CHAPTER SEVEN
A SPURRING SPEECH
As I scale some fish I watch the projection of gossip television on the wall. This year's Hunger Games were won by the female tribute from District Five. Yesterday they interviewed her. Today they would interview all the mentors. Including Finnick. After watching the mentors from Three, Caesar announced District Four's mentors.
"Gem Nye and Finnick Odair!"
Out onto the stage walks the slender, Gem. She wears a shimmering blue and white dress. Behind her is Finnick. His bronze hair in its usual state of casual disarray. He wears a black suit with a light blue vest and black button up. A metallic blue tie wrapped around his neck. They shake Caesar's hand and kiss both his cheeks before sitting down before him.
My mouth hitches up at one corner as Finnick flashes a winning smile. I can't help it. It's infectious.
"So, Gem, how are you?" Caesar asks smoothing back his voluminous purple hair.
"I'm doing fine. A little disappointed that we lost Talia and Glade, but glad they were able to die for the cause," she smiles.
I can't read her. Maybe she's lying. Maybe not. She is known for her ability to deceive those who trust her. In the games she played the part of a triple agent with several alliances and murdered all the tributes in her groups in their sleep.
"And Finnick, when Talia and Glade faced each other in the top four, I was on edge. I mean, how did you cope? Were you biting your nails to stubs?" Caesar says laughing loudly.
Finnick smiles softly.
"Well, we'd trained them to know who the enemy was and I knew they would end up going head to head. However, I did expect one of them to come out alive. But when Talia cut Glade in the thigh after he'd stabbed her and he didn't make a tourniquet, I knew he was going to bleed out..." Fin sighs.
"So, you were well prepared for their deaths?" Caesar confirms.
"Is anyone really ever prepared..." he trails off.
I realize that he is beginning to quote me.
'Is anyone really ever prepared for the Hunger Games?'
That sentence I said at dinner repeats in my head.
Apparently he realizes he's started to quote me too because his smile fades and his eyes become distant.
"Go on, Finnick," prompts Caesar.
Finnick leans back in his chair and looks from the black space he was gazing at to Caesar.
"A friend of mine once asked me 'Is anyone really ever prepared for the Hunger Games?' I believed she was right after I thought on it, but after Glade and Talia's death...I've experienced it first hand and I now definitely understand what she means as a victor and mentor."
Caesar's bleached teeth form a devilish smile.
"She? Finnick... Is there a special lady we don't know about?" Caesar asks waggling his brows.
My jaws hangs open and I drop my scaling tools.
"Uh...well...not yet..." Fin replies.
"Awww... Finnick, just tell us...is it who we think it is? Is it Gem? Cause, if we said we didn't see this coming, we'd be lying!" laughs Caesar.
Finnick looks at Gem as if begging for help. Gem scoffs and rolls her eyes.
"Oh, Caesar, of course not. I'm ALWAYS prepared! Anyone who isn't is a little bitch," she scoffs.
Caesar regards her comment with a nod and glance then looks back to Fin. My hearts pounds outside my chest. What could me being Finnick Odair's sweetheart result in? Me being reaped? Oh, no.
"Come on, Finnick! Which lucky Capitol girl is it? Is it another victor? Perhaps...Johanna Mason?" Caesar presses.
Finnick shakes his head.
"Have we seen you with her? I bet she's all over you! A handsome devil like yourself!" Caesar exclaims.
Finnick looks right into the camera.
"I'm sorry..." He says before looking back to Caesar.
I know he is talking to me.
"Caesar, she really isn't all over me yet, but, yes... It IS Johanna," Finnick smiles.
For some reason, my heart sinks.
"Why did you apologize to the camera, Fin? We all saw it," presses Caesar.
"Well, I know Johanna didnt want us to go public for a few more weeks so..."
Now, I doubt my assumption that he was apologizing to me for admitting it was me. He probably was apologizing to Johanna Mason. Or maybe it was me... Maybe he was apologizing for breaking my heart.
Wait.
Okay.
I'm NOT heartbroken.
I'm hurt.
No.
He can't hurt me.
