"Um…Chris. Where's the divider?"

Chris looked over at Shawn and winced. "I uh…thought maybe you didn't need it anymore considering…"

"Shawn we're beyond the divider now," Bret answered irritably. "I've seen you. I want you and I'd much rather see your face as we answer questions."

"I'll only stay if you promise to keep your hands off of me."

Bret smirked. "As you wish princess."

"Bret…never mind. Just…don't touch me." Shawn plopped down in his seat though he couldn't help but notice how much closer to Bret it seemed this time around. Bret took his seat but only after leaving about a foot of space between them. Shawn was going to argue but he decided to let it go. It was bad enough having to look at him but arguing with him would be pointless. Bret usually had his way of winning in the end so it wouldn't do much good to argue with him.

Chris suddenly cleared his throat, the lights dimmed and then came the camera again. "Shawn…Bret. The Universe welcomes you back. So we're just going to pick up where we left off the last time. Your uh…trip overseas seemed to be advancing fairly well," he said nervously. "You two seemed to have been getting along really well."

"Yeah we were," Shawn answered grudgingly.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say you two took another hit in your awkward friendship." Both men nodded. "So I think the Universe wants to know what changed after that night. Did you start avoiding one another like the plague or did you two finally admit the thing you both seemed to have dreaded?"

Both men shifted nervously in their seats and then Shawn finally answered. "Yes and no. We didn't actually admit anything...not really. Well we did but in so many words. Outside of what Bret let escape him during our…"

"Lovemaking," Bret answered for him.

"Whatever," Shawn mumbled. "We never actually admitted anything for a while. As for that next morning, I think it was tough for both of us…"

~*~*~

Shawn yawned softly and sat up in bed. He felt great and he was pretty sure it was because he actually got some sleep. He hadn't been sleeping well at all since Marty left which made him very sluggish and irritable. But last night made all the difference in the world. Not wanting to get up just yet, Shawn turned to lay back down when he jumped. He thought it had been a dream; that it was all in his head but apparently not. Shawn quickly turned away from Bret doing his best to calm his nerves. He couldn't believe it. He just couldn't believe that it had happened and with Bret no less.

A part of Shawn felt warm and fuzzy at the thought. Bret was easily the most gorgeous man he'd ever laid eyes on but he was also probably more than straight. Shawn never really considered himself gay though after being handled by men so much it was kind of hard not to notice things about Bret. On the other hand, Shawn dreaded the coming days. He knew that Bret was probably straight which meant last night was an accident. More than likely last night was about a man who needed to end the awkward tension between two good friends. Having sex with him was probably the only way to do it as well as helping put away any overwhelming curiosities. It was all over. Nothing like this would ever happen again and they could go on being just friends again. Shawn knew this and yet the selfish part of him wanted to start crying even though he should have been used to this by now. Marty left. Kenny left and now Bret. Shawn jumped again when he felt a warm hand touch his lower back.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Bret said softly.

Too afraid to face him, Shawn simply shrugged. "It's alright. I'm just a little jumpy this morning."

Bret's hand moved up his back, tickling his spine. "I'm sorry. Are you angry with me?"

Shawn shook his head. "No. I…" Shawn's voice trailed off because he was too afraid to continue. His voice had started to crack and he was now on the verge of tears. This usually happened after he had sex with a guy but this time was different. Bret was the only one who didn't force him into sex so it should have made things easier to deal with but no. This was by far a worse feeling than what happened with Kenny. Without warning, Shawn quickly got off the bed and hurried inside the restroom. He flicked the shower on then his legs gave way and he slid down the door in tears.

~*~*~

"Why were you crying?" Chris asked.

Shawn took a deep breath before finally answering. "I don't know Chris. I guess I was just overwhelmed. I hadn't felt that attached to anyone since Marty and I guess I was afraid. I lost Marty and I lost Kenneth too."

"But he was a douche!" Bret exclaimed.

