(See the first chapter for disclaimer, notes, spoilers, etc.)

Chapter 12: "Aftershock"

The world is crumbling to dust around me and there's only one thing I can think of. I wrench myself away from Annie and bolt across the nursery. Olivia spins around, her eyes wide as she clutches our grandson in her arms. Speaking isn't possible, not with the roar of the earthquake drowning out everything. She looks up at me for the briefest of moments before I throw my arm around her and drag her into the doorway. My arms are around her a moment later, hugging her close so that Trey is cocooned between us. Olivia must be wearing flat sandals because she fits neatly beneath my chin as I cover her and our grandson with my body.

There isn't anything to hear, only to surrender to the deafening noise. I turn my face into Olivia's hair, reaching up to cover the exposed parts of her head with my hands. A vise grips my heart as I realize I can't absorb her into my skin the way I want to, the way I need to to keep her and Trey safe. An absurd breath later, I realize I can smell her hair.

Almond milk.

Still. After all these years.

Memories flash before my eyes like lightening and, in the insanity of our waking moment, I surrender to them. What other choice do I have?

Olivia, the first time she stayed the night in my bed. The way she sighed in her sleep, her skin cool to the touch as she slumbered in my arms. The way her hair brushed against my chest as I prayed for each day to end like this for the rest of my life.

Olivia, the first morning we woke up as husband and wife. The way mist hung in the bathroom, the lingering scent of almond milk dancing in the air. The way she stood at the sink, her silk robe loosely belted as she combed her wet hair. The way it felt to wrap my arms around her waist from behind as she hummed the chorus of "Daydream Believer".

Olivia, laying in my arms on our last Christmas together. The way my fingers danced up her arm, brushing her dark hair aside. The way the soft flesh of her neck felt against my lips. The way her throat vibrated as she moaned my name into the afternoon sun.

Olivia, when I told her our baby was dead. The way her bloodcurdling scream echoed in the hospital room. The way her palm slammed into my chin as she twisted in my arms, a pain that didn't compare to the agony consuming her. The way I buried my face in her hair as her scream gave way to gut-wrenching sobs.

Trey's ear-splitting cry echoes in the sudden silence and I look up slowly. He was crying. If I could hear him crying, it was over. If he was crying, he was alive. Alive. I look down, cupping Olivia's face as I turn it up to me. She's trembling and pale, but alive. "Are you alright?" I ask, hearing my question come out as a panicked shout. I run my hands over her head and down her arms, checking for signs of injury. Nothing. She was fine. She was perfect and unharmed.

As she nodded, a voice from behind me shrieked, "Oh my God, my arm! MY ARM! THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!" I glance over my shoulder, blinking past the thick dust clouding the air. Annie's eyes are wide as she clutches her forearm to her chest. Blood was trickling between her fingers as she burst into tears. "THE CEILING FELL ON ME!"

"Alright, alright," I murmur, turning back to Olivia. "Is Trey hurt?"

She shakes her head and I see her throat working. "No, he's fine." Her voice shakes as she looks up at me, her blue irises bright as she hugs the wailing infant to her chest. "Oh my- Gregory, you're bleeding!" As she cradles Trey, her free hand comes up to my forehead. I reach up, our fingers brushing together. She inhales sharply as a sticky warmth coats my fingertips.

"I'm fine," I say, using my tie to wipe her fingers clean. She watches me warily as I crouch down, looking at my grandson. He's red-faced and screaming, his entire body trembling in Olivia's arms. "Just a scratch."

"Well, this is not a scratch!" Annie shouts, tugging on my arm. "Gregory, I need to go to the hospital! NOW!"

I nod, standing tall. "Yes." My eyes meet Olivia's as I announce, "You're coming with us. You and Trey."

"Gregory-"

I turn to my wife, guiding her and Olivia out of the room. "I'm not leaving them here," I snap, ripping the tie off my neck. The house buckles and groans around us as I take Annie's arm and wrap the silk tightly around it to stop the bleeding. She whimpers and leans against me as she continues to sob. "We could've died!" I hear her wail.

As she sobs, I look past her to Olivia. She's standing quietly, dust clinging to her hair as she drapes a blanket over Trey. A moment later, she coughs, choking as she breathes. The air is getting thicker by the moment and God knows what we're inhaling. "We didn't," I hiss, taking my wife's hand and leading her to the stairs. "Come on. We have to get out of here. All of us."

Trey's eyes are wide as he takes in our surroundings. For an absurd moment, I think back to the parenting books I devoured when I was pregnant with Caitlin. When could babies begin to see color? My mouth tightens as I draw him in against me, not able to remember the age, but comforted by the fact he would never remember this. He would be innocent, spared from all the fallout of this earthquake. This chaos.

Too many people are packed into the Emergency Room, covered in various stages of injury and blood. Dusty debris clings to everyone, their eyes standing out like spectral orbs. Voices shout against one and other, rising to an indiscernible volume of cacophonous proportions. Yet, my grandson just watches it all quietly, barely uttering so much as a whimper.

