chapter 6 HELP ME

He's lying. He has to be. He's just playing with my mind, trying to keep me under his control; it is just another move in his sick mind game.

That night Hermione didn't sleep well. Thousands of thoughts were traveling through her mind, keeping her from falling asleep. But Lucius didn't seem to be having the same problem. His calm and steady breathing told Hermione that he was sleeping peacefully. And that got her wondering how could he sleep so calmly after everything that he's done in his life? After all those horrible things, after all the lives he's taken only two nights ago? After all he's done to her?

She concluded that Death Eaters really don't have a conscience. Even she had a horrible feeling of guilt about the War and she fought at the right side.

There was also another reason why was she awake all night. She kept thinking about her future. Now that she knew Lucius's true motives for taking her, Hermione was even more frightened then she was when she had no idea about why had he chosen her as his award.

No matter how evil and cold Lucius was, Draco was his family. Now he's dead and it was completely understandable that Lucius wanted vengeance.

His wish is to take his anger out on someone and he's got me.

Then something crossed Hermione's mind. She pictured Lucius asleep in his bed, completely unaware of what's happening around him. If she did something to him, then she would be...free?

Quickly she pushed that thought away. It was a stupid thought. She would never be free, not in the world where Death Eaters rule, where Voldemort holds all the power and where she is blind. Who was she kidding by even thinking that she had a chance in hurting Lucius? If she had her eyesight things would be different. Her blindness was something that was constantly on Hermione's mind. Was it permanent? It was probably dark magic and she didn't know anything about that. But he does. If he wanted, Lucius could do something about it. He was a Death Eater, he was trained in dark magic. Hermione was positive he knew what spell it was used on her, but he simply didn't want to help her. Why would he? If he's smart he knows what would happen the moment Hermione would get her eyesight back. She would at least have a small possibility in defending herself from Lucius. But what would she achieve by escaping from him?

Hermione shuddered as she remembered Lucius's words about what would happen to her if she managed in escaping or hurting him in any way.

'If anything happens to me, I have arranged everything so you would fall into the arms of the cruelest Death Eaters.'

Just as she was about to close her eyes and try to get some sleep, she heard the rustling of the covers in the bed. Holding her breath, she hoped he's only moving and not waking up.

What is the time? I have to get some rest, he can't be waking up already!

Her hopes were shattered as Lucius got up from the bed. She quickly closed her eyes and pretended she was asleep. Maybe he would leave her alone that way.

Her heart was beating faster by each step that Lucius took. By the sound she could tell that he was walking towards her. And then there was a complete silence.

Hermione could feel his eyes on her, it felt like a burning feeling and all she wanted was that he would turn away from her leave her alone.

"I know that you're awake, girl. Even a blind person would see that," Lucius said mockingly.

Hermione's heart seemed to stop for a second but she recovered soon. Slowly she opened her eyes, even though it didn't make any difference. But she knew he would demand from her to open her eyes and she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of telling her what to do.

Hermione was starting to suspect she was developing some kind of sixth sense. Maybe it was all in her mind, she could feel when he was looking at her and it sent shivers down her body.

"Today is an important day. Wouldn't want to miss it, would we? Now do get up,"he ordered, annoyed.

And his voice. His voice seemed to rob her of her ability to breathe, made her want to hide.

Hermione quickly tried to do as she was asked, but she was surprised by the sharp pain in her back. It was so intense that she had to grab something for support and the bad was the closest thing.

"Remove your hands from my bed. I do not wish your dirt on my sheets. It is bad enough I have to put up with you in my bedroom."

"I didn't ask to be here," Hermione shot back, but she quickly regretted it. She really didn't want to be thrown into a wall this early in the morning.

Not even a second later she felt a slap across her face, although he has not touched her. He has used magic to hit her and that meant that he was only annoyed and not actually angry at her. She has realized that he only used his hands to hurt her if she really angered him. He had slapped her a few times in the last two days, but only in rage. He wouldn't dirty himself by touching her. Magic was much easier and cleaner way to torture someone. And if Hermione had to choose, she would rather be tortured with magic. It was less personal. The feeling of his skin on her made everything much more difficult.

"If I were you, I would be careful with my words. This day will be a test for you. If you behave, then you will be rewarded with food," Lucius explained calmly, but his voice was dripping with authority.

Without another word he walked into the bathroom. Hermione stood frozen, not knowing what to do. He has not given her orders on what she should be doing. She almost laughed hysterically at that thought. Is that how her life is going to be like from now on? Waiting for Lucius's orders? Giving him the power to control her life? And what test was he talking about?

God, she wanted to disobey him, to anger him, but she was so tired. And hungry.

