Italics: flashbacks
Non italics: present day.
Before him, lay her soul, untarnished and pure, exposed due to his actions, a soul quivering with fear. He hissed in anger as she turned away, tears falling down her delicate cheeks. He reached up and grasped a hold of her chin turning it to face him.
He looked at that moment like a child, a sadistic one at that, the way he surveyed her. His dark eyes locked with hers and he seemed to flinch, as if her eyes held something that caused him pain.
Fear, was the emotion he found when he looked into her eyes, but underneath it, inside the fear was empathy.
She watched as his eyes shone green once more and he froze, mouth agape, heart pounding from deep within his chest. His bottom lip seemed to tremble, some kind of darkness remained within him, she could see it in his expression, yet it was dissipating now. It was at this moment that Hermione noticed that she was trembling, her entire being seemed to shake in terror.
"Please… stop." She whispered. The words seemed to break through to him as he leapt to his feet, back facing her and he quickly rearranged himself.
What happened to me? Why was I-what did I almost do? He mentally berated himself. Hermione. One day she has a madman touch her, the next another madman. He couldn't turn, he knew he should, he was a coward, a cad and most of all a monster.
She was still shaking, she had made no move to cover herself, she doubted she could move even if she tried. She wished he would turn, but wished he wouldn't at the same time.
"Forgive me." an almost inhuman sound emanated from his throat.
Did she forgive him? Did she believe he was sincere? The truth was that Hermione had absolutely no idea whatsoever.
He turned and his breath caught at the sight before him. She lay on a crumpled bed, her sex in plain sight, her legs covered in angry red fingermarks, her wrists already blackening in colour. He grabbed the sheet and slowly drew it over her body, feeling tears form in his eyes.
His hand brushed over her stomach as he pulled the sheet over her and she flinched grasping the bed cover and pulling it up to her chin, her knees following her hands, as she stared at him with wide, doe like eyes.
"Don't be afraid." He pleaded hands shaking. But I am afraid, I'm terrified. She thought as he took a step forward she flinched again, turning her face away.
He watched on in horror, something was wrong with him, something was taking over him, why was he that way, he did not know. Dumbledore. Harry thought and bowed his head, retreating from her side. "I am so sorry. Forgive me." she didn't answer and Harry closed his eyes tightly. "I understand." And with a flick of his hand the wards disappeared and he exited hands tightly bound together behind his back as he stormed from the infirmary.
He began running, he didn't know where he was going, what he was going to do, he merely knew he must run, create distance or he would be forced to truly grasp the consequences of his actions, as uncontrolled as they were. Something is inside me. I can't do this. Not to her.
He ran down the stairs that lead to the entrance hall and was caught of guard when a well placed expelliarmus hit him in the back, throwing him onto the stone floor. He let out a groan when his forehead hit the old stone, effectively breaking his glasses and bending his nose painfully.
"And where exactly do you think you are going Harry?" a stern voice came from behind him and Harry stood up quickly turning to see his old head of house regarding him sternly. Minerva face was creased with worry as she gazed upon him. "You mustn't be seen." She chastised and he flinched in shame. "Come boy." She ordered and he stood, following her, head bowed, chest rising and falling in exertion or emotion, he did not know.
The trip to the headmaster's office was surprisingly quick, it was as if his old Professor simply apparated them to the office of course that's not possible, Hermione has always told me to read Hogwarts, a history… Hermione.
The gargoyle after a few moments contemplation as it stared coldly at Harry, leapt to its feet and moved aside so that the unlikely duo could ascend the spiral staircase to the wise headmaster's office.
Dumbledore didn't look up, even when Harry was seated before him and Minerva had moved around the table to stand beside the old wizard. Harry watched as Minerva placed a hand on the headmaster's shoulder and looked up at her, affection riddling his features for a moment before he turned to Harry.
"Harry, is something the matter?" he asked quietly and Harry felt his heart thudding in his chest would give away the panic that had surged through him when he thought of what was the matter. He found that he was having trouble figuring out where to begin, all of his thoughts jumbled into one incoherent thought which was broken by- "start from when you left my office." Albus whispered patiently and Harry nodded quickly.
"We went back to the infirmary and talked to Dean and Susan. When we went back to Hermione's bed so that she could rest I- something happened." He gulped not knowing whether it was wise to utter any description of what happened. "Hermione said something- I think it was like a joke but something inside me just snapped, I felt so angry, so furious I knew that I had to punish her… I warded and silenced area, no one could see anything due to the hangings surrounding- something was… it was like I was being possessed, like my mind was there, but it told me things, I really wanted to hurt her and I- and I did." Minerva gasped and began briskly walking toward the doors.
"Minnie stop." The Professor turned and frowned heavily at Dumbledore, her lips pursed in an all too familiar disapproving expression. "What did you do to her?" Dumbledore spoke in a dangerous voice, it was as if Harry was a prisoner being questioned by his executioner.
