A/N: First in the cell phone series (AKA my way of getting other people at the cabin). In typical Stargate fashion, here's a lot of technobabble before the good stuff.
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Take 20: Eight bars
Category for this take: Sci-Fi
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"This is great."
"I told ya!"
"I can't believe we didn't do this years ago."
"Yes, well, let's not dwell."
"Didn't that tape say there were no fish in your pond?"
"Close enough."
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"Carter, what are you doing with that cell phone?"
"I'm checking to see if Cassie called."
"Oh. That's ok. I thought maybe you were checking to see if the SGC called."
"Well, they might call too."
"They better not. You are on downtime."
"Like that excuse ever works, Sir."
"Wait a second. Do you actually get a signal here?"
"Yes. I must have a better service provider than you do, Sir."
"No. That's not it. Hand over your phone."
"Why?"
"Colonel."
"Sorry, here it is, Sir."
"See I know the local cell tower was knocked out a couple of weeks ago. Nobody should have a... signal... Carter, how do you have eight bars?"
"The Prometheus must be back in orbit."
"What?"
"You realize that despite what the ads say, the number of bars normally doesn't mean much. No bars means no signal, but after that the number of bars can be completely faked by software. More bars means a stronger signal, but there is no standard for what 1 bar, 2 bars, and 5 bars mean."
"Ok, but you have eight bars."
"Right. I tweaked the bar display when I upgraded my phone. Zero through five bars are 'normal'. Six bars is for the civilian sat phone network, so I have to enable encryption for secure calls. Seven bars is for the military sat phone network. Eight bars is for communication piggy-backed through the Prometheus' network or any future X-303 or 304. I'm working on a ninth-bar update that will link in to the Tok'ra subspace network. If you want I could upgrade your phone, Sir."
"Hell no. Personally, I like the idea of having no service when I am on vacation in Minnesota. That way no one can find me."
"Oh."
"Those few I don't mind seeing have an open invitation to join me. Like you, Sam."