After few minutes Lucius came out of the bathroom and Hermione heard a rustling sound coming from him. She concluded he was probably putting his robes on and made her feel uncomfortable. Fighting the urge, to turn away from him, she realized that she was acting childish. She couldn't see him, why should she turn away from him?

Still, the last thing she wanted or needed was to be in the room with Lucius Malfoy while he's putting his clothes on.

"I am going down for a delicious breakfast. You understand why I can't take you with me,"he said politely and with those words he walked to the doors.

Hermione's stomach rumbled painfully, but she showed nothing on her face.

"I will come for you in the evening. My friends don't want to miss the main entertainment," Lucius informed her,"You are allowed to use the bathroom. You have until the evening to make yourself presentable."

He left no room for agruing. It was evident that he was used to people obeying him without complaints. But Hermione was used to speak her mind and she had to literally bite her tongue to stop herself from making a remark.

Without giving her a chance to reply, he walked out of the room, closing and locking the doors behind him. Hermione stood there, unable to breath. The fear of what he'll do to her was almost choking her.

He's going to hurt me, they are going to hurt me and there's nothing I can do against it. No, I won't make it easy for them. If he expects me to wash myself and make myself presentable, he will get a big surprise when he returns.

Time was passing unbelievably slowly. It's strange how everything seems to move slower when you're waiting for something. And if you are without a clock and in a dark, it's much harder.

The fact that she was alone in the room was driving Hermione crazy. Not that she would rather be with Lucius, but the horrible silence was making her even more nervous than she was. At least he gave her a permission to use the bathroom. After a few minutes of trying to get to the bathroom without tripping over something, Hermione was finally able to drink some water. At least she wouldn't die of dehydration. After her thirst was taken care of, Hermione stumbled back into the bedroom and leaned against the wall. She was trying to distract herself by thinking about spells and potions. That way she had a feeling of control and it made her feel a bit better. She brought back the memories of her time at Hogwarts, where her opinion counted. Where no one ordered her to keep her mouth shut. Well, no one except Professor Snape.

But those memories didn't last for long. Her anxiety took over.

Hermione was having an inner battle. Her mind felt like it would explode. Too many thoughts, too many emotions...

Than she heard him. It had to be him. The sound of his boots clicking on the hard ground was settled deep in her mind. She quickly got up from the floor before he walked in the room, not wanting to give him a chance to order her to do so.

Putting on a strong face, she waited. And she didn't have to wait long.

"My, my... The evening has came a lot faster than I expected. Are you excited, Mudblood?" he asked, anticipation in his tone.

"Excited about what?" Hermione asked, hoping she would get out of this situation if she acted ignorant.

She could actually hear him smirk:"Do not make a mistake by thinking you are smarter than me. I can see right through you. You know well enough what I mean."

Hermione stayed silent, biting the inside of her cheek nervously.

Lucius continued:"I see you haven't done anything to make yourself more presentable," then he added more quietly,"As if that's even possible."

He suddenly flicked his wand and Hermione felt the nightgown on her body change into something. Into a robe made of wool. It covered most of her body and she was grateful for that, but she was sick of the clothes he picked for her.

"Where are my clothes? Why can't I wear them?"

She didn't know why she was asking. Those clothes she was wearing were filthy, covered in mud and blood. And besides clothes were the least of her problems.

"You should know by now that muggle clothing is not welcome here," he showed disgust in his voice,"You will wear something more appropriate for you from now on. Come here."

"Why?" Hermione asked, not moving from the spot she was standing on.

"Because we are expected downstairs. Have you forgotten already? Don't tell me you memory is as short as your intelligence."

Anger started to rise in Hermione, but she was wise enough to not show it. Fear was stronger and it was clearly written on her face.

"No. I-I'm not going," she said quickly.

"Yes you are. Do not waste my time. Come here," Lucius ordered again and this time his voice was stronger and harder.

"No!" Hermione shot back, panic taking over her.

"I do not have time for this!" Lucius hissed angrily.

No, no, no, no... He can't make me go. I won't go... I won't...

"Imperio!"

Hermione stood frozen. She could not move. Her thoughts were still there in her mind. She knew exactly what she wanted to do, but she simply could not even move. She tried to open her mouth to scream at him, but she could not even move her tongue.

"Now come here," she heard him say and she than her body moved as she obeyed, making her way towards his voice.

It was impossible not to.

Hermione's body wasn't hers anymore. Some other person took over it, Hermione was just stuck inside of it, fighting hopelessly for some kind of control. She had always thought she had a strong mind will, but now it was put to the test. A test she was failing miserably.

"Walk with me."

And she obeyed again, not caring where he was taking her, not caring what would happen if she followed him. His hand was on her arm, guiding her and she didn't mind it at all.

