Author's Note: I will never be able to describe what kind of hell I had to go through to get this chapter out by today, both personally and technically. So I hope you enjoy, and please review!

Chapter XXIV

Returning their attention to the story, the annoyed meerkat continued reading. In the fanfic after Timon had first met Zuri and her colony, he and Pumbaa went back to the oasis at last to be reunited with Ma, Uncle Max and the rest of his family too. At first the seven listeners got some good, amusing laughs out of the interactions between Timon and his mother, but then Timon began to talk to himself about the female he saw. And what he said made no effort to deny that he was love-struck.

"Just another pretty face... just forget about her, Timon. She's your typical meerkat female who sings and dances... well. Really, really well. And you're just dying to hear a woman besides your mother to say she loves you.

"Ohh, sounds like someone's interested in her!" Nala teased, prompting the others to laugh.

"This is definitely going to be good." Kiara said, scooting in closer to Kovu as she did. Timon smacked his hand upon his face.

"And they wonder why I haven't gotten a girlfriend yet..." He mumbled.

In any case, he went forth. Pumbaa noticed Timon's suddenly depressed mood and chose to talk to him about it, deducing that his friend was in love. At first Timon wanted to forget about Zuri, but Pumbaa pressed onwards with the issue. Through some surprisingly humorous and natural sounding dialogue between them, Pumbaa resorted to reverse psychology to get him to return to her colony. Everybody laughed when this was read off to them.

"You're scared of rejection, that's why you're not going."

"Not!" Timon stamped his foot in the dirt.

"Too!" Pumbaa stamped his front right foot in the dirt.

"Oh, yeah? I'll show you, Porky! I'm going and that's final! Cover for me!" Timon turned on his heels and marched in the opposite direction Pumbaa was facing. Pumbaa watched him march away, and then he grinned to himself.

"Just have to know which buttons to push," Pumbaa said to himself, then padded off in the opposite direction.

"Geeze, it's like this really happened or something!" Simba said in between snickers. "This is spot on how you guys would act, I can't believe it!"

"You know what I'm glad for?" Kopa started. "I'm glad they didn't make Timon fall in love with Pumbaa or anything."

Vitani shuddered at the thought of that. "Yeah, you'd think someone would've done that by now, you know?"

Pumbaa sighed. He said to himself, "If you're hoping that hasn't been done, Vitani, boy are you gonna be disappointed."

Moving forth, when Timon reached the Pride Lands once more to meet with the female again, he saw Zuri nearby the Water Hole. He was about to go and meet her once more until a male meerkat he'd never seen before, named Makali, approached her first. Makali appeared to be her fiance.

"Aw crap, not this." Kiara muttered, placing a paw over her eyes for a moment.

"And the plot thickens..." Kovu taunted in a tone that made it clear he was making fun of the meerkat. He picked up on this immediately.

"It's not funny, Kovu!" He said defensively. It took all of the lion's self control not to burst out laughing right then and there.

Timon went on, "Okay, then. How would you like it if you were in love with Kiara for the first time and she already had a fiance?!"

Kovu immediately stopped laughing when he said this, and his ears drooped slightly at such a depressing thought. His mate seemed to notice this and she gave him a smile.

"I would've torn his throat out to be with you, then." She said jokingly and softly. Kovu glanced over to her. "I probably would've torn off more than that."

Back to the story, Timon was angered at the sight of this and he kicked some dirt in front of him. However, he didn't see a rock on the ground and it struck his foot, making him scream.

"Ye-ow!" he cried out, then he hopped backwards on one foot while holding his other foot. "Ow, ow, ow! That was dumb!" he said to himself, and then he yelped as he ended up falling backwards into the watering hole.

"Wow, and they say Kiara's the dumb one?" Minara suddenly cut in.

"For Christ's sakes, would you stop biting my head off here?" The meerkat protested, which just prompted a few of the others to snicker.

Timon smacked his hand against his face, rubbing his eyes while groaning. From here on out, he could tell that nobody around him was going to let up on him about this. Not that anyone else had a problem with that, of course.

In the fanfic, Zuri got the chance to actually talk to Timon this time. And it turned out that despite what it looked like, Zuri did not love Makali in the slightest, and that she was only marrying him because it was her colony's tradition. Here, serious interest began to pick up for this listeners, as now they genuinely wanted to know how this would go down.

"... Timon... Makali is not my boyfriend."

"OK, so Makali's your fiancé," Timon shrugged.

Zuri let out a disgusted sigh. "I hate hearing those two words in the same sentence."

"You're engaged to a guy you don't even like?"

"My family is deep into tradition, including arranged marriages."

"That can't be legal."

"Oh, and yet drawing two cubs have sex on the Internet is?" Timon whispered to himself.

But just as Timon and Zuri's conversation was getting good, Zuri's father named Shomari came around. And as expected, he was not happy to see a 'rogue' as he called him.

"There is such a thing as a father being over-protective of his daughter, Shomari," Timon said in a low voice.

"Oh gee, I didn't know you were in this story, Simba." Minara suddenly taunted, prompting Kiara to snicker loudly. Simba sighed.

"At least I had a reason for being like that." He said tiredly. "What's his excuse? Where's his dead son?"

In the story, Shomari angrily prompted Timon to return to his own colony, and at first he obliged. But then as he was leaving, Zuri came up through a hole and continued to talk to him. The two decided that they would meet again since Zuri was gaining interest in the "rogue", and Timon chose to go to Pride Rock to waste a few hours until the time for the secret meeting would happen. He slept in the den until Kiara woke him up after sunset.

