Happy (early) Halloween! :D
Thank you so mu-*insert blackout and static noises here*
*cue lights back on*
Loki'd is currently finding it amusing to go all Victor Von Doom on people and talk in third-person for absolutely not reason.
She would like to thank from the bottom of her heart everyone who has faved, followed, and reviewed this story, because all your incredible support makes her feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And so she has written you an extra long chapter (okay, actually the extra long chapter is because she had less homework than usual this week). She really means the thanks though, despite the fact that in third-person it sounds slightly detached as if she's distancing herself from it. She's not. She's just in a strange mood and is enjoying not using the word 'I'.
Loki'd would also like to inform you that though the first few chapters were a collaboration between her and her younger sister, Frosted, Loki'd is now the only one writing this story and has complete control over everything, and so you might notice things getting slightly more serious and slightly less crack, but she's trying her best to keep the humor up even though it's not really her forte.
She could probably blabber on for longer, but she will stop now so you can all read the chapter, and she hopes you all enjoy.
DISCLAIMER: Loki'd does not own any of the characters nor does she own any of the songs. Please don't sue her! This story is for entertainment purposes only.
Tony had dutifully entered the results of the song-survey-thing into his computer, done the mathematical and psychological calculations, and ended up with a very clear result: the Avengers and Loki were all very uncooperative.
Very uncooperative.
He got a better result on how they felt about songs just by watching them, rather than by what they filled out.
Seeing as that nobody—not even Steve—filled out the boxes like they were supposed too.
Steve's paper was covered in doodles, which were likely images the songs evoked in his head.
Natasha's paper was covered in lies, and Tony, for all his genius, couldn't untangle the truths.
Clint's paper was covered in banter, and Tony well, slapped him for it the next day.
Bruce's paper was covered in physics equations, such as the mathematical reason why cold beer doesn't stay cold.
Thor actually checked boxes, but his check marks were so large Tony couldn't figure out which box had been checked.
And Loki, of course, had nothing.
Damn. And Tony thought of himself as uncooperative.
Which he was.
But still.
Of course, it had been his experiment... if he didn't cooperate with his own experiments, he'd have to have a serious talking-to with himself, in which neither side of him would get out unscathed.
But there were more pleasant thoughts to be had—such as the approach of Halloween!
And how Tony was going to get all of the Avengers, who were proved uncooperative, to cooperate with his costume idea for Halloween was completely beyond even him.
But he was never one to be conquered by the impossible.
He conquered the impossible.
That was how the world worked.
Or at least, that was what his ego told him.
But his mental scientific calculator of a brain did the equations, and confirmed that his ego was correct.
So there.
And so that was how it happened that on October 31st, Loki walked onto the shared floor that afternoon after reading all morning, and did a double-take.
Because there sitting at the table were six Lokis.
Or rather, the six Avengers wearing dark suits complete with long suit coast, black ties, green patterned scarves, and black wigs that resembled his own dark locks, slicked back and the correct length.
And they were all wearing green contact lenses.
For a moment his face was an absolute deapan, before slowly a smirk sidled amusedly over his lips.
Thor was the worst. Firstly because of his mountainously muscular build, and secondly because he'd refused to shave and still had his large blond beard.
Stark was a close second for last place, because he'd also refused to shave off his signature mustache and goatee.
Banner and Rogers of course had the wrong builds, being shorter and either muscular or stocky, not to mention Rogers' incredibly ignorant looking face and Banner's curly hair, which the wig fit ill over.
Barton and Romanov probably made the most convincing Lokis, he conceded, despite still not looking anything like him. But they both had more lean builds and no facial hair, and Romanov had done her makeup to make her skin paler, shadowed her cheeks to make them look slightly concave, rimmed her eyes slightly with red and added dark bags beneath them, and was proceeding to do the same on her partner.
Loki idly wondered if he really looked that bad. It had been a while since he allowed himself to look in a mirror—he broke the few in his chambers and avoided all others in the tower.
This of course held no encumbrance over his hair situation, which he could deal with by feel.
"Halloween, is it?" Loki inquired casually. "That stupid Midgardian holiday where people dress up in ridiculous costumes and go around door to door begging for candies?"
"Bingo!" Tony grinned, before his brow furrowed and he protested, "Hey wait! Halloween is not stupid!