They walked slowly down the hall, the oak trees creating long shadows on the bare walls.

Hermione followed Lucius without questions, until they stopped and she heard a large door swung open. Then she was pushed inside and suddenly all the warmth seeped away from her, reality crushing her once more. She could hear them. Around her. Their laugh, their conversation... By the noise they were making there had to be at least four or five men, Hermione concluded.

Oh god, oh god...

She tried to stay calm, taking deep breaths, but finding herself unable to calm down.

"Here she is, my friends. Just as I promised," Lucius said from behind her.

"I hope she is worth all the wait, Lucius. We've been working all day long!" some man said, his voice was harsher than Lucius'.

"Indeed," Lucius replied.

Antonin? Antonin Dolohov?

Now shear panic threatened to take over Hermione.

"And now it's time for pleasure, right?" another man said. Hermione couldn't recognize his voice, but he sounded older. Much older that Lucius and Dolohov.

"Please, be my guest," Lucius said in his most silky voice, he then moved away from Hermione.

Where did he go? What do they want from me?

"She's Potter's little mudblood friend," one of the men recognized her.

"And we will enjoy it more because if that..."Dolohov muttered quietly.

"You…you stay away from me," Hermione cautioned, holding out a hand, warding them off. But her hand was shaking and it probably didn't look very convincing.

"Or what?" Antonin asked, daring her.

Hermione opened her mouth, then shut them again, realizing she has nothing to threaten them with. What could she say? All of the sudden she felt someone's hand on her face, brushing it slightly. She quite literally felt her stomach turn. She stepped backwards, but he chuckled softly, enjoying the sport. Hermione walked backwards, hoping the find the comfort of a wall, but she bumped into someone.

"Lucius, why is she wearing that robe? This occasion demands something more...open, don't you agree?" Dolohov asked and Hermione's trembling became even worse.

"If you don't mind me saying, I think she's showing more than enough skin for my liking."

That was his voice. That calm, silky voice. It was coming from another end of the room as Hermione could tell. But why? Why wasn't he participating? Maybe he enjoyed watching.

"Let's see if she's wearing any knickers?" the older man said.

Hermione's eyes widened and panic swept through her. She could hear two men closing the distance between themselves and her and before she had a chance to turn and run they had her by the arms. She struggled, grunting in her effort to get away from them.

There were no tears on her face, she was in too much shock for that.

Dolohov laughed evilly:"She's quite strong for a girl!" then he added, "But we're stronger."

Hermione gritted her teeth in rage, then kicked out as hard as she could, making contact with something on Dolohov's body, sending him to the floor.

She was not sure what she had hit, but it must have hurt, because he yelped in pain and let go of her.

It was enough of a disturbance to get them to release her and she made a step to run away. A hand clamped around her ankle and she fell, her chin crashing into the hard floor, the taste of blood bitter in her mouth as stars exploded behind her eyes. She screamed in a feeble attempt at calling for help, but she realized she doesn't have anyone to call for help. She didn't stop struggling and the laughter of the men echoing louder than ever.

She could feel her body being pulled across the marble floor, letting out a loud scream as she was drug backwards by her ankles.

No, no, no... NO!

Adrenaline exploded in Hermione's veins and she couldn't stop herself from kicking and biting whatever was in her reach. Some force took over her, the primeval instinct to survive.

She was turned over roughly and reaching out she scratched a man that was holding her down across his face, skin gathering under her nails. He slapped her hard, splitting her lip wide open, cheers echoing off the high walls as he gathered both her wrists in one of his own large hands.

Where is he? Is he even in the room? Hermione wondered, as she felt her knees being forced apart.

"Oh, I am going to enjoy this," she heard a man on top of her say.

When she felt his hot breath on her face, Hermione gathered all her courage and spat in his face.

"You little bitch!" Dolohov roared, his tone filled with rage.

"Now now, Antonin, don't take it personally," Lucius said from across the room.

Hermione could hear the other men laugh, but the man on top of her just became more enraged. She struggled against him violently, trying to kick at him, at any of them, but it was useless. They had her pinned completely against the floor. So she did the only thing she could.

She screamed at the top of her lungs:"You bastards! You bloody bastards!"

Rodolphus was tugging at the material of her robe, fingers sliding against the skin of her thighs as they were exposed.

..stop stop stop! Please stop!

She would beg if she were able to speak. Her body was now racked by violent sobs.

"You coward,"she only whispered and this time she meant only one person. The one who was standing across the room, away from all the violence, the person who allowed all this happening. Lucius Malfoy. And she knew he could hear her, somehow she just knew.

"Stop," Lucius said.

That single word stopped everything that was happening. Their hands on her body stopped moving and there was a complete silence, until she could hear the sound of his boots again. He was walking towards them.

