Chapter 15

Sophie pov

It had been two weeks since the Mary incident. People would think I would dread to remember that day, but all I could think of was that day.

The way Sian's lips felt on mine. God I still gasp for air just by thinking of it. But that's not the only thing I kept thinking of. Every time I thought of what it meant a familiar fear washed over me.

"Beep, Beep, beep" my morning clock went off. Not that I needed it, I'd gotten used to brooding all night since it happened.

As I got up I looked at the date. September 22nd, I gulped. I've been dreading this day for a long time. I wouldn't let myself think of what today meant. I brushed away the few tears that had fallen and I looked at the empty bed next to me. "Thank god, they put her in an isolation cell. I don't think I could've handled her today" I thought.

I started to get out of my PJ's. I was roaming in my closet looking for something to wear when a knock on the door startled me. "Soph? She said as she entered.

I widened my eyes, quickly took the first thing I could find out of my closet and put it in around me to cover my body.

"Shit, sorry I should've waited" she said as she covered her eyes and turned around.

I quickly put on some trousers and a shirt. She turned around as I cleared my throat still covering her eyes with her hands.

"Is it okay to look...because I'm starting to get cramps and…" she started saying as I took her hand of her eyes.

"Hi" she said shyly.

I smiled at her as she entwined our fingers. "You wanna do breakfast" she said chipper.

I chuckled and nodded.

….

After breakfast I had been watching a movie with Sian in the video room. I saw her gazing at the clock.

"Don't you have that interactive group thing" she said tenderly stroking my hair. I snorted at her.

"What? It might be good for you to go" she continued. I sighed and started to get up.

"Wait, wait" she said as she pulled me back down "I was only saying, no need to get upset. I just want you to get better" she pouted.

I grimaced at her and was about to lean in when Gertie came into the room. We quickly shuffled away from each other.

"Sophie you have visitors waiting for you she said" I gulped and glared at Sian.

She was smiling at me. "Go on, I won't go anywhere" she whispered.

As I arrived in the family room I saw my dad, Rosie, and…. I lump in my throat started forming as I saw him waiting there for me too.

"Soph!" my dad shouted as he got up and hugged me. I was soon passed to Rosie who kissed me on the cheek, leaving a red mark.

I looked at him, tears already forming in my eyes. He took my hand "its okay Sophie, I'm not here to shout at ya" he said calmly. I laughed nervously.

"So how've you been babes" Rosie asked. I nodded shyly at her.

"Still giving us the silent treatment ay" my dad joked as Rosie nudged him.

I kept staring at him, my eyes never leaving his. I suspect dad sensed the tension and cleared his throat.

"We'll give you two a minute" he said dragging Rosie with him.

I saw him smiling at me, but I couldn't return the favor. It was too hard.

"Come on Soph, crack a smile. You look like you just failed an exam or summit" he joked.

I swallowed hard.

He took a deep breath. "You remember what day it is?" he said with hurt in his eyes.

I nodded as my body began to shake. "I thought we could celebrate his birthday" he continued.

My eyes almost popped out of my head. "he's got to be joking" I thought.

He took something out of his bag. "Look" he said holding out a small plastic train to me. My eyes started watering.

"I bought it a couple of months ago… before…, I thought we could go put it on his grave when you get out of here." He said sadly.

Tears were streaming down my cheeks. "If you ever get out of here" he muttered.

I started shaking my head. "Why the hell not!" He hissed at me.

I started panting. "O god here we go again" I thought.

"I know you're hurting, but I'm hurting too. I lost him too you know" he said as he raised his voice.

"But you don't see me in a mental institution, you don't see me taking pills to forget everything" he uttered.

He took out his wallet and showed me a picture. "Do you want to forget him?"

"Ches'" I whimpered.

"Well do you" he kept pushing.

"Of course not" I shouted for the first time in months. "Why are you doing this to me" I cried.

"To make you talk to me." He said quietly.

My blood boiled as I looked up.

"I'm sorry I said those things, but I knew you wouldn't talk to me if I didn't push you hard enough" he said stroking my hand.

I started sobbing, putting my head in my hands.

"Here take it" he said as he gave me the picture and got up.

"I just want you to know that I don't blame you anymore" he said as he gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze and walked away.

I clutched the picture and started running back to my room.

I spotted Sian in the hallway."Soph" she said tenderly trying to get a hold of my hand. She tried to follow me, but I slammed the door in her face and locked it. I leaned my back against the door and glided down on to the floor.

….

Sian pov

I was worried about her. She slammed the door in my face. I tried opening her door, but it was locked.

"Sophie? What's happened?" I asked her. But there was no reply of any kind.

I saw a bad dressed man and a half dressed girl running down our hallway. "Sophie" the man yelled.

"Uh excuse me sir, miss you're not allowed here. I'm sorry" Gertie said, trying to lead them outside.

"What happened to her" I blurted out.

"Come on sir, she'll come to you when she's ready, and you Sian go to your room" Gertie ordered.

"But Gertie.." I said but she interrupted me. "Now Sian" she said sternly.

"Fuck sakes" I said as I entered my room. Wtf is going on.

Sophie pov

The hallway finally emptied. I was holding my knees to my chest looking at his picture.

Memories started floating back.

Flash back

I was holding him in my arms, he was so beautiful and he smelled so good. I was rocking him.

"Not half bad ay" Chesney joked.

"Half bad? He's perfect" I grinned.

"Sophie… I'm not so sure I want to give him up anymore" he said to me looking serious

"I know me…" I started saying as my mum entered the hospital room.

"Sophie, you really need to sign in the adoption papers" she pleaded with me putting them in front of me.

I was looking at the consent forms and then back at the baby in my arms. I couldn't do this; he was mine and no one else's.

"I can't" I whimpered now looking at my mum.

"Oh honey no. I know it's hard, but your only 15 you can't take care of a baby it'll ruin your life" she said to me.

"I don't care, I can't do this. I don't want to" I snapped as looked down at my son.

"And how do you plan on taking care of him ay" she hissed at me.

"Mum I'll be sixteen in 2 months, I can get a job. Ches already has one…" I started sobbing.

"Mum, please… don't make me do this, it's too hard, please, please I love him so much already" I sobbed harder.

"Ookay, okay. If this is what you want" she soothed me with a worried glint in her eyes.

I kissed my baby on the forehead and laughed through my tears holding him tight. "You're coming home with me" I said.

I smiled at Chesney, who was no cooing our baby.

"We still haven't decided on a name" he said.

"Yeah well, that's because I didn't think we'd have to name him." I joked.

"How about…. Rover" he said

"Rover" I scrunched my face. "Chesney he's not a dog" I laughed at him.

"Well, come on then. I haven't heard any of your suggestions" he smiled.

"Hmmm… what do you think of … Matthias?" I said, still not sure about my suggestion.

"Matthias, I don't know Soph. but if you wanna go that way, why not… Matthew" he said

Matthew I smiled. "Why not" I said to him.

"You like it Matthew" I said to the baby that was sleeping in my arms.

…

I woke up my body still leaning against the door. I looked at the picture and started crying again. "I miss you so much" I whimpered.