"Of course," Loki said with gelatinous sweetness, as if indulging an annoying child of their belief in Santa Claus. "Not if it's creepy," he added with a jack-o-lantern grin.
"Boys and girls of every age," Loki started singing, coming over behind Tony's chair and putting his hands on the man's shoulders. He tilted his head, sardonic smile still in place.
"Wouldn't you like to see something strange?
Tony shuddered, and Loki let go, beginning to stalk around the table like a predator.
"Come with us and you will see,
This our town of Halloween," he sang, as he hit the light switch and the room went dim—nearly dark—the only light filtered from the windows gray and ghostly because of the outcast weather.
"This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Pumpkins scream in the dead of night."
Loki slipped through the shadows with a practiced ease. His feet made not a sound, only his lowered voice quavering with menace filling the room as everyone watched him apprehensively.
"This is Halloween, everybody make a scene,
Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright.
"It's our town, everybody scream!" as Loki sang this, he plugged in the Halloween lights, adding an eerie red glow to the mix of black and rain gray.
"In this town of Halloween.
"I am the one hiding under your bed,
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red," he continued, letting the Jotun blue creep across his skin like frostbite, from his fingers up his arms beneath the long sleeves of his white collared button-up shirt, over his neck and mouth and nose and eyes.
His eyes quite literally glowed red.
"I am the one hiding under yours stairs,
Fingers like snakes,"
Loki sang, tickling his fingers up Steve's neck, before flipping his hair and catching Bruce in the face as he hissed, "and spiders in my hair."
"This is Halloween, this is Halloween,
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!" he came up behind his not-brother, hissing and growling into his ear.
Thor shivered. No doubt, Loki thought, Thor had simply believed Halloween to be a fun holiday for children that had lots of sweets.
But oh that would be boring. The fright factor was what actually intrigued him about the Midgardian holiday.
There was something incredibly satisfying in the scent of fear, thick as woodsmoke in his nostrils, and so, so sweet.
"In this town we call home,
Everyone hail to the pumpkin song.
"In this town, don't we love it now,
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise!" his voice tilted higher, with the harsh grin evident in his tone as he seemed to almost fold out of the shadows to grip Bruce's shoulders, making the man jump.
"Round that corner, man hiding in the trash can," as Loki sang this, Tony sent a suspicious glance at the trash bin on the other side of the kitchen. It shook a little.
"Something's waiting no to pounce, and how you'll scream!"
The Avengers flinched violently.
Partly because of the high grating tone of Loki's voice, and partly because even without his magic, Loki was able to startle them, throwing his voice around their heads while they studiously ignored him to show they weren't creeped out, and suddenly he'd be behind them and digging his nails into their shoulders.
":Scream! This is Halloween,
Red 'n' black, slimy green.
"Aren't you scared?
Well, that's just fine!"
Loki would be lying if he didn't admit to himself that he was deeply enjoying this. For being Earth's mightiest heroes, they certainly weren't hard to creep out.
He could see the apprehension would tightly through their frames and creasing in the lines of their mouths.
"Say it once, say it twice,
Take a chance and roll the dice,
Ride with the moon in the dead of night.
"Everybody scream, everybody scream!"
They really shouldn't have hidden the kitchen knives in ceramic flour jars. Because well, nobody baked.
It was too easy to find them and toss them casually between the Avengers fingers as they splayed their hands on the table.
Neither Natasha nor Thor flinched, but Tony actually flailed backwards, falling out of his chair and tumbling to the ground with a small crash.
"In our town of Halloween.
"I am the clown with the tear-away face," he sang, fingers over his face as he pretended to peel it away as he spun, changing his expression from dangerously somber to maniacally gleeful as he did so that it gave the illusion he actually had torn a mask away.
"Here in a flash," he grabbed Tony's hand and yanked him harshly to his feet. "And gone without a trace."
He was suddenly behind Tony and pushed him between the shoulder blades, making him curse as he caught the wall with his face.
"I am the who when you call, Who's there?
I am the wind blowing through your hair,"
Loki whispered, blowing softly on the back of Clint's neck.
The man flinched and swatted at him, but the god danced away, smirking.
"I am the shadow on the moon at night,
Filling your dreams to the brim with fright.
"This is Halloween, this is Halloween
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!
Halloween! Halloween!"
Loki twirled down into a crouch, head down.
With the lack of music besides his voice, their were a few moments of silence as the musical apparently played out in the god's head.
