Disclaimer: Once again, I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. All belong to SM.

A/N: Here's the next chapter to make up for not posting for a week. I'm just gonna say wow. Over 4,000 hits! Thank you! You make me giddy. Keep 'em coming! Usually Bella is a school teacher or an author so I'm gonna give her a different occupation if that's alright with you. Tanya will pop up again. She feels that Edward owes her. But for what? Hmmmm...Edward has no idea what she wants. You'll find out I promise. I'm not sure when the chapters will be posted. It depends on my beta. She's gotta look it over and give me advice on what is missing and how many typos I make. It helps alot and your opinions help me tons. Someone asked me if Edward actually told Bella that Tanya was nice when you get to know her. Yes he said that. He is selfish and delusional but he'll get better. But that was chapter 2 so read on. :)

On with it!

Previously:

I looked at the screen.

Inbox (1).

I clicked on it.

BPOV

Three weeks.

It's been three weeks. Three agonizing weeks since I left him. I miss him so much sometimes, I often contemplate whether or not to go back to him but then I remind myself of what he's done to me. Then I get angry and want to throw something. I mean what the hell is wrong with him? Did he actually think I would let this slide? That I wouldn't get tired of it and leave? Then I think about the night I left and the look on his face when he walked into the room and saw me packing.

Confusion.

Shock.

Fear.

Pain.

Desperation.

When I told him I couldn't do it anymore, the tears. God, I had never seen a man cry so much in my life as he begged me not to go and that he would get rid of the skank. I had to stay strong and let him know that it was either me or her. I kissed him, wiped his tears, and left. I got to the bus station and got a ticket to Forks and waited. I must have looked like a mess because I was being stared at as soon as I took my seat in the back of the bus. I'd pulled out my mirror and gasped. My hair was a catastrophe and my eyes were all puffy and my nose was running. My dad met me at his door and wrapped me in a warm hug and I broke down again. I told him about what happened and he told me he was going to castrate Edward but I told him it wasn't needed, that we were both in enough pain as it was so he didn't need to hurt Edward more.

I've been a swirl of emotions this whole time. I haven't talked to anyone from Seattle since, especially him. I don't answer his texts, or calls and I haven't been on my e-mail forever. But I doubt he would e-mail me. I always wondered what he was doing.

Is he still sad that I left?

Is he with her right now?

Is she out of his life? And if she was, would she try to come back?

Does he miss me?

Has he told his family and do they hate him?

Does he think I hate him?

I could never, ever in a million years hate that man. I hate what he did but I could never hate him. I loved him and always will no matter what happens. He was everything any girl would want besides having a bitch on the side. God I hate that woman with a fiery passion. She fucked up my life royally and I wanna kill her for it.

The smell of coffee broke me out my thoughts and I realized I was still in bed. So I got up, went into the bathroom, brushed my hair, washed my face, brushed my teeth, and grabbed a robe from the closet because it was cold and all I was wearing was a t-shirt and a pair of my friend Jake's basketball shorts. I put my slippers on and headed downstairs.

"Hey, Daddy," I smiled when I saw him sitting in his usual chair, drinking coffee and reading the paper. My dad was tall, he had dark brown hair, graying a little at the temples, brown eyes, and a mustache. He the Chief in Forks and been since I was little. He was a great officer and even though he thought otherwise, judging how abruptly my mom took me away from him when she left for Phoenix, he was a great dad, too. My mother, Renee, was an entirely different story. A real trip. She was erratic, flighty, and always on the move. She never used to settle down until she met Phil. Now she lives in Florida with him and I hardly see her. But she's still my mom and I love her.

"Mornin', Bells," he replied with a grin as he looked at me. Even though he would never admit it, I knew he loved it when I called him 'daddy'. It reminded him of when I was a little girl. Usually, I used 'dad' or 'Charlie'. But it always cheered him up when 'daddy' was spoken. "Any plans for today?"

"Hmmmm," I hummed, "maybe. I'll probably go to La Push with Jake and Leah." I went over to the coffee pot and poured myself a mug and went to sit next to him. I took a sip. It was good. "I didn't know you had it in you, dad. This is good."

