Sam knocked on the front door of his brother's house before he let himself in.

"Hey! Anyone home?"

Castiel's head poked out from around the kitchen doorway. "Sam."

"You know, hello works just as well as a greeting." He laughed slightly. He put his bag down and went over to him, pulling him into a hug. "Where is he?"

Cas hugged him back. "Barn."

Sam nodded and let him go. "How are you then, Cas?"

"I'm doing good." Cas smiled. "I'm happy."

Sam grinned and patted his shoulder. "Good."

"How's school?"

Sam pushed down the panic about his exam in a week's time that he knew he had to be back for. "Great, yeah... harder than I remember. I guess I got out for practice."

They chitchatted for a while until Sam cleared his throat slightly. "Guess I'd better go let him know I'm here."

Cas nodded and Sam headed over to the barn. The closer he got, the louder Black Sabbath became. Sam smirked and shook his head as he walked in.

Inside the barn was like mechanics heaven. There was the shell of a car that had definitely seen better days on bricks. The car looked like a computer stripped back to its motherboard with various wires and complicated looking parts poking out and running deep into the heart of the machine. It was perfect for learning about its inner workings.

"Seriously got to update the music, Dean." He spoke out as he looked around the barn for his brother. "It's the 21st century, join us."

"Glad to see it's not only me." A voice spoke from behind him and he spun. A teenage girl smiled up at him. Her auburn hair was pulled back into a pony tail, she wore a dark blue jumpsuit over what looked like jeans and an Avenged Sevenfold t-shirt. She itched her cheek, leaving black oil from her fingers on her face. "You must be Sammy."

"Sam." He corrected automatically. "What's your name?"

"I'm Maria. Dean's teaching me how to fix a muffler back on."

"It's easy really. She's just slow." Sam frowned, hearing his brother's voice but not seeing him. "Down here, Sammy."

He looked down and saw Dean's feet sticking out from under the car. He opened his mouth to speak but Dean beat him to it.

"No, I have not been terrorising munchkins, don't even think about it, Dorothy."

He pushed himself out and stood up, wiping his hands. He nodded to Maria. "Take a look, see what I did."

She nodded and crawled under the car. Dean looked at Sam and grinned.

"Hey little brother."

"Hey Dean."

They hugged, Dean slapped his back like he always did. "How's it going?"

"Not bad, what about you?" Sam tried to keep his tone casual.

"Oh, I get it!" Maria called out from under the car.

Dean smiled slightly. "See? Easy right?"

"So easy!" She pushed herself back out, standing up. "Thanks, Dean."

"No problem. Go wash up, there's a sandwich waiting for you back at the house."

Maria took off her jumpsuit and hung it up, heading out the barn.

"So, Mr Winchester... Saturday school?" Sam folded his arms, feeling a little proud of his brother. He'd done a lot of growing lately.

"She doesn't get on with the other kids so I'm teaching her on her own for a bit." He went to the sink on the side of the wall and washed the oil and grease off his hands and face before taking off the jumpsuit and hanging it up beside Maria's. "It's good to see you, Sam. How long you planning on staying with us?"

Sam smirked slightly. "Not that good obviously."

"I didn't mean it like... shut your pie-hole." Dean shook his head as they headed back towards the house.

Castiel and Maria were sitting on the porch making awkward eye contact and eating sandwiches in sync. Dean paused for a moment and watched them in confusion. "I worry about him sometimes."

"That seems to be a running theme with you two..." Sam muttered.

"Huh?" Dean looked up at him, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't get mad, but Cas called me... the nightmares, Dean? When where you going to tell me?" Sam folded his arms.

"When it became important... they're just dreams." He waved it off, refusing to believe there was anything else at play here other than his guilty conscience.

"Like my dreams about Jess and everything else were just dreams?"

"Give me a break, Sam!" Dean sighed.

"There was demon blood in you, Dean. That does stuff to you." Sam frowned in concern. "Now what where these dreams about?"

"Just stuff, look I don't want to talk about them. When I start seeing house fires and then they're on the news I'll let you play Doctor Phil, okay?" He squared his jaw, clearly getting angry.

"Fine, fine." He held his hands up in surrender. "And I was thinking I'd stay for a few days... I've got to be back at school on Friday."

"Deja vu, anyone?"

"I just... I just want you to be okay so Cas and you can have a life, you know?"

Dean smiled slightly and stood on his tiptoes, wrapping an arm around his brothers shoulders and pulling him down to his level. He ruffled his hair. "I know, Sammy."

"Please stop."

Dean got Sam set up in the spare room and was getting ready for his own bed when he felt warm hands run over his chest and a body press against his own from behind. His heart stopped and a lump of nerves rose in his throat. He was suddenly very aware of how little he was wearing as he stood there in his slacks. Castiel's breath was hot against the back of his neck and set shivers down his spine.

"Cas... I..."

