Chapter 25 Love Me, Love My Bear
Usual disclaimer: The characters belong to Obsidian and a lot of other people except an occasional NPC and a bear-loving ranger. Some of Casavir's dialog is paraphrased from the NWN2 OC.
Dee avoided Casavir's eyes as her companions looked from one to the other and silently exchanged shrugs while being careful not to let her see them do it. All except Qara, who smirked at Bishop, and Bishop, who had to restrain himself from laughing. He had hoped this was coming since that day he returned from his spying expedition to Neverwinter and found Qara sulking alone in the tavern.
Dee had failed utterly to see through the girl's facade of disdain, and so had failed to understand how much she had wanted them to beg her to come along so she could show them how useful she could be, how they wouldn't be able to get by without her power, how they would be fools to rely solely on that hedge wizard Sand. Dee took her at her word when she declined to join them again and again and now was oblivious to the depth of the girl's animosity towards her. Or Bishop's for that matter, for unlike Qara he kept it well hidden. She simply didn't give them much thought with everything else she had demanding her attention, to her peril.
Bishop was told by Katriona when he returned that they had left for Neverwinter the day before, so he headed with Karnwyr to the tavern. Time enough later to sneak into Dee's room since they would be gone for half a tenday at least. He spotted Qara sitting alone and bought the sulking girl a drink, and then another, and turned on his charm and flattery until he loosened her lips about the happenings at the Keep in his absence. Along with the list of grievances against everyone she delivered, Qara was all too happy to tell him what she had overheard about Dee and Casavir, how they were sneaking around until she had a chance to talk to Bishop. He flew into a rage, attracting the attention of Sal and the few other customers in the tavern as he ranted about what a whore the fickle swamp wench was, and how it figured that she would throw her thighs open for the paladin since he had a taste for whores.
Qara instinctively began summoning the energy for a Burning Hands spell even as she replied eagerly, "You're joking, Casavir and whores? Tell me more!" Rightly so, because Bishop's first instinct was to smash his fist in her in the mouth for delivering the bad news. But he was mollified by her interest in what he had learned even as he reached for the skinning knife Dee had made him that was hidden in his boot. So instead of killing one another he bought a bottle of fire whiskey and they spent the evening at a table out of Sal's earshot getting drunk and commiserating about how much they were both abused by life. He might have given the fire-haired wench a tumble that night as he half carried her back to her quarters except he was afraid of her setting the bed, or more likely him, on fire afterwards when she figured out he wasn't interested in anything but a screw.
The next night after the servants had gone to bed Bishop sneaked into Dee's room. He was afraid the tiefling might have set traps as Dee had threatened to have her do. But he reasoned that Dee would have seen that would put the servants in danger too, and she was oh so concerned about them. Wench couldn't even see what a weight these people were, dragging her down, and him as well if he wasn't careful. He lit a candle and began his search. To his disappointment he found the bed linens had been changed and her laundry basket was empty. Still, there was no sign of the paladin's presence there either, so he assumed that Qara was right and he wasn't screwing her yet. Bishop figured his holiness would never work up the nerve unless he thought they were about to die or she got him drunk. He snorted and muttered quietly, "Yeah, like that would ever happen." If he hadn't talked to that whore in Neverwinter and learned Casavir's dirty little secret, he would have wondered if the paladin's attraction to Dee was because she was built like a boy.
So he filled his time until they returned with hunting and making arrows and even showed her pet Wolf how to skin a deer he managed to shoot and tan its hide with its own brain. He explained as they worked how every animal had enough tannin in its brain to tan its own hide, then added "Including humans" just to see the brat's reaction. He grudgingly admired the brat for being a survivor though, and like Dee he thought Wolf had the natural instinct of a woodsman and maybe a ranger some day.
Besides taking care of her pet brat, he made himself useful to Katriona by teaching the new Greycloaks archery, though questioned what reason he had to be here. So it was truly over? Why should he care, he grumbled at Karnwyr. He was free, so why the hells did he stay? He reminded himself his reason for needing to be here at all was to find out what Duncan had told her about him, and if a lie is repeated often enough it's taken for the truth, even if the person is lying to himself.
Days later Karnwyr perked up his ears as he heard the wagons coming while they were still out on the road along the fields, so Bishop made himself scarce until they had pulled in and unloaded. It was easy enough to hide as the attention of most of the Greycloaks and Veedle's workers, not to mention Bishop's for a moment, was entirely focused on the scantily clad contents of the second wagon. Time enough for that later though. He watched from the shadows of the stable as Dee and Casavir led their horses in and turned them over to the hostler. He grit his teeth when the wench threw her arms around the paladin's neck and gave him a passionate kiss. From the familiar way he held her while they thought they were unobserved, with one hand low on her hip giving her a gentle squeeze, from the way they gazed at one another and the way she smiled that devastating smile of hers at him, it was clear things had progressed.
