**DISCLAIMER – I do not own the characters, they belong to TNT and associated bodies. **
(However I have a wonderful imagination and that belongs all to me, just sometimes Jane and Maura wind up naked in it, and there's not a thing I can do to stop it. Gutted.)
Somebody's crying – belongs to Chris Isaak. Bloody brilliant song.
How to solve a problem like a wedding ring.
Chapter Five: Somebody's crying.
Jane sat at her desk once she had shuffled back from the morgue. She had never expected to feel like this, to feel rejected, shut out, truly alone. Truth be told she had been both selfish and naïve upon her return to Boston. Gabe's unexpected rush to Washington for his debrief hadn't helped matters.
During their time in Iraq, as they became steadily closer Jane had come to fall in love with the Agent, much in the same way she had fallen for Maura. Outwardly quiet and analytical; once behind closed doors and with his guard down, Gabe had shown his soul to Jane. She appreciated his patience, how he would listen to every problem, every fear whilst continually reassuring her that he would never let her out of his sight.
To Jane, it was a phrase you throw about. It wasn't until she was conducting mild interrogation of an officer when the room went white and her ears felt like someone had let off a firework inside them, when she felt him scoop her up and shield her as the room went white again before going black; that she knew. She knew he would always protect her. She knew he would always be watching out for her. She knew at that moment, that he had no hesitation of putting his life on the line for her. She knew she didn't have the feelings for him that she had for Maura, but the feelings she did have were enough; enough to be content. To Jane, she knew the love she had for Maura was the once in a lifetime love you only have with one person. Gabe, well she respected him, she admired him and crucially she trusted him. He was enough. After two years of dancing around the subject, almost losing Jane was all it took for Agent Dean to admit his feelings, eight months later they married in a small ceremony within the base camp.
Jane had no regrets about her decision. She had found a good man with a soul that burned and a heart that beat only for her. It only took those few small minutes in the morgue with Maura to confirm what Jane had know n for a long time; her heart beat and her soul burned, but not for her husband.
-x-
Jane heard the doors to the pen swing. She watched as Maura's heels clicked their way over to Frost's desk; she kept watching as the M.E let her eyes fall on her old desk before raising them to meet Jane's directly; watching her from Korsak's office where the Detective had temporarily set herself up in until an office was cleared for her.
"You've moved," Maura said as she approached the Lieutenant's door.
"Yeah . . . I won't be here full time so it made sense to office-share." Jane responded without looking at the Doctor. She motioned her hand to the chair by the desk as she turned her back to face back into the bull-pen.
"Sergeant I can't take you through this report unless you really do have eyes in the back of your head, which you and I both well know is scientifically almost impossible." Maura opened the manilla folders.
Jane breathed in a lungful of air, clinging to the remaining resolve she had to not just break down. With her hands on her hips and her jaw clenched, her brown eyes darting onto every object in the room to drive back the tears that filled them; she walked past the M.E to the other side of the desk.
"What we got then?"
Maura took one quick look at Jane. Four years hadn't even made a dent on her abilities to read what the Detective was feeling. She kept her eyes locked onto brown ones that couldn't look back at her, for no more than a few seconds; a few seconds enough to prick up every air on the back of her neck as she agonised over the emotional state of the other woman.
Jane sat and clasped her hands together, entwining her own fingers as if they belonged to another, there to support her, the Doctor couldn't help but notice that she linked them by the knuckles so her fingers weren't touching her wedding ring. Maura pondered if the action was deliberate or unconscious, but decided to think it over later.
"Okay," she reached into the folders to pull out four photographs of wide-eyed, super-shiney-smiling college freshmen. "Daniel Matthews, 19. Jared Gellar, 23. Mike Chong, 19 and Phillip Butler, 19. Butler was an exchange student from England on the one year programme."
"So considering it's you with the photos, I'm guessing they're all forever young?"
"You know I don't appreciate guesses," Maura smiled and then cleared her throat. It was too easy to slip back into things with Jane. She made a mental note to refrain from humor. "Two are, as of the past two weeks; as you put it 'forever young'. Matthews was shot with a 9mm and staged in a pose on the college football field. He was at BCU on a football scholarship."
