A/N: Timeline – The Serpent's Pass

Avatar: The Last Airbender

Pillow Talk

Chapter 14: Bittersweet Melodies

Life wasn't simple, the world wasn't simple and to the young man staring pointedly at the dirt worn path, kneading his forehead with his weary fingers, it was if nothing in his life had ever been…simple.

He had spent the last several hours thinking of her. Her beautiful clear-blue eyes and radiant smile; the way she would laugh at his corny jokes, the way she smelled like lilacs, even when none were around. And then there was the way she would look at him, her eyes dancing in the way they always had, beautiful and bold, glimmering with just a touch of hope while echoing an unmistakable expression of sadness. He wanted desperately to take that sadness from her. To fill her life with the hope and love that consumed her in those rare moments when she was not strangled by her duties and responsibilities. He wanted to make her happy, despite how useless that desire was.

But most of all, he remembered how she died, sacrificing her life for all the people of this planet who depended on the light of the moon. And those angry tears of uselessness burned at the corner of his eyes as he was reminded again of holding her in his arms as she faded from existence, that last lingering kiss that still stayed with him. Even now his lips tingled with that same longing sensation and he doubted he'd ever forget that. His thoughts, as so often happened of late, resided on what could have been, or if the Spirits were more benevolent, what should have been the perfect love story.

Rather he was left with his thoughts, both bitter and angry, that what he wanted in life was denied him.

Then there was Suki. Her presence among their tiny little group confused him. He wasn't so dense as to not to realize what she wanted from him, and if were to be honest with himself, some part of him was happy that she was here. She had never strayed far from his mind, until he had found Yue. And the tragic end to that relationship had shocked him into a sense of denial, closing off his heart for fear of being hurt again. He didn't want to hurt anymore.

But here she was, the beautiful Kyoshi Warrior who had muscled her way into their journey through the Serpent's Pass, fighting to reclaim her place in his heart, even if she had to tear that closed door protecting him from that revealing pain off it's hinges. And despite his best efforts to shut her off, to protect himself from what was likely to be another tragic ending to a story he'd rather not be a part of, she was resilient. Even if she wasn't forceful in her actions, she expertly toed the line between cautious optimism and fearful rejection that danced between the two extremes of where their relationship was bound to end. And despite his best efforts, Sokka felt himself vainly hoping for something to change in that relationship, but what that hope consisted of changed by the minute, leaving him as confused as the young woman who had initiated this deep-rooted introspection.

Raising his eyes from the dirt to the evening twilight stars, he fixed his visage upon the moon, ignoring the burning prickling in the corner of his eyes or the blurring vision that resulted. His breaths came somewhat unsteadily as he quieted his mind, hoping to hear Yue's voice in the wind, telling him what to do. Because at this moment he wasn't sure if Suki's arrival was Yue's attempt to comfort him, or torment him.

The longs of his silent lamentations had come to an end however at the softly scraping sounds of footsteps making their way towards his position. In truth, he was fully expecting Suki to come to him once again; perhaps she would apologize again for trying to kiss him last night. But when he at last tore his gaze away from the moon and turned toward his approaching companion, he was strangely saddened, and a little relieved that it wasn't Suki but Toph that made her way to sit beside him.

"What are you doing out here Snoozles? It's the middle of the night." She asked, not bothering to wait for an invitation or greeting before speaking in her own earthbender style of bluntness.

"I just wanted some time to think about some stuff Toph, that's all."

"Well you've been 'thinking about stuff' for the last three hours," she said, shrugging her shoulders in a show of indifference at the belligerent expression he flashed her. "Yeah, I've been keeping track."

"Why?" Sokka asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion. "You should be sleeping."

"Yeah well," the Blind Bandit replied, turning her face slightly. For a moment, she was incredibly uncomfortable with the course the conversation had taken. "I guess I've just gotten used to hearing you snore at night. It's hard to sleep without the lulling sound of a beaverbear growling a sleeping bag away."

Sokka flashed her an indignant look as he shook his head. "Your one to talk Toph. Every time I try to sleep beside you I'm afraid a nest of angry flyhornets are coming to attack me. And that's with your earth tent up."

"Bet you didn't know rock carried sound so well did you?" Toph replied, flashing a devious grin at the warrior before reclining back to lean on her hands. "So, whatcha doing out here?"

The earlier thoughts that had troubled his mind returned in full force, causing the young man to chew his lip nervously. For several moments the silence stretched between the two companions, an uneasy silence that held weight of two lives within it. Toph however was not the patient sort and did not wish to wait for Sokka to sort out his dilemma before talking to her. "Fine," she said, rising to her feet purposely as she turned to make her way back to the campsite. "If you decide to open your big mouth, let me know, but I'm going to sit here and watch you sulk all night."

The reaction seemed to startle Sokka from his musings as he turned his attention to Toph. He hadn't realized how much he wanted someone to talk to about his tumbling emotions until his friend had made to leave. "I don't know what I'm doing," he replied simply, his words spoken quietly in the silent evening air.

Toph turned back towards Sokka and crossed her arms, "That's rather vague don't you think?" Despite her usually surly comments, she returned to her seat beside the morose young man and stared sightlessly at him. "Do you think you could like, oh I don't know, tell me what's going on?"