Her damned bear must have caught his scent, for he reared up and chuffed in his direction. She whispered to the paladin who stepped back, a look of guilt on his face like he had just been caught pilfering the temple. Bishop sent Karnwyr out ahead of him then stepped out of the stall he was hiding in, stretching and yawning as if he had just awakened. He had picked a piece of hay out of his hair and drawled, "Finally back, Captain? I thought mayhap you came to your senses and figured out what a shithole Nasher stuck you with and you made good your escape."
She turned to Casavir and dismissed him, but Bishop thought he was too much a fool to realize it. "Go tell Kana I'll be along directly." Casavir looked like he would rather chop off his right arm than leave her alone with Bishop, but he grumbled, "Very well, my lady," and left for the Keep. Bishop guessed he figured she was safe enough with the bear, who was staring intently at Bishop. She had watched him until he was out of the stable then turned to back to Bishop. "I guess you've figured out Cas and I are together now. I wanted to tell you myself. We got handfasted in while we were in Neverwinter, and we may marry next year..."
He used every bit of restraint he could summon up to reply evenly, "That so? I'd congratulate you, but..." He shrugged and dropped on his haunches beside Karnwyr and calmed himself as he ruffled his fur; easier not to make eye contact that way. "I could see it coming, so it's not that much a surprise. You've changed since that night at the temple."
She asked warily, "But?," as she dropped down on her haunches beside Cillian.
He suppressed a grin as she took the poisoned bait and replied with a shrug of feigned indifference, "I don't know, Dee. You've changed for sure. But you're a ranger, or at least you used to be. How long are you going to be content here training farmers, listening to villagers' complaints and signing requisitions when your heart is out there in the wild? How long has it been since you've been able to blaze a trail alone or sleep out under a starry sky? How long since you've gone fishing or hunting just because you felt like it? How long is that bear gonna be content to stay by your side if you're trapped in this Keep?" He knew that last one stung from the look on her face so he pressed his attack. "Have you worked the forge at all lately? How long before he suggests you put away your hammer and tries to tame you and turn you into a proper little wife and a proper lady?"
He saw her scowl and the anger flare in her eyes at once, so he changed his attack. "Calm down. All I'm sayin' is how well do you really know him, Dee? I didn't want to say anything to you, but I heard some talk about him in Neverwinter. I heard the reason he beat a hasty retreat to Old Owl Well was because he killed a man over a festhall wench..."
She bristled and cut him off as soon as he uttered the words, and he had to turn away from the anger in her eyes. "That wasn't why he left! He's told me all about that. He wasn't much more than a boy then. He's made his peace with Tyr, and Tyr has made His peace with Cas. 'Tis no one's gods damned business! Cyric's balls! Why were you digging up old scandals anyway?"
He held up his hands and used all his experience in soothing an angry animal. "Now calm down, Dee. I was just watchin' your ass trying to keep you from getting hurt. Don't I always cover your ass when you charge in without looking?" He gave her that little boy pout that he knew always used to soften her heart.
She sighed and scratched Cillian's head and looked at Bishop sadly. "Yeah, you do at that, and honestly I don't know why. Bish, we're not going to be together again. We're like fire and water. We want different things out of life, and besides, you know you don't want to be tied down."
He gave her a well-practiced wounded look. "Yeah, I've known that for a long time, Dee. I've accepted that. What really hurts me is that you can't accept that I can want to be here to help out without thinkin' the only reason is I want you back. We do want different things out of life, and guess in that sense he's a better match for you. I'd be happy for you except..."
"Except?" She gave him a look that demanded an answer.
He had her hooked, all right. He took a breath before he continued acting as if he was reluctant to go on. "All right then. You know I used to lead rich fools with more coin than brains on hunting trips. One night we were sitting around the fire pit, this was back before the trial, and they were all full of questions about you. I think that being your lover was the main reason they hired me." He paused and rubbed his chin as if trying to recall the details of the lie he was only crafting now. "One of them, I don't recall who...those old fools look alike to me. He said that it was difficult to believe in your innocence considering the company you kept. I asked him what he meant because I thought he was talking about me, and let me tell you, it was all I could do to stop myself from planting my boot up his bony ass. He told me a story then about the only son of a friend of his he said was murdered by Casavir, and then another of them confirmed his story. I assured them that you were as ignorant of Casavir's past as I had been."
