MAX'S POINT OF VIEW
I couldn't move my hands, or my feet. I was trapped! I could hear voices, distant and fuzzy.
"She's just a child! Mark, no. We can't give up, you can't-"
"You think I haven't thought of that? What other choice do we have? You think she's going to be happy? You think she'll be safe?"
"But..." Whoever was protesting began to cry. I heard the other person sigh.
"Let her go, Viv. Just let her go."
I gasped, sitting up in bed. My head was pounding, my body damp with sweat. My blanket was twisted around, making it difficult to move.
Just a nightmare. Forget about it.
I had the nightmare more than I'd care to admit. It was my parents' voices. At least, that's what I was guessing. I hardly remembered them, having been given up at three and a half. Anne told me once that they were caught in a bad situation and did it to protect me. I accepted it, not knowing what else to think. I missed them growing up, since Anne was hardly around and hardly a parent. Then my siblings came along, and I was determined to give them a better childhood then I had had. I did it too- they were happy, normal kids. I couldn't be more proud.
I yawned, stretching. It was Sunday, a day to recover from the long week. I padded quietly out of my room, not wanting to wake anyone. I went downstairs to find Anne reading the paper and eating a protein bar. She never cooked and only ate protein centered food. I wasn't an excellent cook, in fact, I was downright terrible at times, but hey! At least I tried.
"Hey Anne."
"Hey Max. I have work until seven tonight, okay?"
"Okay."
I started to make breakfast while Anne puttered about getting ready. She was a tall woman, slender with long blonde hair that was almost always in a tight ponytail. She had a stern looking face, like she was always in charge. Which, of course, she wasn't. Sometimes I wondered if she only adopted the others to pacify me. She did care for us, but she hardly showed it. The other kids and I were used to her distance, but sometimes I knew I could see the longing look in their eyes at they saw other moms dote on their kids. I felt bad, but filled the gaps the best I could.
I remembered Ella's words from the day before: you can fill the gaps in his heart.
I hardly thought I could help Fang-he didn't seem to need or want it. I knew he had needed me that night at the arena, and I'm glad I was there. But I wasn't sure he'd be willing to let me in and continue to help him. Then again, I had promised Ella. I knew I couldn't give up without trying. Plus, who knew? Maybe I just couldn't see how much Fang was in need of a friend.
These thoughts occupied me as I attempted to make oatmeal. It came out well enough, and I went to wake the kids for breakfast. Gazzy and Angel shared a room, and last night, shared a bed. Gazzy was curled up, one hand outstretched and holding Angel's, her posture matching his. I shook their shoulders lightly. Gazzy, the paranoid one, opened his eyes and shot up, looking around. Once he realized I had woken him and not the Apocalypse, he yawned and shook the and Angel's entwined hands.
"Ange. Hey Ange, wake up," he whispered. Angel stirred slightly before waking. She smiled hazily at Gazzy before looking at me and holding out her arms. I picked her up, carrying her out of the room before setting her down. She and Gazzy went downstairs while I woke Nudge.
Nudge was splayed out on her bed, snoring. I threw open her blinds, filling the room with bright morning light.
"Up and at em', Nudge!" I called to her. She rolled over, moaning. I left the room to let her wake herself. Once everyone was assembled and had eaten, I addressed them.
"So? What do we want to do today?" I asked.
"Jj wanted to meet up and see a movie and possibly go ice skating, okay? I don't know what movie, but I swear it wouldn't be R or anything. The skating rink is downtown, ya know? The one by the gas station with the dinosaur? Remember when we first go there and Angel pointed out the dinosaur and I said something about skating 'cuz I love it and I wanted to go and you said 'maybe another time'? That one."
Whelp, Nudge is awake. "Sure thing, hon. Just let me know when you're going and coming back so I can give you a ride."
"Okay! Thanks, Max!" Nudge said, excited. She ran up the stairs to get ready.
"What about you two?" I asked the twins, waiting patiently as they looked at each other a moment. Angel smiled and nodded, Gazzy shrugged.
"We wanna go swimming, Max." Gazzy told me, Angel giving her signature nod in approval. I wasn't surprised-they were like fish, both of them. I could hardly keep them away from it.
"Alright. Grab your suit and get ready. I'll go talk to Nudge." They grinned, running to their room to get ready. I went to Nudge's room where some candy pop song was blaring. I walked in to find her chatting on the phone. How can they even hear her..?
"Oh, I know! Yeah. So navy blue is out. How about coral? Oh...I didn't think about that. She would totally think I was copying her! Hmm..."
"Hey Nudge?"
"One sec. Yeah?"
"We're leaving soon."
"I'll catch a ride with Jj. You can pick me up at like five, okay? At the rink."
"Okay, cool."
I got the kids ready and piled them into my truck. We spent the day swimming, thought it nearly killed me. Gaz was totally concerned with splashing me and pulling off stunts he shouldnt have. He attempted to do flips off the diving boards multiple times, usually ending with a huge splash or huge belly flop. In the end, he did manage to pull it off, but not before he managed to pull of his trousers by accident.
Angel, on the other hand, decided she was a freaking fish. She went under for minutes at a time, holding her breath long enough to have the lifeguards after her twice. Twice, people. I made her promise to take regular breaths so an ambulance wouldn't get called. She obliged and we swam on until the kids were sufficently exhausted and bored. We picked up Nudge and even through her constant chattering, the twins managed to fall asleep in the back seat, their heads leaned against each other.
Hours and a few showers later, I sat in my bed knowing that these kids were my family. It wasn't easy and it sure as heck wasn't perfect, but I was lucky. I could call then mine and love them.
Which brought my mind back to Fang and Ella. They had no security, no guarantees. I wasn't sure how they faced every day with their unusually stoic faces. Maybe Fang did need someone. Someone who could help improve his situation, or at least, help him forget about, even if just for a moment.
And maybe, just maybe, that someone could be me.