Author's Note: I know I've been horribly remiss in updating...it's been over a week. I apologize to all of you faithful readers/reviewers and won't bore you with the craziness that my RL turned into this past week, just know it was a nightmare and unavoidable, but I hope to be back to my normal updating schedule soon.

A/N: I don't own GG.

It's Kinda Like Being the Guy on a Date

"Mom, it was the Crucible. Well, not all of it. The part where he showed up at my door, and the car ride to the restaurant those parts were amazing. The rest, well, the rest was horrible," Rory complained as they walked into Luke's.

"First dates are supposed to be horrible, kid. They test you, and see if you're willing to put up with the person for a second date. Second dates are always better."

"Logan wasn't horrible. I think he maybe felt as awkward as I did. I don't think he's ever had the maître d' insult one of his dates before. I was sitting there feeling stupid and every time the guy would say something to me, my brain would simply shut down."

"Luke," Lorelai sing-songed, "We need coffee stat."

"Stat?" Luke asked.

"I'm practicing for my ER audition," Lorelai told him.

"Yeah? Luke asked as he poured their coffee.

"Yep, it's going pretty well. My agent sees big things in my future. Perhaps my own show: Diaries of a Caffeine Addict."

"Oh, well, good."

"We'll be over there," Lorelai pointed to the table Rory had commandeered.

"She looks sad," Luke observed.

"Bad date."

"Bad guy?"

"Not sure yet."

"Where did Logan take you?" Lorelai asked as she set the coffee down on the table.

"Mill on the River," Rory answered."

"Wow. That's quite a first date spot."

"I know! He was trying so hard…I think he feels that he's got to prove something to me. That he needs to show me how much he's really in this with me; does that sound crazy?"

"No, actually, it sounds like some pretty good reasoning."

"The guy actually sounded like some weird genetically combined version of your mother and Michel."

"That sounds bad."

"Mom, what am I going to do?"

"Has he called you yet?"

"No, and I don't know what that means."

"It probably means nothing, Rory. If the date was a horrible as you say it was, he probably doesn't know what to say."

"I had a horrible first date once," Kirk announced.

Rory spun around in her chair, more surprised than she should be to see Kirk standing in front of their table. Judging from the expectant look on his face, he wanted to regale them with his story.

"Did you?" Lorelai prompted, knowing they'd never get rid of him if she didn't.

"I did. It was my imaginary girlfriend. We went to my favorite place to play hide-and-seek. I thought it would be nice to take her somewhere special to me because she was special to me. Then, I could associate my special location with my girlfriend. It seemed like a solid plan."

"What happened?" Rory asked.

"We began the game, and I hid first. She found me quickly; I began dating her because she was smart. Then when it was her turn to hide, I counted to fifty. I looked everywhere for her, but she hid so well that I couldn't find her. I searched for three hours. Finally, I gave up and went home. She came by the next day; she was upset I didn't find her."

"Where was she hiding, Kirk?" Lorelai asked, clearly amused, but trying to remain serious.

"She hid up a tree. The branches were so full that I wasn't able to see her. It helped that she was wearing dark clothes; they made her blend with the night. I don't take Lulu to the spot to play hide-and-seek. I don't want to risk not finding her."

"It's probably for the best," Rory consoled him.

"I think so," Kirk agreed.

Once he was out of the diner, Rory looked at Lorelai. "Don't."

"Did Logan take you to play hide-and-seek?"

"Logan's not imaginary. I did not make him up."

"So, that's a yes to the hide-and-seek?"

"I think he's saving that for a different date."

"At least he thinks ahead."

"Luke!" Rory hollered across the diner.

"Yeah?" he responded from somewhere near the counter.

"Mom misses her misspent youth. You need to take her to 'the spot' to play hide-and-seek. Just make sure she doesn't wear any dark colored clothing."

"Alright, I'll bite," Luke said as he walked over to their table. "Why am I taking your mother to play a game reserved for children not old enough to go to the bathroom on their own?"

"Kirk told us about his really bad first date. Mom likes hide-and-seek. You are her boyfriend. You are to make her happy. Happiness is playing hide-and-seek."

"I see," Luke responded, clearly not seeing.

Lorelai looked up at Luke with her best "this will get me anything I want" look. "Please ignore her. The traumatic incidents of last night and having to hear about Kirk's date with his imaginary girlfriend have clearly made Rory lose what was left of her sanity."

"I'll get you both more coffee," Luke told them. After he'd walked a pace or two away from the table, he turned around, "And I'll ask Kirk for the best location to play hide-and-seek."

"Yes!" Rory exclaimed as Lorelai hid her face in her arms and groaned.

"You were home early last night, young man," Colin observed as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

Logan looked up from his spot on the couch, shook his head, and went back to staring blankly at the wall.

Colin poured a second cup of coffee and brought both his and Logan's over to the couch. "Sit up, you slob."

Begrudgingly, Logan shifted and sort of sat up on the couch, at least he moved enough to allow Colin a place to sit. He had no intention of doing anything other than wallowing in his misery for the next oh, twenty years of his life. He figured that would be enough time.

"Here. Drink this; it will help," Colin ordered.

"It will help?" Logan asked, his voice rough from a bad night's sleep.