"Yeah but only at first," Shawn explained. "You see after I made that deal with him, I told you that he was nicer to me and I wasn't lying. He really treated me decent. It was like I was his prized possession. I didn't realize it at the time but when I broke off from him and Marty left, I kind of realized that I missed them. It hurt and as you know already, I cried a lot. If…it hadn't been for you, I really don't know what I would have done. So…so there. That's why I was sad Chris. I was afraid I'd lose Bret for good."

"Wow. That's some kind of confession," Chris replied. "Kenneth meant more to you than you thought huh?" Shawn simply nodded and went back to fidgeting with his watch nervously. Chris turned to Bret. "So tell me what happened next? How were your initial feelings the morning after?"

Bret sighed. "I felt pretty bad myself. I…kind of made up my mind after making love to him that I would do everything in my power to keep him but that was easier said than done. It's not like we could actually tell anyone about us. Rumors were already being spread about Shawn so I didn't want to add to the hurt by being seen with him so much. Then there's Owen who would always be around to keep me in check so I wouldn't have been able to be with him much anyway. There were so many problems with that one night and I should have just let it go. I should have taken a vacation to get over what I had done but I couldn't do it."

"Why not?" Chris asked.

"Shawn was my friend first. We were really close before I made him my lover so I wanted to do everything I could to at least keep the friendship alive. I figured that's why Shawn ran into the bathroom. I thought he was either feeling what I was feeling or just sick at the thought of having slept with me."

"Which one was it Shawn?" Chris asked.

"I was feeling sick but not because of the sex. Being with a man at this point was pretty much just another day in my life. The sickness came at the thought of having to watch you each day without being able to interact. I'm sure I was probably in love with you at the time but I pushed the thought. I couldn't confess something like that even if you were my best friend so I cried. I went in the bathroom to let all of those feelings out so I could get through the rest of the day."

"But I ruined that for him," Bret added sadly. "I just…I felt so bad about taking him like that so I wanted to apologize to him. I wanted to explain to him that I didn't want to lose him as a friend and I was more than willing to beg. But all that went out the window once I finally made my way inside…"

*~*~*

Bret watched him run off sadly before falling back against the pillows. Bret could relate. He was feeling just as bad as Shawn, if not more. But Bret wasn't entirely sure what Shawn was feeling. He really hoped that Shawn wasn't disgusted at the thought of having slept with a man. He said last night that it was okay but even Bret knew some things said during sex should not be taken to heart. Like my declaration of love… Bret shook his head. He could not believe he'd let that slip out of his mouth that night. The sad part about it was that it was probably true. How else would you explain the feelings he got around that beautiful blonde? Beautiful…

Bret rolled over and groaned. All he could see in his head were images of Shawn naked and lying on the bed beneath him; his hair sprawled beautifully over the pillows. The image alone made Bret feel a tingle down south. He cursed himself. Just how the hell was he supposed to get over Shawn if all he could think about was his naked body? Or all the sweet sounds he made during sex? Or how sexy his lips were? And how unbelievably tight… Oh fuck. I'm doing it again. Bret finally rolled out of bed and just stared at the floor deep in thought. In just a few short hours they would be boarding a plane back to the states. Bret sighed. He didn't want to go back. The thought alone made his insides turn. Boarding that plane would mean leaving behind so much. No one could know what he'd done to Shawn. Not only would it ruin them but it would also make life extremely difficult for Shawn. People already thought he was queer and if people knew about the two of them then they'd really get on his case. Bret knew this and yet he couldn't help but feel so weak right now.

