AN UPDATE! AAAAAHHHHHHHH! I'm so sorry about the super long wait! I just... other fics happened... you know...
And um, my sister didn't help with this chapter. It was just me. And since I've been writing a mostly darker, slightly depressing stuff recently, I really hope I was able to make this light and hopefully funny! O.O
An another note, gamingcharacter on deviantArt drew a picture of Jotun!Loki for this story, and you can find the link on my profile :) I highly suggest you check it out!
Also on my profile is the link to a PETITION TO GET LOKI HIS VERY OWN MARVEL MOVIE OMG if you're a Loki fan, and you think that would be absolutely and incredibly amazing in every way possible, do sign it!
And without further ado, I hope you enjoy the chapter ^.^
"I'll race you to the top!" Tony exclaimed, sprinting for the elevator. He got inside, quickly pressing the button labeled 'Hangout Floor'. "Come on, Jarvis, close the doors!" he whined, as Bruce and Natasha slipped in as well.
He smirked at the god through the sliver between the closing doors.
Loki just rolled his eyes. He gave the humans a ten second head start before sprinting up the stairs.
"Ha!" Tony exclaimed, as the elevator doors opened and the three of them stepped out onto the floor. "Take that!"
"You speak too soon, mortal," Loki said smoothly, leaning against the counter, arms crossed over his chest, left over right.
Tony blinked. "Okay, how long has he been here?" Tony asked, turning to the archer who was rifling through the freezer and taking out every single carton of ice cream, placing them in rows along the counter.
He hadn't realized he'd had so much ice cream.
"He beat you by like a minute," Clint shrugged, waving his left hand, which held several metal spoons. "I already gave him a spoon and everything."
Loki raised a hand, a silver spoon held delicately between his fingers.
Tony frowned, nursing his wounded pride. "Jarvis? How fast would the elevators have to be in order to beat a god?"
"Faster than safety standards would allow, Sir." Jarvis answered.
"Hmmph," Tony sighed. "Fine. At least I beat Thor." He glanced around, noting that Loki and five of the six Avengers were here. "Where is Point Break, anyway?"
"He went to visit Jane," Natasha said, examining the containers of ice cream, rearranging them as she read the labels.
Tony's hand went to his pocket, as he said "Well I'll just text him to get back here and bring his girl too—where the hell is my phone?" He tapped all his pants pockets, then checked those on his coat. "I could have sworn…"
He glanced up, to see Loki holding a red and gold phone in his hand, smirking.
"Well shit," the billionaire said.
"Shall I text him for you?" Loki asked, raising his eyebrows. "I can even make it sound like you." His smirk grew.
The genius groaned, saying "Please don't—"
But Loki's thumbs were already skittering across the screen.
Something buzzed in Thor's pants pocket, and he jumped, fingers fumbling as he pulled out a StarkPhone. "I got a text?" he asked, somewhat unsure.
"Here," Jane, offered, clicking on the text so he could read it.
Thor, get yo a$$ 2 my tower. Bring ur girl 2. We have icecream.
"What say you, Lady Jane?" Thor asked, looking at the brown-eyed woman.
She smiled. "I say yes."
They walked outside, a Jane heading for her car.
"Can I come?" Darcy asked, poking her head out the door, only to see Thor pull Jane to his side, twirl his hammer and take off into, flying through the New York skyline.
Darcy pouted and gave a melodramatic sigh. "I'll just go sit here by myself and listen to my music then, I guess..."
"So, what flavors do you all want?" Tony asked, noting that Steve already had a half-gallon of vanilla, his spoon stuck in the top, looking slightly confused about why he given ice cream and then told not to eat it.
"We're going to have an ice cream eating contest," Clint declared, holding his own container of Phish Food. "To see who can eat a half-gallon of ice cream fastest." He grinned. "So make sure you choose a flavor you like."
"Whatcha think, Reindeer Games?" Tony said, tilting his head thoughtfully as he considered the flavors, before picking one up and handing it to the god. "You look like a mint chocolate chip kind of guy to me."
"No thanks." Loki set it back on the counter, taking instead some peach sorbet.
"Sorbet?" Tony asked, scandalized. "Are you kidding me?"
Loki smirked thinly. "What is it you mortals call the condition? Ah yes—lactose intolerance, I believe."
"You're a god," Tony deadpanned.
"And a liar." Loki's grin broke open, exposing teeth.
