To break is all I know Chapter 22: 4 months later, a bleach fanfic

I do not own Bleach … :) and I do not earn any kind of money from this snippet.

This chapter hadn't been beta-ed yet. I apologize for my usual mistakes. I didn't have enough time to proofread it. I wish you pleasant reading.

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To break is all I know

Chapter 22: 4 months later

"My name is Kurosaki Karin. I am a student in the second year of high school. I am a well-known tomboy and I kick ass whenever someone pisses me off. Some say I'm just a simple-minded fool, but I've stopped listening to other's bullshits a long time ago.

If I am in the mood I kill Hollows in order to help the spirits form being eaten or humans from being murdered. And no I am not a defender of the helpless, just someone who doesn't like to witness a genocide.

I spend my time with Urahara at his shop as he tries to teach me how to control my erratic spiritual energy, but in these 4 mouths he didn't get any results. What can I say … I am still a newbie at this reiatsu thingy.

However my supplementary training with Samaki begins to have visible repercussions. I am more aware of my surroundings and much more careful with my body's movements. He is indeed a pretty good teacher, but I don't want to tell him that. He's already conceited enough.

Believe it or not, I have managed to survive with him for 4 long mouths. These damn miracles really do happen from time to time. Not often though, or my father would not act like a retard all the time! I … we will soon have 5 months since being together. Can you believe it? And here I thought I would never find someone crazy enough o stay with me for a week, let's not talk about so much time. Guess I was wrong. Sometimes it can be so good to be wrong.

Christmas was a little awkward for us, because Aizen is not a Christian and he doesn't believe in our God. Sometimes I swear the only god he sees in his small world is himself.

Valentines Day was a disaster with big D. I just don't want to remember of how Aizen tried to give me chocolates and we had ended up in a hospital bed for 5 days because of food poisoning. His excuse was "I did not know chocolate is not supposed to be mixed with … clorhydric acid" No shit Sherlock. Now that I think, it wasn't really acid, just a dangerous mixture of ingredients, something only Orihime could dream of combining. It doesn't really matter because it sure kept us in the hospital long enough, but I didn't miss the New Year Party dad threw with the Shinigami.

Yuzu had an interesting discussion with that Yumichika gay bastard, at least until I grabbed his collar and took him away from my beautiful sister before he could ask for her hand.

The attraction of the evening was Matsumoto … dancing topless on the table. Don't ask, ok. Just pretend you haven't read that and get on with the lecture.

How I've wished Samaki would have used a stronger acid … not that he had used acid, but you get the idea.

None of my relatives know of my boyfriend (I just cannot use this word) and I plan to keep it that way for at least another 4 months. There is still a part of me who wants to come clean before them, but my intuition tells me they might not like him, or at least have some kind of disagreement with him.

I think the worst would be dad, not because he might begin to talk about grandchildren, because I'm sure he will, but because unlike Yuzu and Ichigo, he can really see a person's inner workings. He may be the only one capable to distinguish Samaki's true nature. I mean … I'm realistic: Samaki is a sociopath, but I like him like this.

However Yuzu remains the biggest problem. She complained to me, two days ago I think, about Aizen being kind of cold towards her. What was I supposed to say?

Don't worry Yuzu he just spends time with me, training and sometimes molesting me. Nothing too serious. We make out in the grass, against a tree (I still have marks on my back from our last session), read porn (this part is a lie), but yeah nothing to be taken seriously. So smile Yuzu, the world is perfect.

For some reason Aizen gets very mad when I use the word molest. I wonder why? In these last months he didn't say anything about creating environmental possibilities in order to take the next step in our relationship (thank god he didn't) even if I did notice he would have wanted to take the initiative a couple of times.

I cannot wait for Samaki to finish with the exams so we can go in the annual trip over the seas. From what I've hear it will be somewhere in Europe, but the council hasn't decided the location yet. Maybe we will go to Spain. I've heard they have an amazing soccer team.

The silver haired Shinigami, who happens to be the Captain of the 3-rd squad, kept on following me the first week. First I thought he was just in love with me and couldn't get enough of my lean muscles, but after two days abundant in silver hair, my first presumption metamorphosed into stalking. Yes he was a stalker. Nothing more nothing less.

I've had my match with Toshiro … don't ask me, because I didn't win … subject closed. I'm not writing about this … no way in hell. (Who would ever write in her diary how she lost to a midget). I'm angry, so I'll make him a midget. Period."

