((Chapter heading is a Within Temptation song. The only reason why I chose it is that I had no idea how to name the chapter (I know what the next one and the next but two will be called even now, ironically) and started playing solitaire while listening to whatever my playlist flung at me. This one felt right.))

Chapter 8

Restless

Jim was frightened. He wasn't going to deny it, and he sure as hell wasn't going to hide it. He had followed Spock to Sinek's home meekly, had let himself be manoeuvred to the left hand side of the upper floor, had prepared to go to sleep – but he couldn't rest. Spock was at the computer, still evaluating whatever data he had collected over the day, and Jim was pacing. At last, he had no idea after how much time, Spock had turned off the computer and told him to go to sleep, apparently intending to do the same. Jim sat down on the bed for all of two seconds before getting back on his feet, unable to stop his thoughts from straying to the ship where one of the few people he had left in the world was in a condition no-one could explain to him. With a barely suppressed sigh, Spock walked over to him and halted his movements. 'Do you trust me, Jim?' he asked softly. The question startled Jim.

'What? Yes. Of course.'

'I trust T'Kray. I trust her as Leonard's bondmate, and I trust her as a psychologist. She told us this is temporary, and I believe her. If you trust me and my judgement, calm yourself.' Jim folded his arms, his entire stance a challenge.

'Then explain it to me, Spock. I don't understand how she can tell, and things I don't understand make me nervous.' Spock nodded.

'Lie down. Stop pacing. I will tell you.' Jim did as he was asked.

'I'm stressing you out, aren't I?'

'I do sense your agitation.' Forcing himself to remain quiet, Jim waited for an explanation. 'Through the bond, it is possible to detect certain things. What happened to Leonard is apparently affecting his mind. That much was obvious. Imagine something like a shield, only not in his control. Something constructed by a third party, a foreign object in his thoughts. For a psychologist without the advantage of telepathy, it is difficult or impossible to find or evaluate such a construct. In a meld, it is easier. And a bond is much deeper still. A barrier may shut out someone attempting to meld, but as long as an intact bond is present, the bondmate can always go everywhere. Imagine that the shield cannot cut that link, but grows around it. Therefore, T'Kray can tell how stable the barrier is, if it can be broken, or if it will dissolve by itself because their bond is still rooted behind the wall, deep inside Leonard's mind. If the cause was someone tampering with his mind, she can find that out and undo the damage.'

'What other reason could there be?' Jim asked, admittedly more at ease than he had been.

'Unknown. But I do not doubt that we will find out.' Gentle fingers brushed over Jim's cheeks. 'Do not vex yourself. Speculating what might be the cause will not help at this point. Perhaps something occurred when Leonard was alone with patient seven, something he did not believe was worth mentioning.' Jim turned to his side to face Spock. What little light made it into the room was reflected in his eyes, making them the only discernible feature. Pairing two fingers, he caressed Spock's temple.

'Thank you, my love. For your patience with me.' Spock shook his head.

'There is no need for gratitude, T'hy'la.' Jim's fingers found the soft lips and he felt a kiss being placed on them.

'I know Sinek's a Vulcan and can hear a mouse in the attic, and I know this isn't going to be a very long night anyway, but Spock … I want you.'

'In addition to what you pointed out, let me remind you that the air is considerably thinner here than what you are used to.' Jim smiled. He knew he had won. If Spock had turned him down, he would have done that differently.

'True. Very true. Well, if you don't want to …' A finger was placed on Jim's lips, silencing him. Spock kissed him then, slowly and with all the love they shared.

'We will be quiet. Sinek may hear, but he is distracted himself.' Jim's eyes went wide.

'You mean …'

'I mean that he and T'Lin are engaging in a similar activity to what you have in mind.' Jim grinned at that and pushed Spock on his back, straddling him. When he felt strong hands travelling up his arms to settle on his neck he finally managed to shove his concern aside. For the moment, all that mattered was Spock.