"What kind of pose?" Jane questioned, touching the photograph.
"See for yourself," the Doctor handed her a crime scene image of the young man lying face down with his fingers outstretched towards the touch-line.
"His football ring is missing," Jane pointed out as she eyed the picture.
"Indeed, it was found on the little finger of Jared Gellar," she passed the next crime scene photograph across the table. "Again, 9mm straight through the back of his neck; he was a forensics major interestingly, switched from psych."
"Is he in a lab . . .?" Jane strained her neck to focus in at the scene.
"Boston University School of Medicine. He specialised in bio-eithics. He was a wealthy kid, but his locker, his wallet; all untouched."
"So what was?"
"A signet ring bearing his family crest. He wore it on his middle finger left hand. The one you see in the picture is Matthews' football ring," Maura explained. "That was the call we got on Tuesday. The reason of your involvement centres around the two remaining boys. They've both been missing since last week, not returning from Matthew's memorial service. All the boys lived within a block of one another and have been close since childhood, with the exception of the British boy. There was speculation some months ago," Maura passed a school letter to Jane, "about the nature of the boys . . . level of friendship. There is cause to believe that one or more of them was in a relationship with Jared." Maura raised her eyebrow at Jane. "Interestingly, they were all devout Christians and had pledged chastity."
"But they don't wear the rings, they wear family rings, college rings," Jane rubbed her temples as she attempted to take in all the information. She was glad in a way that it was Maura. The good thing about a talking google was the detail, she saved Jane a lot of reading time.
"Precisely, Korsak has requested that you were fully briefed on the case for that very reason; their families are all both influential and wealthy, with the exception of Matthews'. I'll let Korsak get back to you on where you come in, but I think that's you up to speed." Maura rose to leave.
"Maur . . .Maura," Jane slipped into saying the nickname, "Thank-you. For this. For being able to work with me. I appreciate it. Really, I do." Jane looked at the Doctor, who returned her gaze.
"Like I said, the past is the past. We have to work together and I accept that," Maura forced the scripted words out as she gripped her pen with all her strength, as she put her hand on the door-knob.
"Maura . . ." Jane expelled the name with desperation.
Maura turned, tapping the pen on the handle.
"Jane don't make this harder than it has to be. You want answers? You want me to analyse the past, the present?" Maura's defences went up as she gave the answers she needed to hear herself, not an outright lie as such.
"We cared about each other, we got close, too close . . ." her eyes found Jane's as they both pulled in a sharp breath, " . . . and then we lost it. Whatever was there, we lost it. Unless you've missed it, there is a very obvious, silver reminded on your finger that you have moved on. I won't say this again Jane, you made a decision; you have to live with that. As do I. I'm trying to live Jane," her voice cracked as her bravery slipped and anger kicked in. "You want me to keep crying over you? You forget that crying is all I have done for four years, did you think your disappearing act didn't destroy me from the inside out?"
Maura's voice deepened with anger as Jane's eyed darted away, finally giving into the anguish.
"I do not want to talk about this, I have made that perfectly clear. You made that decision Jane, you. Not me. You turned us into this, and I will neither forget nor forgive it; never. Does that answer your question?" She spat the last statement with a venom Jane had never thought her capable of, shattering the strong brunette into a thousand pieces.
As the M.E gathered her surroundings and exited the office, she couldn't help but choke on a muffled cry as she heard the Detective mourn for what once had been.
**Sorry this update has take a little longer than expected, weaving a story in around Jane and Maura is going to be haphazard and very much trial by error; it will fit in with what is going on between our two fave ladies. I'll admit I hate writing the secondary story part, so the next chapter will be all about the girls again.
Once more, thank-you for all the reviews, as a first timer; they are very appreciated, as are messages. I hope you are all continuing to enjoy the story and I hope to post the next two chapters by the end of tomorrow. Rizzleslove 3
Dustyroad2004. X **