Bret finally stood to his feet and started slowly making his way towards the restroom. The water was still running full force which meant Shawn was safely behind the curtain showering. Bret slowly pushed open the door with every intention of apologizing. He was going to apologize for taking his body and beg him to forget all about it so that they could still be friends, but no. All he could do was watch, brain dead, as the water drizzled down Shawn's back and over his perfect little bottom. The steam pouring off his body made it that much worse and Bret found himself faced again with the same dilemma as before. He was hard – painfully hard – but he was sure his reason for entering the bathroom was something other than to fuck the hell out of a certain blonde. Shawn suddenly turned around in the shower to grab more soap but when he saw Bret standing there he froze. Their eyes locked and then Bret suddenly felt heat rise to his face when the blonde's eyes lowered noticing his little problem. Shawn blushed, apparently too nervous to say or do anything. The pain in Bret's lower half finally won him over and he found himself stepping inside the shower just mere inches from Shawn. Bret reached out to touch his face and Shawn looked up with eyes that made Bret forget all about "letting him go". Bret was stunned. Shawn's eyes shined like jewels but even in the shower Bret could sense the sadness in them.

"What's wrong beautiful?"

"Nothing."

He'd answered too quickly which let Bret know something was up. "Is it me? Did I hurt you?"

Shawn shook his head. "No, no…It's not…" But his voice trailed off again and Bret knew he was going to cry. The Hitman wrapped his arms around the blonde doing his best to ignore the tingle below.

"I did this to you and I'm sorry. I never meant to ruin our friendship like this. I just…I let my body think for me and I was all over you before I could even think about the consequences."

Shawn shook his head. "No…It's alright. It wasn't…I think I wanted it to happen," he confessed. "It's just…we can't…"

"I know," he finished for him. "I know this and yet I'm still being selfish. I care about our friendship. You're my best friend and I don't want to lose you but…" Bret pulled back a little so he could look in Shawn's eyes. "You…I don't think I've ever felt so strongly about someone and to lose you would hurt my heart. When we leave here today I know we have to…I have to put aside my selfish desires but can we at least remain friends?"

"You…still want me as a friend?"

"Of course I do princess! I'd rather have you as a friend than nothing at all." Shawn blushed again causing Bret's member to tingle even more. That flushed face mixed with Shawn's alluring eyes and smile made Bret lose control again. Shawn barely got the "okay" out of his mouth before Bret was taking his lips. "I'm sorry," he whispered before claiming Shawn's lips. The kiss was just as electric as ever and Shawn's willingness to submit made it that much sweeter. The blonde allowed Bret to explore his mouth, moaning softly every time their members touched accidentally. Bret pulled Shawn closer to him loving the way his smaller arms clung tightly to his body. Bret nipped at his ear playfully. "Please don't leave me," he whispered.

"I-I won't," he managed as Bret sucked on his neck, tasting his delicious wet flesh. Bret quickly dropped to his knees ignoring the water that was now pouring on top of him. He took Shawn's fully erect member into his hand, using his thumb to caress the head. Shawn bit his lip trying to hold back a moan but Bret wouldn't allow it. He needed Shawn to make as much noise as possible so that he could at least have the sweet memory of their lovemaking implanted in his brain. Bret ran his tongue over the head and Shawn whimpered.

"That's what I like to hear beautiful." Bret sucked on the head of Shawn's cock, using his tongue to tease the slit.

"Oh…God Bret…" The Hitman finally covered him completely, sucking him hard. The sensation was better than anything Shawn could have dreamed of and he was now completely at Bret's mercy. His hips thrust forward into the warmth fucking Bret's mouth relentlessly. Bret couldn't help but to glance at Shawn every now and then loving the way his hair clung to his perfect body. "Ohhhh…Bret please…I'm about to cum…" Bret sucked even harder on Shawn's cock until the blonde exploded. Shawn's body trembled and he almost fell to knees had it not been for Bret holding him up. Bret smiled, licking his lips before lifting the blonde in the air. Shawn wrapped his legs around his waist as Bret slowly thrust inside him. Bret pushed them back against the tile and moved in and out of him slowly. Shawn's soft cries of pleasure were making it that much harder to keep a slow pace.