"Nothing big... I'm just going to compare colony behaviors with this meerkat I met yesterday. She's really curious."

Kiara cocked a brow and grinned. "She?"

Timon turned and blushed slightly. "Hey, just because she's a girl doesn't mean anything."

"Be on your best behavior, Timon," Kiara giggled.

"Yeah, and draw her like one of your French girls while you're at it, too." The meerkat taunted sarcastically as he paused for a moment.

That night, Timon and Zuri met atop a fallen log at the Water Hole. And there, Zuri was able to express how depressing her life truly was, with the arranged marriages and living on constant fear, plus how no one ever listens to her or never gets to do what she wants.

"You know", Kovu started. "Minus the arranged marriages, this sums up my childhood perfectly."

Vitani perked up, facing her brother now. "I wouldn't say that just yet, Kovu." She said. "Until they say something about her mother slashing her in the face every morning just to wake her up, then I don't see it!"

Choosing to ignore that sudden outburst this time and knowing it was only a mood swing once more, they went on. Zuri was talking to Timon about how unimportent she felt, and that she got no excitement and how she thought she was just another face in the crowd. Timon comforted her when she said this. Then the two of them went to the subject of Timon's colony and he told her of the jungle where they resided. Zuri refused to believe that such a place could even exist.

"You could've just gotten me over to her, Timon." Simba commented. "I would've told her first hand. Hell, I've been there, even!"

The meerkat sighed. "And what makes you think she'd believe you either, Simba?"

Simba shrugged. "Well, who do you think she's less likely to argue with: You, or a freaking lion who happens to be the king of where she lives?"

Timon gave his old friend a blank stare for a moment. "Yeah... good point."

And then, the conversation shifted to this:

Timon looked at her a moment. "I'm sure Shomari means well. He doesn't want you to get into anything that could get you hurt. All fathers care for their kids."

"Yeah, sure..."

Timon shook his head and then looked up at the stars. "At least yours is still around physically. My father died saving me from a pack of hyenas."

Zuri cocked her head at him, a bit curious. "Really? Sorry to hear that. He sounds like that one meerkat, uh, what's his name...?"

Timon turned his eyes to her. "Fearless Buzz?"

Zuri smiled and snapped her fingers. "Yeah, that's it."

Timon nodded. "He was my father." Zuri arched a brow. "I mean it!"

"I don't know... you're telling me a lot of things that are too good to be true."

"Anyway, he told me to find a better life for my colony, so no one would have to go the way he did. And I did. We live in that oasis now and we're living the Hakuna Matata life."

"Holy sh-crap!" Timon snapped standing up, just barely avoiding swearing at the last second. "That's exactly how it happened! That is precisely, word for word what happened to him!"

Simba perked up when he said this, now giving his friend a rather sympathetic look. "Really?" He asked.

"I'm so sorry, Timon." Kiara said sincerely. The meerkat exhaled deeply. "Thanks, Kiara."

"Yeah, no one should have to go through that." Minara spoke, which earned her a bit of a weak smile from Timon.

"You never mentioned your father before, Timon." Nala added curiously. He sighed.

"Neither did you, sister... neither did you."

"Yes I did!" She protested. "I've talked about my father before, you just weren't here to listen."

Simba added, "And the one time you were, you were daydreaming about things I'm afraid to even know."

In his mind, he thought to himself, You have no idea how many fan wars you could've prevented by saying that sooner...

Back to the fanfic, Timon eagerly offered to take Zuri to the oasis himself in order to really prove that the oasis really existed, but Zuri didn't want to at the time so that her family wouldn't notice her absence. And then another warm moment passed between them when Timon had sincerely called her things like special and pretty.

"Do you mean that?"

"That I'm leaving? Yeah."

Zuri shook her head. "No, no, no. I mean what you said before you said you were going, before the 'we've gotten off-topic again.' Do you mean that?" Timon looked at up at her and nodded. "Really?"

Timon looked up at her for a few moments, and then he nodded, "Really, really."

Zuri made a few motions with her paws, but didn't speak for a few moments. Then she smiled. "Thanks. I never had someone like you say such things like that before and mean it. It's... refreshing."

Timon grinned. "No problem." He rubbed the back of his neck. "Mind if I stop by again?"

"If you want. Same place tomorrow morning?"

Timon smiled and nodded. "Deal."

"Awww!" Kiara cooed. "That's so sweet of you, Timon!"

"This is adorable!" Minara decided to add. Timon sighed in embarrassment, as he was practically expecting this kind of thing from the lionesses at this point.

"This is really nice, Timon." Simba added.

But expecting that sort of thing from the male lions on the other hand, he was not.

Back in the jungle where Pumbaa was starting to worry about Timon's whereabouts, Zazu suddenly flew in with a message from his friend. He said that Timon was going to be staying longer in the Pride Lands and that he would have to keep covering for him so his Ma or Uncle Max wouldn't get suspicious. Suffice to say, he wasn't too thrilled about this news.

"WHAT?!" Pumbaa grabbed Zazu by the front of his feathers and shook him. "I can't continue living this lie! I don't have any more excuses to give Timon's mother about-!" He noticed Zazu making a quiet motion with his feathers. Zazu pointed behind Pumbaa. Pumbaa looked and gulped. Timon's mother, Uncle Max, and Pete were standing there with their arms folded in front of their chests. He nervously chuckled and smiled. "When did you guys get here?"

"When you started screaming," Pete said.