Ϡ

The concern on James's face was glaringly obvious. T'Kray had assumed that he'd be less than relaxed when she came back from the ship alone. At least he didn't demand an explanation, he simply stared at her and waited until they were alone. Not in the VSA, in Sinek's home as she had asked. The request had only added to his disquiet, but something had gone horribly wrong at one point the previous day, and T'Kray wasn't going to let it happen again. She had whispered an urgent warning to Sinek in passing, hoping that he would heed it.

The moment they were secluded in the place Sinek had offered James and Spock for their stay, her Captain let go of all pretence at composure and started pacing. Judging from the way Spock halted him gently, steering him to a chair, not for the first time.

'Captain, Doctor McCoy will be available again the day after tomorrow. We could isolate a substance in his blood stream that is currently being analysed.'

'He was poisoned?'

'Yes and no. Drugged.' She sighed and folded her hands before her on the small table. 'While he could think freely, he could only act on what he was told to do. If that instruction had come in a meld, it could have been very complex.'

'Complex as in booby trap the Academy and explode half the staff, taking care to keep certain individuals safe?' A slight smile flickered over T'Kray's face.

'Yes. Although I doubt that the plan involved explosives.'

'Accident?'

'No. Someone wanted to incapacitate him or somebody else, I believe.'

'How?'

'Food, I believe. But since he is the only one showing symptoms, I think that he might not have been the intended target.'

'Or perhaps he was,' Spock said. 'As we all know, he might be the one with the best chances to find out what is causing the epidemic.' T'Kray pursed her lips.

'Again, yes and no. There are more people than just us working on the problem. A few of them have equal chances. What you suggest, Spock, is that someone has an interest in keeping the epidemic active, and as long as that is only supported by conjecture, I refuse to accept it as fact.'

'What else would you suggest, then?'

'Perhaps that someone who is just not on the way into the desert tampered with his food. I asked Sinek not to eat at the VSA for the time being and to pass the message on to T'Lin. James, I would hope that you could interview the kitchen staff.'

'Of course.'

'There's something else.' She looked at Spock. 'I ask you to go up to the ship and have them take a sample of your blood. You had the same batch of food Leonard did.'

'I am not drugged, T'Kray.'

'Even if the substance has no effect on you, I want to know if it is present. Please report to sickbay, Dr. Durlan is waiting for you.' Spock inclined his head, indicating his consent. 'In the meantime I intend to hear a lecture at the VSA. I cannot stress it enough: Do not eat there. We don't know how Len was drugged. We can't afford that we get the same.' She looked pointedly at Spock, and he contacted the ship to visit sickbay. 'And us?' T'Kray asked once Spock was gone. 'Do we meet here in, say, two hours?' After a moment's hesitation, James nodded.

'T'Kray, do you think …' She raised both hands.

'At this time, I don't think anything, and I will not speculate. Perhaps I know more in a few hours.'

'Did you warn Charika about the food?' She nodded briefly.

'Of course.'

'If you hear anything …'

'You'll be the first to know.'

Ϡ

Dr. Durlan was a small, round-faced woman with a barking laugh, extremely short hair, and a generally brash attitude. That didn't change the fact that she cared deeply for her patients and that she was rather disconcerted by the substance they had isolated. She had vanished with a huff after getting a blood sample from Spock and now he was left to wait. Twice he caught himself preparing to stand and enter the laboratory. When Dr. Durlan emerged after 34 minutes, she looked grim.

'Nothing but an overactive immune system. Nothing to point my finger at. And that's precisely what I feared. Damn.'

'Are you disappointed that I was not drugged, Doctor?' Spock asked. She folded her arms and glared at him.

'No. I'm half sure you were, but the stuff has such a short half-life I couldn't find it any more. Doesn't mean it can't have an effect. Get over there.' She gestured to a biobed, and deciding that cooperation would make this visit shorter rather than longer, he obliged. 'Damn,' she said again. 'I'm not McCoy, but you're not all right. Look yourself.' Spock looked at the monitor and raised one eyebrow.

