This is so much fun! Fluff chapter! You know you like it. Some in-game talking, some not. Alistair anyone?

Waiting in Suspense

At first my dreams were filled with darkness. Voices whispered with evil intent in my ear, but I couldn't hear what they were saying to me. So close, but always just beyond my reach. The dreams did pass, and I melted into a place where my aunt and I walked in a park during spring time, laughing for no reason.

I awoke that morning to the commotion of soldiers preparing for battle. The clamour of armour and weapons made my stomach turn. Tonight the army would meet the horde for the fourth time that night, and I wasn't ready.

I curled up into a ball, holding my stomach again. It seemed to be a continuing pattern in the past twenty-four hours. Through absolute pure luck I had survived the skirmishes yesterday. That luck could end tonight. I just didn't have the years of experience that any of the warriors had.

Experience didn't help Daveth.

Daveth. The name echoed in my head painfully, his face and Jory's looking up at me from the ground. Both dead. Both a part of more of the dead that would litter the battle field after tonight.

Why must these people die? Can I not get close to anyone here?

The only thing that made me get up was the thought that Duncan was counting on me. So I got up to stretch and face my day.

I found the breakfast line with no problem. I couldn't believe how hungry I was. It wasn't even that late in the day.

In line I was cornered by the kennel master. He told me that the hound was doing much better, and that after the battle I should visit him.

"Maybe if we're lucky, he'll imprint on you!" he exclaimed as he walked away. I couldn't help have a weird picture of Jacob Black in my head at the word "imprint". I really hoped he meant something different.

After getting the serving elf to really pile the goop on for me, I sat down on some steps and observed the goings on of the camp. I noticed people watching me oddly, so I just stared back. Most looked away awkwardly.

Take that fiend. I'll teach you not to stare at strangers. The concept of the battle was obviously affecting my brain.

The rest of the day I preformed odd jobs for people, taking down tents and sharpening weapons. It felt good to be helping and doing mindless work. Well, as mindless as sharpening a dagger could get.

While I worked, I listened to the men gossip. They talked about Loghain and the king arguing about "Maker-knows-what", and how they couldn't wait to go home. I couldn't help agreeing.

I was just finishing a dagger that had not been taken care of well when I had a visitor.

"I don't think that you have the power to beat that dagger into submission. Might as well leave it to the professionals." It was Alistair.

"Saying something about my lack of experience is not a good idea right now." I was thoroughly peeved with the last owner of the weapon.

"Here," he offered. He took the outstretched dagger from me and started working.

"Thanks," I muttered sheepishly. "I'm sorry that I snapped."

"I can see why," he frowned slightly. "Look, I wanted to talk to you about last night."

I watched him work. "What about," I said evasively. Sharp memories from the last night's events started to flood my mind.

Alistair put the dagger down, making me look at him. "About the fact that you just saw the worst part about being a Grey Warden."

"You don't have to do that-"

"Yes, I think I do. You obviously got along well with Daveth. Jory was…different but he was still a good man."

"Yah, Daveth would have loved to be a Warden."

"You really liked him didn't you?"

My silence must have confirmed his suspicions.

"You said something when you were out," I sat ram-rod straight, slight horror on my face. "You mentioned something about "can't do this anymore". What did you mean?"

I was mortified. I could have said anything, anything but that. "I…I've lost a lot of people close to me lately, and now it's like I have to keep everyone at arm's reach, but that's not me. I need people in my life. I feel so lonely when I'm by myself for more than ten minutes." I admitted hopelessly.

He gave a warm smile. "Now you don't have to worry about that anymore. That's another reason I wanted to talk to you. About the others and their behavior last night. They were drinking, and I guess because your different they thought , well, you know," he ended awkwardly.

"Different? What do you mean different?"

"It's the way you carry yourself. You look like you're ready to be everybody's friend. Unfortunately, they figured it was another type of friend…"

"I never noticed." I ran a hand through my hair, disgusted at how oily it felt. I still wasn't used to the "shampoo" I was using now. "I never thought I'd react like that, being scared like a rabbit. I spent two years where being taken advantage of was a real threat. But I thought I had left that part of me behind."