I'm mad. NOT hurt.
"Well, let's bring out Miss Mason!" Caesar yells.
Out onto the stage struts Johanna. Her black hair up in an elegant bun. The red tips of her bangs swept gracefully over her forehead. Sultry eyes adorned with sparkly black shadow and lips slick with blood red lipstick. A long black dress hugs her every curve and flairs out at her calves. A pattern like bark on her arms.
She shakes Caesar's hand and sits in an extra chair beside Finnick. He takes her hand. Again, an invisible knife stabs me in the stomach.
"Johanna, are you angry with Finnick for telling your little secret?" Caesar questions with a sly smile.
"Not at all, Caesar. I'm glad he did what I couldn't. I'm not exactly sentimental," she smiles.
I look down at the fish I have been scaling and continue, not daring to look up at the boy on the screen who led me on.
A drop of liquid falls onto my chopping block. I look up at the ceiling to find the leak only to feel a damp spot on my cheek. I touch the damp spot and look at my finger. I hadn't even realized that I was crying.
I quickly swipe away the tears and move on to the next fish.
My eyes move back up to the projection and I swallow my tears narrowing my eyes at Finnick.
"We're so happy together. Opposites attract. Plus, I love sex with him. I'm pretty rough and he can handle it," Johanna shrugs.
Finnick drops his head and shakes it. Gem's eyes widen and she gawks. Caesar releases a loud awkward laugh. I don't blame him. What the hell?
"Aw, Johanna, never shy. Right, folks?" Caesar chuckles.
The audience laughs in agreement. I don't.
FINNICK'S POV
I'm beckoned off stage and Johanna stays for her own interview. I shove my hands in the pockets of my slacks and my eyes are downcast as I make my way to the District Four green room. I enter to see Gem lounging on the couch. She looks up at me. A smirk on her lips.
"That was smart, Fin," she remarks.
I sigh and walk to the bar, pouring myself a drink. I had told Gem about Annie in hope she could give me some advice. She protected a lower class love interest once and I wanted to know how.
"How do you think she's taking it?" Gem asks softly.
I turn and face her, taking a sip of my drink.
"I don't know. She's tough. I...I think she's okay," I say.
Gem frowns.
"You feel bad, don't you?"
With a sigh, I nod.
"You did the right thing. Being with Annie is going to take time. You just have to be patient."
I nod again and take a seat in the armchair opposite Gem.
"When does she think you're coming back?"
"Reaping season..." I mutter.
"Fin! We go back in two months to report to the Hall of Justice and give our Spur Speeches! Do you think you can hide?"
"Yes," I snap.
Gem stands and walks over to where I sit. She puts a hand on my shoulder.
"I'm off to a bad start, aren't I?"
"Mmm, not necessarily... That Johanna bit was a good touch."
"Johanna..." I groan shaking my head.
"You should talk to her, Fin."
Gem pats my back and retreats to the makeup mirror. I set down my drink and heave myself up with a deep breath. I head to Johanna's room.
ANNIE'S POV
I sat on the beach staring blankly at the sunset. My heart aching for an unknown reason. Why? Why do I care so much about who Finnick loves?
Why is it so hard for me to grasp the fact that I do? Why can't I just admit it?
Because I'm scared is why.
I'm scared of him and all that comes with being in love with him.
FINNICK'S POV
"I don't really care, Finnick. I knew what was going on before this confession," snorts Johanna. "Obviously it's someone who isn't a victor or high up in Capitol. Who is it?"
I lean against the door, averting my eyes as Johanna undresses.
"It's a girl from District Four. Lower middle class..."
"How old?" Johanna questions.
"Old enough to be reaped if the government wants to have a good show or if I anger them," I sigh.
I see Johanna walking towards me out of the corner of my eye. She's wearing a black, silk robe.
"You're protecting her..." Johanna snaps, folding her arms.
I turn my gaze to her and nod once, with a silent 'yes.'
Johanna narrows her eyes at me and takes a deep breath through her nose.
"Okay. Here's the deal, I'm your girlfriend for three months. After those three months, I break up with you. You can act like you don't care but act like it was a surprise. Okay?"