She shrugged and looked down at Cillian, whose small brown eyes watched the ranger closely. He didn't believe a word that came out of the ranger's mouth. Not that he could understand what the sounds meant, but he knew that the tone meant nothing good for his bonded. To him it was like the warning sound of a rattlesnake before it strikes. Finally Dee looked back at Bishop and smiled ruefully. "Thanks, Bish. I do appreciate you tryin' to help, but you only heard one side of the story. Cas was led astray by a wicked woman he trusted because she had been a childhood friend. He was little more than a boy, and it was before Tyr called him as his paladin. Here's the real story." She related what Casavir had told her about the incident then stood and looked out the door of the stable. "Anyway, I have to get to the Keep because Kana's coming looking for me. You're coming with us to Arvahn? We're not leaving until next tenday though. There's a storm comin'." It wasn't so much of an order as it was a hopeful request. He could see the pleading in her eyes that told him she needed things to be right between them.
He smiled and stood and offered his hand and gave her his most charming smile. "Yeah, I know. Sure thing, Captain. Like I said, I was only concerned about you. Besides, you'll need your lowly scout. That's orc country, and it's been a while since we've done any orc killing." He winked at her then watched her sprint with the bear to intercept Kana and decided that he would still like to take a bite out of that ass, though he doubted she would enjoy it much. "Yeah, there's a storm coming all right, sweetheart. You don't know the half of it." After that he had played like a tamed monkey though it nearly drove him mad. The next night he listened in on them from the paladin's empty room (no one thought of putting a guard or traps there), discovering like Dee had previously that he could hear every moan and grunt from the other side through the shared fireplace, though there was nothing to be seen because the bed curtains were drawn to ward off the cold.
He encouraged Qara to play along and keep his confidence too, though trying to reason with her was nearly impossible. He got so sick of her usual refrain-"Why should I? I'm the most powerful one here!"-that it was all he could do not to put an arrow in her back as she stalked off. Little wonder the pansy always called her 'stupid girl.' But he could play along. He could be called many things, but no one would accuse him of being stupid.
Thus nearly two tendays later he was with them outside an orcish encampment, still in the captain's good graces watching her argue with that idiot paladin over slaughtering orcs. He didn't want her back at all, but it gladdened his heart to see them so miserable. He took a long drink from his water skin as they rested. He felt...pleasure at the sight. He knew her body language well enough to tell she was barely containing her anger, and he thought she should be furious with him for undermining her authority. He also could tell from the stubborn set of the paladin's jaw he wasn't about to give in either, though his eyes betrayed his misery.
Dee shot a glance at Casavir and recalled their first meeting near Old Owl Well as she sat sulkily chewing a piece of jerked fish:
The battle against the orcs had been grim as they were greatly outnumbered, and as she and Neeshka fought next to Khelgar and Cillian blocking for Elanee's and Qara's spells, both of which were nearly depleted, she wasn't sure they were going to make it this time. That grim assessment only fueled her battle frenzy, however. Though they were surrounded, though they were all wounded, and though three more seemed to appear for every one they cut down, she cursed and fought on. "Send as many of them to their dark gods as we can..." 'before they finish us' completed her thought, but that didn't have to be said. They all knew the fate of female prisoners at the hands of orcs; if they survived the rape queue, they would be worked to death as slaves, so they wouldn't allow themselves to be taken alive.
The very next thing she saw as she slashed up left, right, and left again for the killing blow was a sudden flash of sunlight glinting off a silver war hammer that came crashing down on the temple of the closest orc she was facing, and the tall, blue-eyed man wielding it. He wasn't alone; a blond woman was fast behind him and there were others besides, and the tide of the battle turned in their favor. She remembered the look of terror in the remaining orcs' eyes, and one's dying word—Katalmach.
Afterwards she had looked up at the handsome dark-haired stranger from where she sat on her haunches wiping her swords on the tunic of a dead orc, embarrassed that he had saved her from such an obvious ambush. "You're this Katalmach, I take it. We didn't need your help, you know. But thanks."
"Thank you then for letting us take part in your battle, m'lady," he answered with a mock formal bow, his blue eyes twinkling in amusement.
She sheathed her swords, smiled back and stood, offering her hand. "Dee Farlong, and this handsome lad is Cillian. But in the future, unless I've got at least a half dozen of 'em on me, don't get between me an an orc. I really can't abide the filthy brutes."
