For this entry, it took both myself and my spouse to delve into some of the 'what ifs' surrounding the inner machinations of a Dominus corrupted Albus.
Descent into madness
Failure. Failure! FAILURE!
That was all he could hear in his mind
Mentally scolding himself again and again for messing up so bad
What had he done? What hadn't he done?
It was all too far-gone now
Too late to fix
Too late to apologize
And too late to save himself
…Or her
Dominus had been retrieved
But at what cost?
What further payment would he make?
After his defection
It became necessary to hide
in dilapidated hellholes that no human would dare enter
Lest he snap and harm them
The monsters that flocked to the monastery
Drawn to Dominus's power
Were of little consequence
They were obstacles
They were armor
They were tools he would use
And use them he did
Until she came barging in that door some weeks later
The light had gone out of her eyes
and a determination set on her face
that he had never seen before
He knew why she was there
The old man brainwashed her against him
And the real truth of the matter
Shattering what was left of him
He thought he had been ready to face her
Knowing what he had done
And what harm he had caused her mind
…But he had been ill prepared
Raging
He blamed everyone and everything
All of creation
But most of all
He blamed himself
The last of his humanity tucked itself away
And he coldly soldiered on
Leaving her relics to help her keep up
But his old self was gone
And was not the benefactor
It was whatever that he had become
That decided to play with the little sparrow
Amused by her endless pursuit
There were moments of clarity in the fog
But as time went on his 'payment'
Slowly started to twist things askew
Things that would have made him cringe
Or say 'no, stop' to himself
No longer held any consequence
Kidnapping the villagers was a definite 'no'
That his old self would have voiced
But did not
Save for treating them gently
As he withdrew blood samples
And sealed them away
But why to that effort?
Did he seal them away for their safety?
As a challenge to his pursuer?
So she would grow stronger with each trial?
Or did he condemn the last of the Belmont line?
He didn't know…
His mind as addled as it was
Was not about to clarify.
And the longer he let the whispers from those damned books
Comfort his shattered soul
The more he longed for it all to be finished
Regardless of what he had to give up.
Last thoughts, before the Shadows of Dominus take him.
I set out to save you.
I set aside my duties, I had cast off my title, given up my home, deserted my friends.
I strode out alone, all in the hope of doing what he called impossible.
I would give it all, again. Just to bring back what he had taken.
I strode with purpose, with a burning need to bring you back.
Yet as time passed, I realized I couldn't, and knew that darkness was taking me.
So, I set out to prepare you.
Knowing full well, that I was preparing my own end.
You look at me with eyes vacant of emotion.
Where once there had been joy, there is now emptiness.
Where once there had been laughter, now only hollowness.
Where once there had been life, now there is only the order to claim it.
Now those eyes, once filled with such life, now echo with the lies of the betrayer.
Once we were one, we had stood together in the sun, once we had been something more.
And now I stand here at the edge of oblivion, and I know now that this is the last time.
Ironic, in the end, it was me who needed saving.
Perhaps I can't save you, but I will always be with you.
And perhaps in time, we'll be together again.
When all turns to silver and light, when all the darkness fades away with the pain.
There, beyond the veil of the end, I'll be waiting.
I know you don't remember those days we spent together.
But know those memories kept me going, they kept me from the darkness.
You, kept me from darkness, right till the end.
My story ends, but I hope that this final gambit, this final meeting,
Will be enough to bring you back to me,
Even if it is my memories I leave to you, my feelings.
Come back to me, Shanoa.
I need you to smile again.
I need you.