Her hand is extended to me.
"Okay," I reply shaking her hand.
A seed of regret grows in the pit of my stomach as Johanna opens her door and gestures for me to leave.
I shove my hands in the pockets of my slacks and walk away. Now to plan how to hide from Annie in two months. My guess was it wouldn't be hard. Especially if she watched that interview.
Maybe this Johanna bit was unnecessary. Maybe the interview with her would be enough to make Annie wait a few years. Just until she couldn't be reaped.
I had to do without her for one more year. Just one more.
But would she wait?
ANNIE'S POV
3 months later...
I walk downstairs and start weaving nets for the shop. My dad enters the back room and offered me a smile. However it wasn't a warm one. It was a pitying one. He grabs a net from the hanger. I raise my brows and get back to weaving.
This happens three more times. Eventually, I hear the entrance bell ring as the last customer exits. I walk to the front and my dad switches off the radio before quickly facing me. A smile plastered on his face.
I fold my arms and tilt my head to the side.
"You're acting very strange," I remark. "You want me to go get some kindling for our fireplace. It's a little chilly out there."
It makes sense. We may be in a warm part of Panem but it does get pretty chilly in the winter.
"No! I mean, you should go clean up the back. I'll go."
I shake my head and go to grab my coat. My eyes flicker to the radio. What was on the radio that made him flick it off with such urgency?
In one swift moment I turn on the radio. My dad goes to grab it but I pull it towards me, backing away so I'm in the lobby and he's behind the counter. He lowers his head.
"-The Spur Speeches will commence in just a few hours in front of the Hall of Justice. Speaking will be our very own Gem Nye and Finnick Odair. Rumor has it they are on sight in town now. So pop on down into town! Say hello to our victors! And don't forget to stop by The Cresta Bait and Tackle shop for early fishing supplies! Remember, you give them fish you own and they'll debone!"
I slowly place the radio back on the counter. My dad looks down at me but I don't meet his gaze.
"They're advertising us... That's good..." I mumble.
"Annie, I'm-"
"I'm going to go get that kindling," I say slipping on my coat and exiting the store.
How did I not expect this? The Spur Speech where the victors hype up the games and how great Capitol is. In just eight months more of us will be reaped.
A breeze blows and chills me. I zip up my coat. People walk about the streets carrying fire wood or having their hands shoved in their pockets. I walk into the Trench Depot store. Complete with logs, kindling, fertilizer and coolers. I fill a paper bag with kindling and pay the man at the counter. I receive a warm smile. The same smile I always get. The one for the net makers daughter who lost her mom.
I leave and begin towards my home. My eyes downcast. Hopefully I won't run into Finnick.
FINNICK'S POV
I walk toward the Cresta place. I decided not to hide from Annie. Like my parents had told me, if I didn't go after Annie I was just plain stupid. Slowly I near her front door... My chest burns...
I'm so nervous. Gah, I hate being nervous!
I walk up the few steps towards the door and stop.
Nope.
I can't do this.
Maybe I'm stupid.
Nope, I'm stupid.
I can't see her. I can't.
I turn and head down the steps. Standing a few feet away walking slowly towards me is a woman dressed in tight pants, hiking boots and an oversized jacket. Her wavy hair is pulled over one shoulder. As she nears me, she slows.
Annie.
In one hand she holds a paper sack, the other hand is balled up in a fist.
Alright, Fin. Grow a pair. Let's do this.
ANNIE'S POV
Before me stands Finnick. His bronze hair fashionably disheveled. His firm torso dressed in a leather jacket. He is at my doorstep and facing me. His eyes are slightly distraught, then become somber. His jaw hangs open then shuts and he wears a half smile.
I ball up my empty hand, filtering my anger from my knuckles out of my fingertips.
"Annie," he smiles.
"Hi, Finnick," I reply civilly.
He is searching for words. Desperately. I'll speak for him.
"How's life?" I ask.
"It's good... I'm not too excited for my Spur Speech."
I nod and stare blankly into his eyes.