He replied dryly, "Yes, it's a ranger thing, I imagine." She wasn't sure if he was mocking her or not, but there was still that bemused twinkle in his eye. He took her hand and shook it. "Casavir, servant of Tyr." That was over a year ago, before Bishop had been forced by Duncan to join them, before Shandra had no other choice but to throw her lot in with them.
Casavir sat down beside Dee quietly and offered her his water skin, though his expression was grim. She scowled at him and moved aside. It wasn't her nature to fume in silence for long though. She kicked a clump of grass poking up through melting snow and growled, "Uthanck Thin-Blood, the brother of Logram Eyegouger. You honestly believe he was gonna negotiate with us? Since when can you trust an orc to keep his word even if we had slaughtered his enemy for him? And since when did you become so damned fond of orcs, Katalmach?" She made the name the orcs gave him sound like the curse it was.
He glared at her but restrained an angry response. Instead he uttered a silent prayer to Tyr for guidance as he took a quiet breath and composed himself as best he could. "Perhaps he learned from his brother's death." He rubbed the back of his neck and replied softly, "Dee, I've seen you negotiate with worse than orcs. We don't know what we face ahead at the sites of the other statues, and it would be better to avoid what battles we can. You attacked without warning."
Dee frowned at him. "I gave him plenty of warning. Didn't I say 'I think I'll just kill you instead?' You know what I am, Cas, and you know I can't stand orcs. If you're going to be with me, you better accept that! Once all this is over, if I survive that is, I'll most likely be back out here with Cill where I belong, and fightin' orcs is part of the plan."
He silently thanked Tyr for the insight and put his hand on her forearm. "You've been on edge since the Gem Mines. We were successful in completing that part of the ritual. What is it that troubles you?" She shrugged in reply. He wondered as he watched her what had caused such deep feelings of hatred towards orcs. Was it really a charge given her by Meilikki, or was there something else from her past? Had her foster father had something to do with it? "Perhaps you should let someone else speak if we encounter any others. I don't wish to quarrel with you, Dee. You are our leader, and for questioning your judgment in front of the others I ask your forgiveness. But I sense there is more troubling you. Tell me...let me protect you from what you're struggling with."
She shrugged again. "All those undead, especially the zombies." She shuddered and wrapped her arms around herself. "Don't get between me and a zombie. Gods, of all the undead we've faced they're the worst. Their smell alone makes me want to puke."
He gave her a half smile. "Very well then, my lady. I will be at your side fighting all the undead you want to kill...again." He smiled, that twinkle back in his blue eyes. It wasn't just the undead though that was enough to unsettle anyone, but it was a start, and he was resolved to coax the rest out of her if it took him all day.
Trust Zhjaeve to keep them in focus as she walked over with her arms wrapped around herself, trying to ward off the alien cold. Her irritation was clear in her voice. "Kalach-cha, you must stop this pointless bickering and set out for the next statue at the ruins of Riverguard Keep before we lose the light."
"We'll move out when everyone has had a chance to rest!" She regretted snapping at Zhjaeve as soon as the words flew out of her mouth and flushed in shame. "I'm sorry, but between the cold and the fighting we're worn out. No point in pressing on if we're too tired to face whatever is there when we get there. We're doing all right, aren't we? Found two already. Besides, I'm thinkin' we should head for this Temple of Seasons first." She unrolled and spread the map that the elderly traveler known as Guyven of the Road allowed her to borrow from his collection. 'Tis not very much farther, see? We should be able to scout out Riverguard Keep from this ridge, and 'tis all downhill from there. Since there's only three structures in the valley, I expect the fifth statue must be out in the open like that first one, so we can look around for it from the ridge. Either that or it's through that song portal you pointed out, and who knows where we'll end up then or what we'll have to face. We'll be goin' in blind, so 'tis better if we're well rested."
It had taken over a tenday to get on the trail as Dee had predicted, much to the Githzerai's consternation. The first day back Kana had Dee monopolized from the moment she set foot inside the Keep, asking for "a moment" that Dee knew would stretch into hours. However, part of this was her own fault because she insisted on reading every document and going over the minutiae of the reports until she was confident she understood them, and she was mildly annoyed at Casavir for pointing that out to her. The realization that she had so many lives in her hands still troubled her sleep, and one of her greatest fears was making the wrong decision.