"Fine, be that way," the billionaire snorted, grabbing a half-gallon of Rocky Road, rubbing off the layer of frost from the top.
Natasha decisively chose Mexican Chocolate, while Bruce examined every flavor, only finally deciding on pistachio when Thor set down upon the landing pad, Jane beside him, her mouth open, brown hair ruffled.
"Oh my god…" she breathed, and Thor just smiled down at her, before striding over to the glass door and opening it, holding it open for his girlfriend and entering behind her.
"You said something about cream of ice?" Thor inquired, as they both walked over.
"Yep," Tony nodded. "Ice cream eating contest, to see who can eat a half-gallon fastest. Pick a flavor! Jarvis will keep tabs."
Thor groaned, glancing over at Loki, who smirked at him.
"This is hardly a fair competition," Thor muttered.
Tony grinned cockily. "Are you so sure about that?"
"Quite."
"Dude, just because you're a god doesn't mean you should count us humans out!"
"That's not what I meant…" Thor said, sighing as he gave up. They'd see.
Seeing that Thor looked overwhelmed by all the unfamiliar flavors, Jane chose one for him, handing him a carton of Cookie Dough. "Here, this one's good," she said.
She then sat on a stool at the counter, crossing her legs at the ankles, trying not to smile at the thought of how the ice cream eating contest would go.
"Right," Clint said, as they all sat in a circle on the floor like children. "On your mark!"
Lids were popped off containers.
"Get set!"
Spoons were readied like weapons.
"GO!"
Everyone dug in.
In the first few moments Thor had accidentally bent his metal spoon, dropping and beginning to eat with his hands, Tony glancing over and quickly following example, not to be outdone.
Natasha seemed completely unrushed, and smirking, she flung a spoonful at Clint, catching him in the cheek.
He retaliated, but she caught the ice cream in her mouth.
Soon Mexican Chocolate and Phish Food were flying across the room, but their aim was good enough that nobody else was bothered.
Steve ate slowly, closing his eyes and relishing the taste of vanilla melting on his tongue. It was far too savory to eat quickly.
Bruce tried somewhat halfheartedly, grimacing in empathy as Thor began groaning, clutching his head in his hands.
"What sorcery is this?" the god asked weakly, shaking his head and shivering.
"Braiiiiiiin freeeeeeze…" Tony moaned, fingers pressed against his temples, in the same condition as the god of thunder.
Loki watched them all, scratching the metal spoon up with his teeth, his container of peach sorbet already finished and placed upside down in front of him.
"What is this ailment you speak of?" he asked curiously.
Tony slowly removed his hands from in front of his eyes, blinking at him. "A brain freeze? You know, when you eat too much cold stuff too fast, and your brain feels like ice is creeping it over and turning into into a slushy?"
Loki shooked his head, and the billionaire finally noticed the empty carton in front of him.
"Have you really already finished that?!" he exclaimed.
"King Loki has been finished for the last five minutes," Jarvis said.
Thor couldn't help but glance up at the ceiling through his fingers, still clutching his head.
"King Loki?!" Tony said, shocked, before turning and pinning the dark god with a glare. "Did you hack Jarvis?"
A childlike expression of schooled guilt graced the god's pale features, almost innocent. "Maybe a little bit…."
Tony's face met his ice cream, and when he jerked it back up it was covered in chocolate.
He turned to glare at Thor this time. "Your brother—"
"—I am not Thor's brother."
"I told you it wasn't a fair competition," Thor interrupted pointedly, shrugging. "And yes Loki, you will always be my bro—"
"No I won't!"
"Oh please you two," Natasha rolled her eyes. "You're acting like children. Loki, Thor obviously loves you, okay? You'd do well to realize that."
Loki narrowed his green eyes at her, and she held his gaze.
"You're covered in ice cream," he said. Glancing around, he amended "Actually, you're all covered in ice cream."
The two assassins were splattered with the dessert from head to toe, while Tony and Thor's faces and hands were smothered in it.
Even Bruce and Steve had drips on them.
"I'd appreciate it if you'd all wash up as soon as you're finished," Loki berated like a mother, before rising to his feet, stretching, and walking over to sit on a stool beside Jane.
"You can still make second place," he reminded them with a smirk, before taking earbuds and an iPod out of his pocket, beginning to listen to music, his stool swiveling back and forth.
Sharing a competitive glance, Tony and Thor began racing for silver.