"Tender lumplings everywhere,"
Loki sang, looking up as he stalked to his feet, rolling his shoulder blades.
"Life's no fun without a good scare.
"That's our job, but we're not mean," he sang, shaking his head with murderous innocence.
"In our town of Halloween.
"In this town
Don't we love it now,
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise!"
It wasn't that Thor wasn't disturbed by the genuine growling of Loki's voice or the song, but there was glee springing in the way Loki moved, and the humans at the table had started looking amused, so Thor relaxed slightly.
"Skeleton Jack might catch you in the back
And scream like a banshee,
Make you jump out of your skin!" Loki jabbed Thor in the spine, and the thunderer jumped, yelling in shock while Loki's smile practically split open.
"This is Halloween, everybody scream,
Wont' ya please make way for a very special guy.
"Our man jack is King of the Pumpkin patch
Everyone hail to the Pumpkin King, now!"
Tony knew he had a large jack-o-lantern head somewhere in the tower. What he didn't know was how it quite came to be suddenly over his head.
"This is Halloween, this is Halloween,
Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!"
The sound that crackled out of Loki's throat must have been a cackle.
"In this town we call home," he sang.
"Everyone hail to the pumpkin song!"
The lights flashed on, then flashed off, and for a moment everyone was blinded.
When their eyes readjusted, there was a bowl of roasted pumpkin seeds in the middle of the table, and Loki was calmly cooking himself on omelet, now back to his normal pallid complexion and emerald eyes.
In the dark.
Loki could feel Tony scrutinizing him as he simply wandered around them and over to the kitchen, beginning to fix himself an omelet.
When he came back over to the table and sat down with his omelet, he found them all staring at him curiously with their unnaturally green eyes (which still weren't as green as his).
Raising an single eyebrow in question, he proceeded to eat his omelet as neatly as if he was in one of those super fancy restaurants where you have to dress up formally and put a napkin in your lap and you have to chew with your mouth closed and there's two different forks and two spoons and a knife and you have to know which one to use.
"That's it?" Tony asked finally. "No retribution except for a Halloween song, Marilyn Manson version?"
Addressing the subtext of that question, Loki answered, "I lived in Asgard for thousands of years, mortal. You're going to have to be far less creative than dressing yourselves as myself in order to 'piss me off,' as you mortals say."
"Really," he added, giving them all a smile, "You guys look ridiculous. You didn't even shave!"
Loki snickered. Seeing people dressed as himself—with bears, no less—was quite priceless. He'd never been able to grow a beard, and was quite sure now that he didn't mind.
"I thought you angered easily!" Tony said, narrowing his eyes.
Loki just smirked at him, naturally unhumanly green eyes flicking towards Bruce. "I have a temper," he agreed. His smile grew teeth. "But with great temper and great power comes great need for iron-clad self control, does it not?"
He shook his head then slightly, dark eyebrows lifting and smile becoming so genuinely amiable that it took a moment for the weight of his next words to sink in.
"Otherwise, I would be obliterating worlds on irate impulse."
There was an uncomfortable pause.
"And there you go!" Tony exclaimed, grinning. "First lesson on how to Be Charmingly Evil! Threaten an innocent smile on your face, kids."
Steve however, was still frowning at the Mischief God. "You couldn't," he said.
"Is that a challenge?" Loki inquired, at the same time Thor said, "He could."
"You've not seen even a small degree of my brother's power," Thor continued somberly, as even Loki turned his head to stare at the thunderer.
"He wouldn't," Steve insisted.
"Hey, we're talking about the guy who just tried to take over the world," Tony pointed out. He was about to say more, but was cut off when Natasha finished with Clint's makeup and began to do the billionaire's.
("I don't see why this is necessary," Tony muttered, flinching as her makeup brush got too close too his eye.
"Don't move," she instructed. "If we're dressing up as Loki, we have to at least honor him with his evident sleeplessness and pallor.")
"I would," Loki answered the soldier before Thor this time. Setting down his fork deliberately on his now clean plate, the god took it to the sink.
"You wouldn't," Steve said again with conviction.
Turning around slowly, Loki bestowed upon them a mischievous smirk that bordered heavily on malicious, twisted his thin lips. "Are you so certain, mortal?" he murmured.
"No," chorused Clint and Bruce quickly. Tony contributed a muffled, "Nuh uh."
