From yami'sguardian
dear japan,
mi amigito! i need your help! D: i recently found some abondoned baby turtles, and i've been trying to help them, but i have too many, and romanito wont let me keep them at his place! i really need some help! do you think i can send them over to your place? por favor! BTW i've heard about that you've had some problems with some rabid dog/fangirl. want me to brush off the dust on my battle ax? i WAS a former pirate you know. i will fight to protect my friends!
yours the(ex)pirate, antonio
Dear Antonio-san,
Sea turtles? I heard about this. Weren't you two out eating at a restaurant for a date when that happened? Or was it your house... my mind is foggy. Must be my old age.
I would very much enjoy helping you return those turtles to safety, my friend... But hold them at my place? I'm afraid of what the cats might do to them... plus, my people do love sea food... I think you should send them elsewhere, Antonio-san...
Weren't you and Arthur-san both pirates? Alfred-san makes fun of Arthur-san a lot for that... I think it's slightly admirable, if I'm allowed to be honest here. I was only a samurai and a ninja...
As for Akuma-san, yes, she is pestering me and refusing to leave me alone.
I get love letters from her at my front door... not to mention the drawings. I'll only say that she is better than me with her hentai... I almost cried.
TASUKETE!
I-I mean... I am a strong man! I survived years in isolation and came out fine (even though everyone thought I was weird). I can handle Akuma-san, but thank you for the offer.
Secretly Wanting Help,
Honda Kiku,
-Japan/Nihon
Tasukete: Help!
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