Seating is limited, but, somehow, Gregory managed to find us the corner of an unoccupied stretcher. My eyes narrow, remembering the way his hands found my hips to lift me and the baby onto the raised cushion. How many times had he clung to me like that over the years? I shake my head, chasing that thought away as Trey's eyes turn up to my face. And, I smile, marveling at how content he is despite the pandemonium around us. Content and unharmed in any way. "You're still perfect, aren't you?" I say softly. "My perfect darling boy."

He was safe because of Gregory. I was safe because of Gregory. I gently rub the baby's stomach as I remember the way Gregory held me close, shielding the baby and I with his body. The way his arms wrapped around me, drawing me close enough to be reminded of the way his aftershave clung to his skin.

If it wasn't for Gregory, Trey and I could've died.

The baby coos and I look up, finding myself caught in the orbital pull of Gregory's dark eyes. "Still ok?" he asks. I nod, feeling his gaze stray from our grandson to scan the length of my body. I'm still nervous as he stands before me, my foot brushing against his leg. I don't know if it's because I'm nervous of what he'll do...or nervous about what I'll do.

"Yes," I force myself to say. I sit Trey up on my knee and I watch, fascinated, as Gregory crouches down to his level. His face lights up as he watches our grandson, chucking the baby's chubby chin. Other than the butterfly bandage and the angry wound on his forehead, Gregory appears to be uninjured. Trey squeals in delight, a ray of sunshine in an otherwise dismal situation. I chuckle and lean forward, kissing the baby's head. My eyes meet Gregory's over our grandson's downy blonde hair.

"How about you?" he questions as he stands slowly.

Can I tell him that I don't know? I can't even begin to sum up how I feel. Scared. Confused. Relieved. Terrified. Sick. Alive. Lonesome. Home sick. Devastated. Hurt. Grateful. He watches me closely and, for a moment, I panic. He always knew what I was thinking just by looking at the expression on my face. I clear my throat and look down, letting our infant grandson separate us. "I'm ok too," I say softly.

The lobby doors bang open and a shrieking siren drowns out any response he was going to offer. I feel Trey stiffen as the noise startles him, his eyes wide. I draw him back against me, my lips against his ear as I comfort him. I look up when the siren fades away and ask quietly, "How is Annie?"

His face turns and he glances down. "She'll live," he says flatly. Our eyes meet tentatively a moment later as he admits, "She needs a few stitches. But the doctor cleaned out her cut and he doesn't think it will be infected."

I nod and he says nothing more. I wouldn't admit this aloud to anyone, but it's still odd to think of another woman as his wife. Never mind the fact that it's Annie. And yet, what did I think he would do after I divorced him? Sit around and pine for me? Resign himself to a life of solitude?

"-the children."

"What?" I look up. "What about the children?"

He moves to stand next to me and leans against the wall, exhaling deeply. "The mobile phone network must be overloaded. I can't get a signal, so I haven't been able to reach the cruise ship."

His words sink in as I sit up straight. "Do you think they're safe?" I ask, my pitch rising as my stomach lurches. We've already lost two children. There was no way God was cruel enough to take our remaining two as well. His face his unreadable and he hesitates before he nods quickly. Too quickly. I inhale sharply, feeling suddenly dizzy. On my lap, Trey flails his arms and giggles, blissfully unaware of what his grandfather wasn't saying. But, I'm not afforded that grace. I can read the silence all too well. "Gregory," I gasp, feeling the blood drain from my face, "what if-"

"Don't," he says quickly and I can't help but hear the pleading tone. "Please don't think that."

His hand drops to my shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. I nod as the baby leans back against me and turns his face up to mine. His head presses into my chest as I lean down and kiss his forehead. Hot tears sting my eyes and a shudder goes through me. But, Trey just laughs and the sound brings a reluctant smile to my face. I sit up and breathe deep, still conscious of the weight of Gregory's hand on my shoulder.

I can't help it.

In the face of the uncertainty surrounding our children and with the shifting sands of a tremulous present beneath our feet, I swim to the one calm port I can reach. Gently, I lean my head against Gregory's hand, his knuckles brushing against my cheek. The strength of his hand increases and his shadow falls over me as he steps closer. His free hand hovers over me, dancing nearer to my knee.

Surely, we can have this? This one moment of comfort and peace in a world where we are otherwise at the mercy of the fates.

"Gregory?"

We jump apart as another voice asks, "Olivia?"

I look up and Gregory clears his throat as Charles and Colin near us. Charles hobbles forward using his eight iron as a cane and Colin's arm to steady himself. My head spins and I lean back, drawing Trey in as I vaguely listen to the three of them swap earthquake stories. "Are you alright? That cut looks ghastly," I hear Colin say. Gregory grumbles a reply as a nurse arrives with a wheelchair for Charles.

