AN: Welcome back! Here is the therapy chapter…hope you like it.

Chapter Two – Therapy

Edward Point of View

I looked around the office that the receptionist had happily brought us into. I couldn't believe the things she was thinking. I mean, she works for a vampire despite being a human and she is attracted to everyone. She couldn't take her eyes off of any of us and I heard her murderous thoughts towards my wife in particular. Apparently the twenty-something student had nothing better to do than fantasize about married men. I chuckled as we entered and took in my surroundings.

The therapist was sitting calmly in his chair as we gathered onto the couches that were placed into a circle. I pulled Bella protectively towards me and Alice sat on my other side. I took a peek into her mind and saw my face grimacing. Knowing this could mean nothing good, I sat and waited for the doctor to start talking. As we all sat waiting, I heard a variety of thoughts coming into my mind as my siblings took in their surroundings. Rosalie was attempting to not kill herself and Emmett was thrilled to be there. Jasper was nervously keeping his emotions in line and Alice was redecorating his office in her mind. Esme and Carlisle were thinking positive thoughts as they waited for the doctor to begin.

Finally, he cleared his throat and said "Welcome, I am so glad you could come in. So I thought we could start by getting some things out into the air so I can understand precisely where the problems in this coven are."

I heard internal groans from most of my siblings as they translated what he said as basically "let's talk about our feelings." Esme quickly interjected before we could speak and said "doctor, we believe we are a family, not simply a coven if you don't mind."

"Of course, that is no problem at all. Not a very common thing among vampires but I can work with it. Who would like to start?"

Emmett immediately volunteered and said "you always fight with Rose and I because you are jealous of the incredible chemistry we have together and our incredible sex life."

Jasper instantly laughed and Alice giggled as well. Bella whispered "I think we have them beat" in my ear, low enough that I was the only one who could hear it. I chuckled softly to her and spoke. "Emmett, I think you are delusional. Most of the time we are running away from you if you and Rose are doing something."

"Well, that's the only problem I see."

"Emmett, are you dense? This family is just filled with issues." Rosalie burst out. I could hear her practically yelling before she made her outburst but it was different to actually hear it. "Edward is a control freak, Alice is too and she has serious addiction problems, Jasper is an emotional wreck, Bella thinks she's better than everyone because she's supposedly immune to everything, and Emmett you are just a little slow sometimes and we like to fight with others."

The doctor put up his hands to signal no one else to speak. "Well, thank you Rosalie for telling me about these problems. Let's go in order, Edward, why does your sister think you are a control freak?"

I slid down in my seat slightly, not exactly wanting to own up to everything I do. "I'm unsure doctor. I mean, I just feel protective of my family, especially Bella, my wife."

"That's reasonable. Rosalie? Why does this make him a control freak?"

"Bella, can I see your cell phone?"

Bella took the phone out and threw it to Rose, not realizing her plan and I was powerless to stop her as I didn't realize what was happening. Rose flipped open the phone and opened the recent calls. "Doctor, look here. Bella has called Edward's number 90% of the time on the phone and many of the calls were under 2 minutes long."

I attempted to defend myself, "I was just checking in!"

"Every hour on the hour, Edward? That's a little excessive. I noticed when Alice, Bella, and I went shopping one day."

"Edward, I think that this does border on excessive. You all are vampires and Bella is fairly indestructible as far as I have heard. I also heard she is a shield so I don't think that your concern is warranted. I understand you two began a relationship when she was a human but she can take care of herself now."

"Yes doctor." I muttered. Bella stroked my arm gently and I relaxed into her. She grabbed my arm a little bit tighter and I looked at her in concern. "Is something wrong Bella?"

"Just a little dizzy…nothing to worry about."

I looked towards the doctor who wrote something down on his notepad and continued to speak. "Alice, Rosalie mentioned you next, why are you a control freak and what is your addiction?"

"Well, doctor," Alice began to speak to him as though this should be completely obvious and normal for anyone, "I simply have a flair for fashion and when someone as lovely as Bella is dressing in such awful clothing, I simply must do something about it."

"Alice, you bought me bunches of clothes. If you didn't want me to wear t-shirts, why did you buy them?"

"Because I knew you'd sneak out and buy them yourself. I saw it. I just have to do something about it everytime you wear them. I mean, Bella, you look so much better in nice dresses and skirts and blouses, why don't you wear them? I know Edward agrees."

"Edward? Do you really think I don't look nice like this?"

"You always look beautiful, my Bella."

Alice humphed. " I assume my sister thinks my addiction is shopping. I don't really think I'm addicted though. It is more of a hobby or a pastime for me. I can't help it. I just see some of the cute stuff available and I know it would be perfect for me or one of my siblings. They always love the Christmas presents I buy them the most."

"Um, Alice?"

"Yes, Rose?"

"Do you remember when you got Emmett that bear caller?"

"Of course, he loved it! You see doctor, Emmett's favorite prey is grizzly bears so I just figured he might want something to get them to come to him easier with."