"It always does the trick for our girl Gilmore," Colin told him.

"That it does," Logan said, his voice only slightly more bitter than it should be.

"You're going to tell me what happened."

"No, I'm not."

"Logan, clearly something happened last night. Something bad enough to have you lying around on the couch looking as pathetic as I've ever seen you…and you're not even hung-over. Let us try to help you fix whatever it is that went wrong last night."

"We?"

"I called Stephanie. She's stopping for supplies, whatever that means, before coming over here. I'll wake Finn when she gets here," Colin informed his morose friend.

"Oh god," Logan moaned as he covered his face with his hands.

As if on cue, Stephanie opened the door.

"When did she get a key?" Logan asked, one eye peeking out at her from behind his hands.

"Freshman year," Stephanie replied smartly. "You boys were always too drunk to remember where you keys were and the RAs got tired of letting you back into your rooms. Since then, you've made me the responsible member of this little club of delinquents."

She dropped a couple of bags down on the table before making herself a cup of coffee. "Where's Finn?"

"I'll go and wake the poor man. Did you brink something for Finn to drink?"

"I'll make him something up right now," Stephanie told Colin.

An irritated Finn came ambling out of the back bedroom, a smile lighting his face when he saw the drink in Stephanie's hand. "Ah, lovely."

"We have serious things to fix today, Finn," Stephanie told him in her best mother voice, "and I need you to be awake, alert and helpful."

Finn took a swallow of his drink. "Right. What did Logan do?"

"Why do you always assume it's something I did?" Logan asked, irritated.

"Did Rory do something?" Stephanie asked, curious.

"No."

"Did you do something?"

"I don't know."

"Okay, take us through the whole evening. Leave nothing out," Stephanie instructed.

Twenty minutes, three cups of coffee (or if you're Finn three drinks) later, Logan had finally told his friends all of the previous evening's events. Every excruciating detail of the horrible night.

"Well, I'm never going to that restaurant again," Stephanie announced to the boys, who all nodded in agreement.

"What are you going to do about the maître d'?" Colin asked. "You have enough connections to make sure he never does anything useful with his life."

"That is a secondary issue, Colin," Stephanie mildly scolded. "We need to figure out how to get Rory and Logan through a date without it ending in Armageddon."

"It wasn't Armageddon," Logan protested.

"Did you wake up alone, mate?" Finn asked.

Logan hung his head in defeat. He knew his friends were right, but he wanted to believe that he wasn't all wrong with his choices last night. It's not as though he'd sifted through the most romantic restaurants in the area and chosen the one with the maître d' most likely to embarrass his date. In fact, he wanted the night to be special. To take Rory somewhere she'd likely never been before, to demonstrate to her how much he wanted to date her, and only her. Instead, it had turned into the worst date of his life. He only hoped she'd give him a second chance.

"What happened when you dropped her off?" Stephanie asked.

"Nothing. As Finn said, I woke up alone."

"No, I didn't mean did you have crazy monkey sex. I mean, did she seem angry?"

Logan paused before answering. Did she? He didn't think so at the time, but maybe she was angry. He didn't think so. While Rory might not have yelled at the maître d', he knew she held no such compunction about yelling at him. "I don't think so."

"Good."

"Good?"

"It means you still have a chance to make this right," Stephanie told him.

"Not much of one. She agreed to a next time. But, I don't know what to do. I clearly can't plan a good date with Rory and I'm terrified to take her anywhere else because if another maître d' treats her like the one last night, she'll be bailing me out of jail."

"Then have her plan the date," Colin suggested.

"What?" Logan asked.

"That's actually a good idea," Stephanie complimented.

"Don't use such a shocked tone, Stephanie. I am capable of constructive additions to conversations," Colin complained.

"I know."

"You guys actually want me to call Rory and tell her since I screwed up our last date it is now her responsibility to plan the next one?"

Stephanie, Colin and Finn shared a look before turning back to Logan.

"Exactly," they pronounced in unison.

Looking at each face, Logan knew he had no choice. He was going to call Rory and get her to plan their next date. Immediately after, he was going to move to Mexico and change his name to Alejandro.

"Hello?"

"Morning, Ace," Logan answered with as much bravado as he could muster.

"Logan, hi."

"So, how's home?"

"Good. I learned not to wear dark clothing when I climb tress and play hide-and-seek."

"You climb trees?"

"I could."

"I'm sure you could, Ace. So are you busy tonight?"

"Nope. Mom's got a date, so I figured I'd head back to Yale."

"Good. I was thinking that maybe this time you could plan the evening's activities?"

"Don't trust yourself anymore, Huntzberger?"

"Just don't want a repeat of last night. Figure this way you can be sure to enjoy yourself. It's okay if you don't want to, Ace. I understand."

"Logan, stop. It wasn't your fault the guy acted like such a jerk. I'd be happy to plan the evening's festivities."

"Really? Good."

"Come by my room around five. Dress casual."

"You sound like you already have a plan."

"You'll just have to wait and find out."

"Surprises?"

"Bye, Logan."

There you have it! A bit of SH townie craziness. Next chapter...Rory's date! If you still love me in spite of my unintentional hiatus, please review!