Simba, Kiara and Kopa all laughed hysterically at this, enjoying this story as a whole as of then for how realistic it was in terms of dialogue. "Now that is what I call bad timing!" Kovu sneered, resisting the urge to laugh.

Timon glared at him. "Yeah, and having your evil family attack Simba just when he's getting to know you. Are you ready to tell me that wasn't bad timing too, kid?"

Kovu's playful smile suddenly fell apart and he bowed his head, unfortunately remembering what had happened that day of the ambush so long ago. He had always tried to put that event behind him, but even to that day, something about it still haunted him right to his very heart. Minara could relate, for she felt the same was since she had actually taken part in the ambush. Kiara noticed this nuzzled her mate for comfort, placing a paw on his back as he did so.

"Yeah, that was really necessary, Timon." Minara said annoyed. "All Pumbaa did there was let out a secret, he didn't try to kill anyone!"

Not that you're one to talk The meerkat thought.

Back in the fanfic, Pumbaa had no choice but to tell Ma, Uncle Max, and another meerkat named Pete about where Timon was now. And Ma wasn't exactly pleased about the answer.

"I sorta, kinda encouraged him to go alone," Pumbaa mumbled under his breath. Ma stepped onto Pumbaa's snout and looked straight at him.

"You... encouraged him?"

"Aww, c'mon, Mrs. Ma. She's part of another meerkat colony and Timon couldn't get her out of his head. I encouraged him to go so he wouldn't act mopey around here again. I was expecting him back by now, but then Zazu said he'd be staying longer."

Ma got off Pumbaa's snout and started pacing. "He's staying longer? He just got back and he's staying over there longer?! What's he doing over there?!"

"If he's staying longer, maybe he's making good progress with this girl," Pete said, tapping his chin.

"Oh-ho, no. He's not making any kind of progress unless I personally approve of her!"

"And the third place for biggest bitch in Africa goes to..." Kopa started to say, but Timon cut him off.

"Hey, that's my mother you're talking about, kid!"

Kopa shrugged. "Exactly." He muttered.

"Yeah, that is kind of mean of her." Minara said. "If he's in love, she should accept Zuri whether she likes her or not! That's what I'd do if I ever had a son."

Timon suddenly gave her an odd look. "How the hell have you not gone through menopause yet?!" He whispered to himself, hoping to God that she didn't hear that.

Ma and Uncle Max decided to go to the Pride Lands so that they could personally confront Timon about this, riding on Pumbaa to get there. The next morning, Timon and Zuri were having their next secret meeting where he was telling her about how he raised Simba in the jungle. Suffice to say, she didn't buy into it so quickly.

"Tunnel klutz is pretty obvious," Zuri said with a giggle. Timon grimaced once again. She sat up and tried to wipe the smile off her face. "But the rest? You tell me your father was the legendary Fearless Buzz, you tell me you found this gorgeous oasis you and your colony live in with no predators, you tell me you raised a lion cub who's now the 'king,' you tell me you fought off a pack of hyenas at the battle of Pride Rock, and you tell me you babysat the lion princess! What's to believe?"

"I also have a warthog for a friend," Timon mumbled. Zuri let out a few more giggles. "You don't believe that either?"

"Oh, sure. I have a warthog for a friend, too," Zuri grinned, not really sounding conviencing.

"You know, when you put it all like this," Simba began. "It does seem a little far fetched to believe everything you've done."

His old friend sighed and replied softly, "If it wasn't true, every single one of us would probably be dead right now."

The two meerkats continued to converse until Ma, Uncle Max and Pumbaa arrived rather abruptly and confronted them both, much to Timon's distress. Zuri and Ma had an awkward conversation for a while, and then Timon asked Ma this:

"Didn't Dad do anything like this for you?" Timon asked.

"No. Your father and I didn't live on different sides of the desert."

"Nothing that could get him and/or you in trouble at all?"

Ma thought for a moment, and then grinned, "Well..."

"Don't tell us!" Simba suddenly blurted out in a desperate tone. "I don't want to know where this is going, Timon! Whatever she says, just skip it! No one here needs to know about her insane sex life like that!"

An awkward silence fell upon the den all of a sudden, and Simba was met with some disturbed and embarrassed looks, especially from Timon.

"Uhh... I cut her off right there, Simba. She didn't say a thing!"

Simba's eyes widened, and then he placed his paw behind his head, rubbing the back of his mane in embarrassment.

"Sorry. I uh... I'm still a little, eh- paranoid about the smut that's out there."

"Welcome to my world." Kopa muttered.

Zuri had been given confirmation that the oasis did in fact exist, but she was still skeptical. But before anything else could happen, her father came up to them. And the situation went almost entirely downhill from there.

"Wait a second here..." Pumbaa said, looking at the group. "Mrs. Ma, Uncle Max, you know this guy?"

"His colony once tried to take over our colony," Uncle Max said.

"What?!" Timon asked. Shomari reached over, grabbed Zuri by the arm, and separated her from the group.

"Keep your boy away from my daughter. She's already been promised to someone and I intend to keep it that way," Shomari said.

"Hey, you know what?" Simba interrupted. "This sounds almost exactly like how it was between us and the Outsiders back when Kiara was still a cub."

Kiara nodded in agreement. "And this sounds just like the day I first met Kovu, too."

Kovu added, "Yeah, just without the alligators trying to kill us and the psychotic mother taking me away right after."

Timon mumbled, "Trust me kid, with my mother, that's not too far off."