"What are you listening to?" Jane asked Loki curiously, craning her neck to try to see the screen of the iPod.
He rolled his bony shoulders, smiling amusedly, before he began singing.
"Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
What's wrong with me?"
Loki shook his head slightly, black tresses falling from behind his ear.
"Why do I feel like this?
I'm going crazy now!
No more gas in the rig
Can't even get it started
Nothing heard, nothing said
Can't even speak about it" he sang, a pale hand fluttering up to hide his moving lips.
"Out my life, out my head
Don't wanna think about it
Feels like I'm going insane
Yeah!"
Thor's cries of victories he kept muted, not wanting to disturb his brothers singing. He began to collect ice cream cartons as people finished, placing them upside down in front of him and drumming on them with a couple spoons.
"It's a thief in the night
To come and grab you," Loki continued, sneaking up behind Thor and tazering him, making the thunder god yelp.
"It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you." He danced his feet across the room, nodding his head to the beat in his ears. He grabbed a couple guitars from their various hiding places (behind a potted palm and on top of the refrigerator), handing them to Clint and Tony.
"It's too close for comfort
Throw on your brake lights
We're in the city of wonder." Loki gestured out the window at the impressive view of New York sprawled out below them, smirking.
"Ain't gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered." HIs smile grew feral teeth.
"So if you must falter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia," he sang, sliding to his knees, tilting his head back to look behind him.
"It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia"
He stalked to his feet, shoulder blades rolling visibly beneath the thin green fabric of his button- up shirt. "Am I scaring you tonight?
Disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia"
He kicked the bass out from under the couch, sending it sliding to Steve's feet.
"Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum."
Loki held out a hand to Natasha, who took it, the two of them beginning to dance what might be categorized as 'Asgardian Swing' (a sort of blend between West Coast Wing and Traditional Asgardian Ballroom). It was a lively dance full of twirls and style that traveled over the entire floor.
"Faded pictures on the wall
It's like they talkin' to me
Disconnecting all the calls
Your phone don't even ring."
The phone in Loki's pocket rang at that exact moment, and he rolled his eyes while Natasha murmured "Ironic."
"I gotta get out
Or figure this shit out
It's too close for comfort, oh."
The phone kept ringing, and Loki pulled it out of his pocket, frowning at it and looking like he was about to chuck it out the window like he'd done to its equally annoying owner, before instead handing it to Natasha.
She glared at him unconvincingly.
"It's a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
I feel like a monster!"
Bowing respectfully to Natasha for their dance, he then glided over to Jane, sweeping her into the center of the room which he'd claimed dancefloor.
"Throw on your brake lights
We're in the city of wonder"
"(City of lights)" Natasha started singing backup, voice lilting in harmony.
"Ain't gonna play nice"
"(Oh)"
"Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice"
"(Think twice)"
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise"
"(Be wise)"
"Your mind is in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia"
Jane laughed in shocked delight as she was twirled.
"Am I scaring you tonight?
Disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
"(What you like)"
Disturbia
Disturbia"
Seeing Thor looking at them slightly enviously, Loki just winked at him, dancing faster.
"Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum"
Stupid gods, Tony thought. Able to dance and sing at the same time and not get out of breath.
It really wasn't fair.
And they had magical powers too!
"Release me from this curse I'm in
Trying to maintain
But I'm struggling
If you can't go, go, go
I think I'm gonna oh, oh, oh!"
When the song ended and Loki's voice trailed off, he tipped Jane gracefully backwards, her long hair brushing the floor, before pulling her back up and sending her twirling, dizzy, into Thor's waiting arms.
Tony shook his head, saying "You're a charmer, you know that right?" to which Loki but smiled innocently.
"Well if the genius says so it must be true."
"Oh don't snark me, Reindeer Games."
"Afraid of being out-snarked, Stark?"
"Loki," Thor interjected their banter, both brunettes turning to glare at him, though he seemed oblivious to it. "Can I see your iPod?"
"Not a chance," Loki snapped, "You'll break it." at the same time as Tony said "It's my iPod, actually - Loki stole it from me."
"I just want to play one song," the thunderer pleaded.
Loki snorted. "Uh huh…"
"Loki may I?" Jane offered, holding out a hand questioningly.
The God of Lies looked back and forth between the two, before walking over to the speakers and plugging the iPod in, then letting Jane run her finger through the songs.
