As always, everything Twilight belongs to Stephanie Meyer

A/N - So it's a much shorter chapter than usual but necessary to transition the story to where I want it to go. HUGE thanks to my beta Georgia Dawgette. Without her it would take weeks for me to post, and she is awesome at breaking my writer's block! Her ideas add so much to the story, and I'm completely hopeless at punctuation so she is the one to thank that this is readable! All of your reviews have been awesome. Thank you for all of them, as well as to those that have put this story on alert or added to favorites. You guys are the best!

Previously

Taking a deep breath I took the plunge. "I love him Alice. Like a lot." I cringed internally, hoping she realized I meant Jasper and not Edward.

With a slight smile Alice said only two words. "I know."

BPOV

"Of course you do." I sighed. "Can I ask you something Alice?"

"Anything." She replied simply.

"Why don't you hate me?" Lord knows I'd hate me if I was her. I was.......am, her best friend, and Jasper's her husband or well he used to be. Not to mention the fact I'd at one time thought myself to be hopelessly in love with her brother. I groaned inwardly, realizing how sordid it all sounded after working out the finer details in my head.

"What reason would I have to hate you Bella?" Alice genuinely looked confused.

Admittedly I wasn't exactly knowledgeable when it came to all the ins and outs of the vampire world, but I did understand somewhat the whole 'mated' thing. Basically, Jasper and I shared an unbreakable bond. Now if I'd spent over half a century with someone only to have them form an unbreakable bond with someone else so soon after our relationship had ended, well I have a feeling I'd be a little pissed about it.

"Ummm Jasper?" His name sounded like a question when I all but choked out my reply.

"Don't be absurd! Didn't he tell you?" Alice sat up straighter as she chastised me for my apparent absurdity.

"Well he told me you were.........well that you were okay with this, and that you were happy for us." I was dumbfounded by what appeared to be automatic acceptance of my relationship with Jasper.

"So what's the problem then?" She appeared completely perplexed.

"I feel like I've betrayed you." I dropped my chin so that I was looking at the floor while I pulled at a loose thread on my sweat pants.

"That is utter nonsense Bella!" Alice's normally high pitched voice sounding a few octaves higher than usual. Sliding her tiny body closer to mine she reached over and firmly grasped my chin, forcing me to look at her. "Now you listen to me Bella Swan, you would never, could never betray me. If anything you are loyal almost to a fault. If anyone is guilty of betraying anyone it's me! What I did, what my entire family did is unforgivable, yet every vision I've had recently shows you doing nothing but showing us forgiveness."

I was struck nearly mute by Alice's rant. Never in a million years had I expected this level of understanding from her. Hollow assurances, empty words........those I had been expecting, not this passionate defense against my self recriminations.

"What else would I do other than forgive Alice? It took Jasper telling me the whole truth about what went down that night, but I now understand the why. Edward in his own warped fucked up way was trying to protect me, and the rest of you were doing what you could to keep your family together by abiding with his wishes." I murmured, while Alice raised her eyebrow at my language.

"I saw what you went through Bella. As soon as I allowed myself to see you again I saw it all. You may forgive us, but I'm not so sure I can ever forgive myself." This was the most subdued I'd ever heard Alice.

A thought suddenly occurred to me......"Is this why you're being so understanding about Jasper and I? Because you think you owe me something?" I asked suddenly suspicious.

"Oh Bella, no not at all." Alice giggled, her mood apparently lifted by my suspicions. "You and Jasper belong together; you've always belonged to each other. Fate just decided to take the long way in getting you two together." She explained.

Fate decided to take the long way? No shit! Fate had more than taken the long way when it came to my life; it had taken the most treacherous, dark, miserable path it could. How does this fate thing work anyway? There are so many what ifs........what if Jasper hadn't tried to attack me at my birthday party, what if Edward hadn't decided to leave, what if Alice and Jasper hadn't had the epiphany that their marriage was over. Not to mention everything I'd felt for Edward, was it all a lie? I couldn't help but wonder if Jasper and I were together because of everything that had occurred or despite it.

If the events of my 18th birthday hadn't taken place would we have still found our way to each other, or would Jasper still be married to Alice and I still with Edward? The loudest voice in my head kept telling me to let it go, live in the now, embrace what I have with Jasper. However, there was a small, niggling voice that kept asking me these questions, seeking to make sense of the situation, needing to justify everything that had taken place since meeting the Cullen's. Again though, I couldn't help but feel that everything I'd experienced in the last two plus years had all been worth it seeing as how in the end, it had all led me to where Jasper and I were now. The loud voice was winning. If there was one thing I'd learned from all of this, it is that happiness can be fleeting, and to grasp it with both hands when it's within reach.

"That's one way of putting it." I verbalized my internal monologue. "I still haven't wrapped my head around all of this Alice. Some of it completely confounds me to be honest, but if there is one thing I am certain of it's my feelings for Jasper."

"It is a bit of a mind fuck isn't it?" Alice asked, a serious expression on her face as she nodded her head in understanding.

I snorted while trying to suppress the laughter threatening to escape. Hearing Alice curse was comparable to her speaking a foreign language, but it had effectively aided in breaking the proverbial ice. However, she had also hit the nail on the head with her apt description of this unique situation.

"What?" Alice arched a perfectly shaped eyebrow at me, obviously unaware at what was provoking my amusement.

"Nothing, nothing." I waved my hand in a dismissing gesture before standing. "I realize we have only a million things to talk about Alice, but this human needs food." I walked towards the kitchen, uncertain if she'd follow me or not.

JPOV

When Alice, and Bella for that matter, had all but forced me to leave my house I had been hesitant. Unbeknownst to Bella I was quite aware that she was purposefully trying to project to me that she was feeling confident and calm. Unlike when she'd managed to completely shut her emotions off to me, I had felt those that she thought she was hiding. Guess her shielding ability was an all or nothing sort of thing.

The only reason I'd even acquiesced to their demands was because I knew without a doubt that Alice truly only had Bella's best interests at heart. If I thought for even a moment that she had an issue with the state of mine and Bella's relationship, there is no way I'd have left Bella to face that level of shit alone.

Bella did have a point though, I needed to hunt. The emotional atmosphere of the past couple of days, the up and down of it all had taken its toll on me. It's not that I was anywhere near out of control or that there was any danger in me hurting Bella, in fact for whatever reason the scent of Bella's blood no longer held any temptation for me. I would have loved to believe that I had managed to build up the type of tolerance Carlisle had to blood, but I knew that wasn't the case. My best bet was that, my need to protect her overrode my desire for what flowed through her veins. It was better to be safe than sorry though, I could not ever let my thirst reach the point where the burn was nearly unbearable. As much as I was certain that I could never bring myself to hurt Bella, I wouldn't take the chance. There was always the chance that my control could slip, and I was more than well aware what the road back from that would be fraught with. So with those thoughts playing a loop in my mind I had gorged myself on whatever animals I could find without straying to far from home. It was slim pickings, but there were times you had to sacrifice quality for quantity as well as location.

The buzzing of my phone in my pocket broke me from my deep absorption in my thoughts. Concerned that it was Bella, needing me back at home I answered quickly without checking the caller ID.

"Bella?" I asked with concern.

Hmmmm...wonder who's calling him.......