So it turned out that Timon's colony and Zuri's colony had been longtime enemies with one another, and here Zuri finally snapped and demanded that her father give her the life she'd always wanted. But suffice to say, it did nothing. Once Shaomari took Zuri away and Timon was in denial that he was in love with her, Ma, Pumbaa and Uncle Max surprisingly became sympathetic for Zuri and wished that there was some way to help her out.

That night, Timon looked up to the stars and tried as best as he could to try and come up with a solution. It was clear that he was firmly in love with her at this point. Here, all seven of the listeners began to feel true emotion towards what was happening, and they now really did want to see Timon succeed in this.

Meanwhile Zuri was in deep thought about Timon as well, while her fiance tried to help her forget about him.

"You're not thinking of that rogue, are you?" Makali asked.

"Timon? I'm trying not to," Zuri said, her head bowed down.

"You can't believe everything he says. How do you know he actually has such a paradise home?"

"It was just something in his eyes... that made me want to believe him."

"You're so desperate for a better life, you'd believe anything. Your problem, Zuri, is you're too trusting." Makali walked ahead of her. Zuri grimaced and slowly followed. She took another look at Pride Rock.

"Geeze, this guy's such a douche!" Kovu said suddenly.

"I wasn't even this bad when I was the enemy!" Minara added. "At least I would've shown some kind of empathy for her!... not that I would've had anything to do with a meerkat at the time, but still!"

"He's just like Cal Hockley." Timon mumbled. But despite what he would've wanted, Nala overheard his comment. "Who?" She asked with confusion. "Who's that?"

Timon simply shook his head. "Let's just say I know a movie where there's this guy who's just as much of an ass as Makali here is. Hell, just make Makali a human and you've pretty much got him!"

Pumbaa then unwisely added, "He's from a movie that lasts so long, it'd put you to sleep, Nala."

Timon snickered. "You mean like Lord of the Rings which is exactly the same length as it?"

Pumbaa grimaced. "Shut up." He muttered.

Back in the fanfic, Kiara came up to Timon and tried to verbally support him, suggesting that he do the same thing that she and Kovu did: Make the two families one. At first he doubted that would ever work, but he thought about it some more, and eventually decided to get Pumbaa's help to follow Kiara's advice.

"Talk about Deja Vu here." Kovu muttered.

Meanwhile Zuri was able to stand up to Makali about Timon, saying how she doesn't want to marry him and how Timon actually cares for her and all.

Then she walked away through the tunnels where she met up with Timon once more, and he told her of his plan. Here is where Zuri revealed that she was going to have to marry Makali in three days time. Timon reassured her.

"Now try your best in coming back before the full moon, OK?"

"I doubt it's gonna take that long. Sit tight." Timon began to stand, but Zuri reached up and grabbed onto his arm. He settled back down, waiting to hear what she had to say. He took a moment to feel her fur. "Wow, you do have soft fur." He noticed she blushed slightly, and then he nervously grinned. "Did I just say that out loud?"

"Whoa, keep it at first base, guys!" Simba taunted.

"And let the fan art begin!" Vitani said sarcastically, not doubting for a moment that there was at least one piece of artwork depicting them going all the way.

Timon thought to himself, Yeah, replace 'Zuri' with 'Pumbaa' there, and you've got your wish, sister.

In the story, Timon went off with a promise to Zuri that he'd unite the colonies. He ran off to the oasis where his own colony resided and gathered them all up for a meeting on the situation. But upon discovering that Zuri was Shomari's daughter, things looked as though they were going to fall apart.

OK, we'll vote. All those in favor of going to the Pride Lands to meet with Shomari, say 'aye.'"

"Aye!" Pumbaa cheered out, then he ducked down when he received a few dirty stares from the colony.

"All oppose?"

"Nay!" the rest of the meerkats called out.

"There you have it, Timon," Pete said, turning his eyes to Timon.

"Yeah, thanks a lot, assholes!" the real Timon called out. "I save you all from having to live in fear and this is what I get?"

Kiara commented, "Okay, I know they tried to take your colony over and all... but what in the hell did they do to make them that prejudiced?"

Kopa replied to his sister, "At least with the Outsiders Simba had a reason to stay like that most of his life!" referring to himself. Then unexpectedly, Minara added,

"And it can't be like they all got together and tried to kill their own freaking son or anything!"

Minara suddenly gasped and gave Simba a blank stare, realizing the irony in what she had just said. "Uh, no offense, Simba."

The king nodded. "None taken." He and Kopa said in unison.

In the fanfic, Timon and Pumbaa decided that they would have to go back to the Pride Lands and think of another way, seeing as how his colony was going to be of no help.

"Wow... this is getting pretty emotional now, actually." Vitani said to herself. Kopa placed a paw on her shoulder.

"Yeah... I'm not gonna lie, this is... unexpected."

As if that weren't enough, Zuri caught Makali talking to her father, and in a twisted turn of events, the wedding was being moved up to that night without Timon knowing. Several of the listeners gasped when it was read off.

"Oh, I see. Uh... why so soon?"

"Being wed under a full moon... too traditional. You wanted me to stop being so traditional, didn't you, sweetie?" Shomari asked, cocking a brow.

"Ohh, irony bites them in the ass." Minara said.

"Crap, this is getting rough." Kovu said sincerely. "What's next, Makali's gonna try and go all the way with her right before the wedding?"

Nala snickered. "That'd still be better than how Simba and I approached it."

Kopa laughed at his mother's words for a moment. Indeed, he knew for certain now that his parents were not afraid to make fun of themselves every once in a while.

