((I've always said that Air was an ancient idea. In that ancient idea, there was something that I very soon decided to ditch and come back to much later. That time is now. This colony and the way it developed is that old idea. It wouldn't have fit into what became Air.

The inspiration was a song for which I have nothing but contempt: Eisregen's Krebskolonie. (Translated, the band would be called Icerain, the song Cancer Colony.) I heard it once in my life and it's so over the top I couldn't help laughing, failed to take it seriously, because it's so ridiculously horrible it was just … too much of a bad thing. Anyway, the idea of the song stuck and is in there, less physically disgusting but the thought can be detected.

The chapter heading, in contrast, is what I threatened: an R.E.M. line, specifically from the song You Are the Everything. Much, much more to my liking. Recently anyway.))

Chapter 6

Eviscerate Your Memory

The landscape racing past had a certain beauty to it. Rolling hills of red sand, rocks strewn in between, and a few sturdy, spindly plants every few minutes. Leonard had no idea how long they had been going. The only thing he knew was that he would never find his way back. His sense of direction was rudimentary at best, and here, in the desert of Vulcan, it wouldn't help him.

T'Lin was manoeuvring the desert flier at a speed he found unnecessary. Feeling slightly sick, he closed his eyes and hoped they would arrive soon. Wherever that might be. 'Can't stomach Vulcan driving?' Jim asked.

'Shut up,' Leonard grated. Jim was unimpressed.

'What do you think?'

'That you talk too much.'

'Bones, I wonder … hang on.' The same moment the desert flier halted, Jim's communicator went off. 'Kirk here.' Leonard could hear Zh'Rane's voice purring from the device.

'A message from Admiral Ndaga. He received the data sent from Vulcan earlier today and asks if you want to spend the shore-leave the situation allows you on Vulcan.' Jim had a faint idea that if he refused, they would be called away. He made a mental note to thank Ndaga for all he had done for him so far.

'I was unaware that I'm eligible for shore-leave.' Zh'Rane paused.

'Is the information relayed to the Admiral classified?' Jim chuckled.

'No, Lieutenant. You can speak freely.'

'A bond to a Vulcan grants you two weeks of shore-leave at a time of your choosing.' It made sense, of course. Vulcan nature demanded that they dedicate a few days every seven years to little more than sex. Perhaps many Vulcans bonded at that time or shortly before it.

'I'll … Yes. I'll do that. The others, too.' Leonard stared at Jim. Putting them all on leave meant that it was up to them if they wanted to use that spare time to help with the research.

'I'll inform him immediately.' Jim smiled even though the Andorian couldn't see that.

'Thanks. Kirk out.' They stepped out of the vehicle and approached T'Lin. The Vulcan was staring at the landscape stretched before them.

'Arm yourselves and be alert,' she told them. 'If someone comes at you, stun them.' Jim and Leonard exchanged a glance and did as they were told. Slowly, cautiously, they approached a large rock formation. From a cave Leonard hadn't even noticed before three people stepped. They looked haggard and dirty and not like a threat at all. 'Halt!' T'Lin shouted. 'We wish to speak with you!' The three came closer until there were only ten metres between them. 'Do you require anything?'

'We don't need your pity!'

'I was not offering pity. We have water and food.' It was true. They had brought crates of rations. 'We shall leave them here for you to take.'

'Then leave them and go.'

'I ask you once again to return with me.'

'We need to stay here.'

'Why?'

'It simply is that way.' T'Lin closed her eyes for a moment.

'That is highly illogical.'

'You will see it, too. You merely need to be patient. You will be enlightened.' T'Lin blinked.

'Now that's new,' she said in an undertone. 'What enlightenment do you speak of?'

'We will shed our bodies and reach a state of being of the spirit alone.'

'You are ill. You require help.' For a moment, the sentinel hesitated.

'We will not be dragged away. But we have someone injured.'

'Bring them.'

'No, you must come.'

'We will not enter that cave,' T'Lin said firmly. Something twisted inside Leonard.

'I will,' he said before he knew he would. T'Lin spun and stared at him. 'Lead me to your patient,' he called. To his companions he said: 'Leave if I'm not back in, say, twenty minutes. There's only so much I can do anyway.' Jim wanted to protest, but Leonard shook his head quickly. 'Look, it doesn't make sense if we all go. There must be much more of them than there are of us.'

'You must leave your weapon,' the Vulcan told him, not entirely unexpectedly. Leonard handed it to T'Lin without hesitation.

'Bones,' Jim said tentatively.

'You know I've got to,' Leonard told him. 'I'll come back.' Raising his hands to indicate he was unarmed, Leonard covered the last few metres.