Steve just had to call a supervillain's ego into question, didn't he?
However instead of the maelstrom burst of evilness and anger they'd been expecting, Loki closed his eyes and took a deep calming breath, before he opened his still red eyes and began singing.
Not yelling. Not screaming. Not blowing things up. Just singing.
And well, playing with the kitchen knives.
"I've got bad blood,
I've done bad things,
How can I control myself
If I enjoy these nasty habits?"
His grin was full of edges, and the wall was full of knives as he vented his anger on something more durable than his favorite play things.
It was almost a shame he had to treat them so carefully.
"I can hear the voices stirring,
All the awful things they're planning."
There was something insane and haunted shifting behind those emerald eyes, wraith-like fingers knitting through midnight hair.
Well fuck this, Tony thought to himself. He stood up and went over to grab his guitar the cereal closet, beginning to accompany Loki with his instrument.
"I don't play nice,
I don't give in.
Was it nature? Was it nurture?
Maybe I was just born evil."
Thor's eyes had been widening in horror, but at this suggestion he bolted to his feet, catching the knife that was thrown his way.
"Loki, stop this madness," Thor rumbled angrily.
Shaking his head like it was the most tragic thing in the world, Loki continued with evil smile still firmly in place and growing more deranged by the moment.
"It's no use I can't control it,
Maybe it's a sign not to quit."
The two gods were circling each other around the table, Loki watching Thor with a deriding amusement while the Thunder God instinctively clutched Mjolnir in his right hand.
The humans sitting at the table quickly got out of the way in case one of the aliens decided to chuck it out of the way.
Not to be outdone by the billionaire, Clint got out his guitar as well.
"I can guarantee that we'll do evil things,
The only way that you can stop me now
is if you put me in the ground
Somewhere I'll never be found," Loki sang, the half-light exacerbating the shadows of his cheekbones and eyes.
Thor riled at this proclamation, indeed flipping the table out of the way in order to get around to his brother.
"I am most disturbed,
I deserve to be interred,
Don't you dare turn your back on me
I'll attack without a warning sign," Loki sang, running over to catch the table and fling it into Thor's face.
"Terror lurks in the night!"
"Maybe you guys should take this to the training area," Bruce suggested.
Nobody seemed to here him.
"I've got nine lives,
I've done grim acts,
No emotion," Loki sang, schooling his face into a dangerously blank and cold expression as Thor shattered the table with Mjolnir and looked at him in betrayal.
"I've been guilty,
No defenses."
(I regret nothing, said those red-rimmed green eyes.)
"I can hear the voices stirring,
All the awful things they're planning."
As Thor bared down on his brother, there was the familiar feel of magic building up, and blue threads of electricity crackled over Loki's form from the shackles, not seeming to bother him in the slightest.
"I don't feel pain,
I don't back down,"
he sang, the electric shocks weaving through his frame intensifying tenfold as Thor was blown backwards.
"My thoughts are filled with cruel intentions,
Maybe my conscience is possessed," he continued with a wry smirk.
The accompanying music had stopped as the Avengers watched with wide eyes as the electric shocks—which Tony had assured them were enough to kill a grown man—did nothing to prevent Loki from kicking Thor in the gut, lifting him by the throat and chucking him into the fractured remains of the table, which burst into green flames.
"Beep!" Dummy exclaimed, rolling over with a fire extinguisher.
"LOKI STOP THIS!" Thor roared, getting to his feet, completely covered in the fire extinguisher stuff.
It began raining green glitter inside the room, sticking to Thor and getting in everyone's hair, and hell Tony thought as he kept one hand on his Iron Man suit-case, they'd have glitter on their scalps for months. The damn stuff was near impossible to clean up.
"It's no use I can't control it," Loki sang, eyes appearing slightly watery in the wavering light.
"Maybe it's a sign not to quit."
"Brother," Thor said forcefully, taking a step forward.
Loki bristled like a cat. "I am not your broth—"
"I DON'T WANT TO WAGE WAR AGAINST YOU!" Thor bellowed.
Freezing, Loki stared at him for a moment in silence, shock written across his features for but a second before it was replaced by frigid amusement.
"Define your meaning of war," Loki sang, beginning a completely new songs as a scepter (not the Chitauri one) materialized in his hands to more crackling blue electricity. "To me it's what we do when we're bored."
The bronze scepter came swinging around, steel blades glinting in the red holiday lights, and Thor caught the strike with Mjolnir.