Casavir finally broke in as Kana was introducing the spokesman for a group of people who wanted to establish another village on the Keep's lands. He knew it would take an hour at the very least to go over all the details, so he interrupted Kana diplomatically. "My lady Senechal, the cook said half an hour ago that dinner was nearly ready. Perhaps we can continue this after the Captain has had a chance to eat." He leaned forward and whispered, "I thought something was amiss with your bear, but then I realized that it was your stomach growling."
Dee was starving and finding it difficult to concentrate. She stuck her tongue out at him then smiled and mouthed, "Thanks." She turned to Kana. "I have a better idea. Why don't you all join us and we can discuss this proposal over supper? That way we might get to bed sometime before third watch. Torio, Sir Nevalle, will you join us too? Your advice would be appreciated." She told Kana she was going to change and wash off the trail dirt and quickly left for her chamber before Kana had a chance to argue, looking back over her shoulder at Casavir to see if he was following. He was, but he wasn't alone.
Zhjaeve also followed after a moment and caught up just in time to see him pull Dee into an alcove for a saucy kiss. He broke away and leaned his forehead against hers. "I swear I could taste that last kiss all day. I want to...have you in the worst way."
Dee chuckled and whispered, "The worst way? I get shivers just thinkin' on that one. If it was up to me, you could have me on the desk right inside my door. But there's no time but to share a quick bath." He gasped, and she pressed against him to confirm she had his full attention. "A quick bath. It will be less work for the servants to bring water for one than for two. But there's tonight if we ever get to bed, and tomorrow we can take a more leisurely bath together." She smiled at the desire burning in his eyes.
Zhjaeve interrupted from outside the alcove. "Kalach-cha, I must speak with you. Now that you have returned, we must leave at once to complete the ritual. I must tell you I fear you are becoming distracted from your purpose." Whenever the Githzerai reminded her of her purpose (nagged her was more like it), Dee felt like nothing so much as a tool, and thinking back to Bishop's carefully poisoned words didn't help.
But Casavir surprised her by agreeing with Zhjaeve. He stepped back, caressed her cheek and said, "Perhaps she is right, my lady. We must not let our feelings distract us from the fight against the King of Shadows."
Dee stepped out of the alcove and grumbled, "Yeah. As if I could forget for more than a hour. We're not leavin' for a tenday at least, Zhjaeve. There's a storm coming."
The Githzerai knitted brows showed her annoyance, as did her folded her arms. "Storm or not, time is of the essence, and we have delayed far too long as it is! I fear sometimes you do not comprehend the seriousness of this quest. This is no time for a dalliance!"
Casavir flushed and put a hand on Dee's shoulder to restrain her as Dee snapped, "Tell me, when will I have time, when we're all dead? Go ask Elanee if you don't believe me! You don't know this world, so trust her word if you don't trust mine. We don't want to be caught out of doors day after next!"
Zhjaeve had found Elanee covering the herb garden with burlap sacks, and the druid confirmed what the land told her. "Dee's right, the animals speak it, and so do the plants, though I also agree with you too that she's putting off this journey. We might feel differently if we had someone to care about as she has, as well as someone to lose. Be patient with her, my friend."
Dee was in no mood for any more flirting after that, and she couldn't get Bishop's warning of losing her freedom out of her head. She had just entered her room when Sand, dressed in one of his best gray silk robes, knocked and thrust his hand holding a familiar potion bottle through the door, explaining he stopped by on his way to see to the 'needs' of the ladies of the Ginger Queen with a basket full of bottles of the same potion. "The ladies want me to add some color to their hair, and the boy wants me to Paint his so it looks like Nevalle's. I believe you should be due for this tomorrow, but don't take it before then. You don't need any little blue-eyed complications right now, dear girl." She was glad Cas was out of earshot getting clean clothes out of his room and didn't hear that she had anticipated their becoming lovers and taken the necessary precautions.
So after a quick lukewarm bath (he insisted she go first and would only bathe himself when she was on the other side of a screen and the servants were all gone) they adjourned to the War Room, which also served as the formal dining hall. By the time they had eaten, signed the paperwork for the new village, and gone over the rest of the reports, it was very late when he walked her to her door. He whispered he would join her after he changed for bed. She changed into the nightgown he had bought for her and slipped into bed to wait.
She decided as she fluffed up the pillows that she would suggest he move in with her tomorrow. She was thinking of how she could make room in her chest for his things too when she remembered her mother's chest she brought back from West Harbor. Time to open it up then, and he could use hers. She yawned and stretched to ward off sleep and wondered what the hells was keeping him when she heard the sound of his shy knock on the door to the solar. He entered only after she asked him in. He stood there and gazed at her for a moment before he blew out the candles in the lantern and drew the bed curtains closed. He climbed into bed beside her, took her in his arms, and bent to kiss her, and she stifled another yawn. He murmured, "You are exhausted, my lady."