Kurosaki Karin's diary

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Winter had passed rather quickly leaving an empty space in the children's fragile hearts, who desired to see more snow. But soon enough, the next season knocked on the door and, after waiting a little for the temperature to gain some degrees over zero, it began to shake its wings over the frozen nature. Spring bloomed over the world so brutally and suddenly, stretching its arms around the globe, that some nations barely had time to change their wardrobe on such short notice. Japan didn't make an exception, having one of the fastest season-transitions in history.

While some people enjoyed the metaphoric announcement of a bright, new beginning, with sun and lots of flowers, others cursed spring.

However Karin didn't belong to the last group, being, maybe, one of the biggest fans spring ever had. After all Karin loved it with passion, not because it gave life and recreated the green cover, but because during spring the weather was perfect for soccer matches. Not too cold and not unbearably hot, like in the middle of the summer. It was probably the most selfish reason one can have for loving spring, but Karin was neither the poetic type, like Yuzu, nor the dead-after-flowers type, again like her sister. She was practical, logic and very stuck in reality.

Still it would have been hypocritical on her part to say she didn't enjoy being given flowers, especially if they were from Aizen. Thinking about gifts made Karin realize she didn't mind any kind of attention coming from her very annoying friend, no matter if it was doomed to send her in a hospital.

"Ugh" growled Karin "This is excruciatingly boring."

Aizen flipped a page from the book he had deposited in his lap prior to the training session. This strategy of annoying Karin by ignored her pleas was getting unexpected results. But then … it always did.

"Why do I stay with you, god of complexity? Tell me, because I really cannot find a reasonable explanation and believe me I had tried … countless times and I've still failed to find one, single, simple reason" whined Karin loudly.

"That is your problem, not mine" stated Aizen calmly.

Karin sighed and laid her head on his shoulder.

One hour passes without words being shared, while Aizen continued with his lecture and Karin read from the comfortable position of leaning on her friend's shoulder. The silence enveloped the couple.

"My sister had asked about you again" whispered the girl, too soft for someone who snapper at persons instead of talking to them "and I'm out of lies to tell Samaki. I do not like to lie to Yuzu, but at the same time …" Aizen looked at her at the corner of his eye studying the cute Kurosaki frown tugging her eyebrows in a straight line "She deserves someone better"

"Have you just said that I am not good enough for your sister?"

"Yes"

Even after so much time Aizen had problems getting used to her direct way of putting things on the table, both literal and metaphorical.

"Does that mean I am not good enough for you, Karin?" replied the man, being careful to emphasize the "you", at least enough for the girl to catch his moody disposal.

"Not necessarily. Look Samaki, I am not like Yuzu. She is beautiful, gorgeous, an awesome cook, the best mother a child could dream of having. In other words she is the embodiment of perfection. But she's also fragile, innocent, naïve and you, on the other hand, are a snake."

"That hurt"

"I hope it did. You and that man, Ichimaru" Aizen's eyebrow twitched and his lips gathered in a straight line before retaking their usual position in a wide smirk of superiority.

"So … I am a snake. Let's just start from this presumption, false, but still valid in certain situations. If I am a serpent, what does that make you?"

Karin seemed to falter in giving away her opinion and somehow Aizen could understand her reticence of sharing precious information. After all Karin was a smart girl, who knew more about Aizen than no other human being or Shinigami could ever dream of being able to. Maybe Ichimaru had a better understanding of his character, but it was expected from some who had spent 100 long years with him. Karin had known him for approximately 6 months and been in a relationship with him for 4, so being somehow ignorant to his motives wasn't a crime, just a slip on her part.

Scanning the contradictory emotions crossing her face at an abnormal speed, Aizen was more than happy to notice confusion and fear mirrored in her dark blue eyes.

Then he gave her a short peck on the lips, probably trying to confuse her even more. The real make out sessions were usually kept for the trainings, because during those particular moments they were heated up and in the mood to lose time.

"See you at practice Karin" he whispered against the shell of her ear.

Then he danced out of her vision, letting her reflect on different matters involving him and his characteristic behavior.

"It makes me your prey" mumbled Karin, not realizing how right she was "it makes me something I do not wish to be"

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Toshiro was napping on the couch when the front door was brutally slammed and heavy steps echoed in the room. He grabbed a pillow and stuffed it over his head, but an annoying voice didn't fail to wake him up again. Again being the key word.

"Captain" sang Matsumoto

"Go away" his voice resonated from under the pillow.