(Now fight me, screamed those green eyes.)
Thor's jaw set.
"I feel the heat comin' off of the blacktop,
And it makes me want it more.
Because I'm hyped up out of control,
If it's a fight, I'm ready to go," Loki sang, blue sparks skittering across his skin and white sparks spurting where metal met metal.
"I wouldn't put my money on the other guy,
If you know what I know that I know."
Mjolnir came sweeping around, and Loki caught the blow with his wrists, shattering the cuffs.
The electric shocks had been messing up his hair.
"It's been a long time coming," Loki sang, pretty much summing up why all the Avengers did was watch as the gods sparred. Something told them that this was a necessary fight needed to unleash some of those pent up emotions the brothers had been holding on to.
If the melted marshmallow taffy that Loki flung at Thor was any indication, they weren't actually trying to kill each other, and were probably holding back a bit.
Considering that the room wasn't completely demolished already.
"And the table's turned around,
'Cause one of us is going,
One of us is going down," Loki sang, sweeping his scepter around to knock Thor off his feet, whereupon Thor tried to get back up, only to find that his feet kept sliding out from under him because he was now wearing roller blades.
The black wig finally fell off Thor's head.
"I'm not running,
It's a little different now," Loki snarled, as Thor lunged to tackle where he thought Loki was going to be, only to find that Loki stepped closer instead of backing up, and his elbow met Thor's chin.
"'Cause one of us is going,
One of us is going down!"
"Um, how about down to the training area?" Bruce suggested, louder this time. "You guys might destroy the waffle iron if you continue this up here."
Loki turned to look at him, blinking as if just noticing that he and the others were there, before he grabbed Thor's arm as the thunderer failed to find his balance with the roller blades, and they both disappeared.
There was a moment of stunned silence.
"I can't believe that actually worked," Bruce said.
Reappearing in the expansive, Hulk-proofed space of the training area, Loki let go of Thor's arm and the thunderer's feet flew out from under him.
Growling, Thor finally just ripped the shoes off his feet.
He didn't, however, accuse Loki of cheating, and the caustic response to those absent words festered at the back of Loki's throat.
"Define your meaning of fun," Loki sang, stumbling backwards as Thor came up swinging, managing to hit his shoulder and knock the scepter out of his hands.
No, that wouldn't do. He hadn't yet torn up that suit that was annoyingly similar to his and simply didn't work on Thor's muscled frame and amiable face, twisted in anger as it was.
"To me it's when we're getting it done," Loki continued, ducking Mjolnir to leap to the side, extending like a cat before his hands met the floor and Loki rolled over his head, coming up on one knee to bring the spear around in a sweep that Thor jumped.
"I feel the heat comin' off of the blacktop,
So get ready for another one.
Let's take a trip down memory lane," Loki sang, lowering his voice to whisper "(Do you remember me?)"
Thor almost didn't hear it, as he was preoccupied with a bunch of pineapples that were completely covering the ground around his feet.
"The words circling in my brain," Loki continued.
(I never wanted the throne! I only ever wanted to be your equal! Raw voice and tearful clouded eyes.)
He murmured. "(And what you did to me)"
Thor had taken up the pineapples and began to toss them up in front of him, hitting them with Mjolnir to send them in a drop-serve at his brother.
"You can treat this like another all the same," Loki sang, using the scepter to slice the pineapples out of the air before they could hit him in the face.
"But don't cry like a bitch when you feel the pain!"
Loki was abruptly there in front of him, gleaming steal blade slicing across Thor's cheek.
With a furious roar Thor brought Mjolnir up and into Loki's chest, knocking the smaller god across the room and into the wall.
Looking up from his knees with a sickening smile, Loki didn't even stand up as Thor strode over and grabbed him by the color, lifting him off his feet.
"It's been a long time coming," Loki sang, wrapping his fingers around Thor's wrists. Blue crept across his flesh. "And the table's turned around."
He was dropped back to his feet as Thor released his grip, staring with shock at the dark frostbite burns on his forearms.
"'Cause one of us is going,
One of us is going down."
Thor raised his head as Loki's scepter came sweeping back towards him.
Green eyes glistened wetly.
"I'm not running,
It's a little different now," the slight trembling of Loki's voice was nigh unnoticeable.
Sparks flew. Metal screamed.