He looked at me and laughed. "Hey, I may not know how to cook much, Bells, but I can make a damn good pot of coffee." I chuckled. He didn't know how to cook but he could make coffee, I'll give him that. He usually went to the diner for dinner but now that I had been staying with him, I cooked. A nice home cooked meal was always good once in a while. "Well," Charlie grunted as he got up, "I'm gonna head out. Got work to do." He walked over and kissed my hair and hugged me. "Bye, honey, love you."

"I love you, too, Dad. Have good day." He smiled at me as he grabbed his gun and belt and walked out the door. As soon as I heard his cruiser drive away, I ran upstairs to get in the shower. I liked the water hot. I washed my stress away. I turned the water off and grabbed a towel off the hook, wrapped it around my body, used my hand to wipe some of the steam off the mirror, and started to dry my hair. I never had to do much with my hair, just dry it and brush it and it would look okay. Edward loved my hair. Dammit, Bella, stop thinking about him. I sighed and sat on my bed to put on my moisturizer. Gotta keep the skin soft. I walked over to my old dresser and pulled out a thick, purple sweater and some dark blue skinny jeans and some socks. I put the sweater on, smoothed it over my torso, put on the socks and the jeans. They looked like a second skin, almost. I wasn't trying to impress anyone, I was dressing warm because it's cold outside. The middle of November and I wasn't a fashionista like Alice was. She would do anything to make me over but I would never let her.

I smiled as I thought of Alice's quirky personality as I walked downstairs. I really miss her. I would probably call her later. Just as I was finished putting my boots on, someone knocked on the front door.

"Coming!" I hollered. I walked to it and opened it, showing Jacob and Leah. They were my best friends in high school and I hadn't seen them in a while. Leah squealed and hugged me, Jake kissed me on the cheek and picked me off the ground in another hug. I squeaked and hit his shoulder. "You're gonna suffocate me one day, Jake." He already knew about Edward and understood why I would leave after I told him what happened. However, he didn't know what Edward looked like in case he met him sometime and he couldn't kick his ass.

He laughed. "Ready to go?"

"As I'll ever be." I took a deep breath and let the icy air wash over me. I loved Fall. Leah led us to her SUV and Jake got in the driver's seat, Leah next to him and me in the back behind her. As I looked up I saw Jake looking at Leah and I knew he was in love with her. He had been since he met her his senior year in high school. I wouldn't blame him. She was a beautiful girl with long, dark, straight hair and big dark eyes, full lips and curves. I kept wondering when he would make his move as Leah looked at him and smiled. I was a little jealous because all he wanted was Leah and the man I loved wouldn't make up his mind.

"So, Jake, you layed one on Leah yet?" I chuckled. Leah gasped, turning a bright shade of red. Jake eyes got wide. "Oh, come on you two, you know there's something between you. I'm not blind. Well, Jake, have you?" He just looked at me.

"Um...well, uh," he stuttered.

"Twice," Leah whispered, blushing even more and looked at her hands.

"REALLY?" I shouted, excitedly. "Awww, you guys! That's so sweet. When ya gettin' married? Jake looked like he was losing oxygen and Leah looked at me with her mouth open. I laughed. "I'm kidding. Jeez, breathe Jake."

"Well hell, Bella, what kind of question is that?" he said.

I shrugged. "Just making conversation."

Out of nowhere, I watched as Leah looked at him, grabbed the back of his neck and kissed him as I gaped. He immediately responded cupping her face, deepening the kiss. I looked away to give them some privacy. I missed being kissed. Leah was the one to pull away first, Jake still looking dazed.

"That's three," she whispered, licking her lips. Jake smiled and laced his fingers with hers after starting the car as I smiled. "Oh, I'm a matchmaker!" Leah laughed. Jake is an attractive man. He's over 6 foot, short black hair, a lighter shade of brown eyes, sculpted jaw, nice lips, and a muscular, toned body. He was bigger than Edward but that was okay because I loved how Edward was built.

Dammit, I was thinking about him again.

"So, Jake what's on the agenda for today?" I asked.

"Um...Dinner and a beer afterwards?" he asked me and Leah. We both nodded. He smiled and kept looking at the road. He later pulled up to a Chinese restaraunt. As soon as we walked in we were met with a loud "Hey!" I looked up and saw Sam Uley walking over to us, waving. I looked over his shoulder and saw Emily, Leah's cousin sitting at a table. She smiled at me and waved. Leah tensed up and I guess Jake felt it because he grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze.