Horrified by this revelation, Zuri sprinted forth to Pride Rock and tried to tell the lions there what her situation was. But unfortunately she passed out from the sight of such mighty creatures around her, and it wasn't until she woke up that she managed to get anything through to them.

Zuri opened an eye to look at Simba. "The king?"

"Yes."

"... Did Timon really raise you from a cub with his warthog friend?"

"Yes, he did."

"What?! He told the truth about that, too?! Unbelievable!" Zuri stood and put a paw on her hip, now more annoyed than she was scared. "I've never known a man to tell the truth so much. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not."

"Why would that be a bad thing?" Minara asked curiously. Kovu snickered at his old pride member and replied to her, "Trust me Minara, if we had to tell the truth about everything we did, embarrassment would kill us all."

"You don't have to tell us twice." Muttered Kopa.

Eventually Simba and the others decided to help Zuri out, much to everyone's relief. Simba ordered Zazu to inform Timon and the colony about the wedding being moved up, and then Zuri had to return to her father so that no one would get suspicious. Meanwhile when Timon and Pumbaa had been informed of the new plans, they rushed back to the Pride Lands with the only idea they had left: for Timon to prove his worth to her father.

At that same moment in time when the sun began to set, Zuri was with her mother so she could talk to her daughter on the matter.

You know, sweetie, you could make an effort to look happy. You're getting married," she said.

"To a guy I don't really like," Zuri mumbled.

"Makali's a very handsome meerkat. Would you rather marry one of the uglier meerkats in this colony?"

"Well, no, but-"

"You know your father and I aren't getting any younger, Zuri. We want grandchildren."

"Oh yeah, because that's why every parent wants their kids to get hitched." the real Timon said sarcastically, pausing for another moment. "That's just sick right there, lady!"

Kiara leaned into Kovu and whispered into his ear, "Not as sick as what we're going to show him after this."

Dalila chuckled as she licked a paw and smoothed her daughter's hair out. "Even so, your father wants Makali. Couldn't you marry him for our sake and have a headache for the next five years?"

After everyone finished laughing hysterically at this, Pumbaa suddenly asked, "Is that a Spaceballs reference?"

Kopa gave him a confused look for a moment. "What's that?"

Following a moment of awkward silence, the warthog answered, "It's a movie made by the humans."

"How many movies have you guys even seen?" Kiara suddenly cut in. "Is that what you both did before you found the laptop? You seem to know a lot about them."

Timon reluctantly replied, "Ehh... let's just say we get around, Kiara."

In his mind he thought, What? You didn't think that theatre we watched your movie in was just for that one, did you?

Back to the fanfic, Zuri's mother left her a lone for a while to let her daughter think. She contemplated just about everything everyone said to her on the matter, and ultimately she made her decision. She ran away from the tunnels and set out to find Timon and prove his worth to her father.

I can relate, Kiara thought while chuckling about it, remembering how she had done a similar thing when she set off to find Kovu quite some time ago.

At the central meeting tunnel where the wedding was to be held, Timon was thrown in by two of the sentry guards, much to everyone else's shock. He finally stood up to Shomari face-to-face, saying that he would rather die than let Zuri continue living her horrible life with them.

"Wow, that's some heavy stuff, Timon." Kovu said smiling. "I'm impressed."

"Do you think you'd ever be able to do this in real life?" Kopa suddenly asked him. Timon sighed.

"Well, if I've made it this far with the crap the Internet can do, really, this isn't much of a stretch."

"Keyword being much." Vitani sneered.

Then just before things could get physical through all the surprisingly strong words, Zuri's mother, Dalila, came in saying she couldn't find her anywhere. And all of a sudden Pumbaa came in with horrifying news.

"Wow, that must be one big-ass tunnel if Pumbaa could get in with no problem." Simba sneered.

But his playful mood shattered in an instant when the warthog informed them that, based on tracks on the ground he'd seen, she had encountered hyenas.

"Aw crap, not these guys again!" Nala said loudly. "Pretty late in the story to bring them in, huh?"

"Hyenas?!" Dalila clutched onto Shomari. "I'm gonna lose my baby, Shomari!"

"I'm sorry, Dalila," Shomari said in a low voice as he held her close.

"That's it? You're just gonna let her get eaten?" Timon asked them both.

"It's the laws of nature. If you're at the bottom of the food chain and go outside alone at night, you're likely gonna run into trouble. Nothing we can do against hyenas."

"Oh now they're just not even trying anymore!" Kiara said.

"Screw it, I take back what I said about my own colony." Timon started. "At least they'd have the decency to take five seconds to look for me!"

"Six if you're lucky." Kovu mumbled to himself.

When they refused to look for her, Makali included, Timon could take it no more, and he punched him right in the face.

"No one calls my father an idiot except my mother."

Story of my life the real meerkat thought.

Timon and Pumbaa gave up on the colony and chose to look for Zuri themselves. They followed the tracks belonging to her and the hyenas, and Timon suggested that Pumbaa get help from Simba and the others. Pumbaa went off for Pride Rock while he went to look for the love of his life on his own.

"Wow, you would really do that, Timon?" Vitani asked, sounding genuinely impressed. Timon glanced over at her.

"Well given the circumstances... I guess I would. Even if I'd probably have my legs dripping wet right then, though."

"Gee, I wonder why." Kovu said flatly, clearly having heard more than he would've wished on that.

In the fanfic, the climax was being set up. Timon found the hyena with Zuri, and unexpectedly he bit into its leg to get it away from her.