"'Cause one of us is going,
One of us is going down."
(Why? asked gloaming blue eyes.)
"This is hardly worth fighting for,
But it's the little petty shit that I can't ignore," Loki practically snarled.
"When my fist hits your face and your face hits the floor."
There were times when Loki was indeed true to his word. This was one of them, Thor thought wryly, as knuckles met his jaw and the floor rushed up to meet him.
And he'd had enough.
"It'll be a long time coming,
But you got the message now.
'Cause I was never going,
Yeah, you're the one that's going down!"
As Loki's boot came towards his face, Thor grabbed it, jerking so that Loki fell onto the floor next to him. There was a cessation in their battle as Loki glared and Thor's eyes softened, their breaths coming in rasping pants.
"My turn," Thor said softly. "Jarvis?"
"Yes Mr. Odinson?" the AI answered.
"Could you please turn on the song Take It Out On Me by Thousand Foot Krutch?"
"Of course."
Guitar, bass and drum started up, before a male voice began singing.
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know anymore
Thought I had
Thought I had it under control
Hear my voice, here it goes
Hear it louder than most
Here it goes, here it goes
(1 2 3 4)
It's not worth it
It's not workin'
You wanted it to be picture perfect
It's not over,
You don't have to throw it away.
Loki made to scramble to his feet, but Thor grabbed his wrist, eliciting a whirling kick from the dark god. Still he didn't let go.
"Listen," he pleaded.
So scream if you wanna, shout if you need
Just let it go (take it out on me)
Fight if you need to, smash if it helps you
Get control (take it out on me)
So scream if you wanna, shout if you need
Just let it go (take it out on me)
Fight if you need to, smash if it helps you
Get control
"You blunderbuss!" Loki shrieked, trying unsuccessfully to wrench himself from Thor's iron-thewed grasp. "You never pay any heed! You're such a fucking hypocrite!"
"Loki—"
"I hate you!"
There was a pop like crackling flames, and Loki was gone, teleporting out of Thor's grip to not-even-Heimdall-knows-where.
Thor hung his head, still sitting on his knees. Blond hair tumbled into his face, and glancing down at himself he noticed that the elegant suit he'd been wearing was in tatters, and that the scarf seemed to be missing entirely.
He suddenly noticed that the song had ended, and another song by Thousand Foot Krutch was playing.
Help me help you they wont be there
Help me help you they won't see
It hurts when you need me
And I can't break your fall
It hurts when you can't see
And it hurts
It hurts when you need me
And I can't break your fall
It hurts when you can't see
And it hurts
And it hurts when you're lonely
And I'm standing right beside you there
And it hurt when you told me
That you told me that you tried this on your own
Hope you never hurt
Hope you never cry
Hope you never lose your way tonight
Hope you never crumble
Hope you never fall
Hope you never throw away the
Drop the ball, watch it fall far below
Suck you in, hold your breath, watch it swing
It hurts when you need me
And I can't break your fall
It hurts when you can't see
And it hurts
Thor dragged himself to his feet, making it perhaps two steps before he stepped into something slimy that oozed between his toes.
Glancing down, he sighed.
The whole training area floor all the way to the doors was covered several inches of tapioca pudding and green paint.
Loki reappeared in the band room.
It was on one of the lower levels of Stark Tower, and was completely insulated, with soundproof walls, not to mention the inside of the entire room was carpeted all the way around, so that they could play their instruments as loud as they wanted without blasting their own eardrums out.
Hands creeping up over his ears to twin his fingers in his dark hair, Loki screamed.
Anger, frustration, hurt, mania.
He screamed till he ran out of air, then took another breath and screamed again. He screamed till his throat was raw hoarse.
And damn it if he didn't feel better afterwards.
Ding dong!
Wrenching his gaze from the TV showing Thor and Loki beating the pulp out of each other, Tony yelped as he glanced at the clock, "Aagh, how'd it get so late! That would be the trick-or-treaters!"
He started rushing about, crying desperately, "Where did all the candy go? Somebody find the candy!"
"You mean this?" Steve asked, holding up a few large plastic black cauldrons brimming with shiny wrapped chocolates.
"Yes, I mean that!" Tony said, grabbing Steve's arm and pulling him towards the elevator. "Come one, guys! We can't disappoint the kids!"
"You're not really going to give them that stuff, are you?" Bruce asked in disbelief, staring at the candy aghast. "The sugar will ruin their pancreases!"