"But Captain" she pouted "You're being so mean with the poor me. I haven't done anything wrong these last few days. You have no reason to be upset at me, at least to my knowledge."

Toshiro gritted his teeth and to add to this picture of pure stress, his eyebrow twitched in an involuntary nervous act of annoyance. As a result the pillow deposited over his head flew by Matsumoto's ear and she was offered the unforgettable, yet somehow common, sight of her captain's overly angered out of boundaries face. And, if the face wasn't enough, the harsh tone he had decided to use in that particular day didn't leave place for discussion.

"That's because you didn't do anything. How could I be upset over some thing that you did, if you don't even bother to come to the meetings and let's not forget the search parties? Enlighten me Matsumoto, because I cannot understand."

"It was this dress …" complained the woman in her usual evasive style.

"Spare me Matsumoto. I want the real reason, not some half assed excuse."

With the face of a still undecided woman, Matsumoto dared to state her mind.

"Captain… do you really think Aizen is here? In Karakura?"

And she didn't regret it, especially when Toshiro sighed, but seemed to share her concerns.

"I don't know, but if he is … then where is he hiding? That is the real question"

"He can't be here" she emphasized "if he was here … Ichimaru would know his hiding place."

"How can you be so sure? I thought you didn't like, trust Ichimaru" mumbled Toshiro, not wanting to sound disrespectful to a fellow captain, especially after spending 4 long months sharing a hotel bed with him, but he was indeed very reticent at trusting him.

"I don't trust him in the least, but if he cannot find Aizen ... Nobody can."

Toshiro raised an eyebrow at Matsumoto, being slightly amused by her unintended mistake. She hadn't declined liking Ichimaru, just trusting him. Sometimes the boy wondered how she managed to love a man who had hurt her as much as Ichimaru did. He knew love was not conditioned by trivial things like appearance, but to go to such lengths for a pig like Ichimaru, made Toshiro feel sick in the stomach.

The only one who could be described as worse than that snake was Aizen and Toshiro knew Ichimaru wouldn't be happy hearing this unfair comparison. There were times when Toshiro couldn't see Aizen caring about anyone, even if he had blindly believed the traitor had cared enough for Hinamori, at least enough to leave her alive.

But with all her subjectivity, Matsumoto still made a valid point in the fast question exchange. If Ichimaru, who knew Aizen like the back of his hand, couldn't find the ex-Shinigami Captain, then neither Toshiro, nor Matsumoto could ever dream of guessing his location.

"Captain? Are you ok?" asked the woman when silence engulfed the youngster.

"I'm fine. I'll talk to Ichimaru tonight and decide if we should continue the search or postpone it after receiving new information from Soul Society."

"Mayuri should have found something new till now" she cried, having one of her usual drama queen episodes.

"He didn't, or we would have been noticed" confessed Toshiro "but it won't hurt to ask"

Matsumoto smiled a little at the chibi captain, studying his relaxed pose. Ironically, coming in the human world had a benefic effect on him. Usually one would think that .working was stressful, but paperwork was even worse. Matsumoto believed Toshiro was calmer in his usually volcanic reactions also because Karin was around him at least two hours per day, not only due to a cut in the paperwork duty.

"What's with that face?" grumbled Toshiro "you know what ... I don't want to ask, because whatever you are thinking is probably falling in the censored area."

"Captain you're being unfair" smiled Matsumoto, wiggling her hips in a funny way.

The gesture held a note of amusement and not sensual as it was expected from the busty lieutenant.

"I'm a realist" snapped Toshiro "And don't make me unfair after working on your damn paperwork for a whole decade."

"But you are!"

"Go and find Hinamori and I'll go talk with Ichimaru" replied the captain almost like he didn't hear his lieutenant's usual derpy whining.

"but captain, I saw this very beautiful pair of earrings made from gold and they were ..."

"I don't care" growled Toshiro, trying to prevent an ice cataclysm from erupting due to touching human bounds of annoyance "Go and bring Hinamori … now"

The Captain's strong voice thundered in the room, literally striking Matsumoto with its lack of softness. Even in his worst days, Toshiro had never dared, or just didn't feel the need to attack her with an emotionless tone. Usually a threatening glare and a not so subtle notice regarding her sake stack was enough to get her on the right track. This made the woman see that her leader was indeed approaching a mental breakdown and judging the way Ichimaru acted around them made Matsumoto even more pessimistic about their chances of ever finding Aizen.

'And when we will, it will probably be too late.'