Apparently she knew which one the thunder god wanted to play, because she clicked on it and as it began to play Thor beamed.
Loki rolled his eyes at the ceiling (was that synonymous for rolling one's eyes at Jarvis?)
"Really, Thor? Really?"
Tony on the other hand whooped, before beginning to sing along.
"You turned away when I looked you in the eye,
And hesitated when I asked if you were alright,
Seems like you're fighting for you life,
But why? oh why?
Wide awake in the middle of your nightmare,
You saw it comin' but it hit you outta no where,
And theres always scars
When you fall that far!"
Loki fought the urge to facepalm as the lyrics continued, the reason Thor had for wanting to play this far too obvious.
"We lose our way,"Tony continued singing, pulling everyone out onto in the middle of the room (onto the dancefloor), and starting a dance party.
"We get back up again
It's never too late to get back up again,
One day you will shine again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever,
Lose our way,
We get back up again,
So get up, get up,
You gonna shine again,
Never too late to get back up again,
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever
(May be knocked down but not out forever!)"
Loki noticed Steve standing awkwardly in the corner, trying not to be noticed, and with nothing better to do and trying his best to ignore the blatant song, he asked "Do you know how to dance?"
The supersoldier shook his head, glancing down, cheeks flushing.
Tony moved lightly to the beat, singing "You're rolled out at the dawning of the day
Heart racin' as you made you little get away,
It feels like you've been runnin' all your life
But, why? Oh why?"
Loki grabbed Steve's hand and dragged him out onto the floor, beginning to teach Steve how to dance. He would show the soldier the guy's moves, and then he would play the girl, letting Steve somewhat clumsily lead him, giving pointers all the time.
"So you've pulled away from the love that would've been there,
You start believin' that your situation's unfair
But there's always scars,
When you fall back far!" Tony sang, beginning to fistpump.
"We lose our way,
We get back up again
Never too late to get back up again,
One day, you gonna shine again,
You may be knocked down but not out forever,
Lose our way, we get back up again,
So get up, get up
You gonna shine again
It's never too late, to get back up again
You may be knocked down, but not out forever,
May be knocked down, but not out forever!"
"You seem to have done this before," Steve remarked, as Loki somewhat patiently corrected his steps.
Loki's mouth quirked. "I had to teach Thor this way," he admitted.
"This is love callin', love callin', out to the broken,
This is love callin'.
This is love callin', love callin', out to the broken
This is love callin'.
This is love callin', love callin',
I am so broken
This is love callin' love callin!"
Loki made a face, scrunching up his nose. "Love is for children," he muttered to himself.
"Is it?" Steve asked, raising an eyebrow and trying to read Loki's face, accidentally stepping on the god's toes.
Loki glared at him, before making him go over the sugarpush yet again.
"Lose our way, (way way way ay ay ay)
We get back up, (get back up again)
It's never too late (late late late ate ate ate)
You may be knocked down but not out forever!
Lose our way,
We get back up again,
So get up get up
You gonna shine again
Never too late to get back up again
You may be knocked down,
But not out forever!"
There were now three couples dancing: Thor and Jane, Clint and Natasha, and Loki trying to teach Steve.
Feeling left out, Tony grabbed Bruce's hand, beginning to dance with the Hulk's alter-ego.
"This is love (lose our way) callin' love callin' (get back up again)
To the broken
This is love (never too late) callin'
(may be knocked down but not out forever)
This is love (lose our way) callin' love callin' (we get back up again)
To the broken
This is love (never too late) callin'
(may be knocked down but not out forever)
This is love callin' love callin'
Out to the broken,
This is love callin'..."
"I get to pick the next song!" Loki called, practically diving across the room to the iPod.
Thor turned to Jane, frowning slightly. "Do you think he understood...?"
"Yes Thor," Jane said, smiling wryly. "I think he did."
Thriller by Michael Jackson started blaring from the speakers, a door creaking open eerily, wolves howling in the background.
There was a collection of groans, like a bouquet of wilting flowers. "LOKI."
"What?" he asked, widening his green eyes. "It's fun to dance to."
I've taken, like, two ballroom dancing classes, for an hour each, so please forgive the vague details. And the 'sugarpush' was the only name of a move I could remember...
The songs from this chapter are Disturbia by Rihanna and Get Back Up by Toby Mac.
Please let me know what you think! I have no idea if this is any good or not, or whether it's even funny at all...