"Shawn…baby if you keep this up I'm going to explode," he crooned. Shawn smiled and started moving on his on, taking Bret deeper inside of him. "Fuck Shawn…so…good baby…" Bret grabbed his arms holding them high above his head and started fucking him harder.

"Mn…Bret…Ahhh…fuck!" Bret had found his sweet spot and was nailing it with every thrust. "Please…God Bret harder…" Bret claimed his lips for another fiery kiss as he slammed into him faster and harder.

"Shawn…baby you're so…good…I-I-Fuck I love you…" Bret slammed into him one last time and they both exploded with cries of pleasure. Shawn could barely hold himself up and so he clung to Bret to keep from falling. Bret kissed his neck. "I got you baby. I won't let you fall. Good thing you're just a little fellow," he teased.

Shawn raised his head, his lips poked out in a pout. "I'm not that little."

Bret couldn't resist taking his lips for another kiss. "Stop pouting and I wouldn't have to do that."

"I'll do my best…especially since…" His voice trailed off and he just buried his face in Bret's chest. He let his hands slide down around Bret's waist taking in the feel of his soft flesh. His smaller hands felt sweet next to Bret and he found his touch to rival that of a scorching fire, burning into his flesh.

Bret sighed. He knew what Shawn meant but he didn't really want to go there, especially after making love to him for a second time. It was just as good as before and once again, he'd managed to let slip his true feelings for the blonde. I feel so bad… Why can't I just control myself? Bret kissed the top of Shawn's head and just held him close. The longer Bret held him the harder it was to wrap his brain around the fact that he couldn't keep him. He would have to let him go and as soon as they boarded that plane, it would all be over. I don't want to… "I really don't want to let you go."

After a long pause, Shawn spoke up in barely a whisper. "And I don't want to be 'let go'."

*~*~*

"That day sucked," Bret grumbled. "You really have no idea how much it sucked…aside from the obvious great sex."

Chris shook his head. "Wow. So I take it you understood what Shawn meant? I mean, maybe it's just me but it sounds to me like you two loved each other."

"We did. We just didn't say it," Shawn replied. "It was like we were trying to fool ourselves. You know, if you don't say it then maybe it will go away. Man were we in for a rude awakening."

"So the plane ride…How'd it go?"

"Well, I finally let go of him when I heard my pager going off. Knew it was Owen which meant Shawn and I needed to get a move on. We both hurried out the restroom in complete silence trying our best to forget everything but…"

"I'll take it from here," Shawn said reluctantly. "We uh…had a moment near the planes…"

~*~*~

Both Shawn and Bret walked through the airport in complete silence, each male lost in their own thoughts. Shawn would every now and then glance over at Bret but his face was no more readable than it was when Shawn confessed his feelings…if you'd even call what he said a complete confession. Either way it was probably true. He'd had too long to dwell on it and the only thing that fit was that four letter word of doom. Shawn sighed. He wish he never would have let Bret room with him. He knew from the beginning that it was a bad idea but he never thought they would end up in bed. Sure they had shared a few "moments" but that didn't mean Bret would actually go all the way. Guess I was wrong and now I'm paying for it. I am so stupid…

They finally reached the planes but they would not be traveling together. It was for the best they agreed and Shawn was sure that it was. But it still didn't stop him from wanting to be a spoiled brat. He wanted his Bret but not in this lifetime. It just wasn't meant to be.

"So…"

Shawn looked over at Bret and forced a weak smile. "Yeah. Guess this is where we part ways." They both stood there staring at the ground in an awkward silence. No one was around so it wasn't like they had to act this way. Most of the guys were still eating breakfast somewhere but Bret and Shawn both were too sick to eat anything. Screw this… Shawn quickly walked up to Bret closing the huge gap between them. He took a deep breath before gripping his shoulders. The Hitman looked up, his face showing nothing but signs of pure longing. Shawn leaned forward pressing their lips together for a quick kiss. "I really do you know," he whispered before turning to leave.

