Third Person POV
After Freddie met Heidi and Maya, he headed back up to Sam's room with new hope. He'd come in to a stony faced Carly and a still unconcious Sam. He'd walked in and felt it in the air. He plopped the bear in a far corner and sat in one of the chairs next to Carly. When Spencer had arrived he'd given him a silent greeting and gone back to watching Sam, looking for the smallest flicker of movement. Anything to restore hope. Spencer had left after visiting hours were over. Carly and Freddie fought to be able to stay overnight. With a flash of puppy dog eyes and a long list of reassurances, the doctor had agreed. Freddie could tell though, from the polite sympathy in his eyes, that he only let them stay because he too, had given up hope.
Carly slept in the only recliner in the room. Freddie sat in one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs for hours, just watching Sam. Long after Carly had fallen asleep he was still watching; still hoping. He hadn't known he'd fallen asleep. He'd been awaken though by the busy hospital sounds and realized someone had draped a blanket over him as he slept. The first thing he did when he opened his eyes was look at Sam. She was still immoble and unconcious. The monitor said that she was still breathing, thanks to all of the machines she was hooked up to.
Freddie stood up and looked over to see that Carly was still asleep. He walked over to Sam's bedside and looked down at her still form. Back at his house, when she slept she looked beautiful. Now, it was too sad.
Her skin was too discolored and her hair was too pale. Her lips were chapped and dull. Her body was too small...
Freddie reached down and carefully put his hand on top of one of hers. It was cold and bony. The skin felt dry, but he didn't move his hand away. All he wants is for her to make it through. And as he softly stroked her hand, he hoped with all of his might that that would cause her to wake up.
But that's a lesson that he'd learned only too well. You can hope and hope and hope for something. You could wish it with all your might. But it's fate's decision. And sometimes, you lose.
He wouldn't stop hoping though. He would hope and he would fight until her heart stopped beating. He would probably continue to hope after that.
He heard a light knock on the wall of the hospital room and he turned around to see one of the last people he thought would show up.
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"I thought about what you said," She said, jumping right to the point. She stepped into the room and ran a hand through her blonde hair. "And you were right. I haven't been a good person. I haven't shown my daughters how much I love them and how much I care about them. Not since their dad died. But I'm going to change that. I am." He didn't say anything and she didn't expect him to because she continued her stride and walked all the way into the room and over to the other side of the bed. She looked down at Sam and he looked at her, across from him, as she did so.
Freddie watched as Pam Puckett looked down at her daughter. Yesterday, the woman was a drunken mess and she was dressed like it too. But today, she looked sober enough and she was wearing the simplest thing he had ever seen her wear- blue jeans and a red long sleeved shirt. She wasn't wearing makeup and as she looked at Sam, Freddie thought he saw a tear fall down her face. She stood up straight and feigned scratching her nose, wiping the tears away. She continued to look down at Sam and hesitantly, she reached down and touched her face. Freddie looked down at Sam as she did so, hoping maybe this interaction with her mother would wake her up.
But she still didn't move.
"Ms. Benson...?" Freddie kept his eyes glued to Sam's face and so did Pam.
"Call me Pam." The woman said softly, running her hands over Sam's pale, brittle hair.
"Can I talk to you... er, Pam?" Freddie asked her, watching her maneuver around the tubes strapped to Sam. He slowly slifted his head and looked at eyes narrowed and her mouth opened to speak but he shook his head.
He reluctantly walked away from Sam's bed and over to the faraway corner of the room. Pam followed looking at him suspiciously the whole time.
"Okay, I'm going to step out on a limb here," He says more to himself, "I want to tell you something... Kind of," He says, looking nervous. He was avoiding her eyes and running his hand through his hair. Pam had seen this multiple times with some of the men she had dated. After her husband died she had tried to 'get back out there' but hadn't had much luck. Many men though, had run their hands through their hair and avoided eye contact, right before breaking up with her or telling her they're married and/or many other things that made them nervous.
"Why are you so nervous? You and Sam aren't dating, are you?" Pam asks, getting defensive and ready to pounce on him if he did anything to her.
"No no!" Freddie said, shirnking back and looking at her with pure fright.
"Then what's your deal Nerdie?" Pam asks, rolling her eyes and growing impatient. Freddie took a deep breath and then stood up straight.
"No. Pam... Sam and I are not dating... But I'd like to..." Freddie admitted, suddenly becoming very interested in his shoes.
"Like to what?" Pam asks.
"I would like to date your daughter, maam." Freddie says nervously, putting his hand on the back of his neck and glancing up at her face but not looking her in the eyes.
"Um," Pam started, taken aback by his formal manner. Freddie shook his head and interrupted her.
"I know what you're thinking. She tortures me all the time... I'm like her own personal punching bag... Seriously, sometimes when the fight is on and Im too close..." He says with a knowing look. .He shakes his head and continues. "Anyway., I'm fine with that. I mean, honestly that's one of the things I love about her. I mean, and there's a list. Believe me, I wrote one last night. But you see-" He continued ranbling but Pam interrupted him.
"Yeah, yeah I get it. Why are you tellng me?" She asks, raising her eyebrow. Freddie blinked and looked at her for a few moments.
