Title: An Interpreter Would Be of Some Use

Characters: Captain Jack Harkness, Ianto Jones, Owen Harper, Toshiko Sato, and Gwen Cooper.

Rating: PG

Author's note: Set during season two, but before Reset, written for a French challenge, the prompt being: miscommunication. This is the sequel of Let's Have Some Fun.

Disclaimer: Still not making money out of this. Characters are still belonging to RTD and the BBC.

Beta:

...

"dgeJgurYp yhhOoptep utéo !"

"Okay, I'll tell her," Jack replied.

Three weeks after the Home Showroom expedition, the five nice Fengeldubbitomîode'n were still welcome guests at the Hub and no one was complaining about it.

It was, in fact, impossible to send them home as their spaceship had been crushed by the rift. It was disguised as an old corvette, which a slight miscalculation in course-plotting had sent right into the rift instead of just surfing along its edge to gain velocity. They had been lucky to get out alive of course, but now they were stranded so very far from their original temporal-spatial destination.

The whole team had worked together to build a large pool in an empty storage room of the third underground, just to greet the lovely Water Flowers. Funny thing; no one complained about the extra graft, not even Owen.

In fact for once everyone was okay with Jack's mania for taking care of the harmless lost travellers, not that the rest of the team was usually less sensitive than their leader, but Jack's definition of harmless could sometimes be hazardous.

Of course, the Fengeldubbitomîode'n couldn't settle indefinitely in the Hub, they need a nice place where they could have a life of their own without interfering too much with Humans.

"Gwen, gYuo is okay to spend the weekend with you and Rhys. As for me; I won't play home interpreter, so you better fend on your own," Jack told Gwen.

"dirEpzjgOru jfyruHnvc iyuYsk Juy ?" oYoip asked.

"We're working on it. At least when we manage to get the time," Jack replied.

"irpsHrtu iu oWn zorpFhr !"

"Yeah, I noticed that, too," Jack replied with a wide grin. "And that could explain a lot."

"What's going on?" Tosh asked from her station.

"oYoip is saying that we all seem to really enjoy their company."

"Of course we enjoy their company, they're not fucking sods like most of humanity!" Owen spat with a disconcerting enthusiasm that was normally beyond him.

"Zorpfhr opj jfyruhnvc, Jak!"

"Yes, you're right. Perhaps, it wasn't such a good idea in the first place," Jack replied.

"What's the problem?" Owen asked anxiously.

"We were wondering about entrusting someone else with their evacuation to Bermuda ..."

"How that? It is a medical convoy. This is my responsibility, right? I'm still the doctor here, if you haven't forgotten."

"Own tYop direpZjgoru!"

"She said you have a thing for tYop!" Jack teased him with an amused smile.

"That's cobblers! Bullock, even! I don't have any preference of any kind, you can tell them..."

"lgjpozytrp utr,vjh he oWn tuyrhfi !"

"No, he still didn't get that part," Jack chuckled.

"What? What I didn't get?"

"The part where it's not because we don't understand them that they don't understand us," Ianto explained, arriving with a fresh turn of coffee.

Jack sent him a smile from ear to ear.

"At least, we've got someone here still able to use his brain," he commented.

"What 's that supposed to mean?" Owen and Gwen asked as one, while Tosh was wondering if she should feel offended or not.

"Because you're going to say you aren't spending your nights down there, perhaps?" Gwen said.

"Are you planning on doing Jack a scene?" Ianto asked mockingly.

"And I thought I was a pervert," Owen cut in. "If you think we don't know what you two get up to with these marvellous creatures as soon as we leave the Hub, you're wrong."

"qjfHg oejfYe oWn gEn ?"

Jack, almost as much as the lovely Fengeldubbitomîode'n, was clearly having the time of his life.

"What is this about?" Ianto asked, a bit contrite.

"What's happening?" Gwen asked, eyes widening.

"Can we know? Or is it private?" Owen joined in.

"Nope!" Jack finally managed to articulate.

"I think they're scoring a point ..." Tosh stated as she was getting won by the laughter.

It took the activity detector alarm going off to bring everyone back to the harsh reality of life as a Torchwood Cardiff employee.

"You three with me. Ianto, you're monitoring us from here," Jack said.

"Why always Ianto?" Owen protested.

"Because his brain doesn't melt at the mere sight of our lovely guests," Jack replied, pushing Owen toward the exit.

"You're pretty much the only one so far to have this effect on him..." Tosh said before she could stop herself, blushing from ear to ear as she realised what she had just said.

Everyone, beginning with Jack and Ianto, was staring at her in amazement.

"If even Tosh starts to lose it, I think it's more than time for me to take things in hand!" Ianto said.

Jack agreed with a grin before leaving.

"TO hreoiyrh jeiu?"

"Yep!" Ianto replied.

With his usual efficiency, Ianto managed to guide the team on their field mission, and at the same time, prepare the departure of their very nice residents. Obviously the harmless and lovely sentient sponge baths would need an interpreter to accompany them during the journey, and that person could only be Jack!

Pragmatic as he was, Ianto decided to put in for a week's vacation. After all, he and Jack were due, and there was every reason for it to go through, because he'd never taken any of his leave!

In fact, he quite fancied a short trip for two to Bermuda...

End