~*~*~

"I kissed him and ran. Not literally but I took off not bothering to look behind me before he could even think to respond. I was crying…sobbing but I couldn't let him see," Shawn choked. "I knew…I just knew in my heart that if he saw me crying he'd try and rescue me like always."

"You were right," Bret added. "I would have come to you and made the pain go away."

"And we would have been worse off than we already were," Shawn choked again. "And I'm tired of talking about this. I want to go…"

"Shawn look at me," Bret commanded but Shawn shook his head furiously. "Come on princess. You're crying again—

"I can't help it!" he cried. "All of this…I don't want to talk about it anymore."

The room was silent for a while. Chris remained quiet in an attempt to mask his own feelings. He was sure he'd break down and cry soon but for other reasons. As for Bret, he just stared down at the floor, his heart pounding furiously. He loved Shawn. He was now more than convinced that he still loved Shawn and if it wasn't for Chris being around he would probably be all over him. Bret sighed. He hated having to put Shawn through this but he knew it was the only way to remind him of their bond. Bret looked over at Shawn and smiled. "So you didn't want to let your Bret go huh? Spoiled brat."

Shawn looked over at him and shook his head. "No I didn't but that was years ago. Now all I want to do is fast forward to Montreal, apologize for my part and go home. You should be ready to wrap this up as well. Your wife and kids—

"I don't care. I care about you."

"How can you be so selfish Bret?" Shawn snapped. "Your kids…you have kids. Can't you put them ahead of yourself for once?"

"They're all big kids Shawn. They can handle it."

"Oh my God…You're unbelievable! Look Bret, I'll play your little game right now and confess that I do still care about you. Hell I might even love you still but my love for you won't replace my love for John. It just ain't gonna happen. I love him too much to just go crawling back to you so whatever you have planned in that thick skull of yours, let it go."

"I don't have anything planned princess. I want you back but I plan on fighting fair."

"You shouldn't be fighting at all. I already gave you my answer. Go home to your family Bret. We're not the same as we once were. We've both moved on and are happier than ever."

Bret suddenly reached over, placing his hand in Shawn's giving it a gentle squeeze. Shawn looked up, their eyes locking and Bret smiled weakly as he spoke. "For some reason, I think you could be happier." The words hit Shawn like a gun to the chest and he was instantly reminded of a similar conversation – one he had with John not too long ago…

"Say…John?"

"What do you want?" he grumbled.

"Are you happy?"

Shawn heard John chuckle behind him which made him smile. "What the hell kind of question is that? Of course I'm happy. Couldn't be any happier."

"Oh. Okay. If you say so," he answered casually. Shawn could feel John's eyes boring into him which meant he struck a nerve.

"What? Do I look unhappy to you?" the Texan asked. His tone of voice seemed to be a mixture of uncertainty and curiosity which didn't surprise Shawn at all. Vince McMahon always told him that he had a scary knack for reading people. Sometimes he was so good at it that it actually pissed people off but that was not his intention right now. Shawn quickly turned to face his boss staring at him intensely. He closed the gap between them leaving mere inches of space. The heat began to rise to John's face again and he could feel himself wanting to run away. Shawn slid his hands down John's arms then clasped his hands. He stared down at their hands as he answered softly.

"No. You don't. You seem like you're happy enough but I think you could be happier." John was not expecting such an answer but if Shawn was looking to make him think, he succeeded. John never really sat down to think about his happiness. To John, as long as he was wrestling and had lots of money he was happy. Never had he thought of other things to make him happy, especially after Ron left. Since then happiness meant money, beer, the occasional sex, and wrestling. That was all he needed right?

"Since you have all the answers kitten then tell me how I can be happier?" The blonde suddenly looked up at him with a softened expression that made John's heart skip a beat. Shawn reached up and cupped the side of his face drawing a low hiss from John. "Shawn, don't…" he moaned.