"I forced her down- I didn't want to hurt her- I-I tore at her clothes, bruised- b-bruised her skin… but then I looked into her eyes and.. it was like looking into her soul, I had never seen something so.. vulnerable.. so pure… she asked me to stop and I came back, it was like a switch, the evil was gone, the anger gone… what if I hadn't looked into her eyes, hadn't heard her voice… I would have… I would have raped her." he choked his words out in horror and closed his eyes tightly. When he chanced a look at his old Headmaster he saw a shattered look on his face, but also it was as if Harry had confirmed something for him.
"You are not a bad person Harry. You have had terrible things happen to you in your life and this is a side effect of that."
"A side effect? How the hell will I stop it before I kill Hermione!" Harry exclaimed, exasperated and Dumbledore nodded to McGonagall whom exited and Harry watched as Amelia entered and stood beside Dumbledore in the space Minerva had just vacated.
***
Hermione watched his messy black hair disappear in an instant as he ran from the infirmary. She let more tears fall down her face as she trembled in fear, her heart beating at an alarming rate, her chest heaving as she choked out her cries of anguish.
When she felt what seemed like frail arms wrap around her shoulders she immediately sunk into the motherly arms, wanting and waiting for her pain to slip away into this saviour. A tender hand stroked her wild curls whispering soft reassurances.
"It's okay Hermione, just cry, and let it all out, it will be alright now, you are safe with me." Minerva, Hermione thought thankfully and felt her shaking subside in the familiar embrace.
It took several minutes, it must have been twenty minutes since Harry had fled, her tears had finally dried and she shifted slightly so that she could talk freely.
"I'm so confused, I shouldn't be so afraid, I mean, it's Harry its not like he's evil or something. But something inside of him it's just coming up… it's bubbling below the surface, just waiting to come up… that's what im scared of…" she growled under her breath and continued "some courage I'm showing-"
"-you are courageous, you staying by his side all these years. That is strength, you are his rock and without you he would have crumbled by now." Minerva said firmly and Hermione nodded in understanding. "Hermione, my dear girl, it is your choice whether to stay with Harry, go on this journey with him-"
"-I know Minnie…" she trailed off as her mentor stood. "but Minnie I would die for him, of course im not going to abandon him, I want to help him, solve this problem. Do you not believe me?" she implored and watched her old professor survey her with motherly affection.
"Yes I believe you." Hermione nodded and felt her eyes shutter close with sleep. "Yes my child, I know you will… and that's what I'm afraid of. You are too young to die."
Hermione walked up the steps to the old building, its walls were not as homely as Hermione remembered, over the years since she had last been here vines and grime had made there home amongst the outer stone walls. The hastily placed 'closed' sign hung loosely from a chain on the letter box, its red lettering glimmering like blood in the twinkling light of dusk.
She wiped some dirt off the metal plaque that was cemented into the wall near the now boarded up door.
'This stone was laid on the 31st of December 1968, a home to house those children orphaned by the dark. A home to offer light to all those shrouded in darkness. J.P.M'
Hermione stroked the initials fondly and felt more tears come to her eyes, grief was not something one should suffer on their own, yet Hermione had.
Hermione waved her wand and entered the now dank old building, which when she first journeyed here had been so warm and full of laughter. She looked to the staircase, all to familiar to Hogwarts grand staircase, which lead up to the bedrooms. She ascended the dirt ridden marble steps and turned left walking to the seventh room on the right. The cot had been replaced by a single four poster bed; its once vibrant green covers now a dull putrid shade in colour. She sat down and watched the dust rise in a small cloud as it moved to accommodate the little weight her body held. On the small bedside table was the round stain of a cup, obviously from where the owner of the room had misplaced their coaster.
She traced the old stain fondly, the red surface one again gleaming from her delicate fingers cutting through the layer of dust marring its face. Something flashed in the dull light journeying in from the boarded window. She looked under the bed, crouching, her bones protesting slightly as she reached for the small object.
She ran her thumb delicately over the golden surface of the locket; she opened the small casing to reveal two moving pictures. The golden chain hung loosely in her hands as she gazed longingly at the happy couple in the snow, an exact replica of the one on her bedside table, the second image was herself, holding a bundle of blankets, within, his head poking through was a baby boy. Her young, ripe self would look up towards the viewer, a content smile on her face, despite the circles just beginning to form under her eyes, her hair was in a bun on top of her head, several tendrils having escaped and were framing her face pleasantly. She watched as herself kissed the infants forehead and then smiled, over and over.
The clasp shut with a snap and Hermione closed her eyes tightly in pain. She closed her fist around the golden locket and exited the otherwise empty room, the sound of her footsteps muffled by the blanket of dirt and dust that lay at her feet.
Thanks for the reviews .. btw this isnt the end lol... this will be a story i am anticipating will be much longer than forgive these changes i mean both flashbacks and present day will link up if that makes sense
anyway, next chapter shouldnt be too far away..