundings; he was in 'his room', messy as ever. Beside him was an unusual suspect. A woman sat on a stool beside him, Petunia Evans.

"What happened to your hair?" Sirius asked, motioning with a dizzying flick of the head to Petunia's formerly blonde 'do.

"I was dying it when Severus came by with your corpse," she answered, twirling a dark lock around her slim fingers as she spoke. "I needed a change of pace."

Sirius shivered when the older woman said corpse. How close had he come to being one? Something else also caught his attention, "Snape brought me here?"

Petunia nodded. "He was flushed and out of breath." She bit her glossy bottom lip, obviously savoring each detail.

"And then what?" Sirius directed, trying to keep the image engrained in the woman's brain out of his mind.

"He brought you up here, gave you some swampy goop and told me to watch you."

"Why you? Why not-"

"Shh..." Petunia whispered, placing a finger over Sirius' mouth. "Stop asking so many questions. You're much prettier if you don't speak."

I could say the same for you, Sirius thought, watching Lily's strange elder sister saunter out of the room.

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When Sirius got up the next morning, the sun was only just peaking over the roofs of the surrounding houses. He stretched and as per usual, instead of venturing to his closet or a dresser for clothes, picked up some clean looking garments off the floor. As he was about to put them on, he remembered that he had fallen into a dirty creek yesterday. To put it bluntly, he smelled.

He made his way to the bathroom, and shed his clothes. He turned on the water, and allowed the tepid liquid to pelt his body. He had only taken baths when he lived at Grimauld place, but Sirius had to admit that showers had their advantages.

Once fully dressed and prepared for the day, Sirius made his way downstairs.

"Oh, good morning Sirius," Mr. Evans greeted, putting down his coffee. "Care to join me?"

"S-sure." Sirius got himself a cup of joe and sat perpendicular to the blond man.

It was awkwardly silent for a moment, with only the sounds of slurping being heard. Lily's father asked Sirius about his time in the house and whether or not he was having a good summer, the usual questions a host would ask. Then a more serious question was raised.

"At the beginning of all this, when Lils asked if you could stay with us... She never told us anything about the situation with your parents." Sirius spluttered on his coffee. "Could you shed some light on this? I'm not trying to pressure you or anything-"

"It's fine," Sirius cut him off. "I'm pretty sure the secret's out anyway." The wizard sighed. "Mister E, I..."

"As long as you didn't kill anyone."

"No I- I would never!"

All of a sudden there was a pecking at the kitchen window, and Mr. Evans excused himself from the table and let the horned owl in. Sirius recognized it immediately as James' owl, Claw, and was thankful for the interruption. It had a letter in its talons that Mr. Evans traded for a treat of some sort. Claw hooted and took off.

"Say, could you give this to Lily for me? I have to go to work," Mr. Evans asked, putting the sealed parchment on the table. He grabbed his coat and left the room, leaving Sirius slightly annoyed about the fact that his best friend had written a letter to Evans, and not himself.

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At this point Sirius has been in Spinners End for almost a month. As this is taking place during Summer Vacation, I only have two fictional months to stuff all the ideas I came up with into the story! I will leave you to imagine what has been going on behind the scenes!

As always, a shoutout to This. Is. SCRUMPTIOUS, go read her stories.

I hope you can all stay with me till the end of the story and possibly beyond! (wink wink?)