"If I really get you to Wrestlemania as champ, will that make you happy?" he asked. For a moment John was unable to speak. It was a combination of the question, mixed with Shawn's alluring voice…his touch…his eyes…it all seemed to make his head spin.

"Wow. Shawn I—

"Will it John? Please. I really wanna know."

"I…I suppose it would but Shawn—

"Done. I'll get you to Mania as champ." Shawn quickly let go of John's hands and left the locker room…

"Shawn? Shawn, are you alright?" Shawn was clasping Bret's hand, trembling with tears streaming down his face again. "Shawn what's wrong?" Bret asked. Shawn quickly stood to his feet and hurried out of the room. He needed to see John. He couldn't explain it nor could he explain why all of a sudden he couldn't sense John anymore.

Shawn didn't stop running until he was standing inside the elevator heading for the exit. Bret's words triggered such a strong memory about John that Shawn felt like he'd explode if he didn't get to John soon. That memory – that moment with John from that day was the very reason they were together. John took a chance on his happiness by allowing Shawn to decide what's better for him. In the end, Shawn chose himself as John's ultimate happiness instead of some piece of gold. Was it smart? Shawn thought so at the time but the more time he spent with Bret the more time he had to wonder whether or not he was setting both him and John up for failure. He didn't want to fail. He loved John and he knew John loved him too. They'd been through so much together that the thought of betraying John was just unheard of, especially since he was the one who came to him in his moment of need and possibly the lowest point in his entire life…

"LET ME GO!"

"Oh no. You're about to make Kurt's dream come true," Adam sang. Glen and Adam pulled Shawn to his feet and slung him hard against the wall. Glen pinned Shawn's arms high above his head while Adam yanked his jogging pants down. Kurt stood behind Shawn eyeing his bottom like candy.

"You know Shawn, has anyone ever told you that you have a perfect ass?"

"Let…me…GO!"

"I don't think so," Kurt sang. He unzipped his jeans revealing his hard member. He stroked it a few times before he reached out pulling Shawn's hips toward him.

"No…Kurt please don't do this," Shawn begged but his begging was drowned out by laughter.

"Not doing all that smack talk now are you Shawn?"…

Shawn got in his car and sped away from headquarters. When he reached the hotel he didn't stop moving until he was standing outside their suite. Shawn fumbled with the card key letting himself inside the room. John...Please John... He stopped short, his heart suddenly breaking in two. Gone. All of John's things were gone. For a second Shawn considered that maybe John took his things back to Trips room but he knew better. He knew John. In fact he knew John better than John probably knew himself which meant Shawn was right. He was gone and now Shawn was completely alone. Shawn managed to take two steps before the weight of his heart sent him to his knees. He covered his face with his hands and started crying. His John was gone and Shawn knew that he was probably long gone by now and possibly forever.

AN: Thanks to everyone who's been reviewing. You know who you are including a new reader, HBKvixen. Hope you all are still enjoying the updates. I try to reply to all of you but sometimes I forget. But you all know why. Trying to manage five stories on two different accounts is crazy business. So...things you should know about this fic: 1) Flashbacks are from 'The Deal' 2) The fight's not over yet 3) The other friends will eventually make their debut 4) I have been trying my best to figure out a way to shorten this fic but I can't skip certain things not to mention it will cloud the main plot which is the fight between Bret & Shawn so who knows how long this damn fic will be. But I am about ready to fire it. Its giving me a headache moreso than 'The Deal' did. Dont expect another update on this one any time soon. Maybe I'll update the 'Wrestling Gods'...

FYI: Some of us at Ero have a twitter now. If you want to add me let me know in your review and I'll send you my addy. Just be sure to tell me who you are when I add you so I'll know who I'm talking to. My life's not all that interesting mind you but I do actually tweet several times a day.

Oh and be sure to check out some of the fics I recommended in the last chapter or two. They're all really good. Chisato-chan, glad you enjoyed the HBK/JBL OST from "Piece of me: The HBKronicles". I was thinking specifically of you when I wrote it.