"Geeze, can you imagine the aftertaste that'd leave?" Vitani commented. "Who the hell knows where that's been?"

The two of them ran, but then it turned out that the hyena there was a part of the very pack that had killed Timon's father. Interest and suspense levels soared for all of them, Timon himself included even though he knew how this would end.

The rest of the hyena's pack arrived while the meerkat tried to stall for time as long as he could.

"Oh for Christ's sakes, he's not going to propose to him, is he?" Kovu said, rubbing his eyes with his paw.

And thankfully he didn't. Eventually they had little choice but to run as fast as they could from the pack of hyenas. While they ran, Zuri told Timon why she ran away from her tunnels in the first place: to go back to Pride Rock and ask for directions to the oasis. Timon was flattered that she had finally disobeyed her father just for his sake.

"Yeah, you jump I jump, remember Jack?" Timon mumbled to himself in a taunting voice.

Then Timon helped Zuri get down to one of the tunnels for safety. But before he could get in too, the hyenas blocked his way, forcing him to run forth. And then this went down between Zuri and her parents:

"He's not a member of our colony, so he doesn't count. So why don't you-?" He was interrupted by a strong slap on the cheek. He was in shock, only dumbly putting a paw on his red cheek as his daughter Zuri waved her paw in the air. The rest of the colony stood there, stunned.

"Ow, that hurt," Zuri mumbled to herself, kissing her paw.

Shomari seemed to regain his senses, because his face grew angry. "Young lady, how dare you-?"

"No, Shomari! How dare YOU?! If you even cared about me, you would've been outside looking for me like Timon! Don't I have a right to slap you for being a poor father?"

"YOU'RE the one who left the tunnels when I told you not to! Before that rogue you didn't have any problem obeying me! I thought it might teach you a lesson!"

"At least if I was eaten, it would've been better than being forced to marry someone I DON'T love!"

Every single listener instantly cheered when they heard this, with Pumbaa whistling and all of the others shouting almost victoriously.

"Yeah! Finally she stands up to that ass face!" Kopa sneered loudly through the cheers.

"About freaking time, too!" Simba added. "He's deserved it from minute one!"

"Give 'em hell, Zuri!" Kiara cheered.

Once the suddenly tense excitement calmed down, Timon could go onwards. In the fanfic, he was still being chased by the hyenas in an attempt to keep them away from the tunnels. He tried to make for the dam that had once collapsed by the gorge, but found it had not been rebuilt yet. He was trapped with the canyon against his back and the hyenas approaching from in front. With little other choice, Timon did the most unforeseen thing imaginable: He jumped over the edge.

"What the f-!" Kovu was about to shout before Timon immediately went forth to cut him off.

"What?!" Mataka growled and peered down into the canyon, expecting to see Timon disappear into the darkness. Instead he saw Timon clinging to a thick root at the edge of the wall. Mataka grinned, "Out of the frying pan and into the fire. Someone go get him!"

"Oh thank God." Simba sighed in relief.

"Ha! Hobbit reference!... I think." Pumbaa said.

Thankful that he was alive still, they listened still. And here, the final climax could take place.

As if on cue, the hyenas started yelping out some pain as several meerkats launched themselves onto the hyenas biting and clawing them.

"Ow! Get 'em off!" a hyena yelped, trying to turn his head to nip at the meerkats.

"No, YOU get 'em off!" a second hyena growled.

"Wow, it worked," Timon blinked. He forced what little strength he had left in his arms to climb to the base of the root. He panted, and then swallowed. "Hey, can anyone up there help me back up?!" he called. To his surprise, Pete and Shomari both appeared above him. The two exchanged slightly dirty looks, and then nodded. Pete held onto Shomari's ankles as he lowered him down to Timon. Timon grabbed onto Shomari's paws as Pete pulled them back up.

"Hell yeah!" Kopa shouted, thrusting his one paw up past his head. "Now this is what I've been waiting to hear!"

"That old son of a bitch finally came around, huh?" Kovu mused. "Guess I take back what I said about him before, then."

Timon shook his head. "Oh don't worry, kid, I think you're still pretty justified."

Then abruptly, the lions from Pride Rock came in to fight off the hyenas, saving the meerkats who were being attacked. He got Shomari into the tunnel, but the hyena once again blocked his way. Then in another desperate move, he kicked dirt up into his face, this time not striking a rock with his foot. He ran as fast as he could with the hyena hot on his tail, and in the climactic move, he went forth to devour Timon when the meerkat leapt out of the way, revealing he was standing just by the canyon's edge leaving the hyena to tumble forth into the abyss.

"Now there's a slobbering, mangy, stupid poacher for you!" Simba cut in, making Nala laugh in remembrance of those words.

Timon went back down to the tunnels to meet with Zuri again until her father once again told him to leave.

"See? Told you you were still justified." Timon spoke to Kovu.

But then something none of them could've seen coming happened: Zuri began to side with her father this time, saying that her relationship with Timon was causing too much trouble between the two colonies. She said that if their families couldn't put their differences aside even after all that, then they shouldn't be together.

"Aw, what?!" Kiara suddenly snapped. "They're really going for this?"

"I swear to God, if this ends like that..." Minara began to say, but ultimately decided against finishing it.

Timon had returned to the oasis in an incredibly depressed mood, having said his good-byes to Zuri. An at the mention of all this, nearly all of the listeners were on the verge of tears.

"No! It can't end like that!" Nala said desperately. "What the hell kind of closure is this?"

"This is Lion of the Rings all over again!" Kopa protested. "What is it with having such depressing endings for all of these?"