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Meanwhile in Karakura High School the soccer team was having the weekly two hour practice.

"Samaki! Catch the ball" screamed Karin from the other side of the soccer field. She began to wave her hands frantically over the head when her voice didn't reach Aizen. It was probably her way of attracting his attention "Then pass it to … for god's sake I have told you to grab the ball! Is it really that hard?" yelled Karin, this time her voice betraying a high level of annoyance.

Aizen rolled his eyes, a gesture he kept away only for Karin to see, and ran after the ball, colliding with another teammate by mistake. Karin began to laugh, but was soon silenced by a ball approaching her position. She ducked under the object, letting it pass over her head and into Tony's inattentive face.

"Asshole!" she shouted "You are the biggest ASS ever!"

"The language Kurosaki" threatened the team's coach, who was –ironically- reading an improper magazine right in front of them.

Karin fumed some more, but vented her anger on the whole team, which had to suffer the girl's aggravating state, plus one of the most strenuous practices they had ever experienced since being part of the soccer team. She was merciless and some began to compare her to devil's reincarnation, not knowing that the title already belonged to someone else.

After two hours of practice which consisted more in a war between the two key members of the team, Karin and Samaki, than a friendly practice between teammates (not forgetting about killing the team of course), the boys and the girl retired in their reserved lockers: the boys in the boy section and Karin in the other one.

Aizen was changing his clothes with some dry ones, when Tony decided to approach him in a discrete way. Something he had never done before.

"You always fight so much with Captain-sama" cried Tony "And then she vents her frustrations on us, all because you manage to anger her to such extents. If it wasn't in my detriment I would applaud your guts, but it is, so …"

Aizen put on his innocent face and said "I do not mean to get her angry. The one who would ever want to see her mad would probably be a delusional masochist" smiled Aizen, thinking that maybe he had a couple of masochist tendencies if he was willing to make Karin mad just because she was sexier that way "She's just too temperamental and I cannot help to disagree with her in certain matters."

He continued to explain his somehow twisted, but right, kind of logic.

"Look man" Tony patted his shoulder affectionately, like he was about to give a lecture to a naïve little child who didn't know where babies come from "She's a woman and woman have this bad habit of being bitches, so from time to time, you should just let her force her own decisions even if the solution makes no sense."

"I see" stated Aizen dryly.

Talking with his teammates depressed him like nothing else could manage to, because it destroyed, little by little, the little respect he had left for human beings. The only humans capable of arising his interest were the Kurosakis, leaving aside Yuzu, who, apart from her abnormal kindness, had nothing too special about her. Or at least that was his low opinion of her. Plus he found struggling prey like Karin and Ichigo to be the ones who had the most potential in interesting him.

'Like I'll ever agree with that Kurosaki. Like I'll ever agree with any Kurosaki for that matter.'

Tony smirked and left.

After another short, yet useless, exchange between teammates, which consisted more in sharing pleasantries and/or gossips than talking about future soccer strategies, the group scattered slowly, some of them going home and the others dashing at their optional classes. Aizen was the last boy to leave the room, being followed by Karin, who came from the opposite room, which was kept especially for girls. Since she was the only girl in the team, she had the utmost privacy.

"Karin?" asked Aizen, trying to attract her attention.

She urged him to shut up and continued to type on her mobile phone.

"Can you leave the phone for a second and talk with me?" said Aizen calmly.

When Karin didn't seem to respond to his question, he decided to ask again, thinking she didn't hear it because of a loud noise coming from the other side of the crowded street.

"I'm talking with you right now. There is no need for your first wish" replied Karin, making Aizen understand she hadn't been able to hear him, not because of some loud cheer, but because she was too engrossed in the action of typing the hell out of her phone.

"I find it rather disturbing to talk with you while you do not even try to pay attention" complained the man.

"Someone is jealous …"

Aizen rolled his eyes, but didn't contradict her words, already knowing that talking her through would be in vain. She was a stubborn Kurosaki after all.

"Don't make that face. It's unbeautiful" babbled Karin with her attention totally lost in texting "I can't believe I've used this word?" snapped Karin at herself, this being her way of punishing her mouth for talking before thinking "I swear Yumicika is as contagious as plague"

Azien would have chucked at her amusing Yumichika like comment, but not being the type to express his real feelings so openly, he gave Karin a sarcastic smirk and puffed a little. She didn't look annoyed, probably because of a long time of being accustomed to his way of behaving. She was also aware that in private he was one of the most cuddling, sweet people she had ever had the honor to meet.