'You will not be harmed.' He nodded, feeling a hint of fear. Not too long ago, his willingness to offer help had brought him into captivity and nearly killed him. He pushed the thought away and followed the Vulcan into the cave.

The small, dark entrance opened to a large space with corridors leading outwards. 'This isn't a natural structure,' he said.

'No. It was made millennia ago.' The imprecision of the statement was atypical for a Vulcan, but that was probably to be expected. 'I sense your fear. I assure you that you are safe. We do not harm a man who offers help.'

'T'Lin and the researchers at the VSA offer help as well,' he said. 'You are all ill. Don't you remember what you were like before?'

'I was blind. We all were. Here.' They hadn't gone far, only a short way into one of the corridors to a small side room. A Vulcan female was curled up in a corner, cradling her hand. Leonard approached slowly.

'I'm McCoy. I'm here to help.'

'You will not bring me away,' she said sharply, rocking herself.

'No. I won't. I promise. Will you let me look?' Fixing her eyes on him, she extended her arm. She was warm, too warm for a Vulcan. He gently took her hand and turned it. An ugly looking wound in her palm had become infected. There was what looked like a small sting of a cactus trapped inside. 'This'll hurt,' he told her. 'I don't have any anaesthetics with me.' He considered telling her that the pain could be avoided if she followed him, but since he was certain that the woman wouldn't allow him to help if he did that, he refrained. When she didn't respond, he removed the sting and applied a disinfectant. She flinched. That, too, was very un-Vulcan. 'There's nothing else I can do here.' He frowned. 'You're a little feverish. If this gets worse, you need further help.'

'I will not leave,' the woman told him. 'This is where we all belong.'

'I could return to check on you.'

'No,' the sentinel said firmly. 'She will live if she is meant to.' Before Leonard could protest, he was hoisted to his feet by him. The fear returned with full force, but all the Vulcan did was direct him roughly back outside and shove him towards T'Lin. 'Leave,' he growled. Leonard accepted the weapon T'Lin offered to him. By the time he had it back, the three Vulcans were almost back inside their cave. T'Lin shot without a warning. All three crumbled from the wide range beam.

'Please assist me. We need to take one of them back with us to examine him.' Jim walked with her without question, Leonard in their wake. Together, they carried the one who had talked to them to the desert flier and tied him up before putting him inside. Observing their work, T'Lin started depositing the supplies. 'We should leave before the other two wake up. I prefer not to find out how they will react to what we just did.' Absently, Leonard sat back down in the desert flier. Somehow all he could think of was that these Vulcans, while unusual, hadn't seemed anywhere near as crazed as he had expected.

Ϡ

Vulcans generally were nothing if not realistic, and Spock firmly believed that this was also true for him. Now, however, he and Sinek were after someone who might be anywhere, and nothing indicated that Sinek would give up his search. 'This is futile,' Spock said at last. The other Vulcan returned from behind a building crouched next to the complex that was the VSA. 'We have no way to determine where he went.' Sinek glanced into the desert.

'Actually, we do, but I doubt that he is on his way there yet. A few days ago, we equipped one of the patients with a tracker and let him go. This is where T'Kray and Dr. McCoy are going. The coordinates came back to us a few hours ago.' Something changed in Sinek's stance. 'You are right. This is futile. He will show up.'

'In the desert,' Spock said.

'Eventually. Are you returning to the ship in the evening?'

'Unknown. I shall ask the Captain about his plans.' He was not going to ask him using the bond. If the patients T'Lin was showing to them were violent, he would not distract him.

'Well, if you don't, we can accommodate all four of you. Our home is closer than your family estate.' That was probably true, although Spock imagined that Jim might not want that.

'While that would be convenient, I am uncertain if the Captain is willing to sacrifice his privacy for the sake of practicality.'

'I believe you would have more privacy than on your ship, but of course, the decision is yours. All I ask is that you inform us before the end of the day.' Sinek took a last look into the desert before heading back towards the VSA. 'I shall record Stal as a new patient. Perhaps you can see if T'Kray could learn anything from her research on the computer.'

It had been a long time since Spock had been in the Vulcan Science Academy – and when he had been, he had not lingered – but as far as he could tell, very little had changed. He still found his way around, so locating T'Kray in a room adjacent to the library was not difficult. He found her contemplating the desk, her chin resting on interlaced fingers. 'Did you find anything relevant?' he asked at last. She looked up at him and raised her arms in a gesture that could mean anything.

