Moving Forward

"Should I cast her out I wonder?"

I had been asleep, but a noise had woken me abruptly. Probably a fist coming down on a table.

"Maybe I should tell her why you helped her so readily," it was Lodan, and he sounded pissed.

"My debt has been long repaid Lodan. I am just saying that she deserves better."

"She will not survive out there with the shemlen!"

"Abigail is human too, if you did not notice."

"I noticed all right! The way she stares at me when she thinks I cannot tell, like I am some sort of animal."

"She has never seen your kind before. If you would talk to her-"

"Are you suggesting I would give up my clan's secrets?" Lodan's voice was dangerously low.

"I am not saying that. But if you teach her the history, tell her stories, she may come to understand that you are no different than she is to you. When she does eventually go out into the rest of Ferelden she will treat everyone fairly."

Silence held for a long while. Then Tanin spoke again, but whispered. I just heard him.

"Abigail needs someone who will lead her through this world until she can make the next steps on her own. She has had everything she has ever known and loved stripped from her. She needs you Lodan, someone honest and good, not tainted like me."

They both went to bed after that, and I fell asleep with Tanin's words echoing in my head.

Tanin left early the next morning. I thanked him for everything, but he just waved me off.

"Anything to keep me challenged my dear. Plus I don't think these old bones have moved so much this spring then in five years. But I was glad to help."

"Will I ever see you again?" I asked.

"Abigail, I do not know that answer any better than I can predict the patterns of the clouds. I need to meditate for a time. But Maker willing, we will meet again soon."

I watched him walk into the trees, then went inside were Lodan was busy with some pastry. I sat down on the bed and watched him. Lodan let me sit there for a while but then spoke up.

"Come one Abigail, if you are going to live here you have to do your fair share of work," he said gruffly.

I was surprised "Live here? With you?"

"Of course! Did you think that I was going to make you leave? If you hadn't noticed, I am no spring halla. In fact, I am old enough to be your grandfather. Plus, where were you planning to go?"

"What's a halla?"

His eyes grew wide and he stuttered, "Well, it looks like a deer except it's pure white and has longer horns…" he sighed in defeat, "you would have to see one to know one. Come here and I will teach you."

"Sounds like fun."

"If your bread tastes good, maybe I will tell you a story." Lodan turned to the stew pot.

I stood up and walked over, "I don't know how to make bread," Lodan opened his mouth but I held my hand up to cut him off, "Only because I never had to learn. I had something back at home to help me with that process. A machine."

Lodan stared at me. I guessed that he was trying to imagine this farfetched machine.

"Okay, I guess we will start slowly and just take our time. With each topic," he said. So I watched, listened, and learned as he went about his work.

Weeks past like that, Lodan taught me how to cook and clean everything. Literally. There wasn't an animal or plant that I could not make into something edible, and there was no surface in that shack that did not sparkle.

Lodan was very hard at first to open up, he only made small comments or left gaping holes between years in the histories. So then I just asked questions about what he told me, and little by little he gave more information, until he was completely open with me. I learned about the immortal people of Arlathan to the fall of the Dales.

But the part I loved the best was the singing. Neither of us could sing well, but he taught me some songs and tales.

"Everyone can sing, Abigail, I just lost my voice some time ago. You just have to find yours."

When Lodan was happy with my housekeeping skills, he went out hunting and searching for plants.

After a particularly grueling drag back of a deer, I said something.

"You know I was not entirely useless before I came here. I can hunt. I do hunt."

He raised his eyebrows. "If that is so, you shall have no problem cleaning this for me while I sit down and watch."

I just shrugged, grabbed his knife, and got to work. The deer skin was a bit tough, but once I was in I had no more trouble.

Lodan was impressed. "My Abigail? My quiet, shy, animal-loving Abigail can hunt? Well, at least you can carve up an animal nicely," he said in mock horror.

"It's just natural order, that's what my uncle taught me anyway…" I slowly stopped speaking.

"He is a wise man then." He patted my shoulder gently. "Wash your hands then and we will see if you can pull a bow!"

I smiled and traveled down to the creek. I hummed a song that was my favourite, a love ballad, and was careful to wash my hands downstream. I was drying my hands when I heard rustling on the bank opposite to me. My head snapped up and I found myself face to face with a point of a sword.

"Get up!" he barked. It was one of the Chasind, the wilder folk of the Korcari Wilds and the other parts of Ferelden's deep forests. His hair was a rat's nest and his eyes seethed with hatred. But the most terrifying part was that he was not alone, a man had an arrow nocked and ready to use, just as crazed looking as his partner.

"Get up! Now! Or I'll leave you limbless!" he spat out. I slowly stood up, trying to look none-threatening.

"I don't have anything of value," I croaked out. I cleared my throat weakly. "I mean you no harm."

"That is not the problem, female," the one with the bow sneered.

"Abigail? What is taking so long? Did you fall in?" Lodan asked with humor.

I couldn't believe it. Now both of us were going to get killed, or worse. The men motioned for me to be quiet. As Lodan came out of the bush though, the Chasind lowered their weapons.

"Lodan. I had not realized we had traveled this close to your home. I promise not to make that mistake again." It was obvious that both men respected the elf.

"Hm, yes. I am sure that you will make sure of that. It's okay Abigail, come home with me will you."

I could not have obliged more. We slowly made our way back to the shack. Lodan could have not made it more obvious that he was furious.

"I am so sorry Lodan. Did I trespass or something?"

"You are apologizing! Ha! Shemlen never cease to amaze me. No Abigail, I am angry at myself. What was I thinking? I thought I could keep you in that house and you wouldn't get hurt! No, not Abigail, the human that leaves no stone unturned to understand the world around her. Not in this forest!"

"I can defend myself," I muttered pathetically, "just not when someone points a very large and deadly weapon at me."

"Tomorrow we will start your lessons. I was putting this off, but I have no choice now. I have a back up blade in the loft, but my bow will be too short for you. I will have to make one for you from scratch."

"Really?" I couldn't believe it. This was like, super secret Dalish information that he was going to use. I felt so lucky and grateful for his kindness.

"Of course! Did you think I was going to make you use some human bow? No Abigail, I will make you a bow that will make anyone from any race envious!"

"I would wish that you called my Abby," I said softly, "Thank you."

He stopped walking, and turned to face me. "Are you alright?" he asked.

I sniffed and looked away. "This place, this country, it's just so harsh and dangerous. You could get killed here and no one could ever know. How can someone like me hope to survive?"

The elf grabbed my shoulders and tilted my head up. "Look at me," he said firmly, "you will be okay. You know why?"

I shook my head and wiped my eyes, "Why?"

"Because I will protect you until you can protect yourself!" and then he hugged me, and for the briefest of moments, I felt safe.