Perhaps he should have known what he would see, but if he was honest with himself, he hadn't. His controls were so firmly in place that he hadn't noticed it, but there was too much activity underneath the surface that was conscious thought. 'Kaiidth,' he said after a moment.

'Excuse me?' Spock returned his gaze to the small woman.

'What is, is, Doctor. I need to return to Vulcan.'

'I'd rather find out what this is.' She gestured to the monitor.

'I know already. I wish to learn how and why. While I can.' He frowned. 'Is Doctor McCoy in isolation, or can I speak to him?' Durlan shrugged.

'You can talk to him all right, but he won't be able to say more.'

'No. Thank you, Doctor.' It was, of course, impossible to feel a person's gaze, but Spock could have sworn that he did when he walked out of sickbay. He used the time it took to reach the CMO's quarters to quell a budding emotional response. When he asked for entrance, he found McCoy at the computer, looking rather dejected.

'Hi, Spock. God, I want out of here. I think I've got something to immunise us against the substance. I'm fine, really.'

'I would take your word for it, but both Dr. Durlan and T'Kray believe you should remain here for a little while.'

'What's wrong, Spock? Is there something wrong with me no-one's saying? Because you look like you just saw a ghost.'

'Only my own, Leonard.' The Doctor's mouth opened and closed again. 'I may have received the same substance you did. Its effect on me is different, however. It seems to affect my mind, as well, but not by opening it to suggestions.' Leonard's eyes went wide.

'Oh no. Oh God, no.' McCoy reached out and squeezed Spock's arm. 'I can't do anything when the damage is done, Spock. The timeframe is so short that any counteraction needs to follow ingestion of the drug immediately.'

'I will speak to Vires. She is able to resist. Perhaps I can do the same and give you time.' Leonard swallowed.

'Yes. I … I need to get out of here!'

'Doctor, you …'

'No. This just got personal. I'm not sitting here, doing nothing useful. I need to … I need to talk to Jim, I need to get back into the lab. Research on the computer is fine, but it's not enough. I'm not letting you die, Spock!' Spock stood and offered a small smile.

'The onset of the symptoms seems to be different for every individual. They came very quickly in Stal's case, but in Vires there was a delay by four days. Perhaps if I prepare my defence already, I can win more time. But … I must admit that your confinement is a reason for concern. I do not wish to die, and I believe you are my best hope.'

Ϡ

Jim's search of the kitchens had revealed absolutely nothing. No one had seen anything, no one had heard anything, and there hadn't been anyone working in the kitchen who wasn't supposed to be there. Anywhere else, Jim would have doubted the truthfulness of the statements or he might have thought that the personnel weren't observant enough. But this was Vulcan, and people didn't lie here. They also didn't miss stuff that didn't fit into the pattern. Therefore, he just took what he had heard at face value and decided that some of the staff might be drugged themselves or that someone had a very clever and very worrying agenda.

What he found back at Sinek's house did nothing to lesson his concern: T'Kray stared at Spock, saw Jim coming, and checked her facial expression into a mask that showed nothing. 'What's wrong?' Jim asked at once. The two Vulcans exchanged a glance.

'McCoy has found a preventive measure that offers protection from the drug,' Spock said. 'He cannot, as of now, cure the condition it causes. In humans, it seems to pass. Unless Dr. Durlan is mistaken, in Vulcans the effect is more … lasting.' Jim had been able to read Spock before their bond. He had known the man for so long, loved him for so long, that he'd learned to see the smallest nuances on his face where others – except Bones, perhaps – wouldn't have detected any emotion at all. Now he saw a profound sadness in his eyes, and he realised that something was very, very wrong. The bond was silent, Spock's shields stopping Jim from seeing the truth there. Ignoring T'Kray, he walked until he stood very close to him and took both hands into his.