For a second his eyes flicker with an idea then he speaks.
"That and things aren't going well with Johanna. I think she's going to end it with me soon," he shrugs, nonchalantly.
I nod and we share a long gaze.
"Well, I gotta go inside," I say, maneuvering myself around him and heading up the front steps to my door.
"I'm sorry," Finnick says.
I take a deep breath and turn back around to face him.
"About what?" I sigh.
He shrugs again and looks at me embarrassedly, a small smile on his lips.
"Me dating Johanna," he scoffs, rolling his eyes.
I blink a few times and shrug my shoulders slowly.
"I really don't see why you're apologizing..." I say with confusion.
He looks at his feet then up to me.
"In case it hurt your feelings, you know?"
I brush a strand of hair from my face and shake my head.
"I don't know-I don't know why my feelings would be hurt..."
He looks shocked. I'm glad. I attempt to give him my blankest stare but somehow, a very small sneer creeps on my face.
"Oh, okay... Well, good... Ummm... Do you want to go with me to-"
"I gotta go, Finnick. See you at the Spur Speech," I say turning away and entering the shop.
That hurt. Bad. It hurt because I saw the hurt in his eyes. The shock. Hurting him hurt me. At first I was glad to hurt him, but now it sinks in how difficult that was.
FINNICKS POV
"Remember! You are thankful to the Capitol! All that they provide! All that they do! Keep that in mind! Remember, everyone is watching! Even the other districts! And Caesar will be interviewing all of you tomorrow night, so be prepared to answer some questions!" says my new handler, excitedly.
Her name is Malticia. She's very tall, stick thin and has a different shade of blue or purple hair everyday, along with matching outfits. Today her hair is lavender with fake flowers in it. Her eyes match. Her dark cheeks are adorned in shimmering purple makeup.
Gem wears tight black pants and a shimmering blue tank top. Her golden hair is sleek and smoothed back in a ponytail. I wear a black button up shirt that reveals a bit of my chest. My pants are navy blue. My hair messy. I'm a shadow of my real self.
Malticia slips out on stage after a quick introduction from our mayor and begins to hype up the Spur Speeches. Gem takes deep breaths, preparing to lie to our friends. Our family. She looks over her notecards mumbling the words to herself and nodding.
I thumb through my own notecards and sigh. I do NOT want to read these.
"Miss Nye," whispers the Peacekeeper to stage left.
He motions for her to come over and prepare to make her entrance. She gives me a fleeting glance. I offer her a comforting nod. Nodding back she takes a breath, shakes her head and stands at attention ready for her entrance. She sighs and puts on a huge smile.
"-your very own Hunger Games victor...Gem Nye!" announces Malticia, applauding.
Gem steps out onto the stage. The audience joins Malticia in a delicate fanfare as Gem enters.
"Thank you, District Four. It is great to be home. I dearly miss Capitol but this is where it all began, so their fondness remains in my heart. Especially in my home in Victors' Village. The one Capitol so graciously provided for me after I made this district proud when I won the Games. I was..."
She trails off. Quietly, I head to stage left and peer at Gem. She stands before the slim mic looking down at her cards. Her eyes are wet with tears.
"I was so honored when I was chosen to represent District Four. All of the other...all of the other..."
Her voice is thick. It's always difficult for Gem to discuss her Games. It's extra difficult now seeing as those she is addressing are her friends and family. I can understand.
Gem takes a deep breath and quickly swipes away a tear.
"All of the other tributes did their districts proud. They died, but they died with the generosity of the Capitol in mind... When the Reaping comes round this year, I pray that the two of you who have your names drawn realize just how...just how lucky you are to be selected."
Gem's eyes dry. I know that look. She is realizing that the safety of her loved ones depends on the enthusiasm of her speech. She continues smiling. Even when she cried that smile stayed.
"We are all lucky to have been blessed with mercy from the Capitol. I wish you all the best. Do District Four proud if you are chosen, and fight. Fight for your friends, your family and your neighbors. Thank you."
They applaud once more as Gem exits stage write and Malticia re-enters stage right. She applauds as well.