"Sounds like a horrible place," he look disgusted. "Why were you there?"

"Actually, it was where I was going to school." Then I realized that he would have no clue about how university was like. What am I going to say to all of them?

Alistair shook his head incredulously. "Doesn't sound like the best learning environm- Oi! Duncan!"

I followed his line of sight and found Duncan walking toward us. He had a grim expression on his face.

"Alistair," he greeted. "Abigail, the King wishes to see the both of us. We have been invited to a strategy meeting."

"Really? Geez, don't I feel special. Thank you Alistair, I really appreciate it." I gave him my biggest smile.

"Okay. See you Abby," he seemed really down all of the sudden. I raised my eyebrows at his random change of mood, and followed Duncan.

Duncan lead me to an out-of-the-way hall where I could see the king arguing with a man in full silver plate armour. A woman dressed in chantry robes and a circle mage stood off uncomfortably to the side.

"Loghain, my decision is final. I will stand with the Grey Wardens in this final assault," the King put strongly.

"You risk to much Cailan! The darkspawn horde is too dangerous for you to be playing hero in the front lines," the man's gravelly voice countered back. His frown made him seem all the darker with his black hair held back in two braids on either side of his face.

"If that's the case, perhaps we should wait for the Orlesian forces to join us after all," the king said slyly.

"I must repeat my protest to your fool notion that we need the Orlesian army to defend ourselves." The general threw his hands in the air in defeat.

"It's not a fool notion. Our arguments with the Orlesians are a thing of the past. And you will remember who is king."

"How fortunate that Maric did not live to see his son ready to hand over Ferelden over to those who enslaved us for over a century."

I stood beside Duncan. I guessed he was waiting until the two had decided to act more appropriately, given their titles.

"Then our current forces will have to suffice, won't they?" The king narrowed his eyes. "Duncan, are your men ready for battle?"

Men, he says, not warriors. I thought with a sigh.

"They are, your Majesty," he nodded his head slightly.

"And this is the recruit I met yesterday on the road? I understand congratulations are in order," he smiled at me.

I bowed my body a fraction. "Thank you, your Majesty."

He continued. "Every Grey Warden is needed now. You should be honored to join their ranks."

Loghain stood in front of the king. "Your fascination with glory and legends will be your undoing, Cailan. We must attend to reality."

"Fine," Cailan said childishly. "Speak your strategy. The Grey Wardens and I draw the darkspawn into charging our lines and then?"

The general leaned over a table with a map of Ostagar. "You will alert the tower to light the beacon, signaling my men to charge from cover-"

"To flank the darkspawn, I remember," the king finished. "Who will light the beacon?"

"I have men in the tower ready for this. It's isn't a challenging task, but it is vital."

The king looked at Duncan and I. "Then we should send our best. Alistair and Abigail will go."

Loghain looked furious, but I was relieved. I wasn't going to be in the battle.

"Very well your Majesty." I tried not to sound excited.

"Your Majesty," the circle mage started. "The beacon in the tower is not needed. A mage could easily-"

The chantry sister overrode him. "We do not think that is necessary mage. Save your spells for the darkspawn."

Then it was Duncan's turn, and he sounded worried. "Your Majesty, you might have to consider that the archdemon might appear."

"There has been no sightings of any dragon in the Wilds," the general remarked indifferently.

"Isn't that why your men are here Duncan?" the king pointed out.

"I…Yes your Majesty."

The king turned misty eyed. "I cannot wait for that moment. When I stand beside the glorious Grey Wardens after defeating the darkspawn."

Loghain walked out of the hall. "Yes Cailan. A glorious moment for us all."

Duncan motioned to me. "Abigail, when it gets dark, I want you to meet me and Alistair at the Grey Warden camp. Until then, you are free to do as you please."

"Yes Duncan." I took that as my dismissal, and left for my tent.