"Alice! Emmett used that thing nonstop for 3 months in the house. He also managed to adjust it so that it could break glass!"

"Oh…I forgot that part. But he did have fun..."

"You bet, Alice. That was the best present. Hey Rose, baby, do we still have that somewhere."

"No, I think I remember Esme destroying it after you destroyed china goblets that Carlisle's parents owned."

The doctor looked a little uncomfortable but recovered quickly. I could hear Esme murmuring in her mind about the things Emmett destroyed with that gift. "Well, moving on, Jasper, why are you an emotional wreck? Does it have something to do with your gift?"

I decided to speak up before Jasper could. "Doctor, Jasper here likes to use his powers for evil at times. Often, when he and Alice are 'in the mood' so to speak, we get to feel the same way. Unfortunately, he also can control what he puts out so when he feels us starting to get close to our pinnacle, he will send us complete depression."

Emmett looked up at me. "Oh…so that's why that keeps happening. I wondered why Rose kept pushing me away…and I kept feeling like someone died."

Jasper spoke up, "Edward, it's not my fault you guys can't finish fast enough to keep up with us."

I heard the doctor cringe internally and Jasper seemed to smile more so he must have felt his embarrassment as well. The doctor turned to us and said "let's continue. I believe Bella, it was mentioned earlier that you were a shield, but you don't think you're better than everyone do you?"

My wife spoke timidly but sincerely to the doctor. "I really don't know what Rose means. I guess she might think that I hold myself up a little taller now that I have such a talent, but that may be because I acted so timidly when they first met me. I guess she is just unused to seeing me in such a light because of the past."

Rose seemed determined to throw everyone under the bus so she spoke fiercely to the doctor. "Doctor, she is constantly threatening us since she is the youngest and if we speak one thing bad, she might snap and attack us."

I hadn't seen that coming. I spoke up instantly, "Rose, Bella only did that a few times and it was when Emmett was making remarks about our sex life, despite her asking him not to."

I heard the doctor think in his head "is this family obsessed with sex or what?" I stifled a chuckle and gently took Bella's hand in mine.

Emmett spoke up then and said "I couldn't help it, you guys just made it too easy. I just wanted to give everyone a laugh."

Bella and I growled at practically the same time and Rose said "see what I mean, doc? There she goes, threatening us again."

Carlisle and Esme had been rather silent this whole time and I heard Carlisle wondering if he should step in and stop it and Esme had resigned herself to let us all get ourselves into trouble.

The doctor signaled us to move on again and he said "Emmett, Rose said you were slow and liked to fight…tell me about that."

"Well doc, sometimes I don't get subtle well. Like for instance, when I'm out hunting, I just go for the prey, I don't stalk it like Eddy and Jasper here do. I just attack it cause I'm strong and can handle it. They must have to compensate for something I guess."

Jasper and I both growled at him and he continued "well, as you can see, I draw lots of anger towards me and I can't do anything about them provoking me. I'm not about to let them win, then my woman might think me less of a man…and I don't want her to have any doubts…"

The doctor looked surprised at his blatancy but he recovered quickly, "well that just leads us to Rose…would anyone like to tell me her problem?"

Alice spoke up first, "well she clearly likes to throw all of us under the bus so to speak and I think that shows deep seeded jealousy. Also, she has an obsession with cars that is unhealthy in my opinion."

Rose grimaced and spoke rapidly. "I just have a good idea of how people are flawed, Alice. I don't like to think of people as perfect. I'm not jealous of everyone; I just want to have them all know what I think about them. And I like cars…that's not a bad thing…"

I spoke up "no, but having sex with one is a little much."

Rose growled at me "I didn't have sex with your car, Edward. Emmett just pressed me up against it and I may have accidentally dented it."

The doctor's thoughts entered my head again and I heard him think "yes, they are completely obsessed with sex in this family."

"Anyway, Carlisle and Esme, is there anything you have to discuss?"

Carlisle spoke, "we are just concerned for our kids is all. I know I work a little too hard but I think Esme and I have a good relationship nonetheless."

Esme smiled and said "I know that I can be a bit of a mom sometimes to the kids but I don't think that's a bad thing. I just want to keep them under control well enough to keep the house in one piece."

The doctor thought something that confused me but I felt that he was blocking some of his thoughts, which I didn't even know was possible. He thought "well, I know where to start now."

A bell rang and the doctor said "unfortunately, that is all the time we have for today. I will have you all back in two weeks to discuss some more, but until then, just work on creating a more bonded family unit. I hope you have a nice two weeks."

We left and I got into a car with Carlisle, Esme and Bella. Esme seemed to be thinking about buying some stuff for Carlisle's car and his wardrobe which I thought was weird. I figured she must be in a redecorating kick again and I brushed my hand against Bella who had laid against my shoulder.

AN: I hope it was funny. If not, I promise it is going to get a LOT better. I can't wait to write what happens next.