She kissed him then yawned again. "Yeah, but I'm not too tired for you."
He lay back and turned on his side to face her and put his arm around her, caressing her lightly. "Then let us get some sleep tonight. There's always tomorrow."
She put her arm around him, snuggling against his chest, and murmured as she drifted off to sleep, "If you're sure? I'll make it up to you in the morning then." She recalled how Bishop would have been on her no matter how tired she was, whether she was awake or not.
Dee spent the next morning checking on the the inn, the festhall, and the merchants and sent Shandra and Casavir with some Greycloaks on horseback to the farms to make sure everyone had enough supplies and firewood and bring any who didn't to wait out the storm at the Keep. She arranged watches so no one had to spend too much time outside at the mercy of the elements and gave the order that no one was to be on watch alone. She fretted over Wolf, who had gone hunting on his own, and she was about to ask Bishop to go looking for the boy when he appeared back at the Keep, surprised that anyone was concerned. She swore the boy was taller every time she saw him. He grinned at Dee and nodded towards the hills. "Something's happening. The animals were acting kind of funny, so I thought I better get back, though I only have a few rabbits for all my effort."
She got around to unpacking from Neverwinter that afternoon and called Neeshka and Shandra into her room when she opened Esmerelle's chest. As she had suspected, there wasn't much left in it. Trust Neeshka to find a hidden compartment in the lid and enclosed within a small bag of gems and packet of yellowed letters, carefully folded and bound with a blue silk ribbon, however. Dee set the letters aside in the bottom of the chest. There were some leggings made of a gaudy gold embossed velvet. Dee held them up and chuckled, observing to her friends that she would have outgrown these by the time she was twelve. Neeshka loved them though and could fit into them with just a slight alteration for her tail, and she squealed with delight when Dee gave them to her.
Next she pulled out a wide-sleeved robe which opened in the front made of red silk Shou brocade with a pattern of dragons. Shandra teased her that she must have inherited her love of clothes from her mother. Dee held up the robe. "Yeah, but it ain't like we had a choice but what we could make ourselves in West Harbor. I think my first pair of store-bought shoes spoiled me. Oh look, I can wear this myself! 'Tis short, but..." She slipped it on over her tunic and stood to look at herself in the mirror. "Think I'll wear this for Cas tonight." She picked up the packet of letters again and ran her fingers over the yellowing paper gently but decided she wasn't ready for that intimate of a glimpse into her mother's past just yet. Something was nagging at her and demanding her attention. She replaced them in the secret compartment in the chest, then she sat back with a gasp.
"Something wrong?" Shandra asked as she transferred more clothing from Dee's chest to her mother's.
"Did I miss a needle trap?" Neeshka looked at her with concern and ran her and over the edge of the lid.
Dee shook her head. "No, I forgot Daeghun sent me a letter through the temple. Getting a letter from him is a real novelty, but with everything that was going on, I slipped it in my Magic Bag and forgot all about it until now." She retrieved it from the bag and carefully broke the seal. She recognized his thin, precise script, much like Daeghun himself. "Shite!," she muttered.
"Bad news?" Shandra looked at her with concern as she finished emptying Dee's chest.
"I'm not sure, Shan. He says he went into the Mere after we left, and the dead zone was bigger than he expected! He's going to try to get the Harbormen to evacuate and spread the word to the other villages in the Mere. I should get word to Lord Nasher, but with the storm comin'...I'll ask Sir Nevalle if he has a way of contacting him."
She found Sir Nevalle at the tower along having lunch with Torio Claven and let him read the letter, but she was embarrassed to tell him she had it in her possession while she was still in the city. She thought it odd the former ambassador was there in his quarters, but they seemed to have struck up a friendship since she had arrived, so she put the thought from her mind.
He ran a hand through his perfectly coiffed golden hair and frowned. "I'm leaving for Neverwinter the day after tomorrow. If you would allow me to take this, I'll pass it along to Lord Nasher."
Dee glanced out the window. "The only way you're going out of here for half a tenday is to leave ahead of the storm today on a fast horse. But you shouldn't go alone. Take Grobnar. He's small enough he won't slow your horse down, and he has some pretty useful spells. Besides..." She looked to see if the Luskan woman was listening, but she had gone into the quartermaster's room. "Grobby's a master Harper, and he's the best one to pass word along on the Harper network as my father asked. He plays up the mad gnome act, but you'll find him much different when 'tis just the two of you."