"Wonderful!" Malticia nods enthusiastically.
I look backstage and see Gem sitting staring ahead blankly. I look back to Malticia.
"And now! Your district's heartthrob... Finnick Odair!" she announces.
Clutching my notecards I walk out on stage casually. I kiss Malticia on both cheeks before she exits the stage.
"Hello, District Four!" I yell out.
The applause grows louder for a split second, then softens to silence.
I see the cameras at the back that project my speech all throughout Panem.
My eyes flicker from the cameras to my notecards, then back up.
I look at the familiar faces. Some know we are lying. Some see us as weak and think we have conformed to the life of the Capitol that has been "blessed" on us.
As my eyes scan the crowd, I see the only face that matters. Annie's.
She stands beside her father. Brown boots go up to her knees. Black pants hug her legs all the way past her waist and a white long sleeved top billows about her draping out from the waistline of her pants. Her wavy hair is pulled over her shoulder which her father's hand rests on.
His eyes are warm and pitying.
I look at Annie's. The harsh, cold look I had received earlier is gone. Instead, her eyes are sad. Sad and pleading. As if she wants me...but doesn't want to admit it.
Soft murmurs echo throughout the crowd. They bring me back from my trance. I look down at my cards and begin to speak.
"So wonderful to see you all. I can see that some of you have taken advantage of the Capitol's new merchandise for our breezy winter. Looking good," I wink at the crowd.
Some smile. Some laugh. Some do nothing.
"But enough about that, I'm here to talk about the Games and the wonderful gifts bestowed upon me for doing my district proud," I sigh massaging the bridge of my nose.
Here comes the part I don't want to say but know I must to protect those I love.
"Not to mention the...suite that the Capitol provided me and...Johanna with last week..." I say in a monotone voice.
Not only do I sound like a prick but I sound like a womanizer. To my fans though, I sounded like the hero, Finnick Odair.
My eyes try not to look at Annie but drift to her. Her lips are slightly parted...Her eyes are glistening... Mr. Cresta pulls her closer to him. His eyes between sadness and pity.
Her eyes no longer meet mine. She tears them away and looks down at her feet. Her eyes close.
"Winning the games... What could be...what could be better?" I say with a forced smile.
'Being with Annie...' a voice in my head says.
I look back at her. She opens her eyes. They are fierce with pride. Her chin raises in defiance of her feelings. I can tell they are sad. Sad feelings of heartache.
Then... I break all the rules. I suddenly don't care about Capitol. About my image. All I care about... is the net maker's daughter who used to boss us all around in school. The girl whose heart I have broken.
My thumb rapidly flips through the cards, and they fly in every direction. The crowd is filled with soft murmurs of confusion.
"I'll tell you what could be better... Me not lying anymore. Who here watches Caesar Flickerman?" I ask.
A few people mumble they do, others raise a delicate hand.
"How about that episode where I announced me dating Johanna Mason? You guys remember that? I sure do!" I laugh bitterly.
I look down at my feet and sigh with a small smile.
"Let me tell you something... That announcement? Biggest mistake I've made to date. Worst lie I have ever told. You want to know what the lie was about? I was never with Johanna Mason. In fact, I've never had a girlfriend! I sure have slept around though!" I say shaking my head.
I turn my eyes back up to Annie who stares at me blankly. Her eyes still glistening with tears.
"When I was talking about a girl I had feelings for on the Caesar Flickerman show, it was someone here. Someone here right now... I was afraid to say it then and I am damn afraid to say it now! But, first I'll make a promise. I don't know if I can protect you from the dangers of Panem, but if you give me a chance, I'll sure as hell try, Annie..." I say staring her right in the eyes.
The sound of the crowd shifting around to find Annie is in my head but not my ears. Her lips part ever so slightly. Her brows furrow in a feeling of love, rage, happiness and loathing.
"I'm scared, Annie. More scared than I was in the games. I'm so scared of you rejecting me or Capitol interfering with us. You don't have to give me a chance. Even if you don't accept the feelings I have for you, I'll not regret admitting this. I'm not embarrassed. I'm not."
