Chapter 15 what hurts the most…?

Ever since Fred watched Asheara as she left the shop, he followed her quietly until they reached her house. After that day, Fred observed her every night as she fell asleep. He would watch her willingly and he longed to caress her face. There are some occasions when Fred went in her room just to watch her sleeping soundly. Sometimes, he would laugh when Asheara was muttering something funny.

"Why don't you just talk to her and reverse the spell?" George asked grumpily one night when Fred was readying himself to apparate to Asheara's house.

"I don't want to" Fred said looking at George helplessly.

"Why?" George asked. Fred sighed and sat on the opposite bed on their flat at diagon alley.

"Because… it's like what you said before George…" Fred said. "She must be safe from me. Many death eaters will get a hold on her."

"Fair point, that one. But you're going crazy about this stuff! You're just endangering yourself y'know." George said.

"I know, but I would give anything just to see her. Just to know she's breathing peacefully… just to know she's alive so I won't lose hope" Fred said seriously. George shook his head.

"I never imagined I'd see you like this, Fred. So serious" George said. "If you loved her so much, why do you still keep away?"

"Like I told you, I don't want to hurt her" Fred said.

"Any other reason?" George said.

"None" Fred answered stiffly.

"Come on, I'm your twin! I know there is other reason" George said indignantly. Fred Hesitated but gave up.

"Alright… I'll tell you this." Fred said. "Promise you won't laugh because I'll hex you"

"When did I laugh about serious matters?" George said.

"Like every time" Fred scowled.

"Oh, go on then" George said.

Asheara was watching her favorite late night show, but her thoughts were not focused on the show. She was merely watching, but she was still thinking about her past events. There were some missing links that she could not even fill in. She cannot remember her committing murder, the missing memories of three weeks of July and she even could not remember when somebody said she was living with a guy.

Is this amnesia?

Probably…

How did I have it? I can't recall having an accident…

Maybe its how it worked maybe you forget everything when you got your memories back…

Very funny… it doesn't work like that, does it?

I don't know…

Asheara snapped out of her thoughts when she heard a faint popping noise somewhere. She stood up and investigated the hallways, but there was no one there. It was odd… Maybe the house was haunted? She thought, but she chuckled at this idea. So she resolved by going to bed already.

By the time she was turning her back, she smelled something. It was some strong odor, but was neither pleasant nor unpleasant. It was some familiar odor that she was fond of, something that brought her some memories of some faceless guy. No, it's not perfume, but odor… She shook her head of amusement.

She was climbing the stairs; the odor would follow her… why though? Then Asheara lie on her bed and fell asleep. Fred revealed himself by deactivating the illusion charm. He watched her. He sat on a chair beside her bed and continued watching her intently. How he wanted to touch her face, how he wanted to reverse the spell, how he wanted… to tell her he loves her very much. If he could, then he would… he can't and he won't. For the reason he said to George earlier that night.

Then, he saw something glitter on her neck… he examined it closely, to find out it was the very necklace that he gave her two years ago. He smiled… because he was also wearing the partner of that necklace ever since they departed.

"It's hard like this Ash… but I have to…"

Time passed by after that very event. Albus Dumbledore died after three days because as they said, Severus Snape killed him. Fred kept his spirits up, he was still joking around people to cover up the feeling of loneliness. He still kept visiting Asheara but twice a week or once. Sometimes few times a month after Bill and Fleur's wedding last August. It was becoming hard for Fred to visit her. He was not drawing some attention that might hurt Asheara.

What hurts the most is that when he, Fred; doing everything to see her and Asheara doesn't mind it. But how can she? She doesn't know about him. She doesn't know that she loved him, that it was him that prevented her to go out on a date with another guy. Not that Fred interfered, but she just don't feel going out with someone. She felt as though she was waiting for someone that made her heart closed for several men who offered their heart to her.

One afternoon in June, Dane visits Asheara for some coffee and éclairs. They were discussing some topics mainly for girly stuffs. Dane was discussing how Pete, the one who wants to become Asheara's boyfriend; became Dane's boyfriend.

"Really? I'm glad to hear that" Asheara said cheerfully.

"I think he gave up on you" Dane said sympathetically. "Why didn't you choose him? He was rich, handsome, and not to mention a gentleman." Asheara thought for a moment.

"That's because I just don't feel to like him. He ought to find someone better, now he found you" She said smiling. "I'm still waiting for someone though"

"Who?" Dane asked

"I don't know" Asheara said and Dane laughed. "What?"

"How could you wait for someone you don't know?" Dane asked mockingly.

"Hmm, I'm not sure" Asheara replied pensively. "I think this knows why" Asheara said pointing her chest.

"What—your necklace knows?" Dane asked dumbfounded.

"No, my heart knows" Asheara said smiling.

"Oh… Anyways, nice necklace" Dane said. "Where'd you get it?"

"This?" Asheara asked. She gave this a great thought… because she didn't know where she'd got it. "It didn't occur to me who gave it to me…" Dane was raising her eyebrows at Asheara. "But you know, every time I go to sleep, I would touch this without knowing why…"

"Why would you do that?" Dane asked curiously.

"I don't know, and then I feel like someone was watching me when I sleep. It started Christmas before last Christmas. Every evening I could feel his or her presence… but these past few months, I rarely got that feeling…" Asheara said sadly. "I feel like… I was protected when that presence was around me…"