Chapter 2 – Jury (Part 2 of 4)

Life is full of unpleasant things, at the heart of it all, isn't it?

Rapists, pedophiles, assassins, and slavers; all of which I'd destroyed in my time.

Then there were murderers, thieves, gang-bangers, and bullies; all of which I'd been called in my time.

Not many of those were alive long enough to repeat their statements, I'm afraid. As much as the Alliance tried to paint me as a hero, butcher probably was a much more accurate description when it came to Torfan, and I'd never denied it. Not once.

Victory in battle was reserved for the strong; that was a belief I had always held dear. Honor was something I always felt should be earned, as well, but once it had been bestowed upon someone in my eyes I always found it very hard to take back. Live by the sword, die by it, right?

Because of that belief, of all the things that existed in this universe, the thing that caused me the most frustration? Liars. Liars walked that fine line between tact and outright dishonesty, that grey area between right and wrong. Part of why everyone considered me to be such a brutal woman is because of my tendency to speak my mind no matter what the outcome, even when under the command of others. It had earned me reprimand after reprimand, but my CO's couldn't argue with my cockiness when I graduated from N7 training at the top of my class. You'd be amazed how much bullshit the military will tolerate when that bullshit is from a soldier they've spent millions of credits to train and arm, and who they one day hope to have plausible deniability of when the shit hits the fan.

That's why I told Anderson there was no damn way I was spying on Cerberus for him, any more than I was going to spy on the Alliance for Cerberus. Because, frankly, they both were so damn full of themselves it was ridiculous. The galaxy, and more specifically the entire human race, were at stake, and they were all wanting to argue politics and power. Well, I sure as hell wasn't going to let the Illusive Man gain any more influence over my life than he already held, and the Council had their shot to earn my loyalty.

Let me state this: I don't hate aliens. Quite the opposite, in fact. I don't think humanity in general is a superior race, though I would admit that I considered myself to be the exception to that rule. They other races would be useful allies against the upcoming showdown with the Reapers, make no mistake, if we could come to some kind of mutual compromise. A soldier is a warrior is a fighter. All were worthy of my time and my gun.

The salarians, asari, drell, krogan, hanar, elcor, volus, hell even the vorcha (if the krogan continued to hold their leash) could all prove to be valuable allies in unseen ways, well worth expending the effort to remain on somewhat friendly terms.

And the turians? Well, if it came down to intergalactic battle, that was the species I wanted at my back.

Militaristic, honorable, trained for battle from puberty, the cooperation of these modern day Spartans would be essential to humanity's survival when it came time for the gunfire to begin.

Which is the only reason Garrus Vakarian still had his life when his treachery was laid bare. His jokes and laughs and smiles were all false, all with the intent of spying on me.

That, in my book, made him a liar.

Oh yes, I was perfectly aware of what was going on very shortly after his rescue. Somehow, though, the idea of eliminating another Spectre seemed…overkill, if you'll pardon the pun. His skills would be invaluable once we hit the Omega-4 relay, his battle prowess having grown to almost rival my own in the two years I was gone. With the odds we were up against, I needed every soldier willing to take that jump.

But afterwards? That was a whole different story.

It's not as if I had any qualms taking him on missions, either. His weapons skills were exemplary, his hand-to-hand combat skills just as strong as he had said they were. He was a formidable ally, and even though I knew it would result in his immediate death, it became something of a game for me to test how well into his cover he was; how far he was willing to go to keep his little secret.

Letting Sidonis go? My attempt at getting him to break cover. And I would swear, if only for a moment, that it was going to work, too. In the end, though, he had remembered himself in time to give some speech about not being able to see the world in gray. Still, if nothing else, I'd drawn one little phrase away from his errand.

"What would you do, if someone betrayed you?" It seemed, in that moment, that he would tell me. What would I have done then, I wonder, if he just came clean and admitted his little charade.

So I baited him.

"I'm not sure, but I wouldn't let it change me."

The more time I spent around that turian, the harder my decision to end his life was becoming. I didn't want to have him assassinated. He was much too valuable an asset for that anyway. But this form of treachery could not be excused without penalty, that was for sure. Walking into the batteries and putting a bullet into his brain just seemed too simple. He was a warrior, if nothing else, and one thing he hadn't done was lie to me outright.

Hedged, answered questions with questions, and deflected. But never lied.

So how to handle it so that my own personal sense of honor was satisfied by giving him a chance to fight, without dragging the rest of the crew into it?

It was quite the delimma, to be sure, and one that remained unsolved as we traipsed about the galaxy. Then, he decided to share his little story? I had an idea.

A wonderful, awful idea, as the saying went.

So…my little offer to blow off steam was just that, if one could view a battle for survival as such. I know I sure would probably see it that way. Gunfire and explosions had always appealed to me, or I'd never have become the warrior I was. I expected he viewed things much the same way.

So we would test a little reach and flexibility, as well, and a plethora of other abilities before we were done. There was an apartment in the Argus Rho cluster I still held the deed to, and that would do as our battleground. I just hoped he had the sense to come armed, in spite of his belief that he was going to be there have sex and nothing more. Otherwise, he wasn't the warrior I believed him to be.

Two spectres would enter that apartment, but only one would leave. I had enough confidence to honestly say that even I was unsure of the outcome, yet I relished the idea of the challenge, assuming both of us managed to survive the Collector base.

If nothing else, it would be a fight to remember.