Two years and 5 days later...
The kids of the cul-de-sac were once again in the holiday spirit, Eddy hoping this would be the year he wouldn't get clothes, yet Christmas wasn't the same without the Kankers, the kids thinking this as the third time they wouldn't hear explosions coming from the trailer park and the re-enactment of Jesus' story leading to the smooching of the century for the three Eds.
Edd and his giant coat replaced by a coat that didn't make him look like an adult swim character from a show with a killer baby, while he was cleaning the snow off of his father's car, he is 14 years of age and now has dirty blond locks sticking out from under his hat, it seemed as if another year and that old beany woud be all worn out, yet he refused to remove his cap as his trademark was his hat, as he was just scratching snow off of the car's windows he heard a faint 'plup' behind him, he looked around and saw a small box with a navy blue bow, Edd picked the box up and saw that it was locked, he read the note tied to the ribbon
Dear Cuddlemuffin, You may recognise who this is from hence the nickname, we have changed since our last encounter with you, I'm pretty sure you know I love you now, Merry Kristmas Double D.
Love, well, you'll have to guess
P.S. I see you with but one eye, but am not a monster
Double D re-read the note several times, and said under his breath: "I get it." He retraced to the part where it was spelt "Merry Kristmas" Christmas is spelt with a C not a K, Merry Kristmas... M.K... Marie Kanker, "The key!" he said, and he searched his coat pocket for the key he had been holding in his other coat pocket 2 years ago, he found the key and took a good long look at it, the tooth... two teeth of it and the shaft made a K, he inserted the key into the lock and turned it, hearing the small *clunk* of the tumbler, and opening the box he could not believe what he saw... the same red lipstick despenser from the day he and his fellows tried reverse psychology on the Kankers, (for those who do not know it is called "A twist of Ed, Season 4 episode 12") suddenly he heard a soft 'beep beep, beep beep' coming from his watch, the time was 8:30.
"Oh dear I'm late!" He said, he dashed into the house, grabbed his back pack for one last day of school before the holidays, and dashed down the street for Peach Creek Junior High School, he couldn't tell his fellows because there was absolutely no talking in class at this age, but once lunch came-
"NACHOS!" Ed yelled and he stuffed his face full of cheesy cafeteria nachos.
"Where the hell is sockhead?" Asked Eddy.
Edd dashed into the lunchroom and sat down at Ed and Eddy's table, Eddy did not just have 3 simple hairs on his head anymore, he combed it out one day and saw that he was almost the same as Ed, only with spiky black hair, as for Ed, his mother didn't like his buzz cut so he used a broken tin can to comb out his hair and a full head of Auburn hair was revealed.
"Eddy," Edd began, "I'm not sure you would refer to this as 'good news' but the K-!"
The door to the lunchroom burst open and three once-evil figures appeared in the door, AKA The Kankers, the three of them just sat with their bowling, automechanic, and giant smudge lunchboxes.
Marie was now wearing a blue tank-top with the number 8 on it and baggy cargo pants with many pockets, she now had black hair and the locks of hair covering her right eye had been cut away, revealing both of her eyes.
May now wore a red long-sleeved shirt and pinkish pants, and her buck teeth was filed down to normal front teeth, she also had longer hair (Believe it or not).
Lee's hairdo was a swervy one at the front and a bit of a ponytail at the back, she now wore a white T-shirt with one big dot in the center, she now also wore baggy blue pants like Double D's.
Ed and Eddy had already hidden under the table and put a large white tablecloth under it, because of the dance on Christmas Eve (It's optional now, just a dance, no school) there were not enough tables so the only three remaining seats were the ones at the Eds' table.
Edd said, "Excuse me?" to the Kankers, "Would you like to join me and my fellows at this remaining table?"
"Thanks." Said the three kankers at the very same time, they all sat down at the Eds' table and Double D felt a tugging at his pant leg, he saw his fellow, Eddy's hand pulling on his pant leg.