He shushed him quietly as he left small and gentle kisses across his bare shoulders. Dean swallowed the lump in his throat which just shot back up again regardless. He turned around slowly, standing face to face with him. His head bowed slightly and he leant his forehead against Cas'. They stayed like that for sometime, Dean trying to rake up the courage to close the gap between them and kiss him until his lips hurt. Cas tilted his head back slightly. Dean could feel his breath on his lips, suddenly the same lips were gently brushing against Castiel's before withdrawing. Cas let out a little sigh of contentment and did the same back to him. Dean suddenly took hold of the back of his neck and pulled him tightly against himself as he kissed him deeply. The kiss was strong and wet and filled with so much desire neither thought they could handle it. Dean didn't know how it happened, but suddenly they were on the bed and Cas had his legs wrapped around his hips; their hand on each others chests, backs and thighs. Hot hands on hot skin. Castiel's hand slipped under the front of the waist band of Dean's slacks and his eyes shot wide open. He broke the kiss, looking down at him panicked. Castiel frowned in concern, taking his hand back.

"Dean? Dean what is it?"

Dean swallowed, his eyes stung and the lump in his throat was replaced by a tightness. "I... I..."

"Dean... you're crying..." Castiel sat up slightly and reached out to touch his face.

Dean flinched away. He didn't want to but he couldn't seem to stop himself. He backed off the bed, stumbled and crashed into the dresser.

"Dean!" Castiel reached out to him, as if trying to comfort him from a distance. "Talk to me, what's going on?"

"I... I can't do this... I... sorry!" He grabbed his t-shirt and headed out and went down the stairs.

Castiel watched him go, wondering what he'd done wrong.

Dean sat on the porch. His head was in his hands and hot tears chilled on his cheeks in the cold night air. A thought had popped into his head while he and Cas had been... getting closer; a memory really. He'd been fourteen and on a hunt with his Dad. They'd driven past a gay couple who were holding hands, John had looked at them in the rear view mirror and made a disgusted noise.

"Really? It's bad enough in private." He'd muttered.

Dean had frowned and looked back as well. He didn't see why though. The two of them seemed happy. "How come, Dad?"

"Dean, being gay is worse than being a demon. Two men together... it's just wrong. It goes against nature, and you know what we do with things like that." John looked at him and smirked as he tried to make a joke out of it.

Dean hadn't laughed and John kept looking at him until he forced a smile. John smiled back at him.

"That's my boy."

Dean shivered but he wasn't sure it was because of the night chill or his fathers words.

When he'd turned sixteen he made a friend at one of his temporary schools. His name was Ian. He closed his eyes and remembered the time he and Ian had snuck out to a movie when he was supposed to be looking after Sam. They'd sat on the back row. Half way through the movie he felt Ian's hand slip into his own and give it a small squeeze. It had felt nice, but as soon as Dean realised he liked it bile and fear rose in his throat and he'd turned on Ian. He'd punched him again and again until the cinema staff had dragged him out and called John. The police had explained what had happened. John bought Dean the first ice cream he'd had in months that night.

The porch boards creaked behind him and he looked over his shoulder. Sam was standing close to him. He gave him a small smile and sat down next to him.

"You okay, Dean?" He asked sleepily.

"Yeah... yeah I'm fine..." He turned his head away and wiped his eyes quickly.

"Look, I get it. This is hard on you, it's hard on Cas and believe it or not, seeing you like this isn't exactly easy on me." Sam ran his fingers through his hair and then leant forward slightly, looking at his brother. "Cas loves you. I love you. That's all that matters. Family, remember?"

Dean sniffed and then cleared his throat, nodding. "Yeah, yeah I know."

"Alright. So what's going on with you?"

"I just... remembered something Dad said and... well..." He trailed off.

Sam didn't have to imagine what his homophobic and vague redneck father had told Dean when he was a kid. He gritted his teeth slightly. "Dad was an asshole."

"Sammy!"

"Being dead doesn't mean we have to forgive him for what he did, Dean." Sam looked at him seriously. "He left us alone for days on end with barely enough money to get by. I saw you starving for me just so I had enough food to eat. He raised you to always put everyone else before yourself. That's why you went to hell for me, that's why you told Cas to leave instead of looking out for him and that's why you accepted the mark from Cain. You don't understand how much you matter to the people around you, Dean. And it breaks my heart."

Dean looked at him, his lips parting slightly in shock.

"But what breaks it more is that you are still Dad's solider." Sam sighed. "And that you still give a shit about what a dead man thinks of you."

Dean closed his mouth, he was speechless. Not because Sam would say something like that, but because he finally realised it was true. He smiled slightly and hugged Sam tightly. Sam hugged him back instantly.

"You're going to be okay, Dean."

"I love you, Sammy." He smirked, letting him go.

"Love you too, you big gay bear." Sam grinned, watching his brother head back inside.

Dean paused on the doorstep. "Actually I'm bisexual, FYI." He grinned and winked before heading back upstairs.