'Like this? No. I'd need to speak with one of them. Perhaps if Sinek brings back Stal …'

'I do not believe that he will wish to speak with you.' Stal's prejudice against her would not have improved with the mental illness.

'Perhaps one of the others.' She indicated the screen. 'I am almost certain that this is not any kind of cancer. So why Sinek was summoned eludes me.' Spock sat next to her, resting one arm on the desk and glancing at the screen, listing symptoms so various it was hard to say much at all.

'Perhaps he was not. Perhaps it was T'Lin who was summoned.' T'Kray shrugged.

'Perhaps. I think Stal would have been our best shot. This is either psychological or neurological.' She smiled. 'Which might make Len the most likely candidate to find something.' Spock's eyes were still fixed on the screen.

'Computer, state marital status of the member of the Academy named Stal.'

'Marital status: unbonded,' the computer told them blandly. T'Kray frowned. Stal was too old never to have had a mate.

'Computer, since when and why?'

'Two years, wife is deceased.' She sighed.

'So all we know is that he's exactly what you'd expect someone afflicted to be.' Spock frowned.

'Not entirely. It says on your screen that the patients were all textbook examples of emotional control before the first effects showed. The same can hardly be said about Stal.'

'Perhaps he was already ill when we picked him up.' Spock's lips tightened.

'Or perhaps we should assume that this is not a factor, no matter how much some seem to wish to propagate this theory.' T'Kray blinked.

'What?'

'When we were outside, Sinek talked about various theories. There are some who say this is a psychological effect triggered by too much control.'

'Nonsense.'

'Highly unlikely, at least, but no harm can be done by investigating. The idea behind it is that the patients' strong hold on their emotions culminate in what amounts to a self-induced lobotomy. If that is the case, Dr. McCoy will be able to verify it.'

'And if they get a patient back here. You know, you're right. It's a theory, at least. The only thing they all have in common is that they are male. So far. Who knows if that isn't just a coincidence?'

'There is one thing. They all travel to a certain spot in the desert. Once there, they talk. They are paranoid, some of them aggressive. But they live longer there. Those that were forced to stay here succumbed much more quickly.'

'Yes. Go figure.'

'There is always an explanation. We merely have not found it yet.' The door opened, revealing Sinek.

'If he is seen, he will be detained. We will find him,' he said simply.

'In the desert,' T'Kray answered, unwittingly echoing Spock.

'Security are trying to intercept him and bring him here. His chances for survival will be very low, but there it is. Eventually, he'll will be unable to withstand the insanity even in the desert, and he'll perish here or there.' He paused. 'We have a guest. She wishes to remain here for examination and asked to speak to you, T'Kray.'

'What? Why me?'

'You are a psychologist. She believes it falls under your area of expertise.' When Spock followed T'Kray and Sinek to the broom cupboard again, he expected almost anyone. Except for the ancient, white-haired Reldai.

'Vires?' T'Kray asked with an incredulous expression. 'What can I do for you?' The brilliant eyes fixed on hers.

'The condition plaguing our people seems to have a hold on me,' Vires said evenly. T'Kray shook her head.

'No. Everyone who has that is flying head first into the desert and certifiable.' Spock frowned at the informal expression. After Stal's reaction to T'Kray, Spock had assumed that she would attempt to be more orthodox. Now that he thought about it, he should have known better. She had always been this way, and a scornful scientist would not change that. Vires seemed untroubled by her attitude.

'They are not Reldai,' she said simply. Swallowing, T'Kray sat down at the table again.

'With all due respect, why do you believe you are not channelling one or more of them?' That might sound strange, considering that Vulcans were touch telepaths. The priestesses, however, should never be underestimated. Some of them were exceptionally strong telepaths and might be able to pick up more than others. And insane minds might very well be louder than healthy ones.

'I feel compelled to walk into the desert,' Vires explained. She appeared entirely composed, but on the inside it might be different. 'Twenty miles to the north, follow the mountain range to an artificial cavern built before our living memory.' That the patients fled into the wild might be something an outsider knew, but where they were going was information the Academy had only acquired very recently. It was safe to assume that exact location of their base, if it could be called that, was not common knowledge yet. And even if it had been, there was no reason why the Reldai should lie. T'Kray looked at her for a full 23 seconds before she spoke again.

'If that is the case, how can you talk to me like this?' The Reldai raised an eyebrow.

'Control, young one. Iron control. I will not last forever. I need to be detained. There is, I assume, a room available for me? A room that I cannot leave without permission?' Almost hastily, T'Kray stood.

'I am certain it can be arranged.'

((Don't get used to that frequency of updates. It won't last forever.))