Emily is the reason her and Sam weren't together anymore. Leah walked in on Sam fucking Emily against the bathroom wall at her mother's house. She was heartbroken because Sam, who claimed to love her, was cheating on her with her cousin and best friend. They tried to apologize but Leah never forgave them. Her and Emily weren't close anymore bcause Emily hurt her and she didn't stop seeing Sam after. They got married and had a baby so Leah didn't want to be around Emily or Sam anymore. I could understand some of her pain.

"Jake," I hissed. "What is this?"

"I didn't know they would be here, Bells," he whispered and looked at Leah and cupped her face and shook his head. "I didn't know, Lee. I swear, baby." She nodded and kissed his hand. A tear fell down her cheek. The pain was still raw, I could tell. Jake wiped it away and wrapped her in his arms, whispering "It's alright" into her hair. I glared at Sam and he stopped walking, his smile gone as he looked at Leah. His head drooped. He looked really sorry. I smiled at him, putting my hand up, signalling for him to wait.

He waited. I looked over at the Jake and he was brushing her hair back, wiping her eyes, and kissed her softly. "That's four," I whispered, trying to lighten the mood. They both smiled.

"Hey Jake, Leah," Sam greeted.

"Hey, man," Jake replied. Leah nodded at him. "You wanna sit with us?" I looked at Jake and Leah. Jake looked at Leah and she nodded, focusing on the floor.

"I guess," I piped up. Sam led us to the table, Emily stood up and came over to hug me. I hugged her back. She tried to talk to Leah but Leah placed herself at the farthest chair at the table and Jake sat next to her. Emily's eyes filled with tears and fell down her cheeks. Sam immediately looked at her but she just waved him off. Emily loved her cousin but she knows she hurt her by sneaking around with Sam and then marrying him, shoving the knife deeper into Leah's heart. Emily dried her tears and tried to smile but it didn't last long. She missed her cousin, she was her bestfriend.

The waiter came over and we ordered our drinks. It was a buffet so we didn't order food. Two hours later, we were all laughing, except Leah. She only smiled. She was uncomfortable, Jake squeezed her hand. "So, Jake, you with Leah now?" Sam asked. Jake nodded. "Yep. She's my girl." Leah smiled and kissed his cheek. The check arrived and Sam pulled out his card to pay for it and I told him I would pay him back but he only shook his head.

When we were walking to the car, I turned around and saw Emily running after us, in tears again. "Leah! Leah, please!" she was sobbing. Leah turned around, shocked. She saw who it was and she sighed, defeated at trying to avoid her cousin and her eyes teared up. Emily stopped in front of her and grabbed her hands.

"Leelee, please, I'm sorry I hurt you. I can't stand that you hate me. Please talk to me!"

"Em," Leah sighed, "I don't hate you."

"But you won't speak to me or look at me. Lee, you used to be my best friend. Why can't we start over. I'll do anything!" Emily whimpered.

"You can't do anything. It's been done. The damage has already been done."

"Leah," Emily cried, "Sam regrets what he did-" Leah stopped her.

"I don't give a flying fuck about Sam, Emily! I have Jake. I'm over him. What hurt me more was that you were screwing him behind my back and you didn't even tell bother to tell me! And when I found out, you didn't say anything to explain yourself. I didn't know if you were shocked or scared you got caught. You know what you did? You fucking cried! You had no reason to cry! I was the hurt one. You were fucking my boyfriend. My own cousin! And you didn't stop seeing him after that. And to twist the knife and break my heart further, you married him! And you got pregnant. I felt like I was dying inside while you got engaged. You're my cousin Emily! Cousins and best friends don't do that to one another. I was so stupid to believe he loved me but I was more stupid to believe you wouldn't hurt me. You're supposed to love me, to choose me over him. I was so wrong."

Leah looked so defeated as Jake held her. I felt like crying for her pain. Emily was full on sobbing as she listened to how Leah felt all this time. She kept in quite well until now. She deserved to have love and be loved. I was grateful for Jake's love for Leah.

