AN: This chapter turned out to be pretty long so I split it the best way I could. It was hard because you can't interrupt the flow of the dialogue otherwise it sucks. So...I chose a flashback area to interrupt. I'm really sorry for the long chapters but since I'm not updating quickly then most of you should be happy. Also, I now own Bret Hart's DVD biography. It's conveniently placed right next to Heartbreak and Triumph. If you don't own either of these DVD's then you need to get them. Well worth the buy and very informative. Even though I've heard both their sides, I'm still using my writer's gut instinct and the story will continue as I planned. It won't be too much longer because I didn't want to make this story too long. So...yeah.

"I…I don't…" Bret leaned back against the divider for he was barely able to speak or stand from the shock. Raped…They raped…Shawn? He couldn't believe it and yet he knew it was plausible. Shawn was never the manliest of men and when he first made his debut in the business, a lot of guys hated him for being so girlish. Even Bret grew to hate him for it eventually but for different reasons than most.

Bret somehow managed to get back to his seat before his legs could give out on him. As he sat in his chair, he tried to recall the details of the night Shawn spoke of. He too had run into Marty that night but it was before Kenneth and A.J. smacked him around a bit. Where was I when they got to Marty? It took him a minute but it finally dawned on him why he wasn't able to help Marty. I was out drinking with the guys that night. Damn. Bret was truly sorry for what happened to Marty but in the end, it wasn't his fault. He'd gone for the night so there was no possible way he could have been there for Marty but Shawn…

Bret glanced over at the divider and saw that Shawn was back in his seat though he was eerily quiet. Bret sighed. I want to ask what happened but I don't know if I could handle it. Bret looked over at Chris waiting for him to ask another question but he didn't. Instead he just continued to stare at the floor as if at a lost for words. Bret finally couldn't take the silence anymore. He knew he would probably regret it later but what the hell? It driving him crazy especially since he was certain that he'd spoken with Shawn that very same night but he had to be sure; he needed to be sure.

"Shawn I…I really don't…know if I could handle hearing about your rape but I need to know. For peace of mind I need to know. That night…did I speak to you right after it happened?" Please say no…please say no… Bret couldn't see him but Chris nodded his head for him. "Oh…I…" That's why he was crying…

"Shawn do you want to tell us what happened during your conversation with Bret?" Chris asked. Bret shook his head.

"No. Let…let me. I…"

"I need to tell you how it happened," Shawn said softly cutting him off.

"Shawn look, you don't have to—

"If I don't then you will never understand why Marty and I were so close." Shawn took a deep breath and spoke softly. "I was…that night changed my life forever. I might have even brought the rape on myself and while it may have screwed me up forever, I don't regret it happening"

"What do you mean?" Chris asked. "How could anyone bring such a thing on himself and why don't you regret it?" Shawn wiped his eyes and somehow managed to chuckle a bit.

"Well, to address your first question…I suppose one could say I had somewhat of a big mouth."

"Somewhat?" Bret coughed.

"Tsk…alright," Shawn replied rolling his eyes, "maybe I had a BIG mouth but I don't care. At the time, I had to stand up for my partner. It was me and him against the world. We had no one else. Two years we'd been wrestling for Vince and even though we were as solid as ever, people were still ignoring us. Well…except behind the scenes," he added bitterly.

"Oh?" Chris asked.

"Yeah but that's a whole other story. About the rape…you see I stormed the locker rooms later that night. It was after I'd sent Marty back to the hotel. I think he knew I was up to something but he did as he was told and left me all alone."

"Why didn't you take him with you?" Bret asked.

"Because I figured I could handle it on my own."

"Yeah and what a job you did," Bret mumbled.

"Well I was under the impression that you could give a shit," Shawn snapped.

"You know what? Forget it. I'll just stay over here."

"You do that."

"So Shawn, what did you do? What did you say to them?" Chris asked.