Timon turned around and shook his head. "Hold up guys, don't start the sob fests yet. There's still two more chapters to go here."

Without waiting to hear any more responses, Timon went forth as best as he could. A week passed, and he was growing more and more depressed each day, which did nothing to help the listeners' concerns for him. Everyone close to him tried to cheer him up as best as they could, but it did nothing. These were by far the most depressing parts of the story for them all, for they felt absolute pity for the meerkat. Nala in particular was on the verge of tears having to hear this. None of them said a word.

But then Simba came to the oasis once again. And he most certainly wasn't alone.

"We have company!"

Timon laid back on his back and closed his eyes. "Yeah, I know, but I'm not in the mood to see Simba right now!"

"It's not Simba I want you to see!"

Timon's ears twitched slightly when he heard a voice sat up when he recognized it. "Zuri?" He grabbed a vine and climbed down. He ran past his mother towards the stream. When he arrived he noticed the colony dancing along to the beat the voice was singing. Simba was lying nearby, bobbing his head to the rhythm. Timon pushed his way through until he saw the meerkat singing did a small dance and continued. She suddenly stopped when she noticed Timon. Everyone turned to see what she was staring at.

"Finally showed up, eh, Timon?" a meerkat asked.

Timon ignored the meerkat as he walked up closer to the singing meerkat. "Zuri?"

"Hey, Timon." Zuri cowered her head a bit and looked away from him. "I guess I hitch-hiked to the right oasis. It's beautiful." Simba and the colony decided to part, to let the two talk.

At the mention of this, never before had any of the listeners cheered so loudly before up until then. They all screamed in happiness again, threw their paws up into the air and shouted out playful comments at the situation, for at last things were finally looking up for Timon in the story after so much harshness and pain.

"I wanted to tell you personally that Zuri is still unavailable. I have chosen a new fiancé for her."

Zuri walked up next to Timon. "Oh, Papa, after all this, I'm still in an arranged marriage?"

"Really, Shomari, when are you doing to get with the times?" Ma demanded, stepping up to him.

"You keep out of this," Shomari growled. Ma returned the growl and stood behind Timon.

"Please tell me it's not one of the uglier meerkats in the colony!" Zuri pulled on her ears. "Those guys are real nerds!"

"Well, he's not the handsomest meerkat in Africa-"

"I'd rather marry Makali in that case," Zuri said, folding her arms in front of her chest.

"I probably would, too," Timon muttered. Zuri laughed, but stopped when Shomari gave them both a warning stare.

"Let me finish. He's not the handsomest meerkat in Africa, but he is brave and worthy of my daughter."

Zuri sighed, now looking a little defeated. "Who?" Shomari arched a brow at Ma, who nodded to him. They both took hold of their children's shoulders, and turned them to face each other. They looked at each other, a bit confused.

"Holy crap, is this for real?" Minara asked eagerly. Timon nodded, which prompted the lioness to shout in absolute bliss.

"Yes! Yes, I knew it! I just knew it!" She shouted. "Praise the Lord, Timon and Zuri are finally going to be together!"

Kopa laughed before he added, "And hopefully not die a virgin. Hell, now he deserves it twice as much after all of that!"

The meerkat gave the prince an odd look that made it clear he was pretty disturbed by that. He said awkwardly, "Once again, I'm going to take that as a compliment... I hope."

And in fact, Minara's prediction was proven accurate. Zuri's colony had been planning this for a week, hence why it took them so long. A celebration was held there at the oasis, and the two colonies had become one. But even though Ma and Shomari were still upset that they had disobeyed them, they had given them a very creative and desirable way to make up for it:

Grandchildren.

"Ha! I was right!" Kopa shouted.

Following the little piece of banter that ensued, this went down out of nowhere:

Pumbaa sighed as he watched Timon and Zuri. "Gee, I'm the only bachelor left in the original Hakuna Matata group. I'm never gonna find a girl." He suddenly stood to attention as a female warthog padded by him, and winked at him. He watched her walk by, and grinned. "Then again..." He got up and trotted after her.

Timon blinked as Pumbaa followed the female warthog, and then he looked at Zuri. "You really do have a warthog for a friend?"

"Yeah, that's Jina. Quite a coincidence, huh? Two meerkats have warthogs for friends?"

"Nah... I'd say fate."

"Lucky son of a bitch!" Kovu said enthusiastically. "Nice going, Pumbaa!"

The warthog blushed and simply looked away. "Ah, I wish."

"So they randomly just decide to give Pumbaa a girlfriend too?" Simba questioned. When he did, Nala rested her head against his mane once more. "Don't ruin the moment, Simba." She said.

Another piece of romantic banter between Timon and Zuri went down before the two lovers went off into the jungle for time alone. Here someone would've normally made a joke about what it was they were going to do, but at this point nobody wanted to ruin the mood.

In the long run, Timon and Zuri had been married, as were Pumbaa and Jina. Pumbaa revealed to his friend that Jina was pregnant and that he was going to be a father before him, where Timon was happy for his friend, though a bit surprised that it was going to happen before him. And in the end, Zuri came up to Timon and informed him that she was expecting as well, and that the pups would be born in time for spring.

"Didn't your father teach you anything?" Zuri turned back to face Timon.

"Not about father issues. He died when I was barely six months old, before I even started babysitting. Uncle Max tried to teach me, but... he didn't make much sense. I kinda dazed off thinking about lunch when he was talking about the birds and the bees, especially the bees part." Timon rested his chin in his paw. "I can just hear him now. 'I give your pups two weeks to live under your care, Timon.' How am I gonna know how to raise my own kids?"

