Once again I was back in an the orphanage. The face had a name, " Matvey, ve go play now da?" The child had said to me. His deep purple eyes wide and bright with happiness. I would just giggle and take his hand, " Yeah of course Ivan, let's go play". I wondered what happened to those eyes. The always so bright and happy ones. The dream went on as I played with this thought." Matvey vhen ve get older ve should be vone" Little Ivan had said to me as we reached the old playground. The swings where red with rust, and the slide had holes. It wasnt a very nice park but it was or whole world back then. " Yeah, of course Ivan" I told him. " Matvey ve may not be related, But you are like a brother da?" Ivan smiled. " W-wow, t-thanks I-Ivan... I a-am honored" I stuttered. I was always so nervous like that. Me and Ivan. We really where two peas in a pod. I was always ignored and not recognized. As if I was invisible. And Everyone had feared Ivan. Heck, I even feared Ivan. He always looked so big and powerful. But, now I know he is my Ivan. My sweet little Ivan of long ago.
Soon the dream changed it went to that night. That night that when that Russian militant came in. I remembered Ivan screaming ," MATVEY...MATVEY". That is when I woke up, " IVAN!" I screamed as I shot outta bed. Tears had streamed down my face. I heard someone run down the hall. My hands covered my face as I cried into them. Tears were streaming down my face. Why was I so upset?. The door had burst open, " Matvey, vhat is wrong?, vhy are you cryingk?" He asked worried. His accent was thicker then usual. " I-Ivan... I am s-so sorry..." I cried. " V-vhy are you appologizingk, you didn't do anythingk wrong" He said assuringly as he took a seat beside me. " I-Ivan I c-could have s-saved you from him... You cried for me and I w-was there frozen" I choked out. " Matvey, are you talkingk about that night at the orphanage?" He asked sadly. I nodded. That is when he wrapped his arms around me. " Matvey, vhy would I be angry?, You vere young and scared, just like I vas. If I vas you and saw you dragged avay I vould be scared too, Don't blame yourself for that" He smiled lightly.
I nodded as my arms slowly wrapped around him. I just felt safe... Like the old days. The days when I would wake from my nightmares and he would sit beside me and hold me tight as I cried. He had patted my head lightly and held me closer. " Matvey it is okay now, all of the badness is gone" He whispered. I looked up and he wiped my tears away. I felt a warm feeling in my heart. Not just from feeling safe. But from being loved. Sitting here with Ivan made me feel less and less forgotten. I didn't feel like an invisible being around him. I felt...normal. " Is my Matvey okay now?" He asked a hint of worry still in his voice. " Yeah, your Matvey is okay" I chuckled lightly. He hugged me tightly one more time and then let go. He stood up and turned to me. " My Matvey~" He said happily as he turned and walked out the door.
It felt cold here without him... Was I ...Falling for Ivan?
To be continue-