"Pardon me for a moment," He began, "I'll be right back." He slipped under the table and saw Eddy, furious, saying "ARE YOU CRAZY SOCKHEAD?! YOU JUST LET THE FREAKING KANKERS INTO OUR TERRITORY!"
"Eddy don't you think the Kankers would've attacked RIGHT when they came into the cafeteria?" Edd asked.
"FINE! But show them what's under your hat first!"
"I'll do so as soon as we come to so! But first we have to converse with them and then we'll get to the hat sequence."
The Eds got out from under the table, believe it or not, Eddy was the conversation starter.
"So, How was Canada?" Asked Eddy.
"We got stuck in a robbery while we were grocery shopping." Said Lee.
"They tried to fool everyone with a BB gun that was spraypainted black like in Home Alone 3, but it didn't much fool anyone and the robber got run over by a-"
"Eddy got ran over by a reindeer!" Ed sang, "Walking home to his house Christmas Eve!"
"Does he always do that?" Asked Marie.
"You should see how he is around Halloween." Eddy said, "He hums the Halloween theme."
-Flashback-
Ed: *Hums Halloween theme for the 8th time*
Eddy: SHUT UP ED!
-End Flashback-
"WHY HAVE YOU RETURNED DEMONS OF THE STINKY TRAILER!?" Ed yelled.
"Ed! Manners!" Edd pulled Ed's ear.
"Owie!" Said Ed.
"Good, you've learned your lesson." Edd let go of Ed's ear.
"Our mother raised enough money to buy a house in Peach Creek." Said Lee, "We only left because Park n' Flush was being torn down."
"We knew that," Said the Ed's in unison, "Hey! Stop that!"
The Kankers giggled.
"Aren't you due for an attack right about... now?" Asked Eddy.
"Oh my God why haven't you figured it out yet, you had 2 years!" Yelled Lee.
"We're out of it!" Yelled May, "We aren't the crazed psychos that we used to be!"
"We also came back to Peach Creek for another reason," Marie began.
"Why?" Asked the Eds in unison again, "Cut it out!"
Marie stuck out her hand nearly curled into a claw, the Eds flinched, the hand reached out for Edd, he shut his eyes tight, and then, he felt the best feeling he ever felt, he opened his eyes and saw what Marie was doing, she was scratching up on top of his head and for some reason he had never been able to make it feel that good.
"How did you know?" Asked Edd, moaning with pleasure.
"Your personality is a stress signal, our mom had one, it's always a part of the body that was very itchy, you do not want to know where our mom's was."
"Agreed." Said Edd, randomly, he thought it was 'the time'.
"Excuse me?" He asked, "Would you like to know what is underneath my hat?"
"that is about an eighth of the reason why I fell in love with you!" Marie said eagerly.
"Ed?" Asked Edd, "The Border."
"Right!" Said Ed, and put a huge stone border around the table.
"Daaaaamn." Said Lee.
Edd carefully removed his hat like Henry Jones Jr. removing the idol from it's pedestal, and in a flash of light... they saw it!
"Oh my God!" Yelled Lee.
"It's like a big fuzzy rainbow!" Cried May.
"I don't see what's wrong with it." Marie said simply, but she was stopped dead when she noticed, it was the most amazing thing you could find on your head, it was all different colors in random places, and there were patches of it that made it look much longer, three hairs of dirty blond hair stuck out in front and back of his head, and there were a few patches of reddish in his hair along with some brown.
"I think you should let that hang out a bit instead of hiding it." Said Marie.
"You're right Marie." Edd replied, and patted out a bunch of his hair, it was even longer than MAY'S now!
"Hey, look, Repunzel's kid!" Eddy joked, Marie clouted him on the head, "Heeey? It was just a joke!"
Ed lifted the border as Edd put his hat back on, but still, the colorful hair hung out it was hard to believe that 2 years later it would STILL be a mystery what was under his hat, and Jonny was the one who was still trying to find out, so he walked up to Edd and said, "Hello Double D, is this the day you finally show what's under your hat?" Edd nodded, "Right on!" Cried Jonny.