"When I found both Kenneth and A.J., they were just stepping out of the showers. Both had towels around them and seemed pretty shocked to see me standing there glaring at them from a distance. They smirked at me ya know? Then completely ignored me and went back to their conversation. It pissed me off but at the same time it was an opportunity for me to leave without getting hurt."

"I thought you said you could handle it?" Chris asked.

"Yeah I know. At the time, I was a hothead who could just about handle anything."

"That's for damn sure," Bret mumbled, but Shawn ignored him and continued on.

"In my head I could handle them…well, with words, but I always had the common sense to know that physically, I didn't stand a chance except in the ring. I debated the issue in my head with my common sense winning me over in the end."

"So…so if you left the locker room, how'd you—

"I never left," Shawn answered cutting Chris off. "Something they said triggered the emotional, non-rational part of me and I exploded."

"What…did they say?" Chris asked.

"They…called him their little bitch and I…didn't appreciate it."

~*~*~

Shawn lunged at Kenneth while his back was turned rushing him into the locker.

"Hey…what the…?"

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Shawn screamed. He tussled Kenneth to the floor and just pounded into him with his fists. Kenneth held his hands up in an attempt to block his face but Shawn managed to land one right across his eye.

"Ahh A.J. get him off me!" Shawn felt himself being picked up and soon he was the one being shoved against the lockers.

"Ugh…let me go!" Shawn snapped but he was being firmly held in place by A.J. By now, Kenneth was on his feet completely in the nude. His towel had fallen off at some point during their tussle leaving him exposed. Shawn moved his head a bit but A.J. grabbed a handful of hair banging his head against the steel lockers. "Ahh God," Shawn moaned.

"Shut up!" Kenneth hissed. "Shut your face you son-of-a-bitch! Just who the hell do you think you are…putting your hands on me like that?"

"Marty's not your bitch!" Shawn spat.

"A.J. shut him up please," Kenneth said lazily. Shawn's head bounced off the steel again several times while Kenneth laughed. "That's enough A.J. I think he's learned his lesson." A.J. released his grip on Shawn's hair giving Shawn a moment's relief. That moment was short lived when his hands were being forced behind his back.

"What the…?" Shawn started but his face was pressed into the steel hard while his hands were locked in place by strong hands. "Let me go!" He suddenly felt warm breath near his ear and he cringed.

"Not until you apologize," Kenneth answered softly. Shawn knew he was in a bad position but he refused to apologize to them for hurting Marty. If anything they needed to apologize to him.

"Like hell I will!"

"Then you will get the same kind of treatment as Marty," Kenneth growled. "Hold him steady A.J. This one is mine." Shawn felt hands feverishly exploring his backside and it made him cringe. He twisted and screamed at them trying to get away but A.J. would just smack him in the face.

"Shut up!" he growled. A.J. continued to hold Shawn steady while Kenneth pulled down his tights. Shawn cringed at the feel of cool hands on his bare ass.

"Fuck let me go you bastards!"

"Not until you apologize."

"Fuck you!" Shawn yelled.

"Naa," Kenneth laughed. "Fuck YOU!" Kenneth gripped his hips pulling his ass out against him. Shawn struggled to free himself but it was too late. Without preparing him Kenneth settled himself at his entrance thrusting hard inside of him. Shawn screamed from the pain, his insides feeling as though they were ripping in shreds.

"AHHH GOD!"

"Shut up!" Kenneth screamed. "You wanted to be big and bad so suck it up. Take this punishment like a real man. Marty certainly did. In fact you're nothing but a whiny bitch compared to him." Shawn bit his lip, whimpering softly as Kenneth pounded into him. It hurt Shawn so much and though he felt like screaming in agony, he needed to be strong for Marty. Tears streamed down Shawn's face as Kenneth caressed his sides, every now and then planting soft kisses on his back. He hated it but after a while Shawn found himself holding back the urge to moan in pleasure. A hand suddenly clasped his member then came the warm breath near his ear again. "I know you feel it Shawn…the pleasure," he whispered. "Marty did too and unlike you, he cried out for more. But you…I'm going to make you cum harder than ever before because you're going to be my new bitch whether you like it or not."