He groaned inwardly at the notion of a trip to Neverwinter in the company of the gnome, but he also thought it was important enough that he shouldn't wait. So by the time his bag was packed and his horse saddled, Dee had explained the situation to Grobnar, who was tinkering with the construct in the basement, and prevailed upon Sand to send them out with as many scrolls and potions as he had on hand to aid them on their journey. She watched them ride off and said a prayer that Daeghun was just being overly cautious.
After that there was nothing to do but wait out the storm. Once everything was secure, Dee turned her attention to Casavir, requesting supper sent to her chamber. By the time Casavir arrived at her room and knocked on the door, she had hauled several buckets of water there and heated them on the fire. She was waiting, the room lit by candles and wearing only the Shou silk robe. She called, "Come in, love, the water is going to get cold, and so is your supper. And you don't need to knock."
He waited until she was on the other side of the screen before he got in the tub, and she gave him a few minutes before she joined him. She gazed at his broad shoulders and chest, the black hair glistening in the candlelight. She wanted to chuckle at the way he drew up his knees and tried to cover himself unsuccessfully with a wash cloth. He was so reluctant to show her his nakedness that she wondered if he had some sort of scar or deformity. But she was covered with scars too, some much worse than the one she had borne most of her life. She smiled at him seductively and slowly shed the robe then squeezed into the tub beside him. Yeah, that wash cloth was definitely not big enough to cover him.
She took some lemon scented soap and worked a thick lather on his chest to give him inspiration then smiled and handed him the bar. He certainly hadn't felt deformed, not that he would let her get close enough to see, or touch him for that matter. He was a very generous lover, but she found that he was very reluctant to receive. Part of it was no doubt due to his shyness, though she also didn't doubt it was also due to his aunt raising him to be ashamed of his body. A man's 'filthy urges' indeed. As kind as his aunt had been to him, she could feel the guilt he tried to hide.
The storm arrived that evening preceded by a howling wind that woke her from her sleep and seemed determined to test the strength of Master Veedle's repair work on the roofs. She got up and opened a shutter and stared out at the storm. Casavir got up and stoked the fire then came up beside her and put the blanket he had wrapped himself in around her shoulders too. "You were so still standing there I wasn't sure you weren't sleep walking. You're like ice! Close that and come back to bed, my lady. " She shut the shutter and the window and drew the heavy curtains. He swept her up in his arms and said shyly, "I...there's another way I can think of to warm you up, as long as we're awake."
The wind was followed just before dawn by an eerie stillness that woke her again, and then a heavy snowfall began as Lathander's first light broke over the hills. It snowed all that day and into the evening. One of the guards spotted Zhjaeve standing outside as the blizzard swirled around her, staring in horrified awe at the power of nature's fury. As she and Elanee led her back inside before she froze to death, Dee whispered, "See? Told you you wouldn't want to be caught out of doors today, nor tomorrow either." The only one who didn't mind the storm was Cillian, who blissfully slept through the whole thing after having taken Casavir's unused bed for his own, though he didn't tell Dee that he had caught Bishop's scent there.
They ate together, they talked, they read in the library and in bed, they turned the great hall into a practice room, she let him sketch her clothed and unclothed, they found different places and ways to make love whenever they could slip away, and she was making great strides with overcoming his shyness. They were about the only ones who weren't tired of the forced confinement.
They awakened on the fourth day to a morning sun that was blindingly bright reflecting off the snow. After allowing Zhjaeve to try walking around in the deep snow which came to the githzerai's knees, she reluctantly agreed they would have to wait to leave until it melted. Fortunately one of Veedle's workers was a dwarf from Icewind Dale with mountaineering experience who showed Jacoby how to fashion snow shoes to use in the mountains. After a few more days spent gathering supplies and learning to walk in them though the snow was turning to slush, they set off for the ruins. They decided that the with the deep snow in the hills the horses wouldn't be very useful after all. No one was more surprised than Dee that Qara asked to go along at the last moment, but Bishop wasn't surprised at all.
They approached the entrance to the Temple of Seasons with the weak late winter sun at their backs. They waited while Bishop and Karnwyr explored so they could be sure they weren't walking into another fight. Casavir offered her his water skin again. "You still seem on edge, Dee. You have said more than once that I withhold myself from you, but aren't you doing the same now?"
