Thank you to:

freakyfriday13 - I agree! Amy is getting far to curious, and I was the one who created her! I'm trying to make her a bit like Joey, though :)

M. Cullen Hightopp - I've updated! *Bows back* And thank you. I accept the force of razors and pies. And yes, I've often noticed my name has the word 'read' in it :) It's an Irish name and pronounced Meraid, but my teachers call me Mairead as in Mayread because Mai is french! It's very annoying.

And I have no idea what you will be if you even MADDER. Maybe a...Mad MAD Hatter?

Chapter Sixteen

I jumped onto my bed, not caring about my dress, and buried my face in the pillow, crying. I was just so scared, I couldn't stop shaking!

Hugging the pillow closer, I let out another sob.

Were they…were they really talking about me? Or was I being paranoid?

What was it he called me? Oh yes, a foolish girl.

How was I a foolish girl? Yes, I had no memories or recollection of how I got here, or anything before now, but that was of no fault of my own!

And what did I have no idea about? Was there some sort of surprise or secret? Was I the subject of a private joke going around the household?

A few more tears ran down my cheeks. How could a man, a man that told me he cared for me, do that to me? How could he mock me and patronize me behind my back to his friend?

For a moment, at some point, I seemed to think…

I seemed to think he was like a Father to me.

He had helped me in my time of need. He stood by me most of my life, even though I could not remember it. He was the one that helped me when my father was sent away, my mother took her own life and my lover abused me. He was my saviour.

But he wasn't, was he?

No. A saviour, a helper, a father figure, did not laugh at someone behind their backs. He did not mock them. He did not shout at them. He did not do any of the things that Judge Turpin had done.

And yet…I truly thought he cared for me.

I should've known. It was too good to be true. How could a girl such as me, who had done such terrible things in the past, ever be happy again without it being ripped apart in front of my eyes?

I couldn't.

Yet more tears ran down my cheeks, but I brushed them off. As I lay there silently, thinking, I soon realised how tired I was.

Yawning, I allowed my eyes to slowly shut before sleep soon took over me.

I was laying in a bed…a white room…

A man stood in the doorway, staring at me. I must've recognized him, because I gave him a smile.

"Are you gonna come in or what?" I asked. He nodded and sat down.

We sat in silence…a deafening silence…

Suddenly, the red turned into black, and I was alone.

"Hello?" I called, jumping up and spinning around. I suddenly fell down, screaming as I continued falling and falling and falling…

"MURDERER. MURDERER. MURDERER." Thousands of voices chanted, over and over again.

I screamed and begged for help. No one came. They simply continued chanting with hateful voices, the venom of their words drowning me.

"MURDERER."

"HELP ME!" I screamed one last time before the venom rose above my head…

I shot up and straight into Anna's arms.

"Oh Anna!" I sobbed, digging my face into her shoulder. Anna wrapped her arms around me and gently swayed, as if I was a child instead of a woman.

"It's alright, Johanna, you were having a nightmare."

"But it seemed so real!" I whispered through my tears. Anna's arms tightened around me protectively.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked.

I pulled away, thinking. If I told her, there was some horrible possibility that Anna would think me mad. But I needed to talk to someone.

Nodding silently, I wiped my eyes.

"I was…in a room…a big white room…and there was a man…but I knew him, Anna, I knew him from somewhere…I let him in and we simply stared at each other…and then he disappeared and there were these voices and they were saying the most horrible things and – "

I cut myself off by letting out a sob, the tears running down my cheeks once more. Anna tutted sympathetically as she reached forwards and hugged me again.

"Oh Johanna. What did the voices say?"

I couldn't answer. I was too hysterical.

Anna stayed with me for a while, gently rocking me and rubbing my back, murmuring kind words into my ear and calming me down. Once she had succeeded, she helped me change out of my dress and into my nightgown.

"I'll take the dress to Mildred. She'll know what to do." Anna told me, gently brushing my hair.

"Thank you, Anna." I murmured sleepily. It was quite late again.

Anna smiled at me. "It's fine, Johanna. You know you can always talk to me, don't you?" She asked, reaching down to hook her little finger around mine. I smiled back.

"Judge Turpin says I'm not allowed to be friends with you." I suddenly remembered. Anna's smile fell slightly.

"Oh."

"I don't care though," I said quickly. "I want to be your friend."

The next morning, I woke with a terrible headache.

Groaning, I shut my eyes and rested my head on the pillow again, wishing I could simply go back to sleep. But, no, I was too awake.

Sighing, I rolled over onto my side.

Why was I here?

Surely, now I was a grown woman, I could simply leave. I could pack my things and leave. I could even take Anna with me!

But where would we go?

Neither of us had any money, and knew of no one in London that would help us.

Maybe, if I was able to find him, I could go back to this sailor…

No. I shook the idea out of my head. No. I was not going to go back to the man that caused such trauma to me I lost my memory.

After a while, Mildred and Anna came in and helped me dress and do my hair. After I refused breakfast (I wasn't hungry), I waited until they had left and then picked up a book and sat on the window seat.

I stayed in my room for a majority of the day, alone. I needed to be alone, to think.

I didn't realise how late it was getting until someone knocked at my door.

"Come in." I called softly, thinking it to be a maid.

"Johanna,"

I froze. That was not a maid.

Taking in a deep breath, I turned my head to face Judge Turpin.

"Hello, sir." I replied stiffly.

He studied my face briefly, his eyes cold and calculating. I simply stared at him with a hard gaze, my eyes never wavering from his.

"Are you ready to apologise for you sinful actions last night?" He asked.

"I was not aware that it was my actions that were sinful." I told him. Judge Turpin raised an eyebrow.

"Surely you must know that listening in to people's conversations is a sinful action." He said.

"Then surely you must know that attacking a woman is a sinful action." I challenged.

"I did not attack you, Johanna." He said through gritted teeth. I didn't reply as I turned to read my book once more.

"Don't turn away from me, girl." He growled suddenly, storming forwards and snatching the book out of my hands. I gazed up at him, raising an eyebrow. He glared down at me.

"May I have my book please?" I asked calmly.

"Johanna."

"May I have my book please?" I repeated.

Judge Turpin reluctantly held out the book, and I quickly snatched it out of his hand. As I turned away again, he grabbed my wrist and yanked me up.

"Sir – "

"Now you listen to me, girl," He growled. "I've done everything I can for you, and so far you are proving to be nothing but ungrateful. I want to see changes, otherwise I will regret ever taking you in."

I glared at him as I pulled my wrist out of his grip.

"I am not afraid of you," I hissed, my face close to his. "I am not going to succumb to your ridiculous rules and cruelty. You are nothing but a bully."

Judge Turpin chuckled, a soft, slow chuckle. Shivers ran down my spine. Laughter was something joyful, something that would make you want to laugh as well, to cheer up. But not his laughter.

"Oh Johanna, you poor girl. You have no idea, do you?" He asked softly, bringing his face even closer to mine. We were within kissing distance, our noses practically touching.

"About what?" I breathed out, realising how close we were. He leant even closer.

"I am the boss around here." He told me.

And then he kissed me.