"Well... I- I'm in love with your daughter... I just... I wanted to make a better impression than I did yesterday, And even if she does agree and become my girlfriend I wanted to make sure you were okay with it and knew that I would never, ever do anything to hurt your daughter. And I know, I know, keep my hands to myself and all..." He continued. Pam smiled slightly. She couldn't believe how much of her daughter's life she had missed...
"Actually I just realized that I was in love with her yesterday. And I see that, I don't just love her. I'm in love with her and I never even knew it!" Freddie was rambling and he finally looked up to see Pam Puckett smiling widely at him.
If Freddie had learned anything in the years he'd known Sam (and even the few days he'd known Melanie), it was that you can never know what to expect when a Puckett smiles.
He looked at Pam warily as she smiled down at him.
"What?" He asked self conciously. Looking away from her gaze.
"You are such..." She begins, obviously stalling to torture him as much as she can. He braces himself for whatever she says next. Maybe she's still mad from what happened yesterday. Maybe she thinks he's not good for her daughter...
"A dork!" Pam finishes, patting Freddie's shoulder and stepping back. "A cute dork though."
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Freddie POV
Freddie...
Freddie, Freddie...
Her voice is echoing through my head. It's all I hear. I'm staring down at her small, limp body and I can hear her voice in my head.
It would be so easy to pretend that the girl lying in that bed was someone. Someone who wasn't Sam. And someone I wasn't in love with. I could pretend that Sam was actually standing beside me, looking down at the poor girl blabbing on and on about how if the girl had've eaten more meat or fatcakes, none of this would have happened.
But the voice in my head, the Sam in my head, was not the Sam that would do something like that. This Sam, is the Sam that had been calling my voice. The dream Sam. Last night, I had an uncomfortable and long night sleeping on an uncomfortable hospital chair. It was one of those cheap living room chairs that they tried to make look like it was actually comfortable but once you try to sleep on it, you know it's not.
Anyway, last night, I had the dream again. But this time, it was different.
"Freddie?" A voice called to me. It was like I just opened my eyes. I looked around me and realized I was in a forest. It was dark and dreary, I could feel the sorrow and the dark mood of the forest, in the air. It fell upon my shoulders, like a cloak of sadness. The trees covered the sky and when I looked up, all I saw were the leaves and branches of the trees.
There were no cute little forest animals like there usually are in commercials. In fact, the forest was unusually quiet. The only thing I could hear was my own breathing and movement. I sucked in a shocked breath when I heard the voice again.
"Freddie I need you," The voice carried to him in a whisper, the shuffle of the wind putting the words right in his ear. I felt a sudden sense of deja vu. I looked around. This place does seem kind of familiar...
Suddenly, I saw light out of the corner of my eye. It was bright compared to the darkness of the forest and it was compelling me forward. It's sense of bright, normalness, and warmth made me want to get out of this dark, sad place and experience what was there.
I didn't realize I was running until I looked down and saw my feet moving- right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot. It was a steady beat but I could tell I wasn't walking. It was one of those slow, dreamlike runs- making me feel as if if I didn't get to the light in time, it might disappear.
As I neared the light, I saw that I couldn't see past it- all it was was a bright wall of light. I hesitated before continuing forward and into the light.
As I stepped through into the other side of the brightness, I saw that I was in a white room. The brightness of the room was irritating my eyes a little as I looked around, searching for anything that might be in this white room.
I saw something ahead... a bed? I slowly and carefully began walking forward, curious to see what a bed had to do with anything and what -if anything- the bed might hold. The bed seemed to be so far away and I wondered if it was really a room I was in. After discovering that walking wasn't fast enough for my curious eyes, I broke into a run. Another slow, dreamlike run that only made me more irritated.
When I was only about twenty meters away from the bed, I slowed to a walk and focused more on seeing the bed. As I got closer though, the scene changed. Suddenly, it wasn't a bed I was walking to... it was a casket. The top of the casket was up and I saw people on the other side, peering over the top- Carly, Spencer, Gibby, Wendy, I even saw Sam's mom there, looking over, tears falling vigorously down her face. They were all crying, and as I got closer they looked up at me. Their faces turned from sad and grieving to angry and accusing. They all glared at me.
"I can't believe you," Carly sneered, looking at me as if I was vermin.
"So selfish..." Wendy added, her glare almost as intense as Sam's usually was.
Sam.
I just now realized that she wasn't standing peering over the edge of the casket at the person who lay there.
"No," I whispered, refusing to believe it. I walked forward, so I could peer in and see what I was hoping was someone I didn't know. As I neared the casket they all began talking at once, I heard names such as jerk and asshole, but I ignored them. As I reached the casket all of their voices began melting together untl they were nothing buta hum in the background.
I looked in the casket and saw none other than,
Samantha (Sam) Puckett.
She was skin and bones. Literally. Her hair was pale and hard looking, her lips were glued together, and her bue oceany eyes were nowhere to be seen. Her eyelids lay over them because they would never appear again.
Standing there, looking at the girl of my dreams in a casket, and listening to the low hum of voices, all voices that hated me, I just couldn't take it.