"Instinct. And don't forget, you're not the only one who's gonna take care of them," Zuri said, poking Timon in the chest. "Unlike you, I actually listened to what my mother taught me about being a parent."

Timon nervously chuckled as he dusted his chest off. "I'm glad at least one of us knows what they're doing." Zuri giggled and then leaned her weight against him. "Any idea how many are in there?"

"Not a clue, but the first litters are usually small."

"We'll think of names later then, maybe in another month or two?"

"We'll see."

"So... spring, huh?"

"Mmm-hmm."

"I hope they don't come on the first day of spring."

"Why not?"

"Because that's MY birthday."

And at long last, Timon collapsed onto the ground in front of the computer, exhausted and out of breath from all of that reading. He took a few moments to himself as he lay there on the ground taking deep breaths, barely able to maintain his train of thought anymore. Eventually he stood up, dusted himself off, and turned around to see everyone's reactions. And the looks on their faces said it all. Nearly all of them were choked up with satisfaction at the whole thing. Nala was sobbing happily into Simba's mane while clutching onto his body with her two upper paws. Kiara's eyes were blinded with tears as Kovu rested his head upon hers, and Vitani and Kopa were both futily trying top hold back their sobs too. Timon smiled. This time, he didn't even have to ask what they thought, for they began to answer before he could ask.

"That was so beautiful." Nala said in between sobs. "I'm... s-so happy that all worked out so well!"

Simba nodded beside her. "Okay, that was definitely one of the best I've heard so far, Timon."

Kiara spoke her opinion next. "That was the best I've heard! My God, that ending was so adorable, everything felt so natural!"

Kovu seemed to agree. "It was awesome, Timon. Th-thanks so much for reading that to us!"

Minara then said, "I loved it! I mean damn, if this is what you've been listening to this whole time, sign me up!"

Kopa nodded as he nuzzled Vitani for comfort. "Absolutely incredible. It felt so real, you know? It felt like I was almost really there and that this could really happen."

Vitani took a deep breath before she replied, "Same here, Kopa. Personally, I'm really glad that they didn't make Timon and Pumbaa gay here. I mean, how easy would that have been to do?"

Pumbaa said back to her, "A lot easier than you might think, unfortunately."

Timon sighed in happiness. The story had been a complete success, so at the very least it made him feel that losing so much breath on it was worth it. He stretched himself out as he looked outside, seeing that the sun had set entirely now and that the stars were showing against the horizon.

"So I guess that wraps up today's fanfics, huh?"

Each of them nodded, agreeing that "Someone Like You" was the perfect place to end for the day. In fact, if the story had not been so emotional as it was, Kovu and Kiara would've pulled up the Timon/Shenzi material right then and there. But neither of them wanted to spoil the mood right then, so they both felt that they could at least wait just one last day to go for it.

A few moments passed as everyone took their time to recover from such an emotional roller coaster. Eventually Simba yawned while he said to them all,

"Well I think I'm done for today."

Nala seemed to agree, as did Kopa and Kiara. Kovu stood up and stretched himself out and Vitani did the same.

"I'm going to need some fresh air after that." Vitani said tiredly as she stood up, shaking her back paws to let the blood flow to them again. The lioness moved past Minara and started for the entrance to the den, feeling in the mood to be outside for air after that. Kovu looked up to her.

"Where are you going?"

"Just going out for a walk."

Kovu took a few steps over to her, stepping carefully over the laptop. "Would... would you mind if I came with you?"

Vitani raised an eyebrow at her brother's request, but then he clarified. "I think I need some air too. I'm getting tired of just sitting around in this place all day."

Not that the humans mind it, Timon thought to himself.

Following a moment of silence, her expression lightened and she nodded. "I guess so. Sure, come on." She said.

Kovu came up to his sister's side and looked outside with her. Both the lion and the lioness looked behind them to their mates, where Kovu said, "W-we're just going out for a walk. We'll be back."

Kiara and Kopa nodded as they both stood up, stretching their weary bodies out from sitting down for so long. Kopa yawned.

"Just don't stay out too long." He said to Vitani, smirking romantically at her.

"We'll be back soon." Kovu replied, though he said it more to Kiara than he did to Kopa. He gave Kiara a warm smile and stared into her eyes for a moment before he turned away and stepped outside of the den with Vitani and took a deep breath of the fresh air once more. The two siblings treaded down the stony slope that led down to the ground, staring up to the sky that was mostly darkening blue, though with hints of cirrus-like pink out in the distance behind Pride Rock.

Although Vitani only intended this to be a short walk out in the savannah, Kovu did in fact have some things to say to her, hence why he tagged along.

That is, as long as she doesn't kill me with one of her mood swings first he thought to himself.

Author's Note: Story credit once again goes to the author Kari Gilmore with their fanfic "Someone Like You". I wish to deeply thank them for giving me permission to use their story here, and it has been an honor to revisit it. It truly is a wonderful story that has many emotional moments, and is a lot more than one might expect. I sincerely recommend checking it out in full, for it really is worth it.

In other news, the next two chapters will not be focusing on a fanfic. I am attempting to try something new here to avoid too much repetition, and before anyone gets concerned, there will be more fanfics covered afterword. But in the meantime, next they will be covering something much different. Something I've wanted to sink my teeth into since the very beginning of this whole story: Next, they will be watching Confused Matthew's review of the first Lion King film.

Boy, is that going to be a handful.