Her bottom lip quivers and she nods once.
"I am not embarrassed to have feelings for the net maker's daughter. Not at all. I'm so not embarrassed that I'm announcing it to all of Panem, Annie! I literally threw out my speech and started talking about you! How about that?" I chuckle.
She laughs softly, I see her chest heave as her breathing hitches.
Some people smile, some people cry, some people glare. I don't really care though. My eyes are on Annie.
"And al-"
"Your very own victor, Finnick Odair!"
I look to my right to see Malticia hurrying onto the stage and screaming over me with a big smile. She applauds.
Then... Without being prompted... Everyone in the crowd claps. Claps loud. Even those who glared are clapping.
My eyes flicker from the crowd to Annie as I begin to walk offstage... And I am horrified to see her and her father being escorted away by Peacekeepers. They don't struggle. They follow, eyes wide and confused. Even the buff Mr. Cresta doesn't struggle.
I begin to lunge back onto stage.
"HEY! Hey! They didn't do anything! Let them go!" I roar.
The whole crowd turns and sees the Crestas being escorted away. They do nothing. What am I missing?
The citizens of District Four stare solemnly away from everyone.
I hear nothing. I see only Annie. She glances over her shoulder at me looking distraught.
I go to leap off the stage without thinking but I am restrained by two Peacekeepers. The audience watches horrified. I hear muffled sounds of Malticia trying to distract them with a closing speech.
"Annie! Hey! Let them go!"
Then I stop screaming my voice fades. The lights fade. A sharp pain is in my neck. The last thing I hear is:
"He's sedated. Get him on the train."
I want to fight back but my whole body is numb, and before I pass out... I see the huge eyes of Annie Cresta flash in my mind.
ANNIE'S POV
My eyes stay on Finnick. I'm confused. Excited. Angry. Happy. All at once.
Hands gently grab my arms. I look up at my father. It's not him holding me.
It's a Peacekeeper.
Me and my father are escorted away from the crowd. My dad looks down at me and I nod, assuring him it's okay and we shouldn't fight back.
I look over my shoulder at Finnick whose gaze flashes from the backstage to me.
A look of rage fires up in his eyes.
"HEY! Hey! They didn't do anything! Let them go!"
A look of ferocity blazes in his eyes. I'm about to tell him it's okay and that the Peacekeepers are not harming us but he begins to fight them.
He begins to jump off the stage but is restrained by the Peacekeepers. The new Handler of Finnick begins speaking again trying to calm the citizens of my district who are whispering to each other, wondering what to do. It's obvious that we are not being harmed but they've seen other districts fight for their people and can't decide if they should.
"Annie! Hey! Let them go!" Finnick cries trying to get out of the Peacekeepers' grasp.
I can hear his angry attempts to break free but they fade slowly.
I finally look away and we are walking through the streets of the district, escorted by the two Peacekeepers.
The people of District Four still listen to the distraction speech. I can tell because there are no footsteps behind me.
"Where are we going?" asks my father.
He is not answered.
"Annie, where are we going?"
I shrug.
But then I see where we are heading. The Capitol train. My dad notices and begins to panic. I know what he's thinking. He's thinking we are being arrested.
"Hey! We didn't do anything! We didn't do anything!" my father yells.
He struggles a bit more, trying to talk them out of taking us to the Capitol but he fails.
We are at the train.
My father sighs in defeat.
We near the steps.
They hold my father aside and escort me up the steps.
"Take him home," a Peacekeeper says through his mask.
My father looks at the Peacekeeper holding him and his eyes grow angry.
"Dad-"
"No! NO! You give her back! DON'T YOU TAKE MY GIRL! NO!"
He elbows the Peacekeeper holding him in the helmet and lunges towards me. I'm thrown to the floor of the train and the other Peacekeeper removes a syringe with lightening speed, plunging it into my dad's neck.
I pick myself up and scramble towards the Peacekeeper.
"No!" I scream, going to tackle him.
He turns from my father who is slowly collapsing to the ground and shoves me back to the floor.
My head hits something and I black out.