Reason Five, Six, Seven, and Eight: Mercedes, Artie, Tina, and Kurt
Well then let us move on shall we?
Her voice filled the room. There was no pause this time, no time to agonize.
We were all the people that never got a chance. We were all marked as different due to things out of our control. Mercedes, Artie, Tina, and Kurt. All different yet all the same.
Mercedes.
Artie.
Tina.
Kurt.
Mercedes, both of us have similar personalities but I guess that is not enough for friendship. When you tried to go after Kurt both Tina and I tried to stop you. I did it because I thought we were friends. Yet you never extended the same courtesy to me. Never did you try to stop me from foolishly pursuing a path that led to hurt. It might not have been your responsibility but you could have helped.
Artie.
Tina.
Kurt.
I always thought you had a nice character, Artie. You are an old soul that is always willing to give a helping hand. Except to me. You did help me in stuff but not in things that truly mattered. You never offered to sit with me. You never offered to just sit and listen. But you did give me help in other things. I guess in a way you treated me like an acquaintance. To me it just was never enough.
Tina.
Kurt.
Tina, you have a nice voice. You also have a strange sense of style. I'm probably not one that should judge if we go by the comments my choice of wardrobe receives. I thought we could bond over that. We both have different styles to that of the student body. We both stand out. We both dress out. But we never really talked. You talked to others but never to me. Guess similar fashion sense is not a good enough topic.
Kurt.
You and I, Kurt, are the same. If I'm the cheap copy of Jesse then you and I are of the same mold. It was not until recently that we have become friends. But it was before our friendship that your comments hurt me. You pretended to be my friend only to help make a mockery of me. Divas. Skilled. Different. The same but too alike. We were competition and in a way that gave me a bond.
I guess it was not you personally that hurt, other than your comments on my character, but rather what others did to you. You were picked on but people still liked you. They stood up for you. Even Quinn likes you.
Mercedes, Artie, Tina, and Kurt.
Along with me we were the original New Directions. We were all freaks. We were all in the outskirts. We were the same. I thought we would band together and become friends. Isn't that what happens in movies? The freaks get together, find out they are something, and tumble down the existing regime. The female protagonist even manages to snag a cute boyfriend.
But that didn't happen. Instead you four became friends and I was left along. Always watching and never participating. Always standing behind and never besides. Always on the outside and looking in.
Maybe that is what hurts.
Not that you excluded me but that I always had to watch. It would be one thing to be a freak but another to see other people labeled as such yet that had so much more. You all had friendship. Even though we were outcasts you had all found a people that accepted you. You found people that enjoyed you. You had a place of strength.
I don't hate you guys nor do I blame you but your actions did hurt. Intentional or unintentional they still had the same effect. They still had the same burn.
And so concludes part one of my misery. The first part that loosened the glue. But not the part that shattered my heart. That part happened next.
Her first year in New Direction concluded. The tape went dead and the machine popped open. Wordlessly I switched sides.
"Puck," Mr. Shue said quietly, "We don't have to continue with the tape today."
I couldn't bear not knowing, only guessing, what my role was. I turned back to my spot taking in the faces of the club members. And for once I saw the one thing that has been eating me all along. I saw shame.
A/N- So I finished part one. I wanted to keep the identity of Puck a secret until after the first part and hopefully you enjoyed the small introduction of his name.
Thank you Shelz for your last review.