Please don't kill me. I'm just taking a leaf from the show's book. Would it be anything other than THEM if they didn't ponder over it for ages? XD

To reward you for sticking with my long stretches of stagnant thought, I will post TWO chapters tonight... AND... the end of chapter 6 is where I will REALLY start to deviate.

Chew on that for a while. It will tide you over if you really think about it. That, and I'm gonna kick it up to M at some point, I hope. ;)

'til then, enjoy these two chaps!

My God, amazing how we got this far

It's like we're chasing all those stars

Who's driving shiny big black cars

No matter how hard she tried to shake him, Kate could not get rid of Castle. The startling realization was less about that, and more about why she couldn't make him go away. She kept casting him off, only to reel him back in. Every time he messed up, she gave him another chance. Kate Beckett wasn't one to give people second chances, but with Castle, she always did, and that's why he didn't ever disappear completely. She didn't want him to. It was that simple, and that difficult.

Kate sighed and got up to get yet another cup of coffee. It was a rainy night at the station, and everyone else had gone home. This was a familiar setting for Beckett, but there was an emptiness that she couldn't break, and instead of studying her murder board meticulously, she was lost in her thoughts.

Ever since he came back from the Hamptons, she had been feeling closer and closer to him, despite the fact that this summer, she had decided that she was going to cut ties with him completely. After all, it was he who left her.

Right?

She knew it was partially her fault, and that Esposito had been right when he told her that Rick didn't want to watch her with another guy, and that was why he was leaving. But at that point, she couldn't let herself trust him, and she wasn't sure why. So she went with Demming, simply a deflect to her true feelings. And when Esposito had told her, she broke it off with Demming, determined to make her feelings known, but it had been too late.

But as usual, he came back, and she had let him in. How could she not?

It was amazing, really. They had been through so much, saving each other's lives so many times. From the first time that Castle dived on top of her and took them both to the ground in the apartment where they had found the passport that the Nigerian was so adamantly looking for, to shooting her mother's killer to save Castle before Coonan could give her the details she so desperately needed, it was apparent that they could both count on each other, no matter what the situation was.

It was because of these instances that he was truely her partner, in every sense of the word. They worked together so well, because they were both very similar when it came to cases. It was never enough for them to package things nicely in a box labeled 'Crime Solved'. They wanted to know everything; finding as many answers as they could to give the families closure that they both knew was so immensely important. She chuckled to herself. Now only if he was a real cop, she thought. Then they could be official in the workplace. He would make a damn good one too.

Partner. Yes, he definitely was her partner on the job. But what about outside of the 12th? Resting her head in the sieve of her hands, she took a deep breath. She didn't even know how to begin to think about that.

Correction. She didn't even know how to begin to think about that again.

On to chapter 6! WOO! review both, please! :D:D:D

also, mistakes are my own. i dont think there are many, if at all. :)