"Freddie, I love you…" Her voice echoed inside my now too silent head as I sank to the ground, my head in my hands as the tears broke through.
I had woken up to a dark hospital room and a sleeping Carly and an unconscious were sliding down my cheeks as I tried to convince myself that it was just a dream.
Shh, it's alright. She's alright. She'll be alright.
No one was awake then, and I had fallen back asleep, crying and hoping.
Now, I stood here, looking at her, with that same hope.. that same determination. I know she will make it out of this. She's strong. She can do this... She can...
"Hey," A voice says behind me and, reluctantly, I turn to see Carly standing and looking at me with a polite but still obviously sad look.
"Hey," I nod to her, and turn and glance at Sam again.
"Your... your mom is here..." She says, trailing off.
"Okay." I say, not taking my eyes off of Sam's face.
"She's outside of the curtain." She says. What? Is she still talking about my mother?
"Okay,"
"Well, are you going to go talk to her?" She's starting to get annoyed, I can tell.
"Nope," I let the 'p' pop.
"She's your mother!"
"Which is why she would understand!"
"No, she wouldn't," I say darkly.
"Well, you never know until you try..."
"I'm not going."
"It's just outside!"
"And...?"
"Dammit Freddie!" She says louder and I turn around and give her a confused look. Carly doesn't cuss. Like, ever.
"What," I say innocently.
"Get over there and talk to that woman! She's been glaring at me from the moment she walked in, she's certain I have something to do with the reason you're here and she 'demands' to see you or she'll call the cops for sexual harassment." Carly sighs, walking over and plopping into te uncomfortable chair.
"Sexual harassment?"
"I don't even know but I can not deal with that right now," Carly says, putting her hands over her forehead.
"Okay, Okay. I'll go talk to her but watch Sam. If anything and I mean anything happens, come get me." I tell her, reluctantly walking out of the room. I can still hear the machines next to her bed keeping her heart rate. I hear the steady beat, the steady beeping. I focus only on that as I walk out from behind the curtain and see my mother standing, front and center, waiting for me.
"Oh Fredward! I'm so glad you're okay!" She exclaims, pulling me into a huge bear hug. As I gasped for breath all I listened out for was the beep...beep of the machine.
"Er, hi," I say awkwardly, still listening out for the beep. The walls of this hospital aren't very deep...
"Come on, Fredward. We are going home right now."She orders, grabbing my hand and trying to pull me from the room. I snatch my hand back and she turns to look at me, shocked.
Beep... beep.
"Mom, I'm not leaving. Sam is in the hospital." I look at her. What is wrong with her? The love of my life is lying in a hospital bed and she wants me to leave?
"Samantha? She's the reason you're here? That blonde haired demon? Why do you care? All of the stuff she's done to you over the years?" My mother asks, looking at me with a puzzled look. I stand up taller and look her directly in the eye.
"Mother, Sam is my friend. And she's lying in that hospital bed, fighting for her life," I pause.
Beep... beep.
"And you expect me to just leave her?... I thought someone as overprotective as you would... would understand... When someone you care about is hurt, you don't just leave them behind. And I'm not going to leave Sam. I am going to stand by her side, no matter what. And I won't let anyone, even you, stop me from being with her," I say, looking at her firmly. After I moved out, she's been, more or less, easier to handle. She knows that she can't push me too far and I know that she will always try.
My mother looked at me for a moment, with an expression that looked like a mix of angry, wary, and proud. I returned her gaze with one steady and strong.
Beep, beep, beep, beep.
What? I turned, ready to run and see what happened but my mother's hand shot out and stopped me.
"Fredward, I understand that you want to be here for your friend. And I won't force you to abandon her-" Her sentence was interrrupted by a cry from next door.
"Freddie!" A voice that sounded a lot like Carly's called out for me.
Beep beep beep beep beep beep.
The heart beat sounded frantic, as if it might stop any second and once again I turned to go to the door to go back to Sam's room. My mother, ran and beat me there, spreading herself out to block my exit.
"Just... let me finish," She said catching her breath. I waited impatiently, "I won't force you to abandon her. I'm proud that my son has such a heart to care for people who treat him wrong. And-" She kept going on and on but I couldn't hear her anymore.
"Freddie! Freddie!" Carly kept shouting and I listened hard and heard other voices- a nurse, Sam's mom (back from the cafeteria). The heart rate machine was going crazy, beeping alarmingly fast. I looked at my mom, still going on.
"You will come immediately home. No more of that webshow for a while-" I stopped listening, concentrating again on Sam's room as she jabbers on.
Finally, Carly sticks her head out to look at me.
"Freddie! She's-" She starts but stops when she hears the beeping noise behind her. We both look to her side of the curtain. I feel my heart... breaking. I'm not used to this feeling...I feel an ache in my chest and my knees are weak. I feel the tears forming and slipping over my eyelids. I ignore my motherand push through her and Carly's hands into the room just as the final beep sounds- the one that indicates the stopping of a heart.
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{Cliffy cliffy. Sorry. What happens next will surprise you... Read on. Eight reviews please. Happy Holidays - Ariel}