"Uh huh," Tony said distractedly.
Sighing, Bruce grabbed a large bag of apples from the kitchen counter before following his fellow Avengers to the elevator.
This time Tony noticed him. "You're not actually going give them those, are you?" he asked in indignation.
"Yes," Bruce answered, reaching up to straighten his glasses only to find that they weren't there. Instead his fingers brushed his wig.
Oh right. He was dressed as the God of Mischief.
"Apples are good for you," he continued.
"But it's Halloween!" Tony protested, straightening his tie and readjusting his scarf. He seemed perfectly content to let Steve carry all the candy. "Candy is essential to Halloween!"
Natasha slapped Clint's hand as he reached up to rub his eyes.
"Don't mess up the makeup!" she hissed.
He stuck his tongue out at her, before saying, "Pumpkins are essential to Halloween too."
"Jack-o-lanterns and homemade pumpkin pie," Steve nodded in agreement.
Tony snorted. "One, none of us can bake anything worth consumption by any living creature. And two, I wouldn't trust any of you with pumpkin carvers."
"That's not just because we're all dressed up as Loki, is it?" Natasha asked dryly.
"Well, it certainly doesn't help matters," Tony said, before crinkling his brow. "Does anybody know why we don't seem to be more concerned about Loki running around in an a fit of anger with his magic that was probably never really that suppressed in the first place?"
Shrugging, Steve offered, "Because when he's angry he's never done anything worse than hit us with various foodstuffs or random art supplies, and whenever he has something dangerous he purposefully misses us, he's the only one of us who can cook something without burning it or ruining it in some other manner, he could kill us well enough without his magic anyway, he's been inadvertently using his magic to freeze our drinks and you'd already suspected that electric shocks wouldn't do anything after Thor admitted to accidentally zapping his brother with his lightning several times, Loki can sing like a boss, and he's so creatively threatening and not-villainous and his sneezes sound like the sneezes of a cat?"
A pause. "About sums it up," Clint said, as Natasha gave a he's-got-a-point tilt of her head and quirk of her red eyebrows.
"And Fury's not going to be fury-ous about this?" Bruce inquired, smirking slightly as he used Tony's cliché pun.
"Nah," Tony snorted. "Loki showed Fury a few tricks for mollifying the headaches that come from dealing with insufferable people. I think he earned quite a bit of the Director's respect for that."
There was a lapse of silence, but it was a crowded silence—the silence of five people breathing in the cramped and stuffy space of an elevator.
"Jarvis?" Tony frowned. "What's taking this elevator so damn long?!"
The doors opened on cue (because of course they did—Murphy's law, right?), and the Loki'd Avengers tumbled out onto the ground floor, very nearly pushing each other over only to stop when they saw all the faces peeking eagerly through the windows, and the long line of trick-or-treaters starting at the glass door and curling off out of view.
Seeing the Avengers, the crowd (which was primarily girls, but there was a good deal of boys too) started screaming and jumping up and down.
"Remind me why I have a glass door?" Tony asked.
"Because you reinforced it so that no normal human could break in," Bruce answered.
"Right."
There was a pause.
"Who wants to open the door?"
There was an awkward pause.
Doombots? No problem. Latest new crazy person who thought themselves a supervillain? Easy peasy. Loki in a fit? There would be some balking. Hundreds of crazy fanboys and fangirls? The Avengers suddenly had a distinct urge to run in the opposite direction.
Finally Steve sighed, walking over to exacerbated cheering, setting down the buckets of candy and reaching a hand to open the door.
"Really, Stark?" he quipped. "Aren't you used to this thing by now?"
"Do you know why I had us dress up as Loki?" Tony said, and Steve paused, glancing over his shoulder.
"No. Why?"
"Because I found out that that's the most popular Halloween costume in New York. Look outside."
"Already did," Steve shrugged, opening the door.
A torrent of sound enveloped them; cheering and screaming and excited shouting and giggling and laughing and the light of so, so many smiles, lighting up the outcast evening better than street lamps.
"Wow," Clint said after a moment.
The first few fans were practically vibrating with excitement. "Trick or treat!" they chorused, grinning, eyes wide like their wildest dreams were coming true in front of them.
