Lulu: yo~ this was a one-shot I was writing inbetween chapters, so even though it ends kind of lamely and it may seem a bit OOC, I hope you enjoy it (sorry for any spelling/formatting errors...mostly for formatting errors though...). It's set post-Game...because I think way too realistically...

NOTICE: IF YOU HAVE ANY PROBLEMS WITH THIS FANFICTION, PLEASE DON'T REPORT ME; JUST TELL ME YOUR ISSUES WITH THE PARTICULAR FANFICTION, AND I WILL DO MY BEST TO FIX THEM. I REALLY DON'T LIKE LOSING THE PRECIOUS FANFICTIONS THAT I SPEND TIME WRITING. NO MISTAKE IS TOO SMALL FOR ME TO BE NOTIFIED OF. THANK YOU

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HOMESTUCK, FOR THAT IS OWNED BY ANDREW HUSSIE. I ALSO DON'T OWN THE TDI SERIES, THOUGH I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHO DOES.

WARNING: THE CHARACTERS IN THIS FANFICTION AND THEIR PERSONALITIES MAY NOT BE TRULY CORRECT; THIS IS BECAUSE THE AUTHOR (aka Me) MAY EITHER INTERPRET THEM DIFFERENTLY THAN THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE INTERPRETED, THEY MAY BE CHANGED IN ORDER TO FIT THE SPECIFIC AU, OR IN WORST CASE SCENARIO, THE AUTHOR (again, Me) MAY HAVE HAD THEIR PERCEPTION OF THESE SPECFIC CHARACTERS CHANGED DUE TO READING TOO MANY OTHER FANFICTIONS CENTERING AROUND THESE SPECIFIC CHARACTERS. PLEASE READ THIS FANFICTION WITH THESE THOUGHTS IN MIND. ALSO PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS IS A KARKAT-CENTRIC CHAPTER, SO IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ A KARKAT-CENTRIC CHAPTER, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SKIP TO THE NEXT ONE.

"You do realize that this was going to happen eventually, right?" a familiar robot questions as he looms over what was once his "unshakable" creator. Said creator proceeded to flip his robot the bird, because honestly he really, really wasn't feeling it today. You'd think that when the game ended, everything would be alright; everyone would go back to their places and finally be able to live their lives without the constant threat of death and Lord FUCKING English.

And yet, when the game was over and everyone had woken up, what had happened? Well, firstly everyone was alive, including those that died tragically in the events of the game. That meant that all those trolls that'd tried and failed for two generations? They came back. The people that'd raised you all (well, kind-of; most guardians had died before the game even began)? It was like they'd never died. It was kind of like a dream come true for most…and then they were discovered by their new planet's inhabitants. Who were they? You didn't know; how'd they find out where you were? Another big mystery for the masses; what was their purpose? Well, so far they'd gone out of their way to capture and seemingly quarantine you, so they probably wanted to make sure that you weren't dangerous to whatever society the game had resulted in.

In the two weeks you'd been there (your robot had counted it for you), you'd been poked and prodded at, with rarely any visitors that you actually knew. There was that one visit from Dave, however, that explained that currently they were still just trying to see if their vaccinations had been updated…and after Dave explained to you what vaccinations were, the other faceless people in this nightmare had a lot of fun sticking you with tons of needles. Now you were basically prepared for a lot of shit you barely recognized as a threat, and even then what had happened? You, Dirk Strider, notable badass in your own right, had gotten a severe case of the flu. You hated life, and you certainly hated it more because your creation (Lil Hal) had somehow received a body of his own and was the only person (robot) you could identify with in this place of white walls and forgettable faces. The worst part was that he refused to berate you about how he was right and you were wrong and blah, blah, blah, it all ran together in your head anyway.

"It never surprised me that you would eventually fall ill, but honestly, there was a sixty percent chance that you would've gotten it earlier from your…flirtations with Jake. I mean, I recognize that you were attracted to the male, but realistically he was a walking carrier of a variety of germs that I'm surprised these people have ever even heard of. How you managed to not get some ridiculous jungle-related disease despite the ninety-five percent chance is still extremely baffling –"

"Hal…"

"Yes, Dirk?"

"Shut up." Hal (finally) managed to fulfill your request, though the room's sudden silence had to be ruined once again by another coughing fit. You bent over, releasing a constant stream of coughs and hacking noises that were unfit of a Strider; you really couldn't give a damn, though, it hurt like shit. After what seemed like forever, the coughing smoothed out into ragged breathing, though now you felt nauseous again, which really sucked since you couldn't keep much down anyway. You tried to steady your breathing, tried to make the pain lessen just a little bit…then, of course, Hal comes to your rescue mere seconds later by giving you a trash bin to release your stomach contents in. You hate it that you have to rely on someone else to help you, though you suppose that Hal isn't exactly a bad choice in terms of caretakers for you specifically. Even before the game, Hal had been on your face for what, three years? He certainly knew a lot more about you than you did; he'd known the failure of basically all of your relationships before they even began with mere statistics and the fact that, as he'd said repetitively before, he "was you" only in a computer form.

After about twenty to thirty minutes of you releasing whatever it was you'd eaten, you finally felt the last of the dry heaves shake off and you breathed a sigh as the bucket moved back to the floor. Apparently, Hal had also moved, because he was now half-sitting beside you and half-leaning on the wall. Too tired to struggle, you allowed Hal to move your body so that it laid in his arms, with your head resting somewhat comfortably on the robot's chest. Briefly, you wondered why he did this for you, taking notice when a cold and yet also gentle hand began to attempt the difficult task of massaging away your headache…then you remembered that again, he was you in another form. He was probably just as lonely, though not quite as unsociable, therefore he didn't feel like losing you to illness…not yet at least. After all, besides those blue-blooded trolls you'd heard about through the grape vine (who you'd love to actually meet when this was all over), there was no one in the world who could fix him better than you could.

"...and of course, you and I have the same allies, the same enemies, even the same faces…" You were also the only one who could stand his babbling, which he'd somehow picked up on once again, though you weren't paying much attention. You did freeze, however, at a certain sentence, a certain choice of words that made you look up at his glowing red eyes.

"What did you say?"

"I simply replied that because of our constant similarities to one another, it is only practical –"

"Hal…" the robot sighed, then tipped Dirk's chin upwards slightly, their lips just barely touching.

"With all of our similarities, it's no wonder I have so many things to love about you." you blushed, probably looking lamer than what was even possible for a Strider…but then again…aw screw it, you kissed the adorkable robot. If it didn't work out, you could easily just blame the fever, right?

Lulu: again, kind of lame, but I think it's cute :3 End~