"This way, Mr. Lakin," the nurse says, guiding him into the chair. "We'll need to get you to Radiology so we can get an X-ray on your ankle."

Trey squeals as they leave and Colin looks down, his face brightening as he touches my hand. "You're not hurt, are you?" I force a smile and shake my head, avoiding Gregory's stare. I can feel it, but I don't meet it. "And, this little chap?"

"All is well," I say softly. My eyes meet Colin's, his palm warm and comforting against my hand. "He's a very brave little boy."

"I'd think he takes after his grandmother in that regard," he says quietly, a small smile dancing on his lips. As I smile in reply, I can feel the disgust radiating from Gregory and I can't look up at him. I just can't. His shadow still looms over me, the suddenly familiar tension swelling between us again. I shift uncomfortably as he clears his throat and I know he's getting ready to speak. Whatever good existed between us just a few moments ago is gone. Nothing more than a memory.

As Colin gently squeezes my hand, a loud voice booms out, "Gregory Richards?" The three of us look up as a tall orderly wanders over. "Your wife is asking for you," he announces, gesturing for Gregory to follow him. He lingers and turns to me, our eyes meeting briefly and I see the unspoken question dancing in his eyes. Reluctantly, I nod slightly and he exhales deeply before he turns away.

A sinking feeling settles in my stomach as he leaves, following the orderly to one of the exam rooms. For a brief moment, we were united again...and I felt like I could breathe for the first time in months. But now, watching him walk away is the cruelest reminder of just how much everything has changed. The baby in my arms whimpers, almost like he realizes how the dynamic has shifted between his grandfather and I.

The balance has tipped and it will never be righted again.

"Olivia?" Colin's voice cuts through my thoughts and I look up, a painful lump in my throat. "Why don't I take him from you?" he asks. "Give yourself a rest?" I nod blandly, watching as he reaches down and scoops Trey into his arms. A moment later, I can't help but smile. My grandson is carefully regarding Colin, his dark blue eyes steady. "Well now," I hear Colin say, "you certainly are much quieter than my little Helena, aren't you?"

A delighted expression takes over Trey's face and he grins, his toothless gums bared. An amused chuckle rises out of Colin's throat as he turns to me. "I think he and I are going to be grand friends."

His words balm my aching heart and my smile widens as he turns back to my grandson, their one-sided conversation resuming.

I yank the pale blue curtain aside, breathing heavily. "Finally!" Annie gasps. "Where have you been?"

Our eyes meet and several moment of silence go by until I know my tone will be even when I respond. "Checking on Trey."

"Checking on Olivia, you mean!"

"Don't," I warn, the unspoken threat impossible to miss. The doctor stitching her arm looks up, his eyes wide behind his safety glasses. "Be quiet and lie still."

She glares back at me, her eyes flashing as she spits out, "Don't you tell me that! You were checking on her!" Her angry voice carries over the noise from the surrounding patients and I can't help but glare back at her. "It was her you dragged to safety when the earthquake hit, not me! You didn't even give me a second thought!"

I lean down, my pulse spiking as I growl, "She was holding my grandson. What would you have liked me to do?"

She pushes me away, grunting heavily. "Taken Trey and then rescued me!" she hisses.

"Please," the doctor begs, holding my wife down, "don't move until I'm done."

"Listen to your doctor," I say coolly, backing away from the hospital bed. "I'll wait outside until he's finished." I turn away, gazing across the Emergency Room to where my ex-wife and grandson are sitting. Except now, Colin's holding Trey as Olivia looks up at them, smiling brightly.

"Stop!" I hear Annie exclaim and I glance over my shoulder as she pushes herself up. "Well, well," she marvels and my eyes narrow. She looks past me and I know she's followed my gaze. "Baron Colin makes another grand entrance." She chuckles to herself, tossing her red hair over her shoulder. As I glare at her, she smirks and asks nonchalantly, "If Olivia marries Colin, will that make her a baroness?"

If Olivia marries Colin.

If Olivia marries Colin.

Annie's question echoes in the sudden silence. Her eyes are triumphant as she slowly sits back and gestures for the doctor to continue. A black hole opens in my chest as I turn away and look back across to Olivia and Trey. My hand tingles, still feeling the way her cheek brushed against it. The closest we've been in months and that's suddenly all we'll ever have again.

With the blinding clarity of a supernova, I realize that she'll never smile at me again the way she is smiling at Colin right now. Months ago, I banished her from my heart. She then banished herself from my life.

And, now?

Now, we both nearly danced into death's arms.

Maybe it was when I held her to me as the house crumbled around us. Maybe it was when I saw her holding our grandson in his nursery. Maybe it was when she walked into the church for the baptism, an echo of the day she became my wife. Maybe it was when her eyes fluttered open in Naples after she nearly ended her life.

Whenever it changed, I really don't know. All I know is that we nearly died and she would've gone to her grave thinking I hated her.

But, I don't.

And, I realize sadly, maybe I never did.