Earlier that night

Sasuke turned the shower off, squeezing his eyes shut at the sudden silence that overtook the room. He'd made the glass and mirror all steamy, and he had to rub the surface with the towel that was around his neck. Normally, he wasn't that vain to check his post-shower self in the mirror, but he had to look somewhat presentable in front of Neji because…well just because it was Neji. If Sasuke had been fussy about Suigetsu's cleanliness, Neji was a hypochondriac extremist.

Sasuke rubbed the towel around his face, as if its fluffiness would wake him up and prepare him for his imminent confession. He looked at the closed door that separated him and Neji. He wondered what the Hyuuga was thinking about. Then he looked down at himself, with the other terrycloth towel wrapped tightly around his hips. He reached towards the sink, next to which he'd piled his clothes, put on the short sleeved white top and the blue track pants. He tightened the waistband and took a deep breath.

He walked out.

The rush of cold air from the main room mingled with the humid steaminess of the bathroom. Neji was seated next to the small table, wrapped in a blanket. He looked cold: the tip of his nose was reddish. Neji was always a bit more prone to cold than anyone else Sasuke knew.

Neji only glanced up at Sasuke as he came in. Sasuke sat tentatively on the edge of the bed and leaning forward, letting his wet hair fall over his face so he didn't have to look Neji in the eye.

"It all started when…when I wanted to get away from Orochimaru," he started. This was the easy part: when he didn't have to mention Itachi or Suigetsu. Nevertheless, he took a deep breath. "I wanted a team, of course, I mean I—," he bit his lip. "You know I'd very much prefer to go solo, but I needed helpers, to complete everything in time,"

Neji didn't ask what it was Sasuke had planned and was planning at that very moment. He'd decided ages ago he never ever wanted to know.

"The other two—you don't need to know about. It's just Sui..getsu,"

Sasuke choked a bit. Someone yelled outside drunkenly.

"Go on," Neji egged, his voice somewhat muffled behind the blanket.

"I went to him, and…the attraction was just…," he glanced at Neji with a pang of worry. This was one of the rare moments Sasuke felt truly emotional. "Are you certain you are okay with this?"

Neji's body seemed to stiffen.

"I'm fine,"

I thought you'd tell me more about why you left, Neji thought. But I'll listen to this first, I suppose. He hesitated to add if it'll make you feel better.

Sasuke swallowed hard. Neji resisted the urge to go over and pat him on the shoulder.

"I didn't know he and Itachi had a history," he went on. He fingers were playing with each other nervously. "It's just…highly improbable. Never would have crossed my mind. But they did, and for three months Suigetsu—," he stopped. "I always thought it was strange he would go away every once in a while, but I always thought it was a phase. I forgave him because it wasn't that often,"

Neji coughed, interrupting Sasuke's burst of speech.

"A…are you cold?"

Neji shook his head defiantly. Sasuke lapsed into a silence. His head was full of thoughts. Possibilities, what he could do…he got up and walked over to Neji, who looked adorably vulnerable. He pulled up a chair and sat across from him, purposefully close, so their knees almost touched.

"But…that shit doesn't matter anymore," Sasuke said weakly. Neji could tell he was still suffering from the ferocious impact of his cheating boyfriend and lying older brother. But thinking selfishly, all Neji could think about was what about me?

"What matters now is…,"

"If Itachi had not brought me to you," Neji interrupted coolly. "Would you have come to find me, and given me this explanation?"

Sasuke froze. Fuck. The thing was, he most probably wouldn't have—

"I knew it," Neji said quietly, his voice bubbling with repressed anger.

"I wouldn't have wanted to face you again after all tha…that," Sasuke protested, knowing he sounded like he was making up excuses. It was partially true. He had thought about all the things he would say to Neji if he ever saw him again, but none of it had played out like he had imagined. But most of all… he decided he would never, ever want to face Neji ever again and would try to avoid him at all costs.

Neji shot him an acidic look, well achieved through his pupil-free eyes. Sasuke frowned, looking so truly remorseful Neji made a note to soften his words a bit in the future.

"I never thought I'd see you again,"

"Why not?" Neji demanded.

"Because I'd feel ashamed of myself," Sasuke said. "I never thought that what I was doing was wrong. It seemed right to me, like the perfect road," his eyes shone at the thought. "but just…when I thought of you, all of that changed and I felt stupid,"

Sasuke paused, wondering if he should say the next part.

"I was just hoping…you know, like—,"

"Out of sight, out of mind," Neji finished, sounding hurt. Dammit, Sasuke thought. Even after all these years, Neji could still read his mind? What the hell was this? And why couldn't it work two ways?

Sasuke put his head down again. He looked at the blanket wrapped around Neji. The Hyuuga shifted uncomfortably. What Sasuke had just said wasn't exactly news, but he'd wanted to hear it straight from the guy just to be sure. The previous millions of options Neji had thought up ebbed away. Even if he'd prepared himself for such a verbal lash, it still hrut like thousands and thousands of needles stabbing into his heart and brain like they were pin cushions.

Neji coughed again, then sneezed. It made Sasuke look up again.

"Neji," he said. There was no pleading note in his voice. He was just saying Neji's name. But they both knew he wanted Neji to forgive him. Badly. Now that he was here, it changed everything. Maybe Sasuke did have something to thank Itachi for, for once.

Neji closed his eyes. He was getting kind of drowsy. He hated it when he was more susceptible to the cold than anyone else.

Sasuke knew this of course. He reached out hesitantly, slowly, testing the waters, and put a hand on Neji's arm. He gave it a light squeeze. "You want to sleep?"

Neji's eyelids drooped. He didn't want to admit it, but—

He got up. Sasuke's grip fell. Neji headed over to the bed, not giving a shit what Suigetsu and Sasuke had done on it and lay down, drawing the blanket up to his chin and kicking the rest of it over his legs. He shivered involuntarily, achoo-ing softly into the blanket. Sasuke walked over and looked at him with slightly worry. He reached over and closed the window, leaving a crack open for ventilation. He grabbed the blanket he and Suigetsu had shared the night before and tossed it into the basket in the bathroom. Then he walked outside, trying to locate where Neji had gotten the blanket. He found, took two, and walked back.

Sasuke placed one on top of Neji carefully. His sudden acts of homeliness were new, even to him. But he'd felt bad ever since he saw Neji's grown up face again, and…I guess this is part of how I think I'm making it up to him. Sasuke sat gingerly on the other side of the bed, the remaining folded blanket in his lap. His hair was still damp. Usually, he never slept with his hair wet, but tonight he decided to try it. He lay his head down slowly and pulled the blanket over him. He inched closer to Neji. Beneath his closed eyelids, Sasuke could see his eyes moving.

He's dreaming, Sasuke thought. He wanted so much to reach over and hug him to sleep. But he couldn't.

Neji would kill me, he thought sadly. Instead, he inched his hand forwards and slipped it beneath Neji's two layers of blanket. He found the Hyuuga's hand; one was tucked under the pillow he was sleeping on, and the other was placed near his stomach. Sasuke could feel his chest heave as he breathed. He let his fingers just graze his. No reaction. He really is asleep then. Sasuke's finger crept forward. He took a few of Neji's in his.

Now I can sleep.