XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Take 95: Alien influence

Category for this take: Romance

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"This is great."

"I told ya!"

"I can't believe we didn't do this years ago."

"Yes, well, let's not dwell."

"Didn't that tape say there were no fish in your pond?"

"Close enough."

XXXXX

"Could we go over the plan again, Sir?"

"Do we have to? I think this is all a waste of time. And considering what this plan is for, maybe you should call me Jack."

"Sorry, habit. The plan, Jack?"

"Fine. Next week, I transfer to DC. The week after, you transfer to Area 51. A week after that, I start my tour of the facilities under my command: the SGC, Antarctica, the Alpha, Beta, and Gamma Sites, the F304 construction depot, a couple of our larger off-world mining operations, and Area 51."

"Don't forget Eureka."

"There is no way I'm going to that place without you there backing me up. What I don't understand is why Area 51 has to be last."

"After Area 51, do you really want to have to visit the mining operation on P4X-802?"

"Good point. So assuming the inspections go off without a hitch, I should be at Area 51 in thirty-three days."

"Actually, I've figured out a schedule that should cut off five days. I involves gate trips directly between off world bases to avoid coming back to the SGC and undergoing physicals. Also, if you can get the Prometheus in orbit at the right time, you can save two travel days for Antarctica."

"I was planning on just flying an F302. I need to keep up my hours to keep my flight pay."

"I guess that is ok. It would still cut off a day and a half."

"You really want my trip over soon, don't you, Carter?"

"You have no idea. Well maybe you do."

"So while I'm gallivanting around the galaxy, you'll be whipping the egg heads into shape."

"You make it sound like I'm making an omelet. We're going to be integrating the final systems in the Daedelus. Then there's the backlog of close to two hundred artifacts that need to be studied. Also, I have two new naquada generator designs I've been wanting to test. One is more portable for emergency gate dialing. In a few years, I hope to have a pocket version. The other design is industrial strength for long term use after we relocate a large village. Those are going to be needed for some of the relocations of human slave populations away from the Jaffa."

"Sounds like you really don't need me at Area 51, Carter."

"Don't even kid about that, Jack. I work better on a deadline. Since I'm going to be 'the man', I'm going to be able to delegate most of the grunt work, like the generator construction. We're never going to catch up on the artifact backlog. I'm just going to prioritize the work for the rest of the staff. Of course you know one of the artifacts that I'm going to be working on personally when you come for your inspection."

"You mean the sex machine?"

"It's not a 'sex machine'."

"That's what everyone is calling it after 'The Incident."

"You mean when Felger and Chloe-"

"Ah, ah. We do not describe the incident. That's why it is referred to as 'The Incident'. Do we really have to use it?"

"We're not going to actually use it. It's a cover."

"I never understood this part of the plan. We have been given permission."

"What they said was they would have no problem with the two of us specifically as a couple. We've more than proven ourselves. However, they do not want to set a precedent."

"We're getting married, Sam. Married couples are allowed to serve together."

"Technically, I'll still be in your chain of command right before we get married. They just need an excuse, Jack."

"So we are really going with the 'alien influence' excuse? You think they'll buy that?"

"Everyone will know what we are really doing. The plan gives them plausible deniability. Like when the Asgard stepped in to change the color of the sun on K'Tau. Also, Walter told me the CSAF added money to the pool under the 'alien influence' category last week. Considering he knows you are transferring to DC, away from alien influences..."

"It was a signal. It's a good thing I decided to let Walter keep the pool open."

"It has been useful since you got him to agree to pass inside information to us."

"Ok. So you are checking the sex machine out of lockup on the day I go to Area 51 for the inspection. We pretend it was activated, jump in a car, get married in Vegas, and spend the next several days of leave in a hotel room."

"And we live happily ever after. Yes, that's the plan."

"I guess we have had a few more complicated plans than that, Sam. My question is what is plan B?"

"I haven't gotten that far. You're right, though. Most of the time, we've needed a plan B."

"How about I find the nearest flat surface and throw you down on it?"

"As much as I love that idea, especially right now when faced with the prospect of waiting four weeks, how do we justify it?

"We could claim PTSD. Or better yet, we could claim to be alternate Jack and alternate Sam, from a universe identical to this one is all respects except for the frat regs. You were conducting an experiment in the alternate universe that swapped us."

"Let's try plan A first. If that doesn't work, we'll go with your alternate universe plan, Jack."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: If you like the Eureka reference, read the hilarious "Road Trip" by NotJana. It's a post-Continuum SG-1/pre-time travel Eureka crossover. You don't have to be a big Eureka follower to enjoy it.