'What are you not telling me, Spock?' he asked in an undertone. He wasn't sure he wanted to hear. He thought he already guessed it, but as long as Spock didn't say it, it wasn't true. A childish notion maybe, but it drew out these few seconds into an eternity of blissful unawareness.

'The epidemic is unlikely to be a disease. It appears it is caused by the substance that Leonard received. As did I, Jim.'

'Are you sure?'

'I am certain that the bio-scanners picked something up that likely indicates a very early stage of the same affliction. At this time I cannot sense the symptoms in myself and I will keep meditating. I believe I am able to use Vires's technique, too, and I will speak with her again and seek assistance. But the fact remains that something is wrong, and to seek another reason would be running away from the truth.'

'That leaves us with a number of very serious problems,' T'Kray said. Her voice was quiet, but it cut through Jim's bubble like a knife. The floor beneath him suddenly felt very real, as did the room, the two Vulcans, the very air. He recognised the adrenalin rush for what it was and knew he'd have to soak the fallout later. For now, it gave him the strength to perform the mammoth task of turning around and looking at her. 'The first one is, cruel as it is, that none of us will care so much for Stal as we do for Spock. That this is inherently wrong doesn't change the fact. But we cannot rush ourselves into mindless action or we will do more harm than good.' Jim didn't trust himself to answer. He felt Spock's hand close around his and squeeze. The Vulcan's shields were softening, allowing Jim to sense that despite the news, Spock still had that profound hope that anything was possible. He shot him a smile full of gratitude and love and saw the same emotions reflected in his bondmate's eyes. 'It also means that we cannot speak about what we found to anyone. I do not believe that Sinek or T'Lin are involved, but we cannot now. Everyone but us is a potential co-conspirator.'

'You've got practice with that one,' Jim said, and T'Kray smiled darkly.

'Yes James. And do not ever forget that we survived Dainam. I was going to ask you to let me plan what actions to take since I am familiar with conspiracies.' He nodded.

'And I'm grateful for that.'

'One thing I wish us all to keep in mind is that we have seen something similar recently. This may be the same drug that was used on Driin.' Jim's mouth fell open, but T'Kray held up a hand and he remained silent. 'Its effect on Len is very similar or even identical, but this is conjecture. Still, we should consider the possibility.

'And at long last,' T'Kray said slowly, 'it means that I need to meld with Charika.'

'What?'

'He brought Spock and Leonard their plates.' Her hands curled into fists for a moment. 'I need to see if he was under some influence or …'

'I refuse to believe that he'd choose to poison anyone, let alone Bones. He admires him.'

'I don't want to think it possible, but I have to face the fact that it is an option. He is more likely to be the victim, but I will not be overwhelmed by shock if I find out he is actually part of it.'

'He has no reason,' Spock said sensibly.

'No. But I can't let my personal closeness to him get between myself and my objectivity.' T'Kray pursed her lips. 'While I do not believe in action for the hell of it, as Len would put it, time is of the essence. Spock, go to Vires. Jim … help me track down Charika. And if he refuses to share his mind with me hold him.' Jim's eyes widened.

'You … but that's …' T'Kray slammed her fist onto the table.

'Someone poisoned my bondmate and one of my oldest friends. Whoever is responsible will pay, and I don't care if I hurt them in the process.' She closed her eyes. 'I want to bleed them, Jim. I won't, but I will find out who did it. Are you with me?' Jim took a deep breath.

'Yes, of course. But he might also struggle if he is drugged himself.' A weary smile formed on T'Kray's face.

'I raised Charika as I would have a Vulcan child. I have melded with him innumerable times to share knowledge, to find where he aches, to soothe the pain I found. If he refuses to meld with me, something must be very wrong.'

'You don't really believe that he's a conspirator, do you?' She shook her head.

'No. I don't. And I certainly don't want to. But I must be prepared even for that.'