"Stop! Get you hands off me!" he breathed, doing his best to ignore the pleasure.

"Oh but Shawn you're so good…and so tight." He ran his fingers through Shawn's hair making him shudder as he pounded into him faster and harder…

~*~*~

"Enough! I can't…I can't listen to this anymore!" Bret's knuckles were whiter than ever. He didn't realize it but the entire time Shawn was telling his story, he had been gripping the sides of his chair furiously. How dare they rape him! And why…why didn't he ever tell me this?! Bret turned his head towards the divider glaring angrily at Shawn. "Why? Why didn't you ever tell me about this?"

"It was none of your concern."

"None of my concern? Are you shitting me?" It was every bit of my concern…

"Oh don't try to act all 'big brother' on me now Bret," Shawn growled. "You know full well you and I weren't all that close. In fact, I'd hardly call us friends at the time."

"Yeah but you know I would have helped you Shawn. I could have…" I ruled that locker room…me and my family…I could have stopped them… Bret banged his fist on the arm rest angrily. He just couldn't understand why Shawn wouldn't talk to him about it. Even after we were together, he never said a word about it… "I just don't understand you. Why do you always have to be so independent? Why can't you admit that you need help sometimes?"

"You're the same way."

"I wasn't as bad as you."

"Whatever Bret. Chris, can we get a move on now?"

"Oh yes. Of course. So uh…" Chris cleared his throat. "Yeah so Shawn, I know talking about the rape was very hard for you but before we got into it, you said that in a way you don't regret it happening. Can you tell us why?" Chris asked. Chris thought about letting it go being as the entire time Shawn was speaking, Bret was losing his cool but he needed to know. Most people would erupt into uncontrollable sobs and start damning to hell anyone involved in the raping but not Shawn. In fact, Shawn calmly told the story of his rape while crying almost the entire time when he spoke of Marty. Chris needed to get to the bottom of it and he was sure Bret was just as eager to know why as well. Shawn took a deep breath then spoke up again.

"You're right. I did say that and it's the truth. Yes, it hurt. It hurt a lot that night but the physical pain was nothing compared to all of the emotional pain. I suffered a lot but I was somehow able to hide it from Marty. I didn't want him know and I begged the guys afterwards to keep it a secret. Of course," he chuckled. "Nothing's free in this world."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

"I…kinda…had to agree to some things, but at the time I thought it was for the best. It was no secret that I was a lot stronger emotionally than Marty so it was a small price to pay to see him happy again."

"So…what exactly did you agree to do?" Chris asked. "Or would you rather not say?"

"No, he needs to say," Bret snapped. "He needs to say because I want to know. What exactly did you agree to Michaels?"

"What's it to you Bret?" Shawn snapped back. "Not like it matters to you anyway. You hated me; didn't want to be seen near me after the rumors started."

"That's not true!"

"Yes it is and you know it! Kenneth…Kenneth and A.J. made sure everyone knew that I was supposedly gay and it didn't help that everyone thought that to begin with."

"Hey that's your own fault."

"Maybe so but I was not gay at the time. Marty and me were just two guys who loved wrestling. We had a lot in common and had pretty much the same likes and dislikes. That's why we connected so well. Plus, I was young and alone. My parents hated the idea of me wrestling so I was pretty much on my own. Marty filled that empty void in my life. That's why when he left, I was devastated."

"So they spread rumors that you were gay?" Chris inquired.

"Yeah but that wasn't part of the arrangement." He sighed. "You see, I made a deal with the guys. They uh…Kenneth seemed to like me a lot. Said I was one of the prettiest guys he'd ever seen and was willing to be a lot nicer to me if I agreed to be his 'play thing' as he worded it." Bret cut his eyes away from the divider cursing silently. Bret remembered Kenneth to be this really tough guy. He was excellent in the ring and earned his popularity for his masterful submission holds. He was also the typical jock wrestler having played football during his college years. Everyone who knew him thought he was a bit full of himself and he had a habit of scaring the new comers. Bret knew these things but he never knew Kenneth to be so manipulative.