As Steve handed them candy, he shot a glance over his shoulder at his fellow Avengers, that in Steve speak probably said, "Guys, we have a duty, so let's get to it," but in Tony speak said, "Get the hell over here this instant or I will go over there and you don't want to know what kind of fish I will slap you with."
"Okay," Tony said, as they all walked over to help hand out candy (or apples, in Bruce's case), "Who wants to bet that after Loki, the next popular costume will be Iron Man?"
"Twenty bucks says it's Captain America," Clint countered.
"You're on."
And that was all they had time to say before they were by the door and being bombarded by eager questions and giggled confessions.
"Can I hug you?"
"Can I hug you too?"
"Where's Loki?"
"Can we see Loki? Pleeaaaaaaaaaaase?"
"Will you marry me?"
"Can you ask Loki if he'll marry me?"
"I love you!"
"Can I just say thank you for everything you've done for us?"
"I like your costumes!"
"Can I have your autograph?"
"Where's Loki?"
"Can I have Loki's autograph?"
"Calm down everyone," Steve said, raising his hand.
The crowd immediately quieted.
"Spooky," murmured Clint.
"Okay," Tony took over, ignoring Steve's warning glare. "I'm afraid you guys can't see Loki."
There was a collective moan, whining like a wood house in the wind.
Tony sighed. "Just because Loki's in a glass cage, doesn't mean he's a zoo exhibit," he pointed out. "He would not appreciate being goggled at, and you'd all receive the tongue lashing of your lives, which believe it or not you would not enjoy. Trust me."
"But," Steve added quickly, "We will give free hugs to everyone—"
There was a roar of cheering from the crowd, while the rest of the Avengers stiffened at the suggestion.
"As long as you do not trample or strangle or suffocate us, and you and patiently for your turn," Steve finished. "Can you all do that?"
There was a roar of "Yes" and "Of course," and "Hell yeah," and hundreds of thumbs-ups were raised in the air.
"Awesome," Steve grinned. He shot an inconspicuous glare at his fellow Avengers, who regarded him stiffly for a moment, before sighing in resignation.
"Fine," Natasha muttered.
And that, Steve thought with a huge, figuratively star-spangled beam on his face, was a triumph.
"If Loki's not here then, could you give him my hug?" A girl asked, twirling a plastic Mjolnir in her hands as she self-consciously brushed long blond hair out of her face.
"And this present?" another girl pleaded with large blue eyes who was wearing actual leather and metal armor, as she handed something in a short rectangular box covered in Halloween wrapping paper. "I made it myself..."
Tony groaned, face-palming. "Of course—"
"Don't mess up the makeup!" Natasha practically shrieked.
"—this sort of thing would happen. Really, what did I expect?"
Clint smirked. "That you would still be the fan favorite," he suggested, punching the billionaire in the shoulder. "Come one, we all know girls like the bad boys."
"Shut up," Tony growled.
The first song is This Is Halloween, originally by Danny Elfman for the 1993 film The Nightmare Before Christmas, but Loki'd personally prefers the Marilyn Manson cover. The second song is Bad Blood by Creature Feature, the third song is You're Going Down by Sick Puppies, the fourth song is Take It Out On Me by Thousand Foot Krutch, the fifth song is Hurt by Thousand Foot Krutch; and Loki's line, "You're such a fucking hypocrite!" is from the song Fake It by Seether.
If her penname didn't give it away, Loki'd would like to mention that this story is Loki-and-Thor-bromance-centric. Because her mind is Loki-and-Thor-bromance-centric, and so it just happens her writing ends up such as well. That is not to say that there the other Avengers won't play a significant part, it is simply that most of the character development will be between the Norse bros.
This story started without any plan, but she now knows what she wants the goal of the story to be, and how she wants it to end, and she is very excited about it.
She would love to hear anything you feel like saying in a review, and welcomes song suggestions. She listens to all of them, and though she can't promise that she'll include them, she will if a song happens to fit with what she wants in a chapter.
(Because Loki'd is primarily a Loki-obsessed fangirl, she is very good at associating songs with the two gods, and tends to have trouble associating songs with the other Avengers; so if you have a suggestion for a song relevant to one of the others, a sentence or two of explanation would be greatly appreciated. Actually, a bit of explanation for all song suggestions would be greatly appreciated. And it's even better when the songs can relate to multiple characters so they have a sort of reciprocated understanding, since that's part of the goal of this fic: for everyone to realize they're not alone, and are not all that different from each other after all.)