Taking a deep breath and securing his thoughts, Sokka continued with a simple question. "Has anyone told you about Princess Yue?"

Twisting her lips from side to side, either through aggravation or thoughtful recognition, Toph shrugged her shoulders. "A little. Katara told me about her when I asked why you keep looking at the moon."

This really confused Sokka who seemed to blanch slightly. "How could you know that?"

"I may be blind Sokka, but I'm not without my other senses. I can generally feel the direction you're staring off at when your heartbeat starts slowing and your breathing sounds sad. After a few times this happened I was curious so I asked Katara."

"I didn't know it was that obvious," Sokka responded, his words echoing embarrassedly as his cheeks flushed. "Do you think…has…"

"Yeah, Suki's noticed it too." And though the words came out frustrated, there was a bite of hurt underlining the tone of her voice that was lost on the young man beside her.

"I don't know what to do Toph," Sokka replied, burying his face in his hands as he shook his head in frustration. "I don't know if moving on with my life, if Yue would approve of that."

"Why wouldn't she?"

"I don't know," Sokka said, and for a moment his words sounded lost and confused, his eyes brimming with tears that carried all the tormenting emotions that warred within him. "She's not here for me to ask."

"Then her opinion shouldn't matter," Toph replied in her usually harsh manner, shrugging her shoulders as Sokka glared at her. "What is it you want to do Sokka, that's what's important."

"I-I don't really know," he answered truthfully, however before he could fall into a further state of introspective depression, a stinging blow struck his arm, causing him to cry out in pain. "Ow Toph, what was that for?"

"You're an idiot, do you know that?" the Blind earthbender replied as she jabbed her finger into his chest. "You keep mooning over the same girl who's dead and gone, wondering how things could have turned out when you've got someone who's crazy about you right in front of you and you're too blind to see it. You can't even see what you're doing to her or how much you're hurting her because you're too caught up on the past. Stop living in the past and start living your life now.

"But oh no," Toph continued, rising to her feet and pacing agitatedly in front of the dumbfounded boomerang expert. "You've got to go pining over some dead princess, ignoring the fact that the girl who's just right for you, who's perfect for you in fact has been here the whole time. And all she's ever cared about was seeing you be happy…even if she doesn't quite know how to tell you. Because she's no good at this love stuff either." Toph said as angry tears began to form in her own eyes, her voice tightening under the strain of maintaining her anger in the hopes that her dignity would not crumble. "Why can't you see what you're doing to her Sokka?"

"That's enough Toph," the warrior screamed, rising to his own feet as the anger boiled in his veins. He couldn't believe Toph would disrespect the dead so antagonistically, especially someone he had cared so much about. "You can't know how it feels to lose someone you love!"

"Yeah, right," Toph answered harshly, the irony of Sokka's statement lost on the Southern Water Tribesman. "Let me ask you something Sokka. If your situations were reversed, if you died first and left Yue here alone…would you want her to mourn you the rest of her life? Or would you want her to live, for you as well as for her?"

Clarity seemed to finally dawn on the warrior, slowly at first as though trying to find fault with the logic of his small but powerful friend. It seemed unbelievable that Yue had been trying to communicate with him all this time, and he was so caught up in his grief and guilt that he ignored all the signs. She wanted him to live, to be happy. That's why she guided Suki to their little mission, to let him know that. Slowly a smile began to form on his lips, his spirit lightening more than he had known in a long, long time. Finally, he understood that Yue was giving him her blessing, to live, to love, to be happy again.

Turning his watery eyes towards his friend, he pulled her into a crushing embrace, holding her tightly as he spoke in such elation that he had found his center, his peace once again thanks to her. "Thank you so much for helping me see what an idiot I've been, Toph." And then pulling back, holding her at arms lengths he turned his face towards the campsite his smile broadened. "I need to talk to Suki."

And with those words, he was gone. Toph stood alone in the silence of the night, blind to the sympathetic moon that shined down on her in her sudden solitude. She fought against the sting, the hurt of that rejection that swelled within the center of her heart and expanded until she found it impossibly difficult to breath. Her eyes began to burn, and she hated the feeling that she would cry, hated that sense of how weak she was. But for tonight, just this once she let those tears fall, because she simply couldn't keep them buried any longer.

"You can't know how it feels to lose someone you love!" His words echoed painfully in her ears and her tears bled from her eyes at the injustice of it all. Because he was too blind to understand what she had meant, what she was trying to tell him. Or perhaps he did understand and simply didn't care.

She knew what it was like to lose someone she loved, because she suffered that indignant regret every time he was with her.

-End

A/N: Well, this was an idea I had a while ago. I know there's a lot of Sokka/Toph fans out there, and I'll admit I've seen hints of Toph crushing on Sokka from time to time in the series, but I think that's because she hides it well. Serpent's Pass was one of the larger examples of that crush she had for him, but I think this scene would have made it evident that she felt something for him. I hope I pulled it off well. The intent was that during her tirade, Toph wasn't talking about Suki, she was talking about herself, hope that made sense.

Also, FYI, I'm starting to dry up on ideas for sweet Kataang moments, so I'm going to ask you, my readers, if there's any scene you'd like to see me write, any pairing (except Zutara – honestly, that relationship just doesn't work) let me know.

As always, thank you so much for reading, and reviews are appreciated.