The next week seemed to slow down as Kim tried desperately to keep herself busy. She spent most of her days treating patients and her nights checking in on the clinic but Kerry was never far from her thoughts.

She had left last Sunday, well enough to return back to her life and son in Chicago. As much as Kim had wanted her to stay she knew she couldn't keep hold of Kerry; she wasn't the only one that needed her. She reached into her back pocket and pulled out a folded photo, staring at the smiling faces intently.

"I have enough of these at home," Kerry chuckled, trying to break the tension. "I'd like you to keep a hold of it… if you want to of course." She added quickly, misreading the look in Kim's eyes. She handed over the photo that she had kept safe under her pillow, brushing Kim's hand as she reached out to take it.

"Oh wow…" Kim mumbled, not trusting her emotions if she spoke any louder. "Thank you Kerry, this means… a lot." Gently running her fingers over the smiling faces of Kerry and Henry, she smiled at the redhead, tears brimming in her eyes.

She felt a small tear run down her cheek which she quickly brushed away, pocketing the photo once more and exhaling loudly, imagining what it would be like to be at Kerry's and meet Henry. She heard someone clearing their throat behind her and she turned to find Gillian watching. "Oh, I didn't see you there," Kim said with a small smile, her hand moving protectively over the pocket with the photo.

"Sorry I didn't mean to intrude. He's beautiful isn't he?" Gillian nodded towards where the photo sat, a grin on her face.

"Very," Kim turned to face the woman, "Did Kerry tell you much about his mother?"

"Not much really. We all have our reasons for coming out here, sure we all want to make a difference but most of the time, it's an escape. Kerry was never one to talk about her feelings, at least up until you arrived." Gillian smiled at the blonde whose cheeks began to turn a light shade of red. "You shouldn't be embarrassed, she cares about you a great deal. She's changed."

"Part of me is so happy to see that she finally moved on after us, accepting herself, but it hurts to know that I wasn't a part of that. She had a wife, a son and now… I don't know. I don't think I'll ever compare to what she's had." Leaning her head back against the wall, Kim pulled a small bottle of water out of her cargo trousers and took a long sip, trying to push her insecurities to the side.

Gillian stood in silence, not sure what to say, instead she settled on distraction. "I have another job for you, perhaps take your mind off of everything."

"That," Kim finished her drink, turning to face the woman, "Would be great. Thanks."

"Don't thank me yet, you don't know what it is."

…..

The sun preyed on them overhead, beginning to burn Kim's fair skin. Settling herself back onto the stool beneath the shade, she picked up another needle, uncapping it. The long line of people in front of her never seemed to dwindle and the day seemed to be dragging on. "Who's next?" She asked with a broad smile. The prospect of being stuck with a needle was foreign out here and Gillian thought her psychological expertise would be best used calming the people of Matenda enough to get them immunised.

A young girl stepped forward, ushered by her father. Kim could see the small tracks down her cheeks where tears had cut through the dirt and she reached out to the child, who sat on Kim's knee weakly, her eyes never leaving the needle in the blonde's hand. "I know honey, this might seem scary," She knew the child could not understand her, but she hoped the soothing tones in her voice would make the difference. "But I promise I won't hurt you."

As she spoke, Kim inserted the needle gently into the child's arm, watching the girl's face for a reaction. Pulling the needle out slowly, the girl turned to look at Kim, a small smile raising her cheeks. "See, not so bad." Kim gave the child a quick grin before the father took her, nodding his thanks to the doctor.

Kim looked over at Gillian who sat on a stool nearby, her own line of people eagerly awaiting their shots. "You're good with children." Gillian called across as she dealt with a wriggling child on her lap. "I think I scare them."

Laughing to herself, Kim beckoned the next child forward, dropping her needle into a bucket at her feet and uncapping the next one. The child sat without complaint on Kim's lap, swinging their legs playfully. Thinking back to the photo still in her pocket, she imagined if Henry would be like this; carefree and happy. It was amazing what children could overcome and in her line of work she had seen her share of them. From broken households, domestic violence and to the children she had seen in the Congo battling disease, death and loss, she wondered how it was that they were so resilient to life's pain.

"I thought this was supposed to take my mind off of things?" Kim called over to Gillian who smiled at the blonde's hidden accusation.

"The children needed vaccinating," Gillian answered sweetly, winking at Kim. "And to be fair, I did say 'perhaps'." Gillian was right; the children needed vaccinating but she also knew Kim needed to be reminded that she could fall into the family unit she longed for.

"Ah, I see, technicality huh." She injected the happy child in front of her, smiling again as the child hopped off of her lap and skipped off towards a group of playing toddlers. "I get the point."

"I'm glad you do, you've been missing it these past few days." Gillian finished with her wriggling child, throwing the needle to the ground beneath her and taking a long sip of water, ignoring Kim's gaze.

"I've lost her once Gillian, this time she has a child. I don't know if I can handle all of this." Kim looked down at her feet, kicking softly at the dirt as the children in front of her fought over who would go next.

"You love her right?" Gillian asked simply, grabbing Kim's attention back.

"More than anything."

"Then you can handle all of this." Gillian turned back to the queue in front of her, brandishing another needle.

Kim rubbed her eyes gently, losing herself in her thoughts for a moment. She knew Gillian was right. There was a reason why she and Kerry had both headed out here and they had both come so far. So she had a child, a life without her… could she match up to that? But if it was a case of all or nothing with Kerry; Then she'd pick all. Every time.

A Few Days Later

"Come to Chicago, stay with us for a while. Meet Henry." Kerry held Kim's hands in front of her as they stood outside the clinic, Kerry saying her final goodbyes before she left. Her eyes were pleading with Kim's that had begun to tear up.

"I don't know Kerry, you've got this life now and… it would be intrusive."

"Not if you were invited," Kerry tried to lighten the situation, rubbing the blonde's hands in her own. "Please Kim, I need to see you, I can't do this again."

Kim stood in the crowded airport, her backpack slung high on her shoulder and her eyes scanning the departures board methodically, watching for her flight. It flashed up quickly and she began to move forward, stopping only when she saw the photo drop out of her front pocket and onto the floor ahead of her. Kneeling down, she picked it up, gazing at the two faces that seemed to welcome her to them. She smiled back at them and pocketed the picture once more, this time in her back pack. As she did so she pulled out her flight ticket, tracing her fingers over the words San Francisco and sighing heavily. In that split second she felt torn by the people that she wanted and the life she had tried hard to make for herself. But the second passed and she moved with the crowd around her, tearing up the ticket in her hands and dumping it in the nearest trash can.