"So did you…agree to it?" Chris asked.

"I didn't want to do it," Shawn answered. "But the offer…I had to protect Marty."

"By giving yourself to that lunatic?!" Bret exclaimed.

"It wasn't your decision to make," Shawn answered lazily. "I did what I had to do to protect the only person who mattered to me."

"So you loved him?" Bret sneered. "Is that what you're trying to say?"

"I guess I did."

"Figures."

"You know what Bret? Now would not be a good time for you to start preaching to me about love, especially since you haven't the first clue about real love in the first place."

"Whatever."

"Anyway Chris, as I was saying…I made the deal with Kenneth and for a while it went pretty good. No, I wasn't at all happy about being used like that but at the same time, Marty was smiling again. Kenneth even apologized to Marty one day and never bothered him again."

"So how often did you have to...you know," Bret asked. He was trying not to sound overly curious but deep down, he really wanted to know.

"You know for someone who claims to hate me so much, he sure as hell isn't doing a very good job right now."

"Fine then. Don't answer," Bret snarled. "Everyone knows you were a little slut so I'm sure it was pretty often."

"See that's your problem. That's ALWAYS been your problem. You can't believe everything you hear Bret and for the record, I didn't become said slut until after you left me. Before that, I had only been with three guys in my life: Kenneth, Marty, and YOU!"

"Don't add me to your list of boy toys Shawn."

"And don't you try to assume you know anything about my sex life. Anyway Chris, it started off with me giving him hand jobs in the showers. I hated it, but it wasn't so bad compared to what they did to others."

"There were others?"

"Yeah, but after a while, Kenneth started focusing all of his attention on me, and that's when he started wanting more."

"Did he hurt you?" Chris asked. Shawn sighed.

"No…not really. The first couple of times I got slapped around a bit because I talk too much, but after a while I quit putting up a fight. I reminded myself that it was for Marty and…I don't know. I got kind of used to it. Plus – and I really hate to admit this – but he started spending most of his time trying to please me. It was…weird."

"He was obsessed with you," Bret said softly.

"I…suppose you could say that," Shawn agreed. "He would say things to me during sex, play in my hair…I can even remember him calling me his 'doll' once," Shawn laughed. "But all joking aside, he never hurt me. Just wanted to play with me I guess."

"So the way you talk it seemed like it was a pretty decent arrangement. If you had no problems with it then why did Marty leave? What exactly went wrong?" Shawn's face quickly turned into one of pure disgust.

"Kenneth told him," Shawn said angrily. "He messed around and told Marty what was going on between us and it ruined everything." Bret laughed out loud at this. "What's so funny Bret?" he snapped.

"Well you know what they say, karma's a bitch. I can't believe you'd even cheat on your boyfriend like that anyway."

"How many times do I have to tell you? Marty was NOT my boyfriend! In fact, we'd never even had sex."

"But you said a while ago that—

"I said that we slept together but not like you think. The first time we made love was the last time because he left me. I woke up the next morning and he was gone. We wrestled our match that night and then he took off."

"You mean to tell me that in all the years you two were together you only had sex once?" Bret asked. I could have sworn…I just knew they were lovers… Shawn quickly stood to his feet and approached the divider. In his softest, sweetest voice he responded.

"That's right and you know what else Bret? That one time we made love was probably more meaningful than any of the times I was with you."

"I doubt that," he scoffed.

"So Shawn," Chris began, "After Marty found out, what exactly happened between you two?"

"Here's the thing, I never knew that Marty knew until the night we made love because he broke down and told me. Before that time though, we were both making plans to start singles wrestling. Marty and I both gave Vince the Barber Shop idea so that Marty and I could feud. However, Marty never told me that he was planning on retiring after I beat him."

"So all of this came out the night you two…?"

"Yeah." Shawn leaned back against the divider and closed his eyes. "Everything came out that night…"