Did we forget to describe Jonny? I'm sorry, he was wearing a green shirt that had a stripe going through the middle, he wore long baggy pants and red and white sneakers like Rolf's only smaller, he has a light brown afro.
Did we also forget to describe Edd? Oh my lord, and the other two Eds! Okay we'll describe them in order...
Ed had a large black jacket instead of his old green one which he kept in a time capsule for good memories, he also wore a light red shirt under his jacket, his pants were still baggy and dark blue, only instead of size 14's they were now size 16's, he wore blue and white Nike sneakers.
Edd had a sleeveless shirt that was dark red over a purple long-sleeved shirt, on the front of the sleeveless shirt it said 'Peach Creek Book Club official sleeveless shirt' in light blue Times New Roman font letters, and he wore long baggy green cargo pants, and he wore dark red sneakers with a white stripe and a Reebok logo on them.
Eddy wore an orange t-shirt with a red long-sleeved shirt underneath, he also wore purple baggy pants because it seemed like the trademark of the Eds to him to wear baggy pants, he wore brown slip-ons with no brand-name.
As the characters meet each other you will know them from time-to-time, now then, back to the story.
Edd then caught sight of the dance poster, "I think that we should take advantage of this truce, lords and ladies." he pointed towards the poster. "What do you think?"
Ed and Eddy started sweating, thinking 'Eddy: Oh my god we're actually going to dance with girls who love us. Ed: GOOD GRAVY! I NEED TO GET MAY A BOX OF CHOCOLATES! And I need to consult Sarah.'
"Agreed." Said Eddy and Ed.
"Yes." Said Marie.
"I'm gonna be with Ed!" Said May happily.
"Bring on the 70 pounds of MAN!" Lee yelled.
Marie just stared at Lee with a WTF? Expression on her face.
"Sorry," Lee began, "Not the most appropriate to say in a fanfiction written by a red-haired-."
"IT'S GINGER!" The creator cried.
"Ginger-haired boy." Lee corrected herself.
-MEANWHILE AT THE FOURTH WALL IN AFRICA-
"Hey, dis fort wall is awmost finiss'd from da last fort wall break!" Said a random guy who built the fourth wall, suddenly, the wall broke and squished the random guy, "Ah, we shuda made it outta steel!" Suddenly the creator of the fanfic came in his gicantic form and said to the random guy, "What the heck are you doing in my fanfiction?"
"Stup you are breakin' it moar!" The creator picked up the random guy and put him in a cardboard box with very tiny holes.
"And why the heck is this guy dressed up like he was 13th century?!" Yelled the creator.
"Iss juss for effect!" Yelled the random guy muffled up.
"I'm sending you to my fanfiction!" The creator kicked the box to his fanfiction, and the box was somehow normal sized.
"FREE BOX!" Cried Ed, and he opened up the box and saw the random man.
"Ey? Why'd I get so small? and why da heck are you looking at me like that? Am I in America?" The random guy said, now as big as a Sweet Tart.
"SHOE FRESHENER!" Yelled Ed.
"No no no!" Yelled the tiny random guy and Ed stuffed him into his shoe and is now a character in the fanfiction.
"Ed?" Said Eddy, "Your shoe is screaming."
"That just means the new shoe freshener the creator gave me is working."
"Cool there are more in this box!" Yelled Eddy, seeing all of the fourth wall builders.
"Good things come to those who sit." Said Ed.
"Cool!" Eddy yelled, "One of these is a seat freshener!"
"That's just cruel." Said Jonny.
PAUSE!
"Okay." Said the creator, "Since these tiny fourth wall builders have left the fourth wall in a shoebox, I've put my creator's touch spell on the fourth wall to fix it whenever it's damaged, but since some crude humor will erupt if I continue this story any further, we must end this chapter."
A tiny fourth wall builder rolled a golf ball around a miniature golf course.
"Man that's just weird." Said the creator.
NO OFFENSE WAS MEANT DURING THIS CHAPTER