"I just need to tell Urahara that I'll be late for his tea party" continued Karin to give details about her texting partner.

Aizen's heart skipped a beat when hearing the scientist's name. 'What does Urahara need with her. Maybe I'm just being paranoid' he was reticent in confessing his worries about whatever Urahara had planned for his partner. Of course it didn't take him long to understand that tea party was an alias for something Karin didn't want to share with him, but what bothered him wasn't Karin hiding nothings from him, but spending time with Urahara Kitsuke. It was also quite possible for the scientist to have dark plans for the Kurosaki girl, especially if he had seen the huge potential hidden under a thick layer of uncontrollable reiatsu. Not that he was worried for Karin. She was strong enough to keep up with the man and having Ichigo as a brother and Isshin as a father came as an advantage.

Still why had Karin had to spend time with his worst enemies? Starting with Urahara and Toshiro and ending with his arch enemy Kurosaki Ichigo.

"By the way … did you hear where our annual trip will be?" asked Karin while stuffing the mobile in the breast pocket of her coat.

Following a totally different trail of thoughts Aizen answered, without paying attention to the words Karin did so kindly share with him.

"No"

His reticence astonished her and for one moment she had the strange feeling that Aizen was sulking. But Aizen didn't do childish things like sulking thought Karin and continued with her statement, without realizing the truth lurking behind them.

"We are visiting the city of love" mumbled Karin, being her turn to give a sweet pout of disappointment.

"City of love …" remarked Aizen, raising an eyebrow at the angsty expression plastered on her face.

"Yes … Paris"

Karin's mood began to drop and along with it, Aizen's curiosity began to rise proportionally.

"Why do you look like a brick hit you in the head? From what I've heard Paris is supposed to be this very amazing place …"

While throwing an aggravating glare at a pedestrian who was happening to eye a woman's behind, Karin mumbled under her breath a short "Spain" and gained speed so Aizen wouldn't be able to keep up with her. Unluckily for her, the man was very able in getting information out of her, even if the said information was not sharable.

"I didn't catch that"

"Because I wanna go to Spain!" screamed Karin, being force to censure her tone level when an old man commented on teenagers nowadays "They have this also very amazing and awesome football team. I thought the council will choose a different place … What's with that face?"

"Nothing"

"Tell me."

Aizen knew Karin won't leave him alone until he decided to answer. Usually he would just ignore her and play the unapproachable type, but this ended with them running in circles and Aizen didn't feel like wasting precious time.

He grabbed her elbow, gently, and wrapped his other hand around her neck.

"I'm going to the city of love with my lover. What is it more to wish?"

If this statement didn't take Karin by surprise, nothing did. Sure she was used to his somehow exaggerated romanticism, but this sweet, diabetes-inducing declaration of love or something resembling it, made Karin see their relationship from a different perspective. It took all her self control not to blush like a schoolgirl who had just been complimented by her sweetheart. After she was one hundred percent sure her voice would not tremble, the girl regained her composure and attacked Aizen with her all-lasting sarcasm.

"4 months" she said with a fake melancholy, which concealed an ironic idea "We've been together for 4 months and I still cannot believe you're this hopeless romantic who runs after ghosts."

"Am I?" countered Aizen, his soft breath blowing short puffs of hot air into her ear.

"I think so, but then again: One cannot always be sure of what the other believes in."

Aizen grinned.

"Still as cautious as always."

"Damn right!"

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I'm sorry for not updating earlier, but you know school … a tone of projects, lack of ideas and so on. I think this chapter was the hardest to write, probably because it was the first from a new arc and I had no idea what I was supposed to write as an introduction. Hope it will come easier in time.

So again sorry for the late update, but school… and I've begun tutoring some kids and you could say it's a mini-job. Plus the masochist in me had to take some optional classes. Right now I leave at 8 AM and come back a 8 PM (including Saturday) and my only free time is Sunday (when I have to do my homework) I have a huge stack of messages I have yet to respond and an even bigger stack of unread stories.

Why I chose France? It's pretty complicated. First of all I wanted to be Europe (egocentric reasons) I intended to pick Spain, because it has an amazing soccer team and all that (the perfect place for our soccer addicted Kurosaki Karin), but realized I don't know Spanish XD Also it complemented my future plot perfectly. When the time comes, you'll understand what I mean. Probably in the next chapter … our heroes begin preparations for la ville d'amour. And a birthday gift for Karin.