"Leah, please," Emily whimpered, "I do love you. I love you. You're my flesh and blood and I want to be in your life again. You have to forgive me, please, Leelee!"

Leah shook her head, more tears rolling down her face. "I forgive you, Em. I do but I can't forgive what you did to me." She turned and got into the car. Emily tried to follow but I stopped her. "Give her time, Em.

"She's my best friend, Bella. I love her," she blubbered.

"I know, Em. Just give her time and she'll talk to you."

"Tell her I'm sorry. Tell her I'm sorry and I love her. Please?"

"I will." I hugged her and rubbed her back. She looked at the window and me then walked to her husband as I got in the car and we drove away. Jake dropped me off and I started making some dinner for my dad. As soon as I'd finished, I left him a note and walked upstairs. I went into my room and looked at my laptop. Maybe I should look at my mail.

I went over to it and opened it up connecting to the Internet. I got on the website, typed in my ID and password and logged in.

Inbox (1). I clicked on it and pushed back my hair before looking. It was from him.

TO: BMSwan

FROM: EACullen

Subject: Missing you.

Hi baby,

I am writing you another email since you won't answer my calls or texts just to say hi and tell you I miss you. I do miss you, baby. So much. I know you said you wanted

time but I'm miserable Bella. God that's the first time I have said your name since you left. It made me break down everytime. I'm not trying to guilt you, you know? I just wanted you to know how fucking sorry I am for making you feel like you weren't enough for me because you were. You more than enough. I got rid of Tanya today. You were right, she is a bitch. She threatened to end me or something. I don't know what she meant but I think she's crazy. It's been three weeks and I just want you to let me know if you're safe and warm and happy. I know I'm not. Again, not trying to guilt you, sweetheart.

A part of me says that if you decide to move on I'd be happy for you but the other part of me, the selfish part doesn't want that and would hate it if you did. Have you talked to Ali yet? They hate me. When I told them what happened, my mom slapped me, my brother punched me in the eye, Rose hit the back of my head, and Alice punched me in the jaw. Jasper and Dad just looked disappointed and they called me a selfish prick and made me leave the dinner. It hurt. I don't blame any of them. I deserved it. Did you tell your dad? I bet he wants me dead, huh? I would if I was him. I absolutely fucking loathe myself, baby. I'm an ass for hurting you and I regret it completely. I found a sweatshirt of yours tonight. It smells just like you. I'll get to sleep tonight surrounded by you. I miss you, babygirl. I love you so much and I hope you come back to me.

I love you.

Yours always and forever, honey.

Love,

Edward

And I'm not miserable? What the hell? Oh, yeah he doesn't know that. I haven't talked to him. Duh! And I doubt his family hates him. I'm excited he got rid of Tanya!

I emailed him back.

TO: EACullen

FROM: BMSwan

SUBJECT: re: Missing You

Hi, honey.

I miss you, too. And I'm miserable without you, too. I do need time but I love you all the same. It's hard to say your name without breaking down for me as well. I don't feel guilted in any way. I am so glad to know you got rid of Tanya but it's going to take time. She is crazy. No I haven't talked to Ali but I aim to and I'm sorry you were injured but I don't think they hate you. Nobody could because you're easy to love. You really are and I wouldn't know how to move on and won't because I love you too much. No my dad doesn't want you dead, but he did in the beginning. I've been having a good time here with friends and my dad but I am homesick and I don't know when I'll be back but I will come back to you and hopefully we can start over after all this is done. You did hurt me Edward. God do I miss you. I haven't slept well either. You have to know that it hurt me endlessly, knowing you had someone else. I know you never meant to make me feel not wanted or enough for you but no matter how much you claimed to love me, it was still how I felt. You had her with you probably more than you were with me and I constantly feared for the end of us. I don't like I repeat DO NOT like sharing you, Edward. If you do it again, I will leave you for good. I'm not gong to sit back and watch you play with my heart again. It scares me to leave you but if you force me to, it won't have a good outcome.

You found my sweatshirt huh? I was looking for that. I miss your scent around me too.

You gotta give me time, babe. I promise I will return.

I love you always,

Bella

I gotta text Ali.

My phone rang and I looked at the caller ID. Speak of the devil. (Bella in bold.)

