Puck strode down the halls on the first day of school. It was time for his junior year and he was pumped. He'd gotten past all his baby-mama drama from last year, and was ready for another year of badassness. This year wasn't about pregnant cheerleaders and sulky former best friends. It was about another year of kicking asses and taking names as McKinley's resident BAMF. Already, freshman were cowering and hiding behind their lockers. That's right, his reputation preceded him.
Preceded? What the hell?
When Puck got to his locker, Mike was already there, talking to Matt. Mike actually hugged him before Puck shoved him off.
"Dude!" he cried. "It's been so long! How was your summer?"
"I saw you yesterday, dumbass," Puck pointed out. "And every other day of the summer. What's wrong with you?"
"He's just excited," Matt pointed out, restraining Mike, who was now fuckin' bouncing. "You know how he gets."
"Yeah, he gets fucking creepy. Cut it out, Chang."
Mike stuck out his tongue at Puck. "You can't bring me down, man. Don't rain on my parade!"
"I'm not sure what's going on here," came a voice from behind them, "but it's nice to see you bringing Streisand into your life, Mike."
The guys turned around. There was Rachel Berry, in all her crazy glory. She was wearing one of those semi-legal skirts Puck was so fond of, and her usual knee socks.
"Hey," Puck acknowledged, leaning against the lockers. Matt nodded casually. Mike on the other hand, wasn't so cool. He basically tackle-hugged Rachel, who looked pretty damn surprised by the welcome.
"Rachel! How's my favourite girl? How'd you spend your summer?"
Rachel blinked at him. "Didn't we spend the vast majority of the summer together? We were together yesterday, Mike."
"You guys have to stop focusing on the past!" he burst out, waving his finger at them. "Buddha says not to dwell in the past! Are you hating on my religion?"
"Buddhism's a philosophy, not a religion," Rachel pointed out. "And you're not a Buddhist."
"What's your point?" Mike asked, completely serious. Aw, geez.
Rachel opened her mouth and then closed it again. There was no point arguing with Mike, given that he was, you know, an idiot. The dude dated Brittany for a reason.
"I don't know, Mike," she said. "How was your summer?"
"It was awesome!" he announced. "I hung out with you and Puck and Matt, and we just went to a bunch of …"
Okay, enough of that. You're probably wondering why Puck and Rachel voluntarily hung out all summer, with Mike and Matt, no less. Puck kinda wondered that, too, sometimes. But the (weird) truth is that they were all kinda best friends. Here's how that happened:
The entire glee club, plus Schue and Miss Pillsbury, were cramped together in Quinn's hospital room. She'd just handed the baby away to her new parents, and everyone was trying to comfort her. Rachel was standing at the edge, somewhat uncomfortable. She scanned the room, confused when she realized that Noah wasn't among them. She didn't want to interrupt the life lessons Mr. Schuester was currently extolling. She slipped out of the room, and made her way down the hall.
That's where she found Noah, sitting on the ground, his head resting on his knees. He looked up when he heard her coming. The two locked eyes for a minute, and the pain etched into his face took Rachel aback. When he set his head back on his knees, she didn't say a word. She just put her arms around him and hugged him comfortingly. Noah leaned into her embrace, secretly relieved that someone was realizing the effect the adoption was putting on him, not just Quinn.
After that, Rachel had taken him home and they'd lain in his bed for hours. Not doing anything sexual, just lying together. After a couple of hours, he started talking. About Quinn, about the baby, about his dad, about anything. Rachel hadn't monopolized the conversation at all, just listened while he let it out. It wasn't until about two that they fell asleep, and in the morning, Rachel had just smiled, hugged him again, and promised that she'd be around, whenever he needed someone.
And he did. He spent weeks talking only to her. She always listened and never judged, and she knew when to take a conversation further and when to lighten the mood with a joke. She was the best friend he'd had in a while, especially since his former best friend still blamed him for the entire thing, and now seemed to resent Rachel for her friendship with Noah. But she didn't seem to care. She was just concerned about Noah, her crush on Finn having fizzled out a while back.
Mike and Matt came into the picture five weeks after their friendship started. It wasn't a grand thing, no promises that they didn't resent Puck or decrees that they wanted to get to know Rachel. They were dudes. They basically just started sitting next to them and talking. Mike and Matt might not say a lot to strangers, but just try to shut them up with their friends.
Yeah, the two seemed pretty cool with Rachel, but were obviously closer to Puck.
That changed when they realized what a badass she was, though.
The guys were sitting in Puck's backyard one day, trying to figure a final prank to play on the hockey team before the end of the school year. It was a tradition, the two tried to humiliate each other. But the guys couldn't think of anything. They'd been going at it for hours, and the best they could come up with was hiding their clothes during the after-practice-shower. This shit was embarrassing, okay?
They were so absorbed in their debate over what to do that they didn't notice that Rachel had showed up and had been listening to them for about five minutes.
"Boys," she finally called out. The all shushed each other, looking guilty.
"Hi, Rachel," Matt said nervously. "We weren't planning a prank."
Puck groaned. Seriously? This was his think tank?
"I believe you were," Rachel commented. "And I just have one thing to say."
"We know," Mike butted in, looking ashamed. "It's immature and wrong, and we shouldn't do it."
"That's not what I was going to say at all," Rachel said. "I was going to suggest that you consider replacing putting dye in their body wash so that they turn a different colour for a few weeks. Or you could call and have transvestite hookers delivered to them at their sports banquet. The school paper covers that, so the news should spread quickly."
There was what could only be described as shock and awe.
"That's fucking brilliant, Rach," Puck commented. "How'd you come up with that?"
"I've always been good at … retribution," she revealed. "Those are just off the top of my head. Given more time, I could surely come up with better and completely untraceable pranks."
"Dude," Puck replied, "you're a badass."
That's when Mike jumped up and hugged Rachel for the first time. "This is great! We're finally complete!"
"I beg your pardon?" Rachel looked baffled, and slightly uncomfortable with the hug.
"We're finally the tough gang like in the movies!" Mike exclaimed. "In movies, there's lots of gangs. Right now, we're the gang with the two tough guys, me and Matt, who report to the tougher guy, Puck. Those gangs get shot about twenty minutes into the movie. But now we're the gang with the tough guys, who report to the tougher guy, who reports to the criminal mastermind. And the mastermind's a hot chick! Those gangs totally survive. They even live long enough for sequels! We can make a sequel! Join us, Rachel! Let us make a sequel!"
By this point, Mike had thrown himself to his knees, and was making puppy-dog eyes at Rachel. She looked over at Matt, who was trying to discreetly pull Mike to his feet, and Puck, who was looking at her with a new respect.
"Okay. I'll do it. I'll join your group."
Mike started hopping up and down. "Aw, yeah! Here's to the badass bunch!"
"The what?" chorused three voices.
"The badass bunch! We are a bunch of badasses. Say it with me: The badass bunch."
That's when Puck knocked him over the head to calm him down and he passed out a bit.
So yeah. Since then, Rachel had been their mastermind. It was actually totally sweet. She could think up the awesomest things for them to do. Puck had a theory that all that plaid of hers was really just to hide the secret evil in her.
"And that's how I spent my summer," Mike finished. Matt yawned, but Rachel just smiled and nodded like she'd actually been listening. She probably had. For someone who talked so much, she was a great listener.
"Well, I have to get to class," she announced, turning on her heel.
"We'll go with you," offered Matt. He stuck out his arm. "Walk the lady to class?"
"How downright gentlemanly of you," Rachel said in a southern accent, slipping her arm through Matt's.
Puck glared at their arms and followed closely. It pissed him off when Matt or Mike got like that. Just 'cause she was his friend first, and they were acting like they'd known her forever. He just wanted it acknowledged that she'd been his first.
His friend, he means.
Totally.
'Cause it's not like she's his girlfriend or anything. She'd just his best friend. Who's totally hot. And whom he made out with. And dated. But that shit was a million years ago. He doesn't think of her like that anymore. Okay, sometimes he does, but that's just 'cause she's totally hot. Like, he wouldn't be a dude if he didn't think about her like that from time to time. And so what if he's woken up hard a few times, panting her name. And who cares if he pictures her when he's having alone time, or on the – now rare – occasion that he's fooling around with a girl.
It's just 'cause she'd a hot girl. It has nothing to do with her in particular.
Right?
He looked ahead at her tight little ass and the long legs peeking out from her skirt.
Aw, shit.
Okay, this is my first Puckleberry story, and I'll admit that the first chapter is short, but I'm trying to finish before bed. Review, or Rachel will play an evil and untraceable prank on you!