She sighed. "It's just..." She didn't want to admit it, but he was right. Once she began, her fears poured out of her. Who was she to be trusted with the kind of power she was gaining from the ritual? What had rattled her even more was learning from the shades and Balaur, the lore keeper,that the King of Shadows had once been an ordinary man who chose to give up his humanity to become the Guardian of his people. Much like her when she thought about it, though at least he had a choice, she added bitterly. He had been a hero to them then, but it hadn't taken long until they saw the danger of their creation and tried to undo his making. She confessed that she hadn't really thought much about what he was, where he came from, or what created him until now. To her he was simply a great nebulous Evil out there somewhere, the slayer of her mother, and responsible for so many other deaths. Yet she learned he had become what he was through the best of intentions, nobly sacrificing his humanity for the sake of his people, and was now nothing more than the embodiment of his charge to defend long-dead Illefarn. If he fell so easily, how easy would it be for her?
Casavir let her get it out then tried to offer words of comfort. "The gods wouldn't have called you to this quest if they thought you couldn't succeed, and you are not alone." He gestured at their companions. "We are all with you."
They heard Bishop make the call of a ruby-rumped swamp wren twice to signal it was all clear ahead. Dee stood and shook off the stiffness. "Let's do this. Two down, three to go, and if it's deserted we can sleep there tonight so we're fresh when we go face that ogre magi at Riverguard Keep. Now he's one I would suggest we negotiate with rather than fight, if we have a choice."
The lock on the door to the temple proved no problem for Neeshka despite its age, and they made their way from season to season, room to room, and fought the defenders along the way. The iron golem in the room dedicated to summer would have been a much harder fight if they hadn't already fought one in the Gem Mines and learned how to defeat it. She let Sand and Qara take care of it with dueling elemental spells, though she wished Grobnar was here to see its destructive power; she wondered aloud if he shouldn't reconsider trying to reactivate the construct.
After they met the challenge of autumn, the door to the last chamber slid open of its own accord, allowing her to receive the blessing of the Cleansing Nova. It seemed perfectly safe to rest there now that they had met the challenges, and it was even cozy after Elanee used a spell to warm the room. Elanee and Shandra were beginning first watch, Khelgar was meditating (Dee could have sworn for a moment he was levitating, but she decided it was a trick of the light), Sand was sitting cross-legged on his bedroll with his spell book carefully selecting spells for the next day, Qara and Zhjaeve had collapsed into their bedrolls and were snoring so loudly Dee was reminded of Cillian hibernating in Casavir's room, and Neeshka and Bishop were making rounds of the other rooms and looting whatever they missed, though Casavir was adamant that the tombs in this room remain undisturbed.
Casavir walked slowly along the row of the tombs of the four heroes, reading the inscriptions on each one by mage light cast on a coin. Dee watched him for a while then got up from her bedroll and walked up beside him. He put his arm around her, glad that the fight earlier was forgotten for now. "Are you all right, my lady? You should be resting."
"So should you. You seem in a melancholy mood." She turned to read the inscriptions aloud.
He listened and took her gloved hand in his then turned to her and asked, "I was thinking on these fallen here and on what you said earlier. Is this how all noble deeds end? Does any worthy cause last only as long as there are those to fight and die for it? And what if there is no one left who believes..."
She thought about it. "How many noble causes are there, really? It seems to me they're all the same. Only the participants change." She squeezed his hand.
He took both her hands in his and gazed into her eyes. "I ask this boon of you, my lady. If I fall, I would like to be buried here. It is quiet...I would speak with those who have gone before. I need to know if what we do makes a difference, but only after I no longer have a choice in life."
She kissed his cheek. "If it is in my power, I swear it, love. But I won't be buried in a place such as this." She tapped her arm. "This isn't me. This body, when 'tis nothing but an empty husk, bury it deep in the forest to feed the land. If you must leave some sort of memorial, plant a tree over what remains. I won't be there, but mayhap I can see it from Meilikki's realm."
He took her hands again. "I swear it, if it is in my power. Perhaps...it is time we make wills in case we both fall and make our intentions known."
She smiled tightly. "Yeah, a will's a good idea. I have nearly a dozen wards I'm legally responsible for that I have to provide for. But think about it; you won't be here either, Cas. You'll be with Tyr if you fall, and He can answer all your questions then, and mayhap sooner if you seek him in prayer. So is there really any point in hauling your remains all the way up here? Not that I'm saying you shouldn't have the burial you desire. You deserve a tomb at least as fine as this. As for me, I think I'm going to have make myself believe we make a difference and help right this great wrong that was done with all the best of intentions, despite knowing what happened to that poor fool we're trying to stop. Otherwise, I don't know if I can go on."