Hey Al!

Hey Bells, I miss you. When are you coming back?

I miss you too. I don't know when I'm coming back.

Have you talked to Eddie yet? He's sad all the time. The bitch is gone though! Did he tell you that? Oh and I punched him. I apologized, though.

I got an e-mail. I know he's sad and I am too. I'm really glad Tanya is gone. I know you punched him.

Hey, do you wanna come back for Thanksgiving? Bring some friends and your dad.

Really? You should meet them. But Ali?

Yeah Bell?

Please don't tell him. I wanna surprise him.

Ok Bella. I won't. When you gonna come? I wanna see you and I'll set up rooms. Who ya bringing?

Well, my dad and myself and two others but they'll probably share a room.

Ok! Three rooms. I can't wait Bells. Bye! I love you.

Love you too, Ali. Bye.

I hung up and called Jake. He wanted to go and he agreed to bring Leah. Next, I asked my dad and he agreed immediately. Turkey and a game? He loved the idea that he wouldn't have to eat at the diner. Thanksgiving was in three days so we leave tomorrow. I started packing and told my dad to. I was excited. After I finished packing, I went to bed dreaming of turkeys, oddly.

- - *S* - - *S* - -

I knocked on the door of the Cullen home, my dad and friends behind me. The door flew open and Ali leapt at me in a mass of black hair and arms. I laughed when she squealed and hugged me then he held me at arms length to look what I was wearing.

"Bella, you look so pretty!"

"Thanks, Al!"

I was wearing a dark blue above the knee length dress with gray leggings and ballet flats. She led me to the kitchen and was greeted by the family. Esme and Carlisle hugged me, Jasper kissed my cheek, Rose hugged me softly and Emmett cut off my air supply, spinning me in his arms. I then introduced my friends and dad to them. They led us to the table and sat down. Carlisle looked at Charlie and asked him what he did, they ended up talking about their jobs. They both had jobs that somehow saved lives. Leah had to use the restroom so Esme pointed it in her direction.

"So, Jacob," Carlisle asked, "How long have you known Bella?" Jake grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

"Well, her father and my father are friends so it was only a matter of time until we were as well." I laughed because it was the truth.

"And do you have a girlfriend, Jacob?"

Jake nodded and replied, "Yes sir, she went to the bathroom."

"She's very pretty, son" he smiled.

"Thank you." I turned my head to the sound of the front door closing and Alice raced out of the room and I tried to see who it was.

"Wait, wait." I heard Ali whisper loudly. The footsteps got closer and I smiled at Esme.

"Hey, ma, I-" I knew that voice. It was Edward. I looked up at him slowly. "Bell? Baby, what-" he stopped and looked at Jake then at me and then at Jake's hand on top of mine. I shook my head trying to explain and jerked my hand away from Jake's grasp. It didn't matter, though because he already saw.

"Honey."

"Bro."

Esme and Emmett talked at the same time. My eyes started to sting from the oncoming tears. I saw pain wash over his face, his beautiful green eyes filled with tears and fell. He looked at me and nodded like he understood what was happening but he he had it all wrong.

"Um, I uh...I'm gonna...yeah. I gotta go," he said hoarsely, his voice filled with tears. He ran a hand through his hair and his shoulders slumped. he hung his head. I was frozen in fear as I watched him turn to walk away. Oh, God. No! I got up out of the chair and ran to chase after him but as soon as I hit the foyer, he was gone.

I was too late. I slid to the floor and sobbed.

Everyone ran in to the room and Jake knelt next to me, the rest looking worried, Leah as well. "Bells, what happened? Why was that guy crying?"

"He saw your hand on mine," I whimpered.

"So...Did he hurt you? Why are you on the floor?" Alice walked to me with tears in her eyes and gave me a box. "Here, Bells, he had this made for you."

I opened it. It was a matching bracelet to my necklace. I held it to my chest and the tears came harder.

"Bella, did he hurt you?" Jake urged. I shook my head. "Then what's wrong?"

"That was Edward, dude," Emmett answered him.

"I'm pretty sure I hurt him," I whispered. Realization washed over Jake's face. "Oh, fuck."

God, what am I going to do?

A/N: Should he suffer still?

Lionlamb91