Why? What will he do? Does he...does he want to...participate?

"What was that, Mudblood?" he asked from above her.

Hermione didn't even try to stop herself:"You coward. You bastard. You evil, sick, twisted bastard. You're pathetic. All of you."

She was about to be violated, hurt in the most horrible way, why would she be afraid of him? There was nothing worse he- they could do to her.

"I am going to ignore your insults and blame them on the horrible situation you're in. People in danger tend to say things they actually don't mean," Lucius quietly said, not showing emotions,"I will give you a choice."

What choice?

"I can make it all stop. You just ask. Or better said- beg and I will see what I can do about it."

Hermione shook her head. He's playing with my mind! He's just trying to see how much further can he humiliate and destroy me.

"It all depends on you, Mudblood." he said, amused.

"Shut up. Just stop talking!" Hermione screamed with rage. She could not listen to him anymore, he was just making everything worse.

"I would say that she needs a few more lessons in respect, Lucius," Dolohov said, "It appears that she still has a lot of learning to do. How can you stand her insults? If you ask me-"

"Do shut up, Antonin," Lucius replied coldly, then turned his attention towards Hermione again, "You do realize that we can carry on like this, but I wouldn't advise you to take us down that route. I don't believe you'll be able to take it. Why do you always insist on making things harder for yourself?"

Silence.

"Well, Miss Granger? I have given you a choice. Now decide."

Hermione couldn't believe what was happening. Why was he doing this to her? Was he trying to make her completely insane? She felt like she was standing on a cliff and he pushed her down, but now he was holding his hand out to her, offering help. What is wrong with him?

"Please," she started. She had to try, at least. She wouldn't be able to live with herself, knowing that she didn't do absolutely everything to stop what was happening.

"Please what?" Lucius asked, he was clearly enjoying this.

"Please, stop them," the words were barely coming out through her gritted teeth," Help me...Don't let them hurt me," Hermione's voice was so small and quiet that she could hardly hear herself.

Lucius asked innocently:"And why would I do that? Convince me."

"Because...it's wrong. It's barbaric and inhuman. It's sick!" Hermione tried, not even knowing what she was saying.

"Not so convincing. Antonin, do continue with what you were-" Lucius replied.

"Please! Don't do this! I-I've never done.. this before! I can't...Please, I'll do anything. You can do anything to me, anything but this..." Hermione babbled, tears running down her cheeks, almost choking her. She was asking him for help and he was the one responsible for all that was happening to her. It didn't make sense.

There was a compete silence, except for her sobs.

"I think that will be enough, gentlemen," Lucius said coldly.

"Oh, but we've just started with-" Dolohov began, but Lucius cut him short.

His voice was authoritative:"No, Antonin. You heard me. Do try to show some dignity if it's not too much to ask."

Hermione couldn't believe what she was hearing. He dares to talk about dignity? After what they almost did...he reminds them to show some dignity?

But she couldn't lose her time with thinking about that. She felt like something heavy was lifted of her shoulders and she could breath again. She was shaking so hard she thought she would bite her tongue by accident.

She felt all the hands leave her body and the weight of the man that was holding her down, was lifted off of her.

"It was an interesting evening," Lucius said to them politely.

"It sure was," one of the men said.

They exchanged a few polite words, then Hermione heard them walking out of the room.

She was alone with him once again. Not fighting, she just gritted her teeth in pain as she was pulled up from the floor. And without another word they were walking again. Hermione felt numb. She didn't know what to say, what to feel. And he too was quiet.

A minute later they were in the bedroom again. Lucius released her arm and she stumbled a few steps away from him, hugging herself with her arms.

"I think some gratitude would be appropriate," he then said to her, sarcasm in his voice.

"W-What?"

"You haven't thanked me yet."

Rage was slowly building inside of her again. Lucius slowly walked over to her and stopped before her shaking body.

"I saved you. I knew Muggles were ungrateful and don't deserve anything, but I demand you show some respect towards me, Mudblood," Lucius hissed.

Hermione pulled the answer out of the depths of her rage and her pain:"You really are sick."

He laughed cruelly:"But I have you under my control. You are at my mercy. You couldn't even imagine how I enjoyed seeing you scared, terrified like a small little girl..."

He was leaning towards her, Hermione could feel his face close to hers. Before she could realize what she was doing, she whiped her hand out and she slapped him hard across the face. The same hand covered her mouth in shock the second after.

She had to make him stop talking, she just couldn't stand listening to him anymore. And she suceeded. There was a horrible silence. Hermione couldn't even hear him breathing.

Oh god, oh god, oh god, what have I done